Looking for friendship

[BeautifulBlueSky218]

Right now I'm going through a really tough time in my life. I'm looking for a friendship. I made one before but today is a very hard day for me.

I lost a boyfriend who I loved in my past. He was 26 years old and he overdosed on Crystal Meth. Still to this day I'm blaming myself for his death sometimes....

I just need to chat to people and distract my mind from thinking about it. I'm sure I'll get some negative comments to this thread. I just seriously need people to talk too. I'm tired of this pain and I just hope someone can make me laugh and talk about hobbies, etc.

Anniversary dates are hard and I can't deal with it today. I've been having a stressful week because I knew this day was coming up....

As an request please: I'd really like to chat with younger men please. Younger than my age. I'm 33 years old and I'd really like to talk to some younger men. I've always had an attraction for them and a lot of people give me a hard time about it. Especially my parents. This would seriously make me smile today. I hope it's not too much to ask. I'm just having such a hard day.

 

[aussiesoldier84]

Hey, check your inbox

 

[ArthurW]

Any time you want to chat let me know. We can chat anything you want. You can even vent your anger. No judgement made. If you were closer we sit and chat don't worry I won't hit on you. I have been through what you are going through with many friends.

 

[Silentrorr]

Although I don't qualify I wanted to send you hugs anyway. Anniversaries will always be difficult but in time they will ease. Maybe never fully but they will.

(shoot me a pm if you ever need a listening ear)

 

[m_i7_]

Get a kik account

It's what the cool "younger" kids use

 

[BeautifulBlueSky218]

Thanks everyone. This means a lot to me. I do have a kik account and talk on there. I really could use a friend to talk too. I won't drain you with my problems. Honestly hate putting all my baggage on people because I know other people have their own issues to deal with. People can only do so much. Just be understanding if I have a horrible day or anything, I may need some time to relax for the day because anytime I'm upset I noticed I get very angry and upset. Believe this is part of griefing and from what I learned from others who are also going through something similar that I've been through.

From what I know my old boyfriend has a horrible childhood and went through a lot. He got bullied horribly. Especially at High School. I've learned that many people who have PTSD end up turning to drugs to numb their pain. Please if you're addicted to a drug or anything, please get help. You can turn your life around and be a happier person. I lost my future husband to crystal meth. Sometimes I had no idea where he was and other times he ran off for a few days to get his next fix. In the end he felt horrible because he let me down and continued to use it more. This is something eventually I'm going to move past from and heal from. I don't expect anyone to try to save me. All I simply want is someone to talk too: plain and simple. I just need to smile and laugh again. It'll seriously distract my mind from thinking.

At the moment I'm seeking help from griefing and hopefully one day I'll put all this behind me. Everyone grieves differently. And please don't pity me. If there's one thing I hate is pity. The reason I responded to this is because I don't want someone else going through the same thing or losing someone they love.

Thank you for listening.

~Beautiful Blue Sky

 

[norwaygirl]

it's a beautiful human story, not "baggage"

 

[ratherabsurd1]

There is no baggage. Wanting to bear others burdens is part of the human experience and the ones that can do that for others are amazing people.