is the BDSM board dying?

[loves2spank]

I have been here on and off for many years, the BDSM boards seems to be getting less used, I was just wondering why people thought that may be?

I don't have any answers just curious as to what people think.

 

[KG89]

I dont think so, it's mostly a place for Dominants and Submissive's tonplace an ad. Usually any submissive ad gets by the ton while most Dominant's apend weeks to months waiting or looking for a submissive.

I recently finally got a submissive to call my own, after months of constant bumping of my ad and going through the few submissive's intrigued enough to even PM or respond.

So not dead, just slow thanks to the nature of the kink and lifestyle.

 

[Con_Trol]

My Theory

Yes it is dying. Years ago there were more women here. I used to start a thread and explain what I wanted and there would be at least 5 to 10 women who responded. Today it's often 0 to 2. If you get 1 or 2, they are now usually one liners (aka dumb ass women) who I don't want anyway.

The intelligent women have left. Years ago I had many smart and very sexual women here, to name a few: Two doctors, one national radio host, a successful inventor, and many women extremely intelligent. Those relationships lasted months and years. It was fun, not so much anymore, and as a result I'm not here often.

My theory is that so many "Doms" are pathetic or faking. The women respond, get turned off and frustrated and then never return. So the "Doms" have been their own worse enemy. Sad, but like anything else, people fuck it up.

 

[KG89]

I don't agree, while i have spent the last 3 months with an advert, i have received quite a few PMs. Most have been fruitless ofc since submissive's are just as picky as Dominant's are.

Most of the submissive's i have spoken to thag has lasted more then "1 liners" as u say have been those that are in respectable work feilds.

Sure i think us Dominant's have become are worst enemy, but it's also part technology. Forums are slow in comparison to current tech. So it's a mixture.

 

[Con_Trol]

Response Decline

My responses going from 5 to 10 responses and some of where I have connected with very intelligent women to mostly 0 to 2 dumb ass responses tells me all I need to know. Lit is not the source for this anymore. You could be right on the technology change and possibly also what I call the Twitter mentality which is the inability to focus beyond one or two lines. That is why I refuse to begin anything with younger women.

Congrats if you somehow get the same amount of intelligent responses as you used to, if so you are an exception. I have been doing this for many years and I don't see it here anymore. To me it seems the intelligent women have left, probably too much bullshit around. It was fun while it lasted.

Good luck.

 

[KG89]

I'm currently in with a complete newbie, i think the issue is also ur frustrated, i understand that completely. I been feeling that way for some time. With how pretty most submissive's who are infact worthwhile are either taken or have left.

But im crazy since I prefer these older sites, the new shit is quick & fast and not so fun imho.

 

[Lostgirl5960]

Perhaps not all the intelligent ones or the worthwhile ones have left. It is possible they haven't seen your ad or ads, or they did and just were not into what you are.

There is also the fact you alluded to that there are many fake and wannabe doms on here. And that gets very frustrating to a submissive trying to make a real connection

And yes submissives can be just as picky as doms. Why shouldn't we be?

 

[Con_Trol]

I'm currently in with a complete newbie, i think the issue is also ur frustrated, i understand that completely. I been feeling that way for some time. With how pretty most submissive's who are infact worthwhile are either taken or have left.

But im crazy since I prefer these older sites, the new shit is quick & fast and not so fun imho.

You have the wrong guy if you think I'm frustrated. My standards are high and when I see lower level woman responding it's disappointing, but not frustrating. Frustration is when it interferes with my life, this does not.

I agree things are quicker and faster these days, proven with the one and two line responses I receive. I imagine things are probably also quick and fast during sex, how sad is that? I prefer details and getting to know people, seems that's out of date in today's online world. Too bad, they are missing out.

As for a complete newbie, I'm glad you have the patience for that, I find they are skittish so I prefer older and with a bit of experience. Good luck.

 

[Con_Trol]

Perhaps not all the intelligent ones or the worthwhile ones have left. It is possible they haven't seen your ad or ads, or they did and just were not into what you are.

There is also the fact you alluded to that there are many fake and wannabe doms on here. And that gets very frustrating to a submissive trying to make a real connection

And yes submissives can be just as picky as doms. Why shouldn't we be?

My posts have always been in the same spots, years ago I got huge responses and from mostly intelligent women. Now, few responses and one and two liners at that and from no so intelligent women (I'm trying to be politically correct here, although I'm usually not).

I completely understand that a woman may not be into what I am, but I'm comparing to years ago when I had lots of responses from basically the same demented posts I have always posted (half kidding there).

I hear you on the fake doms so I think I can understand the disappointment in trying to find the right one. Of course, subs should be just as picky as doms. Why not?

 

[featheredfaith]

It might behoove you to post in the BDSM discussion boards and get into conversations. Many of the people there are very interesting and knowledgeable. The more involved and invested in the community you become, the more trusted you will be, and the more seriously you will be taken. There are also a few other sites that tend to cater to intelligence better than this one does. There is a site for everything, it caters to a very specific clientele or audience. The audience on this site, and in this section isn't the one you are looking to find, so you need to find where that audience is, rather than hoping to catch a leopard in Chicago.

Good luck.
#not looking#

 

[sally_sparrow]

I don't know that it is dying, but maybe people are looking elsewhere for connections. I have connected with a few Doms over the last few months. We're all looking for specific things so it doesn't always pan out exactly how we want.

I recently connected with a switch by chance through an unrelated thread and have been pleasantly surprised at where it is heading. We'll see, you never know what you will find and where it will lead.

Sometimes I don't post as much as I would like to because I don't want the unsolicited, unrelated PMs.

Fear not, all intelligent women are not gone yet.