It's That Time of Year Again ...

[kurrginatorX]

Yes, it's that time of year again when Christmas trees are lit, Nativity scenes can be found on the lawns of neighbors and churches alike, and leftist extreme pabulum pukers cry foul because everything is not tied up in a pretty little PC bow. This is not a thread about those butthurt asshats, though, but about a group that has become even more dangerous. I am talking about extreme atheists.

Before I go any further, allow me to say I am an atheist and have been for quite some time. The difference between me and about 95% of the atheists I meet or see in the media or even social media is that I don't get bent out of shape because there is a cross in the desert, just as I don't get offended by religious iconography at municipal buildings. More than that, however, is that the sight of a Nativity scene does not ignite the flames of passion within me and prompt me to demand that these be removed. In short, I have not turned my atheism into a religion, much less a crusade.

I understand the importance that religion has played in every society, every civilization since the dawn of humankind, and I respect that. Therefore, whether it is Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, or any other day(s) of celebration, Just let it happen.

 

[Hal9000_]

I don't get offended by religious iconography at municipal buildings.

How would you feel if you went to court and the judge had a big cross on their bench?

And you were there for illegal parking in front of a catholic church?

 

[Oblimo]

Nice to see an atheist pick the snowflake side of the War on Christmas for once, I guess.

 

[CandiCame]

Dude... athiests go to church and shit.

The fuck are you on about?

I mean, yeah there's no god but them Christians fry some good chicken. They sell Jesus doughnuts and shit.

 

[Hal9000_]

Dude... athiests go to church and shit.

The fuck are you on about?

I mean, yeah there's no god but them Christians fry some good chicken. They sell Jesus doughnuts and shit.

You're going to be struck by lightning. Indoors.

 

[CandiCame]

You know what legitimately pisses me off about Christians?

Why the fuck can't yhall make a good movie? Like legit what the actual fuck is it about loving Jesus that makes you incapable of visual storytelling?

You can give those same stories to a secular studio and a religious studio, and the secular studio will make Prince of Egypt, and the religious studio will make Joshua and the Promised Land.

Yhall got good stories to work with how do you fuck up so consistently? Why are all your children's mascots fucking horrifying? I've taught Sunday School and you people give me NOTHING to work with. Why does Psalty have a rape dog?

What is it about Jesus that makes yhall incapable of creating decent programming?

I don't even like Veggietales like FUCK get your shit together.

 

[CandiCame]

You're going to be struck by lightning. Indoors.

If Christians don't make delicious chicken and terrible movies may god strike me dead.

 

[Hal9000_]

Really?

Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

or The Life of Brian?

 

[CandiCame]

I actually have taught Sunday School kind of a lot and I have so much to say about Christian Children's programming meant to be shown in Sunday School like it's all so bad and some of it is straight up furry porn and like...

All yhall kids who went to church when I taught Sunday School I swear to god I didn't know it was softcore furry porn, it was supposed to be Noah's Arc and then we were IN it and I didn't want to turn it off.

 

[Hal9000_]

I actually have taught Sunday School kind of a lot

jesus christ. tell me you were not wearing womens panties.

 

[CandiCame]

Really?

Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

or The Life of Brian?

Monty Python is a secular studio. So is Dreamworks and The Production Company. Christians have hella good stories but collectively terrible production skills for reasons that completely escape me.

You should see some of the shit they put out.

Secular studio can move an anthiest to tears like, "Fuck man, maybe there is a god, I don't know, Ramses it's your baby brother let the slaves go, goddamn!"

But Christian production companies can't do shit.

God, every song in Prince of Egypt was amazing.

 

[someoneyouknow]

I understand the importance that religion has played in every society, every civilization since the dawn of humankind, and I respect that. Therefore, whether it is Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, or any other day(s) of celebration, Just let it happen.

Fine. Good point. Now let us know when the Christians don't get bent out of shape when someone doesn't say Merry Christmas or thinks their religion is being affronted because a company doesn't have christmassy icons on their products.

https://www.cnbc.com/2015/11/09/starbucks-holiday-red-cup-brews-controversy-on-social-media.html

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/20/style/starbucks-gay-agenda.html

I don't hear any of the other Big Four religions whining when someone doesn't acknowledge their traditions.

 

[CandiCame]

jesus christ. tell me you were not wearing womens panties.

The "Sunday" ones with the little cat on them.

 

[CandiCame]

Here's a true fact, I once accidentially taught an entire class that Sampson of biblical fame was the rock because I talked myself into a corner. I was trying to explain super strength and after the lesson when I gave the test the first question was "Who is Sampson?" And I'll be goddamned if them little fuckers didn't write "The Rock" almost exclusively.

Give me that movie, Hollywood. All of it. I want dead lions full of bees. I want Dwayne the Rock Johnson to kill a whole company of soldiers with a fucking goat skull or donkey skull (i'm drunk, like full disclosure I can't remember) I want the whole thing with his first wife and the murder rampage- I'm not talking Sampson and Delilah, fuck that bitch and fuck him for being dumb enough to fall for her dumb bitch bullshit, I want to before fall shit.

God that motherfucker was dumb as hell but he came by it honestly like his parents ate the dead-lion-full-of-bees honey knowing goddamn well it came from a cat corpse what the fuck even is the bible

 

[CandiCame]

BTWs, I'm not joking about the furry porn. I realized that sounded like a goof but it's NOT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eky1W6FWJYE

There's NO INDICATION AT THE BEGINNING THAT IT'S GONNA TURN INTO THIS. AT ALL. IT STARTS OFF NORMAL NOAH'S ARK.

 

[Hal9000_]

Here's a true fact, I once accidentially taught an entire class that Sampson of biblical fame was the rock because I talked myself into a corner.

Worst story ever.

So is sampson and delilah.

Well, except the part where he tore down the temple walls.

herecles is so much more interesting. christians always have to dull things down.

 

[CandiCame]

Worst story ever.

So is sampson and delilah.

Well, except the part where he tore down the temple walls.

herecles is so much more interesting. christians always have to dull things down.

Dude Sampson has EVERYTHING. I love that story. Like, as written. It's normally abridged heavily but like that dude was crazy as fuuuuuck. Throwing gates at motherfuckers and banging whores and shit like Hercules was also cool. They'd be bros.

 

[Hal9000_]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBYb6N794AQ

If I had my way, I would tear this old building down.
Well Delilah was a woman, she was fine and fair,
She had good looks, God knows, and coal black hair,
Delilah she gained old Samson's mind.
When first he saw this woman, you know he couldn't believe his mind.
Delilah she climbed up on Samson's knee,
Said tell me where your strength lies if you please.
She spoke so kind and she talked so fair,
Well Samson said, Delilah cut off my hair.
You can shave my head, clean as my hand
And my strength will become as natural as any old man.
If I had my way, if I had my way, if I had my way,
I would tear this old building down.
You read about Samson, all from his works,
He was the strongest man that ever had lived on earth.
One day when Samson was walking along,
Looked down on the ground, he saw an old jawbone.
He stretched out his arm, God knows, chains broke like thread,
When he got to moving, ten thousand was dead.
If I had my way, if I had my way, if I had my way,
I would tear this old building down.
Now Samson and the lion, they got in a tack,
Samson he crawled up on the lion's back.
You read about this lion, he killed a man with his paws,
But Samson got his hands around that lion's jaws.
He ripped the beast till he killed him dead.
The bees made honey in the lion's head.
If I had my way, if I had my way, if I had my way,
I would tear this old building down.

 

[pantalaimonlyra]

I say Merry Christmas as a greeting this time of year, mostly out of habit, but also because I do celebrate Christmas. I'm sorely tempted to stop, not because I get reprimanded for using it, but because when I do say it, inevitablely some asshole will then stop and talk to me for 10 minutes about how happy they are that I didn't say happy holidays.

 

[Hal9000_]

I say Merry Christmas as a greeting this time of year, mostly out of habit, but also because I do celebrate Christmas. I'm sorely tempted to stop, not because I get reprimanded for using it, but because when I do say it, inevitablely some asshole will then stop and talk to me for 10 minutes about how happy they are that I didn't say happy holidays.

Jesus weeps.

 

[Oblimo]

Dude... athiests go to church and shit.

The fuck are you on about?

I mean, yeah there's no god but them Christians fry some good chicken. They sell Jesus doughnuts and shit.

Yeah, but I’ve never heard a professed atheist share the US Evangelical siege mentality, the original snowflakery, before.

 

[CandiCame]

I say Merry Christmas as a greeting this time of year, mostly out of habit, but also because I do celebrate Christmas. I'm sorely tempted to stop, not because I get reprimanded for using it, but because when I do say it, inevitablely some asshole will then stop and talk to me for 10 minutes about how happy they are that I didn't say happy holidays.

I like to mix it up, throw in a "Joyous Solstice!" a "Happy Haunikua" or a "Get tore the fuck UP this Saturnalia!"

 

[CandiCame]

Yeah, but I’ve never heard a professed atheist share the US Evangelical siege mentality, the original snowflakery, before.

Sounds like somebody trying to get some Christian dick. Or pussy. Not here to judge.

 

[pantalaimonlyra]

I like to mix it up, throw in a "Joyous Solstice!" a "Happy Haunikua" or a "Get tore the fuck UP this Saturnalia!"

I'll toss them into my repertoire.

 

[KeithD]

"Merry" seems an awfully frivolous word for Christians to want to be using for what Christmas is supposed to mean to them. So, I can't really see a Christian with any intelligence (so, someone other than the Evangelicals) getting tied up in knots in insisting on a "Merry Christmas."