Is it real...

[inkyprimal]

If after working 8-16 hours, I come home and the first thing he wants is sex, even though the house is a mess, no dinner is made, we both have children to take care of and when I just nicely to just take care of home first, I'm disobeying

Plus, as you say, kids take first priority, followed by food, then house. Then sex.

 

[_lonelykitten69]

I never tell people what to do but omg I'd totally recommend you leave this asap. Not respecting your safe words? The Police???? Unless you've specified that you want this treatment, unless it's consensual....don't stay where you don't feel safe. A good Dom will help test and alter your limits, but not totally ignore them.

Thank you. I tried to explain that to him but was ignored. But he has now moved out.

 

[dilipfrmindia]

Thank you. I tried to explain that to him but was ignored. But he has now moved out.

I am glad it is solved.

And why would the police be called and how did you people handle the situation ?

Pushing limits is one thing - ignoring the safe word is another. By pushing limits you sometimes reach depths you never did or thought possible but that definitely needs to be done with time and if the dom is not interested in spending that much time, it is better to be lonely kitten is all I feel like what everyone have said earlier.

There should be something in the whole relationship for you ... if you don't feel happy at the end of it, if you don't feel satisfied or some kind of 'oneness' with whatever you are doing / experiencing, it is time to review or go for change.

Now that change has come and it is good to know.

~~
Me

 

[Dom4uinLvNv]

Now that he is out, First ask yourself what you desire.Then move forward. If you have questions PM me. I have no desire to be your Dom. You need to learn how to search for a proper Dom if it is the lifestyle you desire.
Him moving out was a good choice.You need to understand he won't change. So look elsewhere.

 

[Primalex]

Now that he is out, First ask yourself what you desire.Then move forward. If you have questions PM me.

Why not just ask the questions here? And who are you that you possess the universal wisdom?

 

[ToPleaseHim]

Why not just ask the questions here? And who are you that you possess the universal wisdom?

Maybe he is the Dom4u for her?

 

[Anonymaso]

Oh shit, didn't realise this thread was two pages long. Ignore me.

What (mostly) everyone has said. As a side note, his referring to online reading matter to justify ignoring your safeword - which is you withdrawing consent - that is batshit insanity. If that's this man's idea of logic you really do need to GTFO. A D/s agreement should be agreed between you and him, not him and the fucking interwebz. If he's got an ounce of sense he knows damn well he's talking bollocks, he's just grandstanding to try anything that will sound like justification to you.

Also, whether the kids are there or not is irrelevant. If you end up having an awkward chat down the police station where does that leave your kids exactly? What the hell do you think they're learning about relationships from you? Kink should never be exposed to minors unable to differentiate between a consensual (not that it is) dynamic and domestic abuse.

He has violated your consent by ignoring your safeword. Punishment or not it's bullshit. If your neighbours are getting concerned enough to involve the police, it's a safe bet these punishments are just excuses to abuse you and ignore the limits you have set.

Get the fuck out, then direct him here to argue his case, because I have a funny feeling he'll get fucking eviscerated by this lot.

If you do leave, this could get nasty. If you're scared to leave, reach out to local domestic abuse services/charities. Plan your exit and keep yourself and your kids safe. Do not let him know where you've gone. You can still talk via phone or email without him knowing where you live.

 

[_lonelykitten69]

I want to thank everyone for your replies and words of wisdom. I am no longer involved with this individual

 

[M_SNashCouple]

Yes. Leave. Now. Especially with children involved. Because it's now abuse. Run, don't walk.

 

[BBbumboy]

Consent, consent consent consent. I cannot possibly express that more. Non consent is sexual abuse!

 

[Lord_Steve]

Why not just ask the questions here? And who are you that you possess the universal wisdom?

chug a concrete pill instanter

 

[Lord_Steve]

I want to thank everyone for your replies and words of wisdom. I am no longer involved with this individual

good. respect yourself.

 

[Que]

Entirely too many people come to the conclusion if they simply declare themselves a dominant they will get this sex they want on their terms. This happens because entirely too many submissives buy it.

 

[richard_daily]

What?........

.....

Please ignore him, he's clearly got some abusive tendencies.