Let's play "WAIT! WAIT! DON'T TELL ME."

[shereads]

Since I'm not ashamed to steal but just haven't done it yet, here goes. I'm adapting (stealing) this game-show idea from a current events quiz on National Public Radio.

Below are two summarized news stories.
One is true. The other I made up. The object of the game is to identify the true story.

You might also use two stories from history. Or two passages from literature. The point is to match one truth with one example of how good a liar you are. (Oops! I meant to say, how inventive.)

To play by the rules: decide which story is true and post your reply. If you are the first person to post the correct answer, take up the thread with one truth and one fiction of your own. If your correct answer is too late, you still win a prize. (That's a lie.)

To cheat: scroll down to the bottom of my post, read the answer and then post your reply. Live with the shame, you miserable scofflaw.

---------------

Which story is true:

#1: "Premature Vindication"

A Florida man, imprisoned 22 years ago for rape, is still in prison three years after a DNA test contradicted the original forensics evidence. Prosecutors had based their case on a lab match between the defendant's pubic hair and one found on the victim. DNA evidence, obtained by a member of O.J. Simpson's defense team who took the case pro bono, proves that the hair could not be the defendant's.

When a judge granted the request for a new trial, prosecutors appealed on the grounds that the new evidence was obtained before Florida published its procedural rules for requesting DNA evidence. The hair from the crime scene was destroyed by the test, so a second try isn't possible.

The case came before an appeals court recently. When the judge asked the assistant attorney general why the state objected to a new trial, she explained that the defendant had not followed the rules which had not yet been adapted by the Legislature.

The judge then asked, "If you knew with 100% certaintly that this man was absolutely innocent, would you change your position in this case?"

"No," she answered. "That is not the issue."

-----------------

#2. "Neither fish nor fowl."

A Miami woman is suing a restaurant in Caracas, Venezuela for failing to tell her that carpincho, which she ordered believing it was a fish dish, is actually a large rodent.

An attorney for Carol Doherty said his client was returning from a vacation trip to Trinidad, missed her connecting flight to Miami from Caracas and booked a hotel for the night. She had dinner at Tarzilandia, a restaurant recommended by her hotel that specializes in traditional Venezuelan dishes like turtle pie and carpincho stew, which was listed along with fish dishes traditionally served on Friday in predominantly Catholic Venezuela.

Doherty complained to a waiter that the pieces of fish in her stew were tough "and stringy, like beef," her attorney told the Herald. The waiter allegedly laughed, then told Doherty that carpincho is not a fish, but a rodent.

Carpincho is a local name for capybara, a pig-size rodent related to the guinea pig. The meat is said to have a fishy taste and is high in protein. In the 17th century, Vatican officials agreed to designate the capybara as a fish so that rural Venezuelans could eat the meat during Lent. Stewed carpincho is a fixture on the holiday tables of Roman Catholics in the Orinoco River basin.

It didn't taste like fish to Carol Doherty. "It tasted disgusting," according to her attorney. "The staff evidently enjoy telling Americans that they're eating stew made from rats."


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Scroll down for the answer. AFTER you post your answer.






















































#1 is true. If you're the first to get it right, it's your turn.

 

[minsue]

OK, I'll bite. I haven't scrolled down, though the urge was difficult to fight.

I'll vote for the first as the true one only because I can't see the Vatican classifying a capybara as a fish.



Edited to add:

Crap! You didn't tell me I had to pick the next one!



Sucked me in, dammit. I can never resist Wait! Wait! Don't Tell Me!

 

[minsue]

I'll go with historical lists, I suppose.


#1 - Communist Rules for Revolution

In May 1919 at Dusseldorf, Germany, the allied forces discovered a copy of these 'Rules.' They were first printed in the United States in the 'Bartlesville (Oklahoma) Examiner-Enterprise' the same year, 1919.

Almost 20 years later, in 1946, the attorney general of Florida obtained them from a known member of the Communist Party, who acknowledged that the 'Rules' were then still a part of the Communist program for the United States.

1. Corrupt the young; get them away from religion. Get them interested in sex. Make them superficial; destroy their ruggedness.

2. Get control of all means of publicity, thereby:

3. Get people's minds off their government by focusing their attention on athletics, sexy books, plays and immoral movies.

4. Divide the people into hostile groups by constantly harping on controversial matters of no importance.

5. Destroy the people's faith in their natural leaders by holding the latter up to contempt, ridicule and disgrace.

6. Always preach true democracy, but seize power as fast and as ruthlessly as possible.

7. By encouraging government extravagance, destroy its credit, produce years of inflation with rising prices and general discontent.

8. Incite unnecessary strikes in vital industries, encourage civil disorders and foster a lenient and soft attitude on the part of government toward such disorders.

9. Cause breakdown of the old moral values - honesty, sobriety, self-restraint, faith in the pledged word, ruggedness.

10. Cause the registration of all firearms on some pretext, with a view to confiscate them and leaving the populace helpless.

#2 - Guide to Hiring Women

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Mass Transportation Magazine. This was written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II.

Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees

There's no longer any question whether transit companies should hire women for jobs formerly held by men. The draft and manpower shortage has settled that point. The important things now are to select the most efficient women available and how to use them to the best advantage. Here are eleven helpful tips on the subject from western properties:

1. If you can get them, pick young married women. They have these advantages, according to the reports of western companies: they usually have more of a sense of responsibility than do their unmarried sisters; they're less likely to be flirtatious; as a rule, they need the work or they wouldn't be doing it -- maybe a sick husband or one who's in the army; they still have the pep and interest to work hard and to deal with the public efficiently.

2. When you have to use older women, try to get ones who have worked outside the home at some time in their lives. Most transportation companies have found that older women who have never contacted the public, have a hard time adapting themselves, are inclined to be cantankerous and fussy. It's always well to impress upon older women the importance of friendliness and courtesy.

3. While there are exceptions, of course, to this rule, general experience indicates that "husky" girls - those who are just a little on the heavy side - are likely to be more even-tempered and efficient than their underweight sisters.

4. Retain a physician to give each woman you hire a special physical examination - one covering female conditions. This step not only protects the property against the possibilities of lawsuit but also reveals whether the employee-to-be has any female weaknesses which would make her mentally or physically unfit for the job. Transit companies that follow this practice report a surprising number of women turned down for nervous disorders.

5. In breaking in women who haven't previously done outside work, stress at the outset the importance of time -- the fact that a minute or two lost here and there makes serious inroads on schedules. Until this point is gotten across, service is likely to be slowed up.

6. Give the female employee in garage or office a definite day-long schedule of duties so that she'll keep busy without bothering the management for instructions every few minutes. Numerous properties say that women make excellent workers when they have their jobs cut out for them but that they lack initiative in finding work themselves.

7. Whenever possible, let the inside employee change from one job to another at some time during the day. Women are inclined to be nervous and they're happier with change.

8. Give every girl an adequate number of rest periods during the day. Companies that are already using large numbers of women stress the fact that you have to make some allowances for feminine psychology. A girl has more confidence and consequently is more efficient if she can keep her hair tidied, apply fresh lipstick and wash her hands several times a day.

9. Be tactful in issuing instructions or in making criticisms. Women are often sensitive; they can't shrug off harsh words the way that men do. Never ridicule a woman - it breaks her spirit and cuts her efficiency.

10. Be reasonably considerate about using strong language around women. Even though a girl's husband or father may swear vociferously, she'll grow to dislike a place of business where she hears too much of this.

11. Get enough size variety in operator uniforms that each girl can have a proper fit. This point can't be stressed too strongly as a means of keeping women happy, according to western properties.

The correct answer is #2, of course

 

[shereads]

I'll vote for the first as the true one only because I can't see the Vatican classifying a capybara as a fish.

That part is true. Venezuela is trying to promote capybara meat overseas. It is a designated fish.

See? It's harder than you thought.

Congratulations.

 

[shereads]

I'll go with historical lists, I suppose.


#1 - Communist Rules for Revolution


#2 - Guide to Hiring Women

waving my hand at the back of the classroom

I know this one! I know this one!

I'm disqualifying myself, though, because I don't want another turn.

 

[minsue]

That part is true. Venezuela is trying to promote capybara meat overseas. It is a designated fish.

See? It's harder than you thought.

Congratulations.

It's my favorite part of the show. Just go with the least believable. It's always the true one.

I'm glad you stuck to 2 stories instead of 3. It was hard enough to find 2 to use.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Minsue posted:

In May 1919 at Dusseldorf, Germany, the allied forces discovered a copy of these 'Rules.' They were first printed in the United States in the 'Bartlesville (Oklahoma) Examiner-Enterprise' the same year, 1919.

Almost 20 years later, in 1946...

1946 ain't no "almost twenty years later" than 1919.

---dr.M.

 

[minsue]

Minsue posted:

In May 1919 at Dusseldorf, Germany, the allied forces discovered a copy of these 'Rules.' They were first printed in the United States in the 'Bartlesville (Oklahoma) Examiner-Enterprise' the same year, 1919.

Almost 20 years later, in 1946...

1946 ain't no "almost twenty years later" than 1919.

---dr.M.

LOL

I know. I took it from Snopes and was too lazy to change anything. Apparently it was one of the myriad bullshit e-mails that are constantly forwarded around the globe, all most all of them forwarded to me by the people I work with who always believe them with reasoning such as, "My brother sent it to me and he wouldn't forward it if it weren't true.*"


*actual quote from a co-worker when I tried to explain that one of the e-mails she sent to everyone was completely false.

 

[wishfulthinking]

Ok, I got both, so here's my go:

#1 Judge rules girl can become boy

The Family Court has delivered a unique judgment allowing a 13-year-old girl who wants to be a boy to begin a sex-change process and amend the child's birth certificate.

The landmark decision by outgoing Chief Justice Alistair Nicholson is the first time an Australian child who is biologically one sex has been given legal approval to begin to change to the other through hormone treatment because of purely psychiatric issues.

Alex is treated as a boy and uses men's toilets.

"He didn't like dolls. He liked playing with tanks and a sword. He had few female friends," his mother told a psychologist.

The legal action was initiated by a state welfare department on Alex's behalf.

Alex lives with her aunt, who, despite some reservations, now treats him as a boy.


#2 Headmistress canes colleague to teach him discipline

A teacher suffered bruises after he was caned by his headmistress for criticising her ideas on discipline, local media reported Tuesday.

The headmistress, in her 50s, was reportedly upset with the teacher because he opposed her plans to improve discipline among students. She grabbed her cane and attacked him in front of other teachers.

The man, in his 30s, did not fight back and suffered bruises.

'He lodged a police report but later withdrew it after talks with the headmistress and district education officers. The matter was settled amicably.

Scroll down…

























Both are true I’m simply playing with your mind.

#1 http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5744,9275542%5E421,00.html

#2 http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5744,9468536%5E29677,00.html