Litiquette VII

My ability to provide high quality sex to my partner is:

  • I am without a doubt the highest quality sex partner there is. I will make you cum and I will cum, a

    Votes: 54 25.2%
  • I have more kinks than most, nothing inappropriate but you’ll be shocked at what I like

    Votes: 107 50.0%
  • I’m good. I get the job done, not much flair but there’ll be no need for masturbation after

    Votes: 46 21.5%
  • I mostly provide sex as a service. I’ve never really enjoyed it so I won’t seek it out, but when ask

    Votes: 1 0.5%
  • I’m as vanilla as it gets. I hope you have a great imagination, you’ll likely need it to keep things

    Votes: 6 2.8%

  • Total voters
    214
Alcohol also does nothing for me, tastes like crap... Why is it so hard to believe that, in my opinion, it tastes like liquid hell?
It is because they have tasted some alcoholic beverages that they find delicious. I'm sure they can get that someone thinks a hoppy IPA or a shot of straight bourbon tastes bad. Trying to say that a well-made margarita tastes disgusting is a harder sell. Maybe for you, alcohol is similar to how some people feel about cilantro.
 
I’ve never been one to follow the crowd. I considered myself one of the cool kids in a group by myself. Some people pronounced it “loser”—I assume they were just Canadian.

I guess booze and cigars would have to be my answer. There was a moment where smoking cigars was the thing to do and I decided to try it. And although I look super cool smoking a cigar, the gross taste of “I feel like I licked the bottom of a used medical dumpster” the next day was enough to not continue my Freudian pursuit of coolness.

Alcohol also does nothing for me, tastes like crap and doesn’t enhance my greatness in the least. So I’m the non-alcohol guy at the party that makes everyone super uncomfortable because they think I’m judging them or recovering. Why is it so hard to believe that, in my opinion, it tastes like liquid hell?

Anyway, being the outcast is my version of cool, even though there seems to be an outcast group now, so I might have to do what everyone else is doing in an effort to be a nonconformist. The world is so confusing.



this might be the best post I've read in ages. I laughed so hard, you are so whitty and I thank you for that.
 
My parent’s gave me one of those “March to the Beat of a Different Drummer” posters when I was about twelve. An attempt to reconcile themselves with my inability to fit in with my peers, I think. If only they’d realized my drummer had a squint, an overactive conscious, and a literal streak a mile wide. 😂


The only thing that comes to mind is the time I finally let myself be badgered into trying…ahem…a substance that is gaining legality in several states.

SICK FOR DAYS

Nauseated. Dizzy. Dehydrated. Mouth like a cotton ball. It completely eludes me how people can choose to partake.

Like, voluntarily.
Like, for fun.
Like…no. 🤢
 
< clipped for all kinds of brevity >

Let's see.

-Hysterically funny. Check
-Doubled up on the nice gene. Check
-Muscles. Check
-Talented and amusing writer. Check

That's it.

*eyes you suspiciously*

What faults are you hiding? I feel certain they are heinous. :p



(Serious about the words to paper. You should be publishing amusing essays!)
 
Quick one this morning.

Some of us can get a little crazy and jump on board on the wonder and hype of what all the cool kids are doing.

What was something you tried only because of the fear of missing out?
Like it, love it and want more or it?
Or hell no, never doing that again?

I haven't had the FOMO is a long time, but maybe because there hasn't been much to miss out on in a while.

I'd say usually it's something like a television show. I tried watching Game of Thrones a few times because everyone raved about it. Even gave it a real chance and watched a couple seasons, but it wasn't for me. I don't know if that's the type of thing you had in mind though, I can't really remember the last "leave my house" kind of thing I did just because I was afraid I'd miss out.
 
Anyway, being the outcast is my version of cool, even though there seems to be an outcast group now, so I might have to do what everyone else is doing in an effort to be a nonconformist. The world is so confusing.

Yeah, the outcast thing is not cool anymore. It has become mainstream. It's a bit like with the nerd thing. The normies has taken over. :rolleyes::D
 
Drive by Question!

Audio Books.

Do we love ‘em? Hate ‘em? More specifically how safe are they when driving? Do they act as a distraction or, in the case of those who might *ahem* wander mentally while driving, help one to focus?

Asking for a friend. ;)
 
I don’t do well with audio books; driving or otherwise.
My mind drifts and I suddenly realize that I haven’t been paying attention.
To be fair, this also happens when I’m reading. My brain jumps ahead in anticipation of what might happen next and when it doesn’t I start rewriting the story in my head and end up just looking at the words while thinking of a totally different story.
I may have focus issues. :cool:
 
Drive by Question!

Audio Books.

Do we love ‘em? Hate ‘em? More specifically how safe are they when driving? Do they act as a distraction or, in the case of those who might *ahem* wander mentally while driving, help one to focus?

Asking for a friend. ;)

I love audiobooks! Who are we kidding though. I love ALL books. I listen to them when I clean, when I walk dogs, and - yep - in the car. Back before COVID, I had a commute that was 45 minutes one way on a good day that was just bumped to bumper traffic. So I spent a lot of time inching up and then stop and then inching up and stop. So audiobooks were good to distract me from what likely angered others. But I can’t listen to an audiobook if I’m going somewhere new or unfamiliar. I tend to tune out the book to focus. So yeah, I can see how they’d be a distraction for many.
 
Drive by Question!

Audio Books.

Do we love ‘em? Hate ‘em? More specifically how safe are they when driving? Do they act as a distraction or, in the case of those who might *ahem* wander mentally while driving, help one to focus?

Asking for a friend. ;)

I don't like them. I'm like HW, my mind drifts and I realize that I haven’t been paying attention. This doesn't happen when I am reading it. I am fully immersed when I read the book, but I just can't follow if I am listening to an audiobook. The only time when I can really listen to it is when I'm cooking. But I'd rather listen to a podcast in that case.

I have only two authors in audiobook format as well.

The Silmarillion (Tolkien)
The Children of Húrin (Tolkien)
The Lord of the Rings (Tolkien)
A Song of Ice and Fire series (G.R.R. Martin)
 
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Drive by Question!

Audio Books.

Do we love ‘em? Hate ‘em? More specifically how safe are they when driving? Do they act as a distraction or, in the case of those who might *ahem* wander mentally while driving, help one to focus?

Asking for a friend. ;)

I don't have many. I get distracted more easily. But to me, if you enjoy radio/music. It is no different while you are driving. I listen to Podcasts a lot while I drive.
 
Thank you! What I am hearing is No to the audio and driving a distance, but possibly yes to Podcasts.

Not much of a podcast listener up to now, but I have listened to a few episode of the NoSleep and The H.P. Lovecraft Literary Podcasts. Both good. Both horror.

The Cryptonaturalist as well, but his voice is too soothing. I tried to ride on a trainer while listening to him once and nearly dozed off my bike. 😂


Any suggestions? I'll need to change it up to keep alert.
 
Thank you! What I am hearing is No to the audio and driving a distance, but possibly yes to Podcasts.

Not much of a podcast listener up to now, but I have listened to a few episode of the NoSleep and The H.P. Lovecraft Literary Podcasts. Both good. Both horror.

The Cryptonaturalist as well, but his voice is too soothing. I tried to ride on a trainer while listening to him once and nearly dozed off my bike. 😂


Any suggestions? I'll need to change it up to keep alert.

Dirty John. True story and it will leave thinking, wtf?
 
Thank you! What I am hearing is No to the audio and driving a distance, but possibly yes to Podcasts.

Not much of a podcast listener up to now, but I have listened to a few episode of the NoSleep and The H.P. Lovecraft Literary Podcasts. Both good. Both horror.

The Cryptonaturalist as well, but his voice is too soothing. I tried to ride on a trainer while listening to him once and nearly dozed off my bike. 😂


Any suggestions? I'll need to change it up to keep alert.

I'm still trying to find more good podcasts myself. But I agree. I like true crime. Not before bed though. :eek:
When I need a laugh. I listen to my favorite Radio Host and his "War of the Roses" "Prank phone calls" and "Dirty little secret" podcasts. He makes me laugh so much I swear I need diapers prior to listening.
 
I'm still trying to find more good podcasts myself. But I agree. I like true crime. Not before bed though. :eek:
When I need a laugh. I listen to my favorite Radio Host and his "War of the Roses" "Prank phone calls" and "Dirty little secret" podcasts. He makes me laugh so much I swear I need diapers prior to listening.

We listen to “On a dark cold night” at bedtime. It’s like goth fairytales told in the most soothing voice. It’s gotten to the point J just hears her voice and is out.
 
Dirty John. True story and it will leave thinking, wtf?

Awesome. :cool:

I'm still trying to find more good podcasts myself. But I agree. I like true crime. Not before bed though. :eek:
When I need a laugh. I listen to my favorite Radio Host and his "War of the Roses" "Prank phone calls" and "Dirty little secret" podcasts. He makes me laugh so much I swear I need diapers prior to listening.

I am pro laughing. :D

Is that one or three podcasts? I can't tell….
 
We listen to “On a dark cold night” at bedtime. It’s like goth fairytales told in the most soothing voice. It’s gotten to the point J just hears her voice and is out.

That's how the Cryptonaturalist hits me. Beautiful words and language, all rolled out like poetry in a voice like soothing syrup.

Wonderful, but certainly not while driving!
 
That's how the Cryptonaturalist hits me. Beautiful words and language, all rolled out like poetry in a voice like soothing syrup.

Wonderful, but certainly not while driving!

No, that is not what you want while driving. But I’m appreciative of the name of another podcast to check out. They are great since I have bouts of ungodly insomnia. This way I have something to listen to instead of getting engrossed in a book.

I can’t be in a car more than 45 minutes without getting tired. Dirty John got me the four hours to Ohio though.
 
No, that is not what you want while driving. But I’m appreciative of the name of another podcast to check out. They are great since I have bouts of ungodly insomnia. This way I have something to listen to instead of getting engrossed in a book.

I can’t be in a car more than 45 minutes without getting tired. Dirty John got me the four hours to Ohio though.

Oh, gosh. He sounds imperative to check out. I'm doing two hour stretches on the regular, and staying focused on the drive is proving to be, well, let's say something of a challenge.

Driving is so freaking boring. My mind just will not stay focused. I can't count the number of times I've missed exits.
 
Jumping in with a question:

Nudity in Movies.

Women have been nude in movies since the beginning of time, or at least Eastman Kodak time. And I’m cool with that. On the other hand it is impossible to argue that the objectification of the nude body has been well balanced. And I’m not talking about some guy who went full frontal on Game of Thrones, I’m talking about objectification—the fun kind.

Would you be more interested in a movie with male objectification. And by that I mean high art cinema like Friday the 13th Part 57 where a guy strips naked and goes full dick and balls.

Or a Porky’s remake where a group of girls spy on the guys showers with lots of close ups of male flesh.

Straight Women: would this make a movie more interesting to you?
Straight Guys: are we so homophobic (we all are a little bit) that we couldn’t enjoy a scene like this
Gay dudes: I don’t think I even have to ask you this question :D
Lesbians: are you already satisfied with the gratuitous female nudity that has reigned supreme for decades, but think it’s time guys whipped it out and soaped it up in slo-mo?
Bi-people: your answer also seems obvious, but let’s hear it.

Let’s talk naked dick . . .
 
Would you be more interested in...a Porky’s remake where a group of girls spy on the guys showers with lots of close ups of male flesh.
I know I'd like to see a scene like that, but I also have to say that I've known plenty of straight guys who would get just as turned on by it as I would. They wouldn't be turned on by the sight of male flesh but rather by the idea of girls doing the peeping and getting turned on by it.

The difference between the sight of a flaccid dick and a hard dick in the movies is huge (even if the dick isn't). The sight of a woman showering is pretty much the same whether she is turned on or not. A guy showering while sporting a boner is a whole different kettle of fish than a guy showering with a dick limply hanging there.
 
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