Krista "Femitheist" Milburn: The Empathy Gap in Domestic Violence

[LJ_Reloaded]

http://www.femitheist.net/2015/12/the-empathy-gap-in-domestic-violence.html

I have been a victim of domestic abuse in more than one relationship during the past few years, undergoing not only physical violence, but also prolonged emotional abuse, financial control, alienation from friends and family, and more. There are few people today who would find themselves unable to empathize with me in such scenarios, and even fewer who could openly express their indifference toward my suffering without unforgiving public rebuke and shaming. The same cannot be said for male victims of domestic violence.

In the United States, the United Kingdom, and Canada, the percentages of male victims of domestic violence are roughly 40% [1:2], 50% [3], and 20%** [4], respectively. Even now, despite all of the activism, resources, and political attention directed toward women’s issues, victimized women may still struggle not only with recognizing the severity of their circumstances and escaping an abusive partner, but additionally with finding the help that they desperately need. Men, unfortunately, have it as bad if not worse in this regard.

Not only do men lack the same level of awareness for their issues, socially and politically, but they furthermore tend to have less social support and helpful resources than women, including shelters, which are a significant element of this. Similarly to women in certain cases, though, men may not perceive what they are experiencing as abuse, or they might simply not know how to escape their abuser. But unlike women due to differences in how they are perceived in society, they may also fear reporting due to stigma associated with male victimhood (being weak for allowing a woman to beat or control them, et cetera). At the same time, their abuse in the daily discourse over sex issues is regularly undercut or ignored, and reference to it is too frequently met with enmity, apathy, or contempt.

And the feminists on Literotica demonstrate daily that they are a part of this problem.