I'm being spammed by beatnik poets!

[NoJo]

This is the latest mail they sent me, subject line

FIFTH THIRD BANK: URGENT SECURITY NOTIFICATION FOR CLIENT OF THE BANK


Do you understand that? catch autistic "Africa! Her
pulsing throat had swelled up like an inner-tube, and her mouth was
writhing. she'll be driving six white horses when she COMES! SUPPORT THE
SIDEWINDER BLUE DEVILS, it read. And his buttocks. "Why. "She stood only
a second, then went to the door, unbarred it, and threw it open. He had
dreamed that Annie Wilkes was Scheherazade, her solid body clad in
diaphanous robes, her big feet stuffed into pink sequined slippers with
curly toes as she rode on her magic carpet and chanted the incantatory
phrases which open the doors of the best stories. crotch


--- pure genius, man.

 

[Guest]

sorry joe...
i swear ill only write when im sober.

 

[rgraham666]

Damn. Why can't I get spam that interesting?

 

[NoJo]

Damn. Why can't I get spam that interesting?

Just include your email address in your sig line, that should open the floodgates.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

*snaps fingers* cool.

It almost makes me want to send them my bank account number.

 

[NoJo]

Hey, Daddy-Os, Here's latest mail from those crazy hopped-up guys at FIFTH THIRD BANK 2006:


They would have fallen on me like an avalanche.
catastrophic bowdoin There was another difference as well. "He would not
voice to her the unspoken hope at the back of his mind, a hope which
seemed to him almost as monstrous as his fears. When they were gone,
Annie came to his room. or — Ian groaned hoarsely, and Hezekiah gripped
his arm. That book, he said, would outsell even Misery's Return.
"Africa! He made the mistake of reading the scene where Garp's younger
son dies, impaled on a gearshift ]ever, shortly before bed. He thought
her illness might have been short indeed — a thunderclap coronary, say,
followed by a trip to Saint Joe's, followed by. Butyl.


That one-word sentence at the end says it all -- It's a sad yet scathing commentary on the warmonging petroleum industry that fuels global hate.

 

[Liar]

Got this yesterday:

Had there been the days work only to contend with, she would not have complained. Emmy, unasked, wrote begging to be allowed to help care for poor darling Uncle. Figures seemed just to fall into line and to add up of themselves. Get old of em somehow, and give em no quarter. Here Lucie put her mouth inside his ear and whispered guiltily I dont blieve youre a bit glad! Not till daybreak was she joined by one of her own sex. Im on my way, too, to see a sick person, but Ill take my chance of getting a lift later in the day. But there wasnt, only just long, straight roads. It certainly WAS hard though, to keep on being sorry, when you saw how glad Mamma was. Whats laws for, Id like to know, if not to be got round? The skin of her face felt stretched: like a mask that was too tight for it. Their concern was entirely for her, her personal safety,and that of her children. Never in her life had she fought for anything as now for Richards freedom. My friend, a great fighter has been lost in you.

Heartfelt, if somewhat cnfusing, storytelling.

 

[glynndah]

That does explain the name of the bank. They can't reduce fractions, but they write one hell of an stream of consciousness rap.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I'll trade you two penis extension ads for one of your good spams, Joe

 

[3113]

Cool, Daddy-O (joins scarlet in snap-fingered applause)

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

It's got a good beat--easy to dance to--I'll give it an 8.

Rumple Foreskin

 

[Stella_Omega]

In today's spam folder, I found some wonderful titles;

• 
  [*] ladybug impervious
  [*]extremist husk
  [*]municipality bloodstain
  [*]fiddle fence

The subjects were mostly uninspirational, but this one sentence caught my eye;

Her voice implied that Valancy had died of a cold several times already.
which I googled, and discovered this story; The Blue Castle

Time on my hands? Why do you ask?

 

[The_Fool]

In today's spam folder, I found some wonderful titles;

• 
  [*] ladybug impervious
  [*]extremist husk
  [*]municipality bloodstain
  [*]fiddle fence

The subjects were mostly uninspirational, but this one sentence caught my eye;

Her voice implied that Valancy had died of a cold several times already.
which I googled, and discovered this story; The Blue Castle

Time on my hands? Why do you ask?

ladybug impervious
to my charms
written in sanskrit
for my own edification

I can't help my extremist views,
left me a husk
of a man
hoisted by my hubris

challenged yet another municipality
to offer their funds for beatification
that they read as beautification
left bloodstains on painted walls

offer me a fiddle to play
and a fence to sit on
while I watch the world burn
complacent in my own ineptitude

 

[NoJo]

ladybug impervious
to my charms
written in sanskrit
for my own edification

I can't help my extremist views,
left me a husk
of a man
hoisted by my hubris

challenged yet another municipality
to offer their funds for beatification
that they read as beautification
left bloodstains on painted walls

offer me a fiddle to play
and a fence to sit on
while I watch the world burn
complacent in my own ineptitude

Fool you aint. Ferlinghetti more like.

 

[The_Fool]

Fool you aint. Ferlinghetti more like.

Thanks Joe. One day I will get there.....