Just an observation

[SleepingWarrior]

Was never called any names fortunately *confusion grows on face as I realize something* only because I was never noticed was I not called any names.

 

[Weird Harold]

But it seems that lately all anyone can focus on is that they think they are ugly, or not meeting some imaginary standard that we have allowed society to thrust on us.
...
Can we please lighten up on ourselves, and have faith in who you are, and your beauty will shine through..

I've been a bit tempted to engage in a bit of "I'm uglier than you are, so quitcherbichin," or at leas tmore than the one post hwere I pointed out that all of the pictures I've posted also include something diversionary -- Eeyore, Jasmine, or some other Disney Princess.

I must admit, that most of my self-deprecation is tongue in cheek and intended to keep my hat size down to manageable levels.

I'm happy with who I am and how I look, but I honestly can't see what others see in either my looks or my intellect.

I'm constantly afraid that people are going to come to their senses and see that I'm really only average except for a few quirks and talents that set me apart in some few areas. I know exactly what I'm capable of, but people seem to think I'm infallible and that bothers me.

The one class of "I'm ugly" that I just don't understand, are people like Lava Goddess, Mistress, Jade, and others who could stand an extra pound or two yet cry about being fat -- that not only pussles me, but it worrys me too.

There are some pictures of some women with truly ugly exteriors on the Post & Caption thread. There is nobody yet who has posted a picture of themselves that can touch that kind of "ugly," just a lot of people who are average in one way or another.

There are a few really glamorous pictures too, and they make it a bit difficult to get excited over those of us who are only average.

Tiggs has just started a slightly more insidious "popularity list" thread that makes some people feel left out -- or at least that's how some people are are seeing that thread.

Todd's pic alone is enough to give most of us men an inferiority complex, if we don't have one already.

 

[morninggirl5]

Re: Re: Just an observation

I'm happy with who I am and how I look, but I honestly can't see what others see in either my looks or my intellect.

I'm constantly afraid that people are going to come to their senses and see that I'm really only average except for a few quirks and talents that set me apart in some few areas. I know exactly what I'm capable of, but people seem to think I'm infallible and that bothers me.

WH, your confidence is the key. You project an air of confidence in your posts that makes us all sure that you know the answer, and that carries over into "If he doesn't know, I bet he'll be able to at least know where to look."

Tiggs has just started a slightly more insidious "popularity list" thread that makes some people feel left out -- or at least that's how some people are are seeing that thread.

Todd's pic alone is enough to give most of us men an inferiority complex, if we don't have one already.

I really don't think Tiggs ever intended for the thread to be anymore than an opportunity to put faces with names. Unfortunately, we humans bring our insecurities and our previous experiences with us everywhere, particularly when it comes to body image. I've noticed that the negative has all been self directed, unfortunately a reflection of the message we continuously receive from the media.

 

[Morden]

I personally think your wrong there harold. I don't look at it as a popularity contest at all. I don't see many people getting ticked or upset about some of the people in here who have a talent for writing. I mean isn't this whole board in essence a popularity competition? I write well does that make me better then anyone else on the board. I sure as hell hope not. I think that many of the woman on this board would love to be with any other guy on this board, but I know that the picture will NOT do the talking. I think to say that it is a popularity contest is totally wrong. The thread was meant for people that wanted to see what the people looked like who came to this board. I think it was a great idea even I didn't post my pic. As far as penal envy goes, sorry ain't buying it. That is a bunch of psychologically instilled crap force fed by the western view of sex. I don't have an incredibly large penis, but I know what I can do with it. Does it make a diference if you happen to be looking at pic of a man from this board rather then some over paid sex fiend in a picture he rehearsed for? I think you need to rethink your approach to those kind of threads if that is what you think.

 

[Angelus]

After reading every post in this thread I am really ashamed to say that I said that I was one of the ugly ones but all I can say now is hell no. There is only one person, besides the woman that I love that should be happy with the way that I look and that's me. So, I am saying that I really don't care what I look like anymore- I am happy with the way that I look although I do look slightly different now.

I think that the thread is a damn good idea as I know who I am writing with now. The thread is not really a popularity contest and whoever decided to make it so or thinks that it is is, sorry to say this nuts. And right now I am ranting away so forgive me but I had to get that off my chest.

 

[Weird Harold]

I personally think your wrong there harold. I don't look at it as a popularity contest at all.

I don't see it as a popularity contest per se, just that I see a lot of the same reactions as I see to the "my ten favorite literoticans" type of threads. It's not a "nobody loves me" reaction here, but a lot of "there ain't no way I can compete with that" sort of attitude. The responses to some pictures and lack of response to others can be hard on those with fragile egos and weak self esteem.

As far as penal envy goes, sorry ain't buying it. That is a bunch of psychologically instilled crap force fed by the western view of sex.

It's not so much what I personally feel about the thread, but what I see others feeling about the thread.

The inferiority complex comment was pretty much tongue in cheek, but almost a direct quote from more than one post on that thread as well.

morninggirl5 said:

WH, your confidence is the key. You project an air of confidence in your posts that makes us all sure that you know the answer, and that carries over into "If he doesn't know, I bet he'll be able to at least know where to look."

That's an age-old technique called "if you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit."

 

[Ally C]

Simply Me

Excellent point. It really does speak volumes for the way an emphasis is put on what we look like, as opposed to the sort of person we are. Places like Literotica provide a forum for everyone to participate on a fairly level playing field. The advent of personal pic posting isn't a bad thing, but it does highlight a less welcome part of the way many people judge others. I don't care what anyone here looks like, as I place a lot more emphasis on the written word.

 

[Angelus]

Hmmm, good point there Ally.... it is true that these boards are more about the written word and I for one love interacting with everyone in the threads that I participate in but I still have to say that it is cool to finally put a face to the name.

That is just my observation though.

 

[Simply Me]

I certainly do not think that Tiggs starting that thread was necessarily a bad thing. I admit that I enjoyed being able to put faces to people I have been talking with. What bothers me is that these same people whom I have interacted with in one way or another, are suddenly feeling less than accepted. And they admit that they are doing this to themselves. I've not seen anyone being cruel to a member here, we tend to be harder on ourselves than anyone else anyway. I simply wanted to remind everyone that we are all beautiful in our own way, and not everyone you meet is superficial. My soon to be ex is a good looking man, many think I'm crazy for not staying with him. But it goes far beyond looks, and the older I get, the more I realize this. If, and thats a big if, I ever marry again, it will be based on mutual interest, respect, the ability to laugh together, to talk about anything and everything, and the way he makes me feel just by looking at me. Not by the way he looks. And there are many men and women out there that feel exactly as I do.. I don't want this thread to turn into a battle ground. I would rather it stop now. And again I say to you all, you are a great bunch of people!

 

[Shylady]

Well I do enjoy looking at the pics, and putting names with faces.... among other things but i didn't think anyone was ugly, I was suprised that some people looked so young though.

 

[Morden]

I agree with some of what you said in a "this is reality and people ract this way stand point" wierd harold. I just wanted to let people know there was a nother view to the whole thread that those who think they did not get the praise they should might want to see. Just a rebuttal nothing personal. I understand that no matter what we say people will feel this way. I just think that they felt that way all along, and the worst that has happened is that thier fellow literotican's were not there to make fun or chuckle, but instead incourage and supost as all ways. I know we can't blame them for reacted to certain things like Outlaw or Todd, but we can accept that we have our own talents and a lot of those are all ready evident on the board as a whole.

<Grabs everyone for a big group hug and keeps you all tied up for awhile>

 

[Guest]

In the words of a song sung by Ray Stevens *hehe*

Everyone is beautiful.... in their own way....

 

[Morden]

<grabs Jaded and makes sure she is right beside him for the group hug.>

 

[freakygirl]

i only said i was ugly to go along with everyone else.. you see.. i really think i'm gods gift to everyone.. but i can't be too conceited.. i'm new.. and well it's my experience.. to be nice when you are new to a "group" on the net.. but see i've been here almost a week.. soooooooooooo i can now say.. i'm the most beautiful person in the world.. no one compares to me.. get at my feet.. and kiss them everyone... cherish me.. be my slaves!

ROTFLMAO.. ok.. back to seriousness.. i know i'm not the prettiest thing to walk the earth.. but i'm happy on the inside.. i have a husband who loves me.. kids that think i'm the shit.. and a fat ass that can work it.. What else is needed in life???