Inexperienced submissive F, need some guidance

[goodgirlLin]

Hey,

I would love to hear some tips on how to start an online dom sub relationship with someone who understands that I’m quite new but very eager to learn? I’ve tried it but it went too quick and I panicked a bit and pulled back. I know I want to, just feel overwhelmed when it goes too fast. Does that make sense?

 

[NateGrey]

Sounds very natural, especially if you're new to it. Nothing wrong with pulling back a bit and asking him/her to slow it down. They should understand.

 

[Axill]

Hey,

I would love to hear some tips on how to start an online dom sub relationship with someone who understands that I’m quite new but very eager to learn? I’ve tried it but it went too quick and I panicked a bit and pulled back. I know I want to, just feel overwhelmed when it goes too fast. Does that make sense?

No way to pm you?

 

[goodgirlLin]

Sounds very natural, especially if you're new to it. Nothing wrong with pulling back a bit and asking him/her to slow it down. They should understand.

Thank you for replying. He understood but wouldn’t let up, every session he would push too hard too far and I am wondering if that is how you move forward? I don’t mind pushing my boundaries, I welcome it but felt a disconnect with his needs.

 

[NateGrey]

Thank you for replying. He understood but wouldn’t let up, every session he would push too hard too far and I am wondering if that is how you move forward? I don’t mind pushing my boundaries, I welcome it but felt a disconnect with his needs.

It's fine line to walk. Of course part of it is to push the sub's boundaries a bit, but his approach sounds like it was a bit too heavy handed for you. And instead of changing his approach he just kept at it.

 

[Wolfie605]

Thank you for replying. He understood but wouldn’t let up, every session he would push too hard too far and I am wondering if that is how you move forward? I don’t mind pushing my boundaries, I welcome it but felt a disconnect with his needs.

No it isn't how you move forward. A good dom and submissive relationship is about trust. Right now he is betraying that trust and pushing to hard to fast

 

[goodgirlLin]

No way to pm you?

I think I’ve fixed that now?

 

[Wolfie605]

It's fine line to walk. Of course part of it is to push the sub's boundaries a bit, but his approach sounds like it was a bit too heavy handed for you. And instead of changing his approach he just kept at it.

Like to me seems like guy might not really know what he is doing

 

[goodgirlLin]

It's fine line to walk. Of course part of it is to push the sub's boundaries a bit, but his approach sounds like it was a bit too heavy handed for you. And instead of changing his approach he just kept at it.

Yeah, I did try to explain that but he says it is his method. Thanks for the reply and feedback, I think maybe I need to rethink things

 

[goodgirlLin]

No it isn't how you move forward. A good dom and submissive relationship is about trust. Right now he is betraying that trust and pushing to hard to fast

Thank you for that, I had a feeling it wasn’t right but I also wondered if maybe it just wasn’t for me

 

[NateGrey]

Yeah, I did try to explain that but he says it is his method. Thanks for the reply and feedback, I think maybe I need to rethink things

I'd offer to take a shot at taking his place , but unfortunately I can't commit the time to properly build up such a relationship right now. Feel free to PM me though if you have specific questions or want to talk about it more.

 

[goodgirlLin]

I'd offer to take a shot at taking his place , but unfortunately I can't commit the time to properly build up such a relationship right now. Feel free to PM me though if you have specific questions or want to talk about it more.

Thank you I appreciate the reply. I like the feeling of my heart racing and discovering things but when the connection feels rushed, it’s hard and it’s good to read that I wasn’t being silly

 

[goodgirlLin]

Thanks for the advice and feedback. Just to be clear, and not to offend anyone, but I’m not looking for a dom right now, like within the next 5 minutes . I appreciate all the messages but thought I should mention that

 

[CuriousRick]

Thanks for the advice and feedback. Just to be clear, and not to offend anyone, but I’m not looking for a dom right now. I appreciate all the messages but thought I should mention that

Good luck in your search!

 

[Utmale48]

Thank you for replying. He understood but wouldn’t let up, every session he would push too hard too far and I am wondering if that is how you move forward? I don’t mind pushing my boundaries, I welcome it but felt a disconnect with his needs.

If you felt a disconnect that may be the problem. He may not be the right Dom for you.

 

[Good_girl_4_u]

Hey,

I would love to hear some tips on how to start an online dom sub relationship with someone who understands that I’m quite new but very eager to learn? I’ve tried it but it went too quick and I panicked a bit and pulled back. I know I want to, just feel overwhelmed when it goes too fast. Does that make sense?

It makes complete sense, I am also relatively new,

 

[matureman32]

Hey,

I would love to hear some tips on how to start an online dom sub relationship with someone who understands that I’m quite new but very eager to learn? I’ve tried it but it went too quick and I panicked a bit and pulled back. I know I want to, just feel overwhelmed when it goes too fast. Does that make sense?

It does.If you would like to chat further come and say hi.

 

[goodgirlLin]

It makes complete sense, I am also relatively new,

Thanks for your reply How are you finding it?

 

[J D Danger]

Hey,

I would love to hear some tips on how to start an online dom sub relationship with someone who understands that I’m quite new but very eager to learn? I’ve tried it but it went too quick and I panicked a bit and pulled back. I know I want to, just feel overwhelmed when it goes too fast. Does that make sense?

if you are still looking for advice or guidance feel free to DM me anytime with any questions

 

[J D Danger]

It makes complete sense, I am also relatively new,

DM me anytime if you would like to chat

 

[WetSubGirl]

Thank you for replying. He understood but wouldn’t let up, every session he would push too hard too far and I am wondering if that is how you move forward? I don’t mind pushing my boundaries, I welcome it but felt a disconnect with his needs.

Do you discuss you needs, wants and boundaries with your playmate?

 

[WetSubGirl]

Yeah, I did try to explain that but he says it is his method. Thanks for the reply and feedback, I think maybe I need to rethink things

Well... next!

 

[goodgirlLin]

Do you discuss you needs, wants and boundaries with your playmate?

I’ve broken off that connection but previously I’ve not done that. I am now realising I didn’t get what I wanted because I didn’t communicate it. Just let him lead my anywhere, bit naive *shrug*

 

[JennyCapricorn]

Thank you for that, I had a feeling it wasn’t right but I also wondered if maybe it just wasn’t for me

My experience on both sides is that it’s not the Dommes job to take what she wants. It’s to give the Sub what she needs. Ideally those two things are the same but when they aren’t the Domme is the one with the power, which means they have the responsibility to do the right thing.

When you give the Sub what she needs you get soooo much back.

 

[WetSubGirl]

I’ve broken off that connection but previously I’ve not done that. I am now realising I didn’t get what I wanted because I didn’t communicate it. Just let him lead my anywhere, bit naive *shrug*

That's an important insight!