Keeping things for 'best'

[scheherazade_79]

God damn it!

I hate it!

Why am I surrounded by people who 'keep things for best'?

It's doing my fucking head in. My grandmother goes around the house in old cast-off clothes, despite the fact that she has two wardrobes full of perfectly nice ones. The best crockery is kept for... best. I've been nagged so much about keeping a pair of shoes for 'best' that I've solved the problem by owning only one pair. My parents have a 'best' car. They even put covers over the dining room chairs so that nobody (namely me) drops food over them over dinner. And now, it appears that we have a 'best' toilet...

So I crapped in it.

And got caught.

I didn't leave any skidmarks, I opened the window afterwards and I even sprayed some air-freshner.

But somehow, in the way that all mothers do, mine knew.

And she didn't like it very much. I have to admit, I didn't like it very much, either. I told her that I was fed up of everything being kept for best when we all might be swept down by a tornado tomorrow.

And then who'd be lamenting the fact that we kept so many things for 'best'?

 

[she_is_my_addiction]

God damn it!

I hate it!

Why am I surrounded by people who 'keep things for best'?

It's doing my fucking head in. My grandmother goes around the house in old cast-off clothes, despite the fact that she has two wardrobes full of perfectly nice ones. The best crockery is kept for... best. I've been nagged so much about keeping a pair of shoes for 'best' that I've solved the problem by owning only one pair. My parents have a 'best' car. They even put covers over the dining room chairs so that nobody (namely me) drops food over them over dinner. And now, it appears that we have a 'best' toilet...

So I crapped in it.

And got caught.

I didn't leave any skidmarks, I opened the window afterwards and I even sprayed some air-freshner.

But somehow, in the way that all mothers do, mine knew.

And she didn't like it very much. I have to admit, I didn't like it very much, either. I told her that I was fed up of everything being kept for best when we all might be swept down by a tornado tomorrow.

And then who'd be lamenting the fact that we kept so many things for 'best'?

I know exactly how you feel....my mother is the same way with some things.

I had a similar thought today, but what's the point of dealing with such ridiculous rules and restrictions when there is a big life to live out there, without worrying about wet clothes or dictionaries that can be replaced.

You aren't living if you're concentrating on things like that. I almost made that mistake today. Believe me, I can buy a new pocket dictionary.

Oh, and next time, leave a skid mark. Maybe your mother will see that it's just a toilet.

 

[oggbashan]

It is a relic of the attitude that kept 'The Parlour' immaculate for visitors such as the Vicar, when the house was so overcrowded with people that children slept six to a bed.

Tracing my wife's ancestors has been an eye-opener in that so many people were living in small two-up, two-down houses in 19th century censuses.

Having 'best' things was a sign that standards would not be allowed to slip. The difference between respectability and degraded poverty was wafer thin. Many families crossed that line during the depression of the 1930s and folk memories are long.

Be glad that you are free of the fear of the descent into grinding poverty that cherishes 'best' things as totems that the worst was past, but could return.

Og

 

[scheherazade_79]

Oh, and next time, leave a skid mark. Maybe your mother will see that it's just a toilet.

Trust me, next time I'll leave six

 

[oggbashan]

Ps

The 'best', if kept in immaculate condition, could always be pawned until next week's pay arrived, without affecting the day to day running of the household.

Condition is everything at the pawnbrokers.

Og

 

[AchtungNight]

I prefer the following quote on this subject.

"Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."

- Sean Connery, The Rock.

 

[scheherazade_79]

It is a relic of the attitude that kept 'The Parlour' immaculate for visitors such as the Vicar, when the house was so overcrowded with people that children slept six to a bed.

Tracing my wife's ancestors has been an eye-opener in that so many people were living in small two-up, two-down houses in 19th century censuses.

Having 'best' things was a sign that standards would not be allowed to slip. The difference between respectability and degraded poverty was wafer thin. Many families crossed that line during the depression of the 1930s and folk memories are long.

Be glad that you are free of the fear of the descent into grinding poverty that cherishes 'best' things as totems that the worst was past, but could return.

Og

That's the problem with my family. They're very much from that kind of background. My dad even eats the crust of the bread when it's stale. I'm the USA of my family, I'm afraid.

 

[FallingToFly]

I wear high heels to muck stalls, and my kids have been known to play dress-up in my wedding gown while having tea parties on my ruby ware....

The only thing sacred is the wedding ring... and I locked that in the safe box last November and forgot all about it.

 

[oggbashan]

Generation Gap

There is a big divide between those who remember the Second World War and the rationing that followed into the early 1950s, and those born later.

Keeping up appearances was essential to maintain morale when so much was wrong in the world around.

Women would scrub the doorsteps of their bomb-damaged houses daily even when the windows were devoid of glass. Their self-respect was all they had left.

Best possessions are psychological props showing that the privations of the past have been survived. Too many people lost everything they owned and treasured.

To have possessions that do not have to be used is an amazing change from 'Make Do and Mend'.

Og

 

[3113]

Why am I surrounded by people who 'keep things for best'?

I have to say, thank God for my mother. I remember growing up and going to houses where people kept couches under plastic and china locked away behind glass. My father thought that way, but my mother absolutely would not hear of it and over their long marriage she made sure that if you bought a Lalique ice bucket, you put ice in it and used it--maybe not daily, but certainly on the right occassion.

My mom liked beautiful stuff and she make sure it came out of closest and jewelry boxes and off the shelves. It didn't say locked away to be used only when the Rapture occured ("Jesus is here! Bring out the good stuff!").

My mom passed away some years ago, but my remaining family sticks by her philosophy. We like nice stuff, but we never buy anything that can't be used. So, no car that's so expensive you're afraid to drive it, no clothes so nice you're afraid to wear them, and no china so good you're afraid to put food on it.

A house should not be a museum.

 

[CharleyH]

God damn it!

I hate it!

Why am I surrounded by people who 'keep things for best'?

It's doing my fucking head in. My grandmother goes around the house in old cast-off clothes, despite the fact that she has two wardrobes full of perfectly nice ones. The best crockery is kept for... best. I've been nagged so much about keeping a pair of shoes for 'best' that I've solved the problem by owning only one pair. My parents have a 'best' car. They even put covers over the dining room chairs so that nobody (namely me) drops food over them over dinner. And now, it appears that we have a 'best' toilet...

So I crapped in it.

And got caught.

I didn't leave any skidmarks, I opened the window afterwards and I even sprayed some air-freshner.

But somehow, in the way that all mothers do, mine knew.

And she didn't like it very much. I have to admit, I didn't like it very much, either. I told her that I was fed up of everything being kept for best when we all might be swept down by a tornado tomorrow.

And then who'd be lamenting the fact that we kept so many things for 'best'?

LOL! YOU are the best!

 

[Guest]

 

[BlackShanglan]

My parents had the same mindset as 3113's. I used to hate to visit my cousins and grandmother, after a while, because although I loved them, they had homes crammed with tiny breakable nicknacks and objects intended to never be touched, and at the time i was busy being six. My parents took the approach of teaching us to respect property and objects, but also recognizing that fine, delicate, breakable objects aren't a great match with young children. Those were put away in a chest - we were allowed to visit them - until we were old enough to be able to enjoy them without being terrified of accidentally ruining them. My parents were also clever enough to tuck our earliest teddy bears into the chest when they were well-worn and near dissolution, providing to even very young minds an easily grasped illustration of the concept "delicate item with sentimental value." Everything else was made to be used and used for what it was made for.

I'm happy to say, as well, that Miss Manners is firmly with Scheherezade on this one. Our doyen of civility not only encourages people to use everything, but actively discourages museum rooms and museum objects deemed permanently too good for the people living in the house.

Shanglan

 

[3113]

I hate it!

Scheherazade, I think you should get out your frustration by writing a story about this. A couple (cousins maybe?) that, while house-sitting for "best" type relatives decide to, ahem, baptize every best item in the house.

Ah. Just imagine it On the covered (now uncovered) couch, in the guest bedroom, in the "best" bathroom, eating off the plates....

You could title it: "Only the Best!"

 

[sugared]

I have to say, thank God for my mother. I remember growing up and going to houses where people kept couches under plastic and china locked away behind glass. My father thought that way, but my mother absolutely would not hear of it and over their long marriage she made sure that if you bought a Lalique ice bucket, you put ice in it and used it--maybe not daily, but certainly on the right occassion.

My mom liked beautiful stuff and she make sure it came out of closest and jewelry boxes and off the shelves. It didn't say locked away to be used only when the Rapture occured ("Jesus is here! Bring out the good stuff!").

My mom passed away some years ago, but my remaining family sticks by her philosophy. We like nice stuff, but we never buy anything that can't be used. So, no car that's so expensive you're afraid to drive it, no clothes so nice you're afraid to wear them, and no china so good you're afraid to put food on it.

A house should not be a museum.

Amen.

My mother always put away the good stuff. I think she felt a bit guilty for buying it in the first place...especially clothes for herself. I must have all my possessions out for all to enjoy and be used ( with the exception of a few treasured irreplacable items). Mind you.. I am a designer and environment is very important to my sanity.. but I have a simple home and purge my stuff when needed. It's all about balance for me. Plus I dont want my guests to feel as if they are sitting in a china shop when I entertain either.

p.s.
I know I'm not an author... sorry if I intruded in the "hangout"

 

[Guest]

Scheherazade, I think you should get out your frustration by writing a story about this. A couple (cousins maybe?) that, while house-sitting for "best" type relatives decide to, ahem, baptize every best item in the house.

Ah. Just imagine it On the covered (now uncovered) couch, in the guest bedroom, in the "best" bathroom, eating off the plates....

You could title it: "Only the Best!"

Hehheh, I have a (nonerotic) story with this idea in it that I'm finishing.

We had very few things for "best" in my house. My mother was torn about it. She loved nice things and loved keeping them nice, but she couldn't resist using them. It was just important not to break things.

 

[she_is_my_addiction]

Hehheh, I have a (nonerotic) story with this idea in it that I'm finishing.

We had very few things for "best" in my house. My mother was torn about it. She loved nice things and loved keeping them nice, but she couldn't resist using them. It was just important not to break things.

shit...looking at this, it could be a very hot erotic story...keeping something for "best"...

 

[impressive]

shit...looking at this, it could be a very hot erotic story...keeping something for "best"...

*snicker* Instead locking it in a china cabinet, you lock it in a chastity belt?

 

[she_is_my_addiction]

*snicker* Instead locking it in a china cabinet, you lock it in a chastity belt?

basically...or it could be a sweet little BDSM story.

 

[Guest]

 

[she_is_my_addiction]

Amen.

My mother always put away the good stuff. I think she felt a bit guilty for buying it in the first place...especially clothes for herself. I must have all my possessions out for all to enjoy and be used ( with the exception of a few treasured irreplacable items). Mind you.. I am a designer and environment is very important to my sanity.. but I have a simple home and purge my stuff when needed. It's all about balance for me. Plus I dont want my guests to feel as if they are sitting in a china shop when I entertain either.

p.s.
I know I'm not an author... sorry if I intruded in the "hangout"

i know you by sight from the gee bee.

 

[sugared]

i know you by sight from the gee bee.

Well as long as I don't give you the hee bee gee bee's is all good then Thanks for the welcome guys

 

[Stella_Omega]

I have to say, however, looking at the chaos that four creative types can engender in one small house- I would LOVe to have a parlor, that is alsways spick-ands-span.

There are times that go, on for months when I can't have anyone in my house who is susceptible to allergies, athsma, or OCD behaviors- My hospitality WILL trigger it

 

[SeaCat]

Thankfully I never had to deal with this in my family as I grew up. Oh we had certain rules that rarely got broken. No wearing of good clothes while cleaning game is a good example. (The same for cleaning out the barns or shoveling snow.) If your boots weigh more than you do from the mud caked on them try to remember to take them off outside.

There were some rules that weren't broken more than once. If it's dirty, clean it. If it's yours or you use it, put it away. If you cook it, you eat it. Oh and if it's going to cause and explosion, do it in the barn or outside.

We lived in a house, not a museum.

Cat

 

[scheherazade_79]

Ah. Just imagine it On the covered (now uncovered) couch, in the guest bedroom, in the "best" bathroom, eating off the plates....

I'd probably be well qualified to write it - I come from a long line of cousins...