Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
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- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN FOR WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
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Lost in Illinois....(bondage virgin)
- Thread starter Soulfiregirl
- Start date
John Shadow
Experienced
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2003
- Posts
- 60
Welcome to Lit.
This is a great place to explore ideas and meet people. And by all means explore. Being new to bondage there is a lot to learn, not least of all about yourself. What interests you? What excites you? What sends a little shiver up your spine? And I don't just mean the trappings. From where do you desires spring? That inner journey can take a lifetime in itself. But it is much more enjoyable to travel in good company. Therefore, read, chat and feel free to ask for the opinions of others, but always be guided by your own common sense. Be cautious. Take it all at your own speed. And when you meet someone in the real world with whom you want to share these interests, take the time to get to know that person very well first. Mutual understanding, trust and respect are essential amongst travellers.
This is a great place to explore ideas and meet people. And by all means explore. Being new to bondage there is a lot to learn, not least of all about yourself. What interests you? What excites you? What sends a little shiver up your spine? And I don't just mean the trappings. From where do you desires spring? That inner journey can take a lifetime in itself. But it is much more enjoyable to travel in good company. Therefore, read, chat and feel free to ask for the opinions of others, but always be guided by your own common sense. Be cautious. Take it all at your own speed. And when you meet someone in the real world with whom you want to share these interests, take the time to get to know that person very well first. Mutual understanding, trust and respect are essential amongst travellers.
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
First, let me just say that I've gotten several responses to my thread already in PM's so I apologize to those of you who've contacted me by PM if it takes me a bit to reply back. (I was actually kind of surprised that I got any responses at all, so I'm flattered)
I'm not really sure what all I'm into yet because I haven't experienced anything. I just daydream a lot about things I'd like to do with someone. I'm not really into S&M. But this is what I wonder about S&M. Does it always go hand in hand with D&S? Because that seems to be what I'm seeing. I notice that people interested in bondage also seem to be into pain to a certain degree. I'm not really into pain. Spanking and things like that are ok but I'm a little confused as to the relationship between S&M and D&S or B&D.
I am really only interested in bondage alone. (well, I guess I wouldn't make a very good dominatrix then afterall) I'm interested in someone having control over me in the bedroom to a certain degree by restraining me. And I'd also like to do it to them. Or, if I ever get brave enough, one day I meet a couple and we take turns "controlling" or "binding" each other up. I don't know why I'm so turned on by the damsel in distress tied up kind of deal, but I am. Or a strong woman like B movie goddess Julie Strain done up in leather walking around with a man on a leash in a leather collar.....pardon me if I sound silly, but that's so dern hot.
I like leather and some form of "restraint" I guess you could say. But I don't want to be experiencing pain while restrained. Nor do I really want to inflict any kind of pain on somone I'd be restraining. (again, spanking and things like that are ok) I like the idea of being "cocooned" in some kind of bindings. I don't know. Maybe I should just go into therapy instead. *giggle*
(and again, thankyou to everyone who's sent me a PM so far...I'll reply as soon as I can, but sometimes it can take me a few days)
I'm not really sure what all I'm into yet because I haven't experienced anything. I just daydream a lot about things I'd like to do with someone. I'm not really into S&M. But this is what I wonder about S&M. Does it always go hand in hand with D&S? Because that seems to be what I'm seeing. I notice that people interested in bondage also seem to be into pain to a certain degree. I'm not really into pain. Spanking and things like that are ok but I'm a little confused as to the relationship between S&M and D&S or B&D.
I am really only interested in bondage alone. (well, I guess I wouldn't make a very good dominatrix then afterall) I'm interested in someone having control over me in the bedroom to a certain degree by restraining me. And I'd also like to do it to them. Or, if I ever get brave enough, one day I meet a couple and we take turns "controlling" or "binding" each other up. I don't know why I'm so turned on by the damsel in distress tied up kind of deal, but I am. Or a strong woman like B movie goddess Julie Strain done up in leather walking around with a man on a leash in a leather collar.....pardon me if I sound silly, but that's so dern hot.
I like leather and some form of "restraint" I guess you could say. But I don't want to be experiencing pain while restrained. Nor do I really want to inflict any kind of pain on somone I'd be restraining. (again, spanking and things like that are ok) I like the idea of being "cocooned" in some kind of bindings. I don't know. Maybe I should just go into therapy instead. *giggle*
(and again, thankyou to everyone who's sent me a PM so far...I'll reply as soon as I can, but sometimes it can take me a few days)
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN TO SEE WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
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Darrell Weller
Virgin
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2004
- Posts
- 2
Hello Soulfiregirl
Hi there, bondage virgin. I'm a dom well versed in the art and subtleties of loving restraint, emphasis on the loving because that's what it's all about, using restraint to take two lovers deep into intimacy and nurturing. I'm a WM, 55, professional, in San Francisco, which is very kinky town if you know where to go. Write if you want a conversation...and possibly more. *******
Personal information removed by Moderator
Hi there, bondage virgin. I'm a dom well versed in the art and subtleties of loving restraint, emphasis on the loving because that's what it's all about, using restraint to take two lovers deep into intimacy and nurturing. I'm a WM, 55, professional, in San Francisco, which is very kinky town if you know where to go. Write if you want a conversation...and possibly more. *******
Personal information removed by Moderator
Last edited by a moderator:
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN TO SEE WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
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MasochisticToy
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2005
- Posts
- 110
Welcome to Lit Soulfire
I posted on your thread in the BDSM forum as well, but figured I'd reply here as well.
I, too, live in Illinois. Sycamore, to be exact. I am 27 and a bisexual submissive masochist. I am new to Sycamore, but have lived in Illinois for over two years now.
The sad thing is, being an adult who is not in college (and who does not care for the bar scene much) I really have no friends. Other than online that is. And I crave "real life" friends. Ultimately, I'd prefer friends who share some of the same interests as I so I can freely be myself.
I've noticed in this "ad" you're mostly looking for pen-pals right now, which I think is great. And if you're anywhere close to Sycamore, perhaps we could even meet one day.
Feel free to respond here, on your ad, or to E-mail or PM me.
~Toy
I posted on your thread in the BDSM forum as well, but figured I'd reply here as well.
I, too, live in Illinois. Sycamore, to be exact. I am 27 and a bisexual submissive masochist. I am new to Sycamore, but have lived in Illinois for over two years now.
The sad thing is, being an adult who is not in college (and who does not care for the bar scene much) I really have no friends. Other than online that is. And I crave "real life" friends. Ultimately, I'd prefer friends who share some of the same interests as I so I can freely be myself.
I've noticed in this "ad" you're mostly looking for pen-pals right now, which I think is great. And if you're anywhere close to Sycamore, perhaps we could even meet one day.
Feel free to respond here, on your ad, or to E-mail or PM me.
~Toy
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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Re: Welcome to Lit Soulfire
Sweetie, I have no idea where Sycamore is so that must mean that's it's far from me. (sorry) But, you are more then welcome to PM me anytime to chat. I have no problem with that. I saw your post in my other thread. Thankyou. I'm more of a loner too but it's been by choice. I'm a little "out there" sometimes and it takes all my effort to act "normal" around other people sometimes. LOL. Actually, once I get to know people I'm very friendly and dare I say...even funny. I have a good sense of humor. But I tend to be more shy at first. It can take me a long time to warm up to people. I'm not into the bar scene either. It is hard to meet people our age when we're not in school anymore. Everyone our age is either married or dating someone and they hang out with their own group of friends.
But take heart MT. The people who will be your true friends will accept you no matter what. You have friends here. You're not alone. Remember that.
*hug*
(do you have any other hobbies? You could join a group or something involving your other interests perhaps?)
MasochisticToy said:I posted on your thread in the BDSM forum as well, but figured I'd reply here as well.
I, too, live in Illinois. Sycamore, to be exact. I am 27 and a bisexual submissive masochist. I am new to Sycamore, but have lived in Illinois for over two years now.
The sad thing is, being an adult who is not in college (and who does not care for the bar scene much) I really have no friends. Other than online that is. And I crave "real life" friends. Ultimately, I'd prefer friends who share some of the same interests as I so I can freely be myself.
I've noticed in this "ad" you're mostly looking for pen-pals right now, which I think is great. And if you're anywhere close to Sycamore, perhaps we could even meet one day.
Feel free to respond here, on your ad, or to E-mail or PM me.
~Toy
Sweetie, I have no idea where Sycamore is so that must mean that's it's far from me. (sorry) But, you are more then welcome to PM me anytime to chat. I have no problem with that. I saw your post in my other thread. Thankyou. I'm more of a loner too but it's been by choice. I'm a little "out there" sometimes and it takes all my effort to act "normal" around other people sometimes. LOL. Actually, once I get to know people I'm very friendly and dare I say...even funny. I have a good sense of humor. But I tend to be more shy at first. It can take me a long time to warm up to people. I'm not into the bar scene either. It is hard to meet people our age when we're not in school anymore. Everyone our age is either married or dating someone and they hang out with their own group of friends.
But take heart MT. The people who will be your true friends will accept you no matter what. You have friends here. You're not alone. Remember that.
*hug*
(do you have any other hobbies? You could join a group or something involving your other interests perhaps?)
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
Ok, sorry for the rant but I feel I need to post this. I am actually glad I posted an ad in the personals section because it's been a most interesting quick learning tool for me. I have learned very quickly how to "narrow down" the field of who's PM'ing me.
For those of you who are PM'ing me regularly, this post is not meant for you. (you guys are fine...no worries)
This post is mean for the "experts" who keep PM'ing me. Or the ones claming to be experts or "doms" and come accross as a bit forceful as far as wanting to "teach" me things. You need to check your egos at the door because I'm not taking the bait. I'm pretty intuitive about people and I figure out people very quickly. Even by the way they type things. I've gotten a few PM's from members claiming that they know this and that and are willing to teach me (like I'm supposed to be so greatful or something) and their tone is a bit "demanding" right off the bat. "Email me now...I want to get to know you now...etc, etc..."
Now, the thing is, once I reply and tell them I'm only interested in pen-pals for now, it's funny to see that NONE of them reply back. That tells me very quickly that these are the cocky, arrogant "gamers". They're not looking to mentor anyone. They are looking to "use".
So, a little word of advice for you supposed "experts" out there, I may sound a bit nieve in my posts but I'm an old hand when it comes to figuring out people. I can spot you guys from a MILE away. I may sound submissive but I have a very strong part of my personality as well. So, if you come on too strong right away in a PM to me claiming to be an "expert", guess what, that sounds arrogant to me and it's an immediate turnoff. I will happily send you on your way. Go "play" someone else.
A true Dom to me is not arrogant or cocky. A true dom does not brag about their supposed expert knowledge. I have read posts on this board from "true doms" and they are not PM'ing me with their "expert" knowledge. If anything, the true doms on here are respectful, subtle, kind, knowledgeble, wise, and give very good advice on how to avoid you other "experts".
So, if you're a true Dom, you're not going to hit me in the stomach with a PM. You're going to knock me over with a feather....not a sledgehammer.
I'm just putting this out there because while I've heard from some wonderful people.....a few weasels have tried to burrow their way into my hole. And my hole is "closed" to those PM's. Period.
Thankyou kitties.....you may proceed.....
Now, as for the rest of ya, PM me all you want. (like I said, I've met some sweethearts on here...and you all know who you are...I hope)
For those of you who are PM'ing me regularly, this post is not meant for you. (you guys are fine...no worries)
This post is mean for the "experts" who keep PM'ing me. Or the ones claming to be experts or "doms" and come accross as a bit forceful as far as wanting to "teach" me things. You need to check your egos at the door because I'm not taking the bait. I'm pretty intuitive about people and I figure out people very quickly. Even by the way they type things. I've gotten a few PM's from members claiming that they know this and that and are willing to teach me (like I'm supposed to be so greatful or something) and their tone is a bit "demanding" right off the bat. "Email me now...I want to get to know you now...etc, etc..."
Now, the thing is, once I reply and tell them I'm only interested in pen-pals for now, it's funny to see that NONE of them reply back. That tells me very quickly that these are the cocky, arrogant "gamers". They're not looking to mentor anyone. They are looking to "use".
So, a little word of advice for you supposed "experts" out there, I may sound a bit nieve in my posts but I'm an old hand when it comes to figuring out people. I can spot you guys from a MILE away. I may sound submissive but I have a very strong part of my personality as well. So, if you come on too strong right away in a PM to me claiming to be an "expert", guess what, that sounds arrogant to me and it's an immediate turnoff. I will happily send you on your way. Go "play" someone else.
A true Dom to me is not arrogant or cocky. A true dom does not brag about their supposed expert knowledge. I have read posts on this board from "true doms" and they are not PM'ing me with their "expert" knowledge. If anything, the true doms on here are respectful, subtle, kind, knowledgeble, wise, and give very good advice on how to avoid you other "experts".
So, if you're a true Dom, you're not going to hit me in the stomach with a PM. You're going to knock me over with a feather....not a sledgehammer.
I'm just putting this out there because while I've heard from some wonderful people.....a few weasels have tried to burrow their way into my hole. And my hole is "closed" to those PM's. Period.
Thankyou kitties.....you may proceed.....
Now, as for the rest of ya, PM me all you want. (like I said, I've met some sweethearts on here...and you all know who you are...I hope)
MasochisticToy
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2005
- Posts
- 110
That was very well said, and it's refreshing to see that the "experts" haven't taken advantage of you!
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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- Posts
- 1,338
- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN TO SEE WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
Last edited:
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
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Not into pain. (at this time anyway) I don't mind the nipples being twisted or pinched as long as it's done GENTLY. Just wanted to clarify. lol.
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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- Posts
- 1,338
Throwing ashtrays...that sounds interesting. lol.
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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I'd better post this too. I've been getting asked a lot in PM's if I have any of the Instant Messenger thingys. Sadly, I don't. They clobber my ancient computer. (and we're talking old people....at least eight years old)
So, I have no Yahoo Messenger,
no AOL Instant Messenger,
and no MSN Messenger.
I don't have any other "chat" program available to use either. Needless to say, my computer sucks. lol.
Just wanted to let everyone know. (sorry....for now I can only do the PM or email thing)
Thankee!
So, I have no Yahoo Messenger,
no AOL Instant Messenger,
and no MSN Messenger.
I don't have any other "chat" program available to use either. Needless to say, my computer sucks. lol.
Just wanted to let everyone know. (sorry....for now I can only do the PM or email thing)
Thankee!
Calvin
Adolf's gone away...
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2000
- Posts
- 2,916
Soulfiregirl said:Ok, sorry for the rant but I feel I need to post this. I am actually glad I posted an ad in the personals section because it's been a most interesting quick learning tool for me. I have learned very quickly how to "narrow down" the field of who's PM'ing me.
For those of you who are PM'ing me regularly, this post is not meant for you. (you guys are fine...no worries)
This post is mean for the "experts" who keep PM'ing me. Or the ones claming to be experts or "doms" and come accross as a bit forceful as far as wanting to "teach" me things. You need to check your egos at the door because I'm not taking the bait. I'm pretty intuitive about people and I figure out people very quickly. Even by the way they type things. I've gotten a few PM's from members claiming that they know this and that and are willing to teach me (like I'm supposed to be so greatful or something) and their tone is a bit "demanding" right off the bat. "Email me now...I want to get to know you now...etc, etc..."
Now, the thing is, once I reply and tell them I'm only interested in pen-pals for now, it's funny to see that NONE of them reply back. That tells me very quickly that these are the cocky, arrogant "gamers". They're not looking to mentor anyone. They are looking to "use".
So, a little word of advice for you supposed "experts" out there, I may sound a bit nieve in my posts but I'm an old hand when it comes to figuring out people. I can spot you guys from a MILE away. I may sound submissive but I have a very strong part of my personality as well. So, if you come on too strong right away in a PM to me claiming to be an "expert", guess what, that sounds arrogant to me and it's an immediate turnoff. I will happily send you on your way. Go "play" someone else.
A true Dom to me is not arrogant or cocky. A true dom does not brag about their supposed expert knowledge. I have read posts on this board from "true doms" and they are not PM'ing me with their "expert" knowledge. If anything, the true doms on here are respectful, subtle, kind, knowledgeble, wise, and give very good advice on how to avoid you other "experts".
So, if you're a true Dom, you're not going to hit me in the stomach with a PM. You're going to knock me over with a feather....not a sledgehammer.
I'm just putting this out there because while I've heard from some wonderful people.....a few weasels have tried to burrow their way into my hole. And my hole is "closed" to those PM's. Period.
Thankyou kitties.....you may proceed.....
Now, as for the rest of ya, PM me all you want. (like I said, I've met some sweethearts on here...and you all know who you are...I hope)
very well said my lady... wish you were in Oregon....
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
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- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN TO SEE WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
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Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
- EDITED - READ FURTHER DOWN TO SEE WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.
Last edited:
on meeting people
it is nice to see a person finding success (so far) at posting personals. well i say that because this is one of the first i ever fully read. and as a person who shares the similar bondage fetishes it makes me feel better that maybe my interest in this can be successful also. too bad i live in southern cook county else i would think about replying to your ad in the Chicago Reader. Well anyways best of luck.
"So far, so nothing"
it is nice to see a person finding success (so far) at posting personals. well i say that because this is one of the first i ever fully read. and as a person who shares the similar bondage fetishes it makes me feel better that maybe my interest in this can be successful also. too bad i live in southern cook county else i would think about replying to your ad in the Chicago Reader. Well anyways best of luck.
"So far, so nothing"
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
Re: on meeting people
Keep trying wookim. You'll find somone. I haven't met anyone in person yet myself. The problem with ads on the Internet is you've got to keep "tweeking" them sometimes and be REALLY specific as to what you're looking for. I had to go back and add more info to my Chicago Reader ad several times because I kept getting replies from men who were married or twenty years older then me. (and I'm not looking for that) I also had to put in my ad that I'm looking to meet a men OR a woman. (but so far, only men have repsonded...go figure...lol)
It can be frustrating but I find that if it takes me longer to meet someone in person because I have to take time to "narrow down" the field, then so be it. It's worth it to me to meet the RIGHT person for me. And, as you guys know, there are psychopaths and dangerous predators on personal sites so you have to learn to "weed through" them too. Someone sending you a reply to your ad could "sound" lovely when in reality they've got bodies buried under their house. So my advice is whatever you do, BE CAREFULL.
That's why I started off as just pen-pals first. I needed to learn the lingo a little better and learn how to "spot" fakers right away. As much as I want to meet someone, I don't want to risk meeting someone dangerous. So, I that's why I keep updating this ad as well. So stay safe and keep trying sweetie. You'll meet someone. You just need to be patient. It will be worth it. That's what I'm doing. Being careful and not being impulsive and "jumping" at the first chance to meet someone who replies.
wookim said:
Keep trying wookim. You'll find somone. I haven't met anyone in person yet myself. The problem with ads on the Internet is you've got to keep "tweeking" them sometimes and be REALLY specific as to what you're looking for. I had to go back and add more info to my Chicago Reader ad several times because I kept getting replies from men who were married or twenty years older then me. (and I'm not looking for that) I also had to put in my ad that I'm looking to meet a men OR a woman. (but so far, only men have repsonded...go figure...lol)
It can be frustrating but I find that if it takes me longer to meet someone in person because I have to take time to "narrow down" the field, then so be it. It's worth it to me to meet the RIGHT person for me. And, as you guys know, there are psychopaths and dangerous predators on personal sites so you have to learn to "weed through" them too. Someone sending you a reply to your ad could "sound" lovely when in reality they've got bodies buried under their house. So my advice is whatever you do, BE CAREFULL.
That's why I started off as just pen-pals first. I needed to learn the lingo a little better and learn how to "spot" fakers right away. As much as I want to meet someone, I don't want to risk meeting someone dangerous. So, I that's why I keep updating this ad as well. So stay safe and keep trying sweetie. You'll meet someone. You just need to be patient. It will be worth it. That's what I'm doing. Being careful and not being impulsive and "jumping" at the first chance to meet someone who replies.
Soulfiregirl
The Bisexual Bandit
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Posts
- 1,338
ANOTHER ANNOYING RAMBLING LONGWINDED UPDATE: (Hey, I'm bipolar...cut me some slack...heh)
I GUESS I DIDN'T SPECIFY THIS BEFORE.
WOMEN ARE WELCOME TO REPLY TO THIS AD AS WELL. I'M BISEXUAL.
ME LIKEY GIRLS TOO.
I GUESS I DIDN'T SPECIFY THIS BEFORE.
WOMEN ARE WELCOME TO REPLY TO THIS AD AS WELL. I'M BISEXUAL.
ME LIKEY GIRLS TOO.
sub_master
Virgin
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2005
- Posts
- 3
pen pal
If your still seeking a pen pal to help you explore I would gladly offer my services of course we would have to find if we are a fit but if you want to hit me back pm or the other ways I have listed in my profile
If your still seeking a pen pal to help you explore I would gladly offer my services of course we would have to find if we are a fit but if you want to hit me back pm or the other ways I have listed in my profile
BigAndTall
goodbye
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2003
- Posts
- 3,352
Soulfiregirl said:Oh, and one more thing, I forgot to mention my age. Not sure if it matters much but I'm 30.
Just kind of looking for pen-pals right now I guess since I'm new to all of this. As I learn more from all of you, maybe I'll get up the nerve to one day meet someone face to face.
Anyway, thanks again.
30 better not be old
If so I am even worse and I don't want to be old. Oh, and hey there. Didn't think it well just to say one line and run.
Er, well thats 2 I guess I could ramble and make it 3 or more but think I should stop here.
Can always use a good tease.
I don't mind a big "tease" at all. Especially if you "tease" the right parts. How about PMing me and lets get something going.
Soulfiregirl said:I try. lol. Although, not sure what good this ad is really doing me since I'm only doing the pen-pal thing for now. Guess I'm just a big "tease".
I don't mind a big "tease" at all. Especially if you "tease" the right parts. How about PMing me and lets get something going.
