Jokes

[nasty]

I just read some of these jokes, and, wanted to share

1. 2 vultures each carrying 2 raccons boarded a plane. The stewardass said, "I'm sorry, gentlemen. Only one carrion/ passenger

2. An Eskimo in a Kayak was chilly, so, he lit a fire. Of course, it sank. Goes to show you, you can't have a kayak, and heat it, too.

You outta like this one, Gilly
3. A mother gave birth to twins, and decided to give them up for adoption. One went to Spain, and was named Juan. The other was sent to Egypt, and was named Ahmal. On Juan's 5th birthday, he decided to send his birthmother his picture. Elatted, she tells her husband, Now, only if I could see Ahmal. To this, the husband responded, Why? Their twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal.

Hope one of these made you laugh as much as I did. There's more, but, I can't remember them. I'll post them later.

 

[nasty]

One for the Season

2 chess players in a hotel lobby were talking over a tournament they were both just in. The Manager interrupted, saying, "I'm sorry, gentlemn. But, could you take this elsewhere? "Why?" one asked. "Because, I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

 

[nasty]

Ye, another one

2 weevils lived in S. Carolina in the field. One went to Hollywood, and became famous. The other stayed home, and didn't amount to anything. Naturally, he became known as the lesser of 2 weevils.

 

[pdx39]

Tasteless yet funny jokes

Q. What's the difference George W Bush and a bucket of shit?
A. The bucket.

Q. What's the difference between a Pinto and a Mercedes?
A. Lady Di wouldn't be caught dead in a Pinto.

Q. What do Pee Wee Herman and John Wilkes Booth have in common?
A. They both shoot people in the back of the head when at the theatere.

Q. What did Jeffery Dahmar say to Lorraina Bobbit?
A. Are you gonna eat that?

Q. What's the difference between a Wheat Thin and a lesbian?
A. One's a snack cracker, one's a crack snacker.

 

[bigrednz]

On day in Spain a group of Basque Seperatists went to the movies. The theater had only one door. there was a fire and everybody rushed for the exit, which was jammed because everyone was trying to get out at once. They all burned to death.

The moral of this story is: Don't put all your Basques in one exit.