destinie21
Daddy's Brat
- Joined
- May 27, 2003
- Posts
- 3,612
Look
- Thread starter destinie21
- Start date
MrBates
Professor Perv
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2001
- Posts
- 2,114
Very Nice
A wonderful story; although I did see one word misspelled. I will certainly NOT hold that against you!
I do like the plot; however, I think I should go read the first two chapters.
I enjoy your descriptions. You either have a very vivid imagination; or you speak well from experience.
One comment though; if Madison is supposed to be the bitch, she certainly isn't coming across like one in this chapter.
A wonderful story; although I did see one word misspelled. I will certainly NOT hold that against you!
I do like the plot; however, I think I should go read the first two chapters.
I enjoy your descriptions. You either have a very vivid imagination; or you speak well from experience.
One comment though; if Madison is supposed to be the bitch, she certainly isn't coming across like one in this chapter.
destinie21
Daddy's Brat
- Joined
- May 27, 2003
- Posts
- 3,612
thanks for the feedback.
madison was the bitch in the previous chapters but now she's changed, I had to keep the same title so that the readers who enjoyed the first part would know that the second and third parts were a continuation
madison was the bitch in the previous chapters but now she's changed, I had to keep the same title so that the readers who enjoyed the first part would know that the second and third parts were a continuation
d21 -
Well, chapter 3 is sex...pure sex.
I had been anxious for the next installment to see where these characters went. They did change, but now neither of them are bitches. I miss that.
And I miss the friction between them, the semi-public nature of their escapades, their deliberate rebeliousness, and their power struggle. That they stopped to think about where to park the car detracts from their passion. That Corrin was concerned for the closed bedroom door in the empty house shows more regard to the management of their passion than the fulfillment of it.
This chapter shows them both conceeding to the passion of raw sex. I think that's great. Two bitches in heat! But, to be true to each of their characters they should not necessarily conceed to each other's will. Has Corrin forgotten how Madison intentionally embarrased her in class...has Madison forgotten Corrin's insolence?
This fight for control continues well with Madison helping herself to the Martini early in the story. Corrin responds true to form, but then nothing else comes of it.
The paragraph about handing off the keys for the garage door opener was a bit choppy - you may want to reread it for yourself.
What ever happend to Corrin's friends?
Thanks for the sexy strory.
requerdos
Well, chapter 3 is sex...pure sex.
I had been anxious for the next installment to see where these characters went. They did change, but now neither of them are bitches. I miss that.
And I miss the friction between them, the semi-public nature of their escapades, their deliberate rebeliousness, and their power struggle. That they stopped to think about where to park the car detracts from their passion. That Corrin was concerned for the closed bedroom door in the empty house shows more regard to the management of their passion than the fulfillment of it.
This chapter shows them both conceeding to the passion of raw sex. I think that's great. Two bitches in heat! But, to be true to each of their characters they should not necessarily conceed to each other's will. Has Corrin forgotten how Madison intentionally embarrased her in class...has Madison forgotten Corrin's insolence?
This fight for control continues well with Madison helping herself to the Martini early in the story. Corrin responds true to form, but then nothing else comes of it.
The paragraph about handing off the keys for the garage door opener was a bit choppy - you may want to reread it for yourself.
What ever happend to Corrin's friends?
Thanks for the sexy strory.
requerdos
