Literotica Side Story

[Always]

Originally posted by Dixon Carter Lee

When you're a Lit, you're a Lit all the way,
From your first PM hit, till your last cyber lay.
When you're a Lit you're the top clique in town,
You're the gold metal server that never goes down.

The Lit's are in gear, the circutry is pumping,
We make trolls disappear, and everyone is humping.
And aint' that sumpin'?

When you're a Lit you're the clique that's the best,
You've got brothers around and they all like incest....

*bursts out laughing*

I want to be in Lit'rotica
Okay by me in Lit'rotica
Everyone free in Lit'rotica
Except for me in Lit'rotiCA!!!!

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Deeeeeeeeear kindly Siren fuck me,
You gotta understan',
It's just I spank the monkey,
I'm tired of my hand,
My father he plays football,
My brothers ain't no monks,
Golly, Moses, naturally we're hunks.

Oh ask her to fuck me,
I'm very upset,
I never get the love that every pervert should get.
I ain't no delinquint, I'm misunderstood,
Deep down inside me I'm no prude.

I'm no prude!

I'm no prude, I'm no prude,
I'm no earthly prude,
Like inside the rest of me is rude!

 

[Master Chi]

To the tune of "Maria"

Kay Why... I've just used a lube called Kay Why...
And suddenly my cod, is a sticky hard rod...
With Kay Why...

The Most silippery dick you
Ever yanked...


Yank it soft, and its almost like laying...
Yank it hard, and soon I'll be spraying...

With Kay Why,
I just launched a wad with
KAY WHY!

I'll never do it again any other way than with KAY WHY!!!
Kay Why! Kay Why! Kay Why!

(apologies to L. Bernstein et al.)

 

[Siren]

Holy Fucking Shit !!!!!!!!

 

[Always]

*chuckles* poor Siren.


I like the newbie's contribution... *grins*



Tonight, tonight, I'm getting fucked tonight....
By the girl of my dreams yes it's true.....




Someone's coming, somone big
Spurting random like a pig
All over me.....
All over me!


*sighs* Can't mangulate an entire song, wrong mood today. Sorry!

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Always]

my guess is *brat* doesn't get it *pouts*

ever seen the West Side Story? It's a musical. we're making spoofs of the songs in it.... though your other normal spoofs are quite amusing.

 

[*bratcat*]

doh!

 

[Pokerman]

But we'll forgive her cuz she's so damn sweet....

"I like to be in Literotica!
O.K. by me in Literotica!
Ev'rything free in Literotica
Never a fee at Literotica!"

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Too tiiiight!
Too tiiiight!
It's all God-damned too tight!
I lubed you but the lube dried awaaay.

Too tiiiight!
Too tiiiight!
I can't fit in quite right,
Does this mean that I'm not really gaaaaaay?

Todaaaaay, the reaming it took hours,
We took so many showers,
But now there is no waaaaaay...

 

[Always]

gaki neko! (that's japanese for bratcat, so you know)

*smirks*

I think I go back to non-porn
I know a thread you can blow horn
Everyone nonperv will give big cheer
Everyone cool will have moved here!!!!

 

[Barb Dwyer]

Picture it...Maria singing in front of the mirror

I feel slutty
Oh so slutty
I feel slutty and smutty like trash
More like putty in the hands of one who wants more cash

I feel trampy
Oh so trampy
Its so vampy how trampy I feel
And so slutty that I hardly can believe it's real!

See the slutty girl at the General Board
Who can that little jezebel be?
Such a tiny skirt such a low cut blouse
Such big bouncy tits such a slutty me?

I feel wanton like a trollop
Like a hussy who's always in heat
Lucky for me all the fellows who taste a dollop
Say I'm good to eat!

I'm a bimbo
I'm a contortionist who's good at the limbo!
And a strumpet
Like Ms. Pulitzer I can play a trumpet

See the slutty girl at the General Board
What a little saucebox has she
Such big tits, such a tight pussy
Such a slut I am - that's me!!!!

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Alright, the show's almost written Time to cast this puppy. Open auditions for the following roles:

Tony - Leading Man type, Romantic, with a thuggish background. 17.
Maria - Igenue. Sweet, innocent, with a passion ready to flower. 16 (or at least can play it).
Riff - Comedic leader of the gang. Must dance. 17.
Bernardo - Angry young man type. Moves well. 17.
Anita - Fire breather, knows her man, knows herself, knows what she wants. A very experienced mid-20s.
Gladhands - Icabod Crane type, dopey, likes bow ties and manners. 30s.
Inspector - Gruff, seasoned cop. Racist. 40s.
Officer Krupke - Flunky, exceedingly vacant and humorless. A seedy 30s.
Anybody's - Tomboy, would sleep around if anyone would have her. Petite.
The Jets and Sharks - Ballet dancers in sneakers acting butch.

Nudity and oral sex required for all roles. Maria must go both ways.

 

[Laurel]

Let's start the auditions for Maria and Tony.

 

[Silverlily]

Toys, toys, sexy toys
Get Lit toys.
Got a rocket for your pocket,
Those little toys.

Nice and hot,
Cause man you've got
Some good times ahead.

Take it slow, baby ohh,
You can live it up
Even when you're not in bed.

Toys, toys, sexy toys,
Stay charged toys.
Lube it, use it
Don't abuse it,
Turn up the juice - TOYS!

 

[Merelan]

I thought we weren't allowed to play under 18?


Think it will make a big enough hit on Broadway to get a Rosie mention?