lesbiens

[Fly_On_Wall]

Gilly he he doesn't want the spankings.....

Can I take them

 

[Bob Peale]

Does that mean we can spank you?

Now Gilly, you never have to ask <weg>

 

[Gilly Bean]

Gilly he he doesn't want the spankings.....

Can I take them

Hmm... Only if you can be bad for me

Now Gilly, you never have to ask <weg>

Mmm... Anytime you are up for it doll

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Why are all non-lesbians answering for them? And why are they all so quiet?

I would have suggested the "run as fast as you can" response, but it is interesting that no one has flamed him yet.

I am not answering for them - I am just proposing a possiblity, that anyone, including lesbians can shoot down as they wish.

But then, if I was a lesbian I probably wouldn't even open the thread due to the misspelling.

As for flames - give him a break, he is trying and has been trying to do better and this is better than previous threads. As he pointed out, anyone can make a mistake, and some of us got a really good laugh out it.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

Ohhhh i can be bad


whatcha have in mind hehe

 

[nasty]

Can I have a spanking too?

 

[sexy-girl]

HKBJ

To answer your question, I don't think it has anything to do with being with the *wrong* man. In fact I think that question is usually viewed hostilely by many lesbians.

exactly right lavender i wont speak for all lesbians cause never will beat me up ... but come on the whole point of being a lesbian is that we dont need men ... men get jealous of that fact so they like to say we need a man to make a girl into a lesbian


nope we can do that part of it on our own too


disclaimer


im not actually a man hating lesbian (although im still learning) my post is a mix of truth and sarcasm so you'll have to pick out the bits you want

 

[Mischka]

Why are all non-lesbians answering for them?

I'm a confirmed non-lesbian, but I think my answer may help augment BJ's understanding. I've been on some pretty horrid dates with guys, and it never dawned on me once to turn to women instead. BJ, I've seen you mention that you've had difficulties with women - has it ever inspired you to seek romantic relationships with men instead?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

I'm a confirmed non-lesbian, but I think my answer may help augment BJ's understanding. I've been on some pretty horrid dates with guys, and it never dawned on me once to turn to women instead. BJ, I've seen you mention that you've had difficulties with women - has it ever inspired you to seek romantic relationships with men instead?

I doubt very many men or women would turn to their own sex solely due to bad experiences with the opposite sex - however, if a gay person had repressed their feelings for the same sex due to societal peer pressure, to the point of denial, it could be that continued problems with the opposite sex would help them reevaluate that part of their lives.

Not all gays start off knowing they are gay and admitting it and never having romantic relationships/sex with the opposite sex.

Plus, during puberty, sexual identity and sexual attraction can get all mixed up; how many straight people experimented sexually with members of their own sex when very young - yet have no attraction now?

Like I said - we are complex creatures - there is no one simple answer for how we arrive at our sexual identities.

 

[Mischka]

...there is no one simple answer for how we arrive at our sexual identities.

STG, I completely agree with everything you said. I posted a less in-depth response because BJ posed such a black-and-white question, and I wanted to counter his initial assumption (A or B. If not A, then B.).

And now I think I'll peruse the other half dozen lesbian threads on the top of the first page...

 

[sexy-girl]

STG i agree to a point but i think that set of circumstances is probably more rare then people think ... i think most lesbians find out for themselves and it doesnt take a bad relationship with a guy for them to find out ... i have plenty of male friends so i can see that not all guys are bad infact most are nice


what about the girls that have nice guys as boyfriends but then decide they are gay


or many lesbians that have never had a boyfriend


my point is there is peer preasure for girls to date boys even when a girl suspects she's gay ... but regardless of if a guy she dated was nice or not i think she would make up her mind she was gay if she was


i think your idea probably suits more girls that are bi but decide they dont want the hassle of dating men and will just date girls



my next question is why is there so many lesbian threads at the moment ... none of them started by never or me too

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

STG i agree to a point but i think that set of circumstances is probably more rare then people think ... i think most lesbians find out for themselves and it doesnt take a bad relationship with a guy for them to find out ... i have plenty of male friends so i can see that not all guys are bad infact most are nice

Agreed; as has been pointed out - many less enlightened people like to think of people being gay due to problems with the opposite sex, when actually, that even being a factor, is rare. This is especially true as society becomes more accepting of gays being gay and thinks less of being gay as an adbomination (pedophiles are adbominations! gays are a variation on the theme).

my next question is why is there so many lesbian threads at the moment ... none of them started by never or me too

Lesbian sex portrayals and themes are attractive to straight men and bi women - maybe even straight women (?) - and Lesbian women. That covers a lot of ground here.

 

[sexy-girl]

Agreed; as has been pointed out - many lees enlightened people like to think of people bieng gay due to problems with the opposite sex, when actually, that even being a factor, is rare. This is especially true as society becomes more accepting of gays being gay and thinks less of being gay as an adbomination (pedophiles are adbominations! gays are a variation on the theme).

thanks STG you are able to put things across a lot better then me im glad you knew what i meant

 

[sigh]

Like I said - we are complex creatures - there is no one simple answer for how we arrive at our sexual identities.

i've skirted around the edges of joining this thread for a couple of days now...reading everyone's responses...glancing up again and again at the insulting way the question was first raised...teetering on the edge of bursting into flame, but then chilled by the realization that there may be a sharp edge of truth within the stupidity

am i gay? first question, and i can't even answer that one, so how do i answer why?

okay, make it simpler...do i make love to women? yes, most emphatically, and i enjoy it immensely, with no sense of guilt or hesitation

so am i gay?

i just don't know...all i can say for sure (in relation to the question at the start of this discussion) is that something happened to me when i was very young that left me frightened of men (and even hateful for a time)

(shit...my heart is thumping and my fingers are trembling even as i type this...ah, for killer muffin's cool strength, i'd give the world...)

so is that why i turned to women? could such an event, by itself, change a sexual preference? i doubt i'll ever know the answer for sure because i don't know what my life would have been like if the event hadn't occurred...it's all speculation, isn't it?

so STG had it right...it's just too fucking complex sometimes

now the decision...do i click "submit reply" or not?

 

[Guest]

Re: lesbians

have you always liked women or just had bad dates with men?

Yes...at first glance this did feel like a very negative way to propose a question...but I feel that it was asked in honesty.

How we arrive at our sexuality isn't a easy road. I'd say there are as many reasons for choosing or being what we are as there are people.


I have a male friend that is gay...his mother had sexually abused him all through his childhood. He has dreams about women's vaginas having teeth trying to swallow him up. (Remember that scene in 'The Wall?')

Just one human, his trauma and his sexuality. The complexities are vast and I'm not sure it could ever be just a simple question.

Sigh...I am very glad you hit the submit button. I feel that every time we convey our feelings about something painful within ourselves..it allows a little bit of strength to reach out and touch us through the muck. ~smiles at you~

 

[Saturn Return]

Ah..that was me

Damn Cookies!

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Before people agree with me too much I have a confession:

For some time, mostly due to brainwashing and a dogma by some people in my religion (Christianity), I thought of homosexuals as abnormal, even tending towards an adbomination because that is how some people in my religion tended to paint gays (due to a verse in the Bible).

I didn't hate gays, I didn't condem them to hell, and I wasn't homophobic in the sense that I feared them - I just had the distinct impression that homosexuality was/is wrong.

Turn the page and contrast this with my own strong attractions to girl on girl sex, along with the fact that homosexuality, while not strictly the norm in the animal world (we are animals after all) - it is not an adbomination either; while the majority of animals are heterosexual, there are over 400 species that exhibit homosexual and bisexual behaviors, and not just in a rare minority.

So, given that truth - what wins out, truth or dogma? Truth.

I still have my aversion to male homosexuality, but I recognize at least part of that is cultural. I have no attraction to other men which I think is mostly biological; I tend to prefer the female form and psyche. If a woman works hard enough to get six pack abs, that is not attractive to me. Strongly defined musles are a turn off to me even though they are usually unmistakenly women (usually) - so I am pretty sure most of my being straight is biological/genetics, while I am sure some of it is cultural too.

So there you have it - not quite as "enlightened" as some people, but that is who I am.

 

[sigh]

two things saturn, then i'll bow out...

~ thanks for the smile and the sentiment - it doesn't take much to lift a spirit sometimes

~ HKBJ's question might have been honest, but was asked in a deliberately provocative way, and so was insulting...and stupid too

and STG - stop being so modest and just blush and accept the compliments...you deserve them

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

and STG - stop being so modest and just blush and accept the compliments...you deserve them

Thanks - but I wasn't so much being modest as honest. Just letting people know what goes on in my mind - if anybody can make any sense out that convoluted grey mess

 

[sigh]

Thanks - but I wasn't so much being modest as honest. Just letting people know what goes on in my mind - if anybody can make any sense out that convoluted grey mess

see? there you go again...lol...you are a lost cause

*shaking my head in wonder...

 

[april-wine]

Is it biology, is it trauma, is it just plain old choice? Unfortunately, the answer as many have commented is not a simple one. Trauma, can change your life forever. Having not experienced it, in those all important developmental years, Would I be who I am today? Would any of us??

Personally, I did do what "normal" society insisted I should, and I was miserable. Now I have the most amazing woman in my life, and she has brought me what no man ever could; LOVE like I have never experienced. I am now complete. Would I have found this with that right man? Should I? The answer for me is NO, my lover is all I have ever needed and what I always want.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

see? there you go again...lol...you are a lost cause

Yep - that's me; maybe I should change my nom de plume; that would be a great one! Lost Cause! Hmm.. I like that somehow. Naw - but I am going to suggest it to my buddy that I am trying to get to come on here - it really describes him - I can't take him anywhere!

I thought of The Heretic, but I am going to do a political newspaper using that and I didn't want people to arrive there with preconcieved notions

*shaking my head in wonder...

Lucky you! If I shake my head my grey matter gets all jumbled and I pass out!

 

[april-wine]

now the decision...do i click "submit reply" or not?


__________________
sigh

you made the right decision as always.....hugs

 

[sexy-girl]

i guess what really matters isnt what started you on the journey but that your happy at the end


i guess nobody can ever be 100% sure why they are gay


its wonderful april that you've met such a wonderful girl she's really lucky and its even more wonderful that your happy


sigh i am very sorry about any pain you've had in your past but i hope you can be happy with who you are and that you dont have any regrets if you are gay thankyou for sharing something that was difficult to share *hugs*