U
- Joined
- Dec 30, 2005
- Posts
- 201
Intriguing variant...
...on the traditional mad scientist story.
The introduction is a bit tepid, mind, and probably unnecessary. You could just use your ability with dialogue to set the scene.
The conclusion is also rather hackneyed and lets the tale down to a degree.
There are several rather clicheed exchanges midway through, but you do have a gift for good dialogue and description.
Keep writing.
M
...on the traditional mad scientist story.
The introduction is a bit tepid, mind, and probably unnecessary. You could just use your ability with dialogue to set the scene.
The conclusion is also rather hackneyed and lets the tale down to a degree.
There are several rather clicheed exchanges midway through, but you do have a gift for good dialogue and description.
Keep writing.
M
U
