Limerance

[Justfantasies]

"Limerence is a state of mind which results from romantic feelings for another person, and typically includes intrusive, melancholic thoughts, or tragic concerns for the object of one's affection as well as a desire to form or maintain a relationship with the object of love and to have one's feelings reciprocated. ....nThe four stages of limerence are attraction, obsession, elation and frustration, and resolution. These four limerence stages help us understand the experience of intense romantic obsession and infatuation. Limerence and love are not the same." Adapted from Wikipedia

Who here has had a limerance relationship? Mine has lasted 50 years and is only just beginning to wane.

 

[Justfantasies]

Bump ...

 

[Wriggle]

I have discussed limerence with a few very clever ladies of lit.

In a way it's what makes this place so addictive - and painful.

 

[Justfantasies]

I have discussed limerence with a few very clever ladies of lit.

In a way it's what makes this place so addictive - and painful.

The "relationship" shaped me in so many ways -- in good ways too. But i also warped me.

 

[Oshkosh60]

So I guess we would all like to know who this crush was.......

 

[Justfantasies]

So I guess we would all like to know who this crush was.......

Are you asking me? Feel free to PM if you like

 

[Giftboy]

I too had one of these awful dependence’s. I was 19 she was 46. She seduced me had deep sexual play with my micro-cock. She displayed me for her friends: sucked me, pegged me, nippled me, whipped and skinned me, TBDFFTSJPMMVTEW me, until I instantly disengorged my anal canal at a word. Then, she was gone. Leaving me in a wilderness of cravings, where I seek, to this day, succour from big fat anonymous cocks. Terrible, terrible dependence, that just will not leave me.

 

[MaxwellSmart86]

So that's what that is called. I've had it happen twice in my life.

The first was when I was in the 4th grade and one of the girls in the class was really nice to me one day. I developed a crush on her that last 4 years.

The second time was when I got my first girlfriend in high school. Even though that relationship didn't work out and we went our separate ways, thinking about her has last for 27 years. The frequency and intensity fluctuates.

 

[quietlylooking]

I have experienced limerence a few times, most notably with someone I met (totally innocently) online almost 20 years ago. Eventually I realized that I had to distance myself from him to stop it, but I needed to find a crutch to help me out. That was what led me eventually to Lit.

I still interact with the object of that limerence experience once in a while, but I'm happy to report that the limerence is completely, utterly gone.

 

[Justfantasies]

So that's what that is called. I've had it happen twice in my life.

The first was when I was in the 4th grade and one of the girls in the class was really nice to me one day. I developed a crush on her that last 4 years.

The second time was when I got my first girlfriend in high school. Even though that relationship didn't work out and we went our separate ways, thinking about her has last for 27 years. The frequency and intensity fluctuates.

I thought I was the only one -- but I have since discovered I am by now means the only one who has suffered. Are you still in touch with she from 27 years ago. I sometimes am with mine.

 

[MaxwellSmart86]

I thought I was the only one -- but I have since discovered I am by now means the only one who has suffered. Are you still in touch with she from 27 years ago. I sometimes am with mine.

My ex and I are still somewhat in touch. We have the occasional private message but she is married with kids now as am I and we do not engage in any flirtatious/innuendo conversations.

 

[Justfantasies]

Bump . . .

 

[Justfantasies]

One final bump …

 

[Justfantasies]

Had a dream about the subject of my limerance last night

 

[Justfantasies]

writing about it seems to take away the bad feelings

 

[MiaBabe23]

I’m not convinced some of what’s being described above is limerence.
If you’ve connected with someone, truly come to care for them, recognize how special they are, call it what it is - love
But maybe that perspective isn’t welcome, in which case I apologize

 

[Justfantasies]

I’m not convinced some of what’s being described above is limerence.
If you’ve connected with someone, truly come to care for them, recognize how special they are, call it what it is - love
But maybe that perspective isn’t welcome, in which case I apologize

Well I have beieved I was in love with this woman for 50 years and haven't seen her for 40. Occasional contact over all this time. She seemed like the perfect woman

 

[MiaBabe23]

So she’s someone you were in love with, will always hold a special place in your heart, like your first love?
Does it need to be downgraded with a label?

 

[Justfantasies]

So she’s someone you were in love with, will always hold a special place in your heart, like your first love?
Does it need to be downgraded with a label?

No it doesn't. But a little voice in my head tells me ever so often that I will get her back some day. Doesn't seem healthy.

 

[MiaBabe23]

Does it stop you living or loving the one you’re with?
A little voice in my head tells me one day I’ll win the Nobel Peace Prize and travel to the moon - gives me a warm fuzzy feeling then I just carry on…

 

[Justfantasies]

No it doesn't prevent me from doing anything -- never has really

 

[MiaBabe23]

Sorry misclick of the emoji there
So it’s not interrupting life? Does thinking of her bring you joy?

 

[Justfantasies]

Sorry misclick of the emoji there
So it’s not interrupting life? Does thinking of her bring you joy?

It brings me frustration

Of course, I have never "waited" for her.

 

[MiaBabe23]

No joy? Are you frustrated about something you could’ve done differently?

 

[Justfantasies]

No joy? Are you frustrated about something you could’ve done differently?

Yes you are quite right -- some I could have done differently. I am grateful for your interest