Looking for feedback

[MeHereHi]

Hi there, I've recently posted my first erotic story and am really wanting some feedback on it, like if it was good or bad, what parts were good or bad, how the writing style is, where the story could go next ect ect. The story's called "The Girl Kneeling in the Foyer." If you can't find it when searching for it go on my profile and onto stories and you'll find it there, please and thank you

Me

 

[Saint Peter]

Sucks.

 

[Lancecastor]

I liked the part where she was kneeling in the foyer.

 

[Vagina_Dentata]

Hi there, I've recently posted my first erotic story and am really wanting some feedback on it, like if it was good or bad, what parts were good or bad, how the writing style is, where the story could go next ect ect. The story's called "The Girl Kneeling in the Foyer." If you can't find it when searching for it go on my profile and onto stories and you'll find it there, please and thank you

Me

It was good or bad.

 

[Lancecastor]

If you want feedback, i would recommend you get your hands on a Marshall tube half stack and a Les Paul with dirty fingers pickups.

 

[BabblingBrooke]

If you want people on the forums to read it, you should put a link in this profile, too. The title isn't compelling enough for me to go search for it.

 

[Lancecastor]

If you want people on the forums to read it, you should put a link in this profile, too. The title isn't compelling enough for me to go search for it.

It's a dirty story of a dirty man and his clinging wife doesn't understand.

 

[Hypoxia]

You'll get nothing but snark and dogshit here.

Post your request on the Story Feedback forum, with a link.

Now leave the General Board and don't return without a cultivated attitude.

 

[imalickin]

You might want to try the feedback forum...it will be a little more responsive than here.

http://forum.literotica.com/forumdisplay.php?f=1

 

[Lancecastor]

Lots of Lit's really awful "writers"post regularly on the GB, so you folks should be giving this noob a fair shake.

I liked the part where the character on its knees in the foyer was a girl.

That whole boys on their knees in the foyer thing doesn't do it for me.

No offence to those here who luk that sort of thing.