Life's Too Short...

[Joe Wordsworth]

...the fuck?

Life's the longest thing anyone does. There is nothing one does longer than life. Got plenty of time. Use it, there's a ton.

 

[BlackShanglan]

So life's long enough to waste some of it, say, listening to patronizing comments from the parents of a Game Stop employee?

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

So life's long enough to waste some of it, say, listening to patronizing comments from the parents of a Game Stop employee?

I'm gonna treat you like a woman. Because I've been drinking tonite.

What it comes down to is if I don't make the time, by God who will?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I'm gonna treat you like a woman. Because I've been drinking tonite.

What it comes down to is if I don't make the time, by God who will?

Like most women, horses like to have their hair brushed. How nice of you to volunteer.

What'cha drinking?

Also, you've not got so many hopes and dreams that one lifetime will fit them all in?

~lucky

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Like most women, horses like to have their hair brushed. How nice of you to volunteer.

What'cha drinking?

Also, you've not got so many hopes and dreams that one lifetime will fit them all in?

~lucky

I have a bottle of giftin' wine that's joining the empty one in few minutes. I am drunk. I shouldn't even be posting. But I am. Booya, grandma.

But hopes and dreams? Got plenty o' time. A little elbow grease, a little work--pow.

Pow!

Think about that.

No, you think about that.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I wanna hang out at your place when you're sluggin' back the giftin' wine.

When does the table dancing start?

 

[BlackShanglan]

I'm gonna treat you like a woman. Because I've been drinking tonite.

What it comes down to is if I don't make the time, by God who will?

In the morning, you will be appalled by how enticing I find that

Your sacrifice of time to the uninteresting is noble. Quite seriously. Everyone likes someone to listen to his or her obscure ramblings. Blessed are the patient and the slightly drunk.

 

[Guest]

What it comes down to is if I don't make the time, by God who will?

Very nicely put, Joe. (And not a bit of semantic argument.)


You're an awfully cute drunk.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Not cute... Not cute. Bunnies are cute.

I am a spectacular creation. You ever have a guy poke you in the back when you're all sleeping in the morning, but try to pass it off as "I'm sleeping, and don't notice that my erection is sliding and poking its way all over your ass"?

I invented that move. Me. I was the first to come up with that ever, and taught it to primitive man.

I call it "The Hitchiker".

 

[BlackShanglan]

Good lord, he *is* drunk.

How amusing.

 

[Dar~]

he's also fucking rude...

 

[Op_Cit]

A good point.

It's the other side of eternity: The infinite span of time from the first thought that passed through your brain until right now.

And it leads one to wonder at people that accept their own non-existence the moment before they're born, yet cannot the hold same that second after the last thought passes throught their head.

It seems a great silly irony how belief in the greater entity or hereafter allows people to do and be such terrible things, when if you knew this was absolutely it, you'd have to try to get it right the first time.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

A good point.

It's the other side of eternity: The infinite span of time from the first thought that passed through your brain until right now.

And it leads one to wonder at people that accept their own non-existence the moment before they're born, yet cannot the hold same that second after the last thought passes throught their head.

It seems a great silly irony how belief in the greater entity or hereafter allows people to do and be such terrible things, when if you knew this was absolutely it, you'd have to try to get it right the first time.

eternity is my bitch

 

[lucky-E-leven]

You ever have a guy poke you in the back when you're all sleeping in the morning, but try to pass it off as "I'm sleeping, and don't notice that my erection is sliding and poking its way all over your ass"?

Ever have a chick that was completely and utterly turned off with the, "Oops! Morning wood," game and yawned as she maneuvered her thighs just so, allowing you to think you had the All-ahead-clear, only to have her clamp her thighs down around your cock and tense her muscles before curling into a ball - hence, dragging you bodily after your poor captured member as it moved away from your body much too far and much too quickly?

I invented that move. Me. I was the first to realize that when a man wanted sex he was going to try for it no matter how many times he'd been told not to pussy-foot around with poking me in the back.

I invented that move. Me. I was the first to come up with that ever, and taught it to primitive man.

I call it "The Hitchiker".

My ex-husband wishes you'd have perfected the move or never invented it at all.

 

[BlackShanglan]

eternity is my bitch

Damn, that's a great line for a movie.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

he's also fucking rude...

He's among friends, Dar.

He's inhebriated and as far as I can tell he's just trying to have fun.

You'll know when he's being rude.

~lucky

 

[LadyJeanne]

Not cute... Not cute. Bunnies are cute.

I am a spectacular creation. You ever have a guy poke you in the back when you're all sleeping in the morning, but try to pass it off as "I'm sleeping, and don't notice that my erection is sliding and poking its way all over your ass"?

I invented that move. Me. I was the first to come up with that ever, and taught it to primitive man.

I call it "The Hitchiker".

Yep. Had a boyfriend who was a 'prodder'. He'd prod in bed, he'd prod while I was doing the dishes, he'd prod, prod, prod until I wanted to cut it off.

He thought it was cute.

My only satisfaction is that he hasn't had a girlfriend since I left him ten years ago.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Ever have a chick that was completely and utterly turned off with the, "Oops! Morning wood," game and yawned as she maneuvered her thighs just so, allowing you to think you had the All-ahead-clear, only to have her clamp her thighs down around your cock and tense her muscles before curling into a ball - hence, dragging you bodily after your poor captured member as it moved away from your body much too far and much too quickly?

I invented that move. Me. I was the first to realize that when a man wanted sex he was going to try for it no matter how many times he'd been told not to pussy-foot around with poking me in the back.



My ex-husband wishes you'd have perfected the move or never invented it at all.

"The Hitchiker"...

...

...

...

...is not for everyone.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

"The Hitchiker"...

...

...

...

...is not for everyone.

Amen!

And goodnight.

Don't forget the aspirin before bed and lotsa water.

~lucky

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

...which is why some other guy invented "The Cottonmouth".

 

[BlackShanglan]

My only satisfaction is that he hasn't had a girlfriend since I left him ten years ago.

My God, you do leave the earth scorched behind you. But then, what else was likely to compare, eh?

 

[BlackShanglan]

...which is why some other guy invented "The Cottonmouth".

Oh go on. Do tell.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Oh go on. Do tell.

It's when you arrange for chickie to fall asleep with your cock in her mouth. It's a wonderful think to constantly wake up to.

 

[BlackShanglan]

It's when you arrange for chickie to fall asleep with your cock in her mouth. It's a wonderful think to constantly wake up to.

I think I'd be worried about dreams in which she imagines she's eating Polish sausages.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

I wrote a sex guide, once. Included all the best stuff I ever came up with or heard.

Cat in the Cradle
No Room at the Inn
The Hitchiker
The Intruder
Jawminator
Cottonmouth
The Crab
The Humpty-Rumpty
Covert Ops
Wallbang
etc.