-Lost In The Darkness- (Closed for Sinful & Shoey)

[Sinful_whispers]

Lillian walked around her office, as she tapped the edge of the pen to her lip. She watched through the window at the people below walking along the Chicago Sidewalks. People below were wearing shades of grey and black, a rainbow of colors with their umbrellas as they held them over their heads and walked through the rain on a dismal Monday morning. Stella her receptionist was running late but that was not unusual these days. She was seven months pregnant and having a hard time getting about. Lillian told her to take leave that she’d hire a temp until she was ready to return back to work but Stella wouldn’t budge, she said she’ll hire a suitable replacement in a week or two. Lillian trusted her as she did with everything and anything else. Stella had been with her for the past eight years, ever since she came to Chicago from Newberry Connecticut. It was a whole new world and a whole new clientele.

She had her own practice back In Hartford, very prominent clientele, most well off to do but it just wasn’t keeping her satisfied. To her she needed more than unsatisfied spouses and such; she needed more to grasp her attention. About that time she was one of those that were chosen to meet with the military. She was hand delivered a letter that asked her if she would be interested in working with patients under top secret status. Lillian wasn’t told much all she was told was that anything that she was involved with would be high class security, her patients would be as well, and she would be paid well after she relocated to anywhere they asked her with three choices to pick from as long as the slots were not taken. Lillian decided why not, she needed a change and flew to Washington DC for her interview.

Six weeks later she was standing aside watching paid movers pack her belongings up and load it all into a moving van, with the exception of her personal things. She had four weeks to give notice to her clients and help them arrange for another. Lillian had those packed and set aside as she waited for a car to come around and pick her up to take her to the airport. The military was paying for her moving expenses; her new offices as well, they were taking care of the sell of her condo. She watched as the last of her things was packed into the truck making sure they had the right address.

Everything went well as far as the move, she settled into a nicer condo than what she had, as she had a view of the city. She had found out that who she was dealing with was those that the military were doing experiments on. The clients saw her before, as well as after these experiments had taken place. There were a variety of assorted things which made her job seem more fulfilling. They hired a receptionist that Lillian liked, and got along with who was former military herself. They gave her a few weeks to unpack and settle in her new home and office as well as get acquainted with the surroundings. It didn’t take her long but she was glad for the time to herself. She took in a show, went to a few art openings and a museum. She bought a few pieces of art from a local artist who had flare in their work, a darkness that drew her in.

Lillian like most others had a side she kept hidden from many. Some choose to let their out; she chose to keep hers within for most of her life. There was a time in her twenties she’d let the streak take her and consume her within it. She was now thirty eight years old and looked very bit of twenty eight. She had never married, she feared divorce, or least used that as an excuse. Lillian was well off as far as money wise, she made all the right investments and splurged now and then, more on things that would be of value in the future. That day she wore dark shades and dressed down as she roamed the streets, she entered in a few clubs, and watched around her. She loved people and most found her very personable and easy to speak to. She sat in the back of a small Italian restaurant and took a few folders from her briefcase, and began to read about her first three clients that she will be seeing twice that first week.

The first was a woman who was dealing with aliens. Lillian found it amusing as she read her story. The military was running tests upon her and needed Lillian to give a brief summary of her before they begin testing, during and then after. She passed all the lie detectors with flying colors, stating she was telling the truth about being abducted. She was about the same age as Lillian, and the woman claimed to have had a child recently which was now in a secret place because she knew others would kill it or take it and experiment upon it. To Lillian this all sounded like a story one would read in a trash magazine while standing in line at the local grocery store. She was from Nevada and placed in a housing physicality outside the Chicago limits on a military base.


She closed that up and shook her head and opened the next. This one was a case dealing with a terminal ill male in his later fifties. The Military were going to perform a number of radiation tests upon him as he was given one year and three months to live by his doctor, two months ago. She was to evaluate him, before, during as well as after. He would be escorted to her office by military personnel and then they would take him back once the session was over. He was from Vermont, and placed in a housing physicality outside the Chicago limits on a military base.

Lillian closed that file and moved to the next, a fairly young man in his later twenties, who was told he had a brain tumor and had about one year and six months left to live. He was married when he was nineteen to his college sweetheart, and then divorced three years later. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor on the back part of his brain that would kill him in a bit over a year. Lillian sipped her coffee as she looked at the glossy picture of him. He was handsome, and the way he dressed reminded her of a man who worked on Wall Street. From what she could tell he lived a normal life after the divorce, and had no mental illnesses. Physically he was fit except for headaches caused by the pressure of the tumor upon his brain. Lillian took one more look at his picture and then closed the file. He like the others was from another part of the states and moved to the same housing physicality outside the Chicago limits.

Under his file was another that she had not been aware of. There was a post-it note on the cover of the manila envelope, with a small note attached which read, - This is a one time only meeting you will need to make. He is an inmate on death row at the local high maximum security physicality. Your meeting is set for Thursday at eight AM, please be prompt and we will be looking forward to reading your evaluation of him. You will be picked up at six forty-five AM on the twentieth, and escorted by military to the prison and allowed two hours maximum to evaluate. She looked at her watch and then the paper, which would be tomorrow. The last of the note asked her to dress down as much as possible.

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The following morning at six forty-five AM there was a knock at her door. Lillian smiled as she opened the door and greeted an officer dressed in an olive green uniform. She herself was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt with her hair up tightly to the back of her head. He escorted her to the jeep and from there they drove to the prison. The sound of metal to metal clanging behind her as each set of doors closed and a new set opened before her. In a small room with no windows, only a table and two chairs she waited. The door opened and there stood a man in his early forties in an orange jumpsuit with shackles around his ankles, and cuffs around his wrist before him. He was being escorted by four armed guards. She herself had one armed guard from the military in the room behind her at all times.

Lillian found out that he was a sexual predator; he preyed on all ages of women since he was eighteen. It started then with women of his own age at college and those he picked up for sex from various streets in various states. Each one brought him a high and he eventually killed them, all but one he claimed to have kept hidden in a secret place for years. He used her when he wasn’t able to find what he sought out. She took the brutal abuse mentally, physically and sexually. He began to screw up and get careless, letting them slip from him after he was finished and eventually he was caught. Now he had served three years in prison and was to be placed to death in less than a week.

Lillian couldn’t figure out why the military wanted her to evaluate him, he was highly educated, intelligent, his IQ was off the charts yet within him there was so much hate for women, he had so much sexual frustration pent up, and the more he attacked the more he needed to do so again. He claimed he never meant to kill anyone but the acts just got more and more out of control. Each one sent him into euphoria and he was like a drug user, he needed another high, one that would make the previous one seem like it was nothing. She had to admit he was fascinating and yet so sick and disturbed. He had explained how it all started with his mother, the sexual teasing; taunting and then the sex became something she wanted from him more and more. How she’d make him do things he never wanted to do, how she made him feel so guilty until he gave in. Even as an adult he had this control over him that he couldn’t break away from. Then it got to a point where he needed to act out and with doing what he was doing to other women it brought him a feeling of relief.

He went into detail about the S&M clubs, the strip joints, how he’d go from town to town, city to city and pick up whores for sex. He explained there was a time he couldn’t get it up, and he fell for a woman that told him he was still a man, how she tricked him into loving her to get free but he was to smart and caught on to her game so he locked her away in the dark, and only visited her for sex and to feed her. She eventually got free and was the last to ID him and then he was prosecuted and then convicted to death. He explained he didn’t mind dying, only through death would he be free, he knew that if he ever got free that he’d never be able to change. Lillian knew the man was honest, he spoke the truth n his feelings and held nothing back from her.

It neared the end of their time, and he leaned over the table to her and whispered what he’d do to her if there were no guards or bars that kept him from her. It sent a chill through her spine as she could feel the fine hairs upon her neck stand up. He laughed out and say back, looking to her, he was searching a reaction from her and he never got one. The guards came and took him away, and she and her escort left and then he dropped her at the office where she sat and wrote up her evaluation while it was fresh in her mind. That was the start of her new career in Chicago. The following day was her first meeting with the patient with the brain tumor. He was due at her office at nine AM sharp.

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Lillian wore a bright yellow suit, with a white silk shirt under it and yellow stiletto heels to match. She wore her long deep dark red hair up on the back of her head with spiral curls along her face that dangled freely. She entered her office and smiled as coffee was made and Stella was ready to begin. “You nine o’ clock appointment will be here shortly Lillian, if you need anything just ask I’ll be working on typing up the evaluation for Mr. Dawson, then I’ll send it out today.”

Lillian got a cup of coffee, making it as she liked, and smiled again. “Thank you Stella, if you have any problems with it please feel free to ask me. This should be a fairly decent day. They told me I have those four cases and then a bunch of others that were just military related after wards to start with this week. I’ll be in my office please show him in when he arrives.”

Lillian sipped her coffee as she looked around her office. She had a huge cherry wood desk, with a high back leather chair. Across from her were two more black leather chairs and then the typical leather couch as well as a chair for her to sit in while her patients speak. The office was painted a soft tan color and trimmed in walnut. One the walls were paintings she chose from various places and flowers were fresh cut that she as well picked out from the florist close by and were delivered. Her books lined the walls of shelves to the one side and there were a few pictures of family here and there but nothing major. She turned, crossed her legs and waited for her first morning appointment. She had allowed longer sessions of first meetings. This one was about him in general, his condition, how he feels, what he's going to go through, why he made the choice he did to be a guinnea pig for the Military etc. etc.

 

[Shoeguy2369]

Jonathan Schaffer woke as he did for the past few weeks. His sheets wet with sweat, his head pounding as if someone or something was on in the inside of his head trying to get out. This headache that would put a migrane to shame. Not only did the dim light thru the blackout drapes hurt his eyes, but his own breathing hurt his ears. Life was spirling downhill, fast. The headaches consumed what energy Jonathan had in him. Of course there were good days, no pain, slight confusion in what was going on, and the occasional lapse of memory. But for the most part life sucked.

After three consecutive weeks of these headaches Jonathan asked his neighbor, Sarah. A woman in her early forties, she worked at the local supermarket for 24 years, or so her nametag claimed. Sarah helped him into her car, the blinding light of the early morning dawn forced Jonathan to keep his eyes closed shut, his hand over his eyes as well did little to help the pain. Sarah new she had to get him to the doctors as soon as possible. It wasn't in her nature to let those whom are hurting to remain in said state.

Upon arriving at the hospital Jonathan was admited into emergency care. Dr. Sine on duty was the one to take Jonathan into his care. The first thing the Dr wanted to see was an MRI of the patient's head. With the earplugs in, the headphones on, the dark fabric over his eyes the machine pulled Jonathan in to examine the tissue around his brain.

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It was 9 hours later, before Jonathan woke from the effects of the pain killer administered in the emergency room. Groggy, he opened his eyes for the moment relieved that at that moment the pain in his head was gone. The only one in the room was his neighbor, Sarah, what was she doing there? For whatever reason she was there watching him. The curtains were drawn in the small room of the hospital shielding what little light came in from the darkness outside.

It wasn't long after he awoke that a nurse came in to check on him, then quickly left to check on others, only to be replaced with by Dr. Sine. "Can you excuse us please Sarah?" Curiously Jonathan watched as she left the room to wait outside. Dr. Sine walked over to grab Jonathan's chart and pull the MRI negatives from his file and put them up on the backlit X-Ray holder.

"Jonathan, these are the results of your MRI we took this morning. We know why you've been getting these headaches, migranes if you will. Do you see this part of your brain?" pointing to the spot with his index finger, circling another dark spot. "This here, this mass of tissue is a tumor." The good doctor didn't have too much emotion in his voice. He had long ago forgotten that patients were people. Living, breathing, emotional people. "Its about an two and a half centimeteres in diameter, unfortunately its pushing on a part of the brain that there is little we can do about...I'm sorry"

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Jonathan sat in the hospital bed starring out the window. It had been two weeks since Dr. Sine had told him the news. He couldn't believe that life would end for him in about 18 months. He always thought it would be great to know how long you had to live, but now that he knew how much little time he had left, it wasn't so great. Sarah had come to visit him quite often. She often came in her supermarket cashiers uniform. Jonathan really had no other family, and Sarah new that.

Dr. Sine came in to check on Jonathan every few hours. Over the past two weeks he had at least 3 more MRI's. Each showing no change in size to the tumor. Which was generally a good sign, but the fact of the matter was, he had a tumor, and it was killing him.

Within the doctors circle of friends was an Army Colonel. The Colonel was director of a project within in the confines of the goverment authority. He couldn't of course divulge too much information to his friend, but he very much wanted to meet with the young patient with the tumor. Colonel Jacobs would be extending an offer to try and reverse the effects of the tumor. Of course the experiment, was just that an experiment. Jonathan would be compensated for his trials, for his tribulations.

Colonel Jacobs extended the offer of perhaps a new life to Jonathan. He gave him the gist of what was to happen, a piece of a brain would be taken from a donor, and placed instead in his, ridding his body of the tumor, but also with a big piece of his long term memory. He would most likely loose all images of his past.

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Jonathan was moved to a housing complex just outside of Chicago. He left his job, his apartment....Sarah. The houses were on government land, a military base to be exact. It gave the doctors easy accessibility to the subjects. The houses were minimal but with enough amenities to keep those being experimented on happy. Satellite TV, video games if they so choose, books, access to exercise equipment, but they were not allowed to leave the property. Not without prior conscent from the director.

Jonathan's migranes grew slowly, steadily worse as the days progressed. The doctors on base noted the condition and situations daily. Hourly. He was expected to see a psychiatrist before the actual surgery. Jonathan was driven from his housing barracks to the psychiatrists office. It wasn't far, but it was the first time Jonathan was allowed off premises since he'd gotten there.

The appointment began promptly at 9, and he arrived fifteen minutes early. Sitting out in the waiting room he smiled at the receptionist, sitting, waiting, hoping an episode didn't plague the morning. She sat there typing away until nine o'clock, at which point she lead him into the office.

 

[Sinful_whispers]

Lillian answered the buzzer as Stella informed her that her 9 AM was there and waiting for her, Lillian pressed the red button and asked Stella to show him in. Taking a deep breath she felt nervous in a way, which was a new feeling to her. Perhaps due to the seriousness of the case is why, she wasn’t really sure. Both hands moved along her jacket as she smoothed it out, and then along her thighs giving her semi- short skirt a final once over as she picked a small piece of fuzz from it. The door to her office opened and Lillian lifted her head to see her first patient and then stood. She walked from behind her desk and offered her hand in greeting to the man she will know as Jonathan case #1, as she didn’t consider the man she visited in prison number 1. “Jonathan it’s a pleasure, please call me Dr. Lillian. I prefer first name basis with my clientele.”

Her fingers were pressed together lightly as he moved his own around hers as she felt the moistness within his hand as they shook. “I promise that I don’t bite so there isn’t a need to be nervous, please have a seat either on the couch or in a chair I’ll leave that option to you. I will say this, most patients feel more at ease on the couch, I know typical as you see in most movies but it allows them to relax in a semi laying down position.”

Lillian nodded to Stella and watched the door close behind her as she turned and went back to her own part of the office to finish up Dr, Lillian’s report on Mr. Dawson. Once the door was closed Lillian took her seat behind her desk and gave him a once over while he choose a place to get comfortable. “Jonathan Lets get to know each other a bit. We will be as Dr. and patient for a long while from what I understand. You have chosen to undergo an operation that is extremely difficult in order to remove a brain tumor. Please correct me if I’m wrong at any point. Apparently your home Doctor has given you approximately three years if you don’t have it removed, which is where the military stepped in and offered you a chance to a full life.”

She reached for and curled her fingers around the glass before her and took a sip of water then placed the glass back down as she flipped the page of her notes. “It says you are unmarried, left your job, or have you just taken a leave of absence?”

She awaited him to answer and then continued on with her questioning. “Says you are a healthy male, you don’t drink excessively nor do you smoke, which is a good thing as well. Not good for you on either account. You started with headaches which progressively grew worse to the point of causing you to almost black out. You have never been married and were quite the dedicated worker. How was it as a choice to up and leave everything you worked hard for, home, job as well as your girlfriend Sarah? Regretting any decisions you have made this far? You do know you have the right to change your mind and not go through with this operation?”

Lillian placed the end of the pen to her lips as she moved it back and forth across them slowly, letting her lips part she slipped the tip of her tongue out and around it as she drew a bit within her mouth and swirled the end subconsciously. She drew it into her mouth and suckled it for a few moments and then slipped it back out as she turned in her chair and leaned back taking a look out the window. Not looking directly at him she began to question his a bit more only this time it was real personal. “How was your love life with Sarah as well as your sex life Jonathan? Have there ever been any problems there in either of those areas? I know it’s a bit personal to ask but we will be delving into ever aspect of your life up to the point you have the transplant and then afterwards until they seem that you are able to function 100% back into society with out any problems arising. Jonathan are you ready for all of this? Have you sat and seriously thought about all the chances you are taking and the severity of it all? I’m not here to change your mind I’m here to make sure you know and believe what you’re doing, the risks you’re going to take.”

Lillian took to him as she crossed her legs. Feeling her knees join like two perfect puzzle piece. She could feel her stiletto pump slip from her heel and dangle from her toes as she leaned back in her high back black leather chair a bit more, feeling the pen once again move across her lips as she awaits his answer. She looked over his face trying to read him, his mood, body language seeing if he felt comfortable around her right from the start which was important between patient and Doctor.