If someone that you love dearly dies before you get a final chance

[*bratcat*]

 

[freescorfr]

Sorry to hear that Brat. I pray that she takes her place among the stars of the universe.

 

[SexySlut2]

Sorry to hear that your grandmother passed away, but at least she is at peace and no longer in pain.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

.

 

[plasticman33]

I know what she meant to you, Cat. My prayers are with you, hon. She's in a better place now, no more pain or suffering. Don't be too hard on yourself. , Me

 

[dreamer]

Thoghts and prayers coming your way. This past fall my stepfather (dad), died. I had just recently moved home after my fiancee broke things off and I was here when it happened. Just like you, I know he knew how I felt. I take comfort in that.

How to deal with guilt/remorse...try to accept the rational side of your brain. You 'know' you shouldn't feel guilty. But it's hard to 'feel' that. Let yourself grieve. You will feel horrible, probably for quite some time. But keep reminding your heart with your head. Live the kind of life she would have wanted you to, and don't be afraid to talk to her on occasion. I know that helps my mom sometimes.

Hang in there, best wishes to you and your family.

 

[Guest]

i dont know...

 

[fillmup]

Bless you bratcat! My condolences.

 

[*ladylove*]

Bratcat, I understand, I lost my grandmother who I was very close to not so long ago too. I wasn't there when she passed, she was asleep. Like you I felt guilty for not being there, but keep in mind that she felt and knew your love for her. Telling her again isn't what matters, its the fact that she already knew that. And the funeral is a part of closure, if you can't attend, then maybe a different sort of closure could be yours and hers alone. Wether it be visiting her grave and telling her how you feel, or doing something that will keep her remembrence alive for you. And always remember that tears help to mend the heart, so if you need to cry just let it flow.

*ladylove*

 

[*bratcat*]

thanks everyone...

 

[Wave_Rider]

Just a Suggestion, for what it's worth...............

Not sure if you have thought of doing this but its worked for me twice in my life. Sit down and using your stationary, tell your grandmother everything you wish you could say to her face; Let every emotion out through your words. Talk of old memories; Tell her of any injustice you felt. Inotherwards..........SAY GOODBYE, in any manner you desire.

When you are finished, put it in an envelope. Since it seems the city she is going to be buried in, is further than a car ride, take your note to somewhere near you, that you find "peaceful" and leave it there. Walk away with a smile on your face, and contentment in your heart.

As I said.........its just a suggestion..........but it works......

I'll think a kind thought tonight........for you and your family

 

[truegentleman]

First let me say that I am sorry for your loss.


I went through the same thing when my father passed away and I still don't have the answer.

You can do like wave_rider said and write your feelings down, that helped me a little bit.

I still feel bad about not being able to say goodbye. That is one of the things that I wish I could change in my past.

 

[sabbathstorm]

I'm very sorry that you didn't get your chance to say goodbye. I've been through a similar thing with my stepfather. He was very ill and I was going to go see him on the weekend with his grandson (who meant the world to him). I didn't get a chance to go down because something else came up. He died not soon after and I felt guilty about that for a while.

Over time, I came to accept the fact that he wanted to go without anyone around. He basically "waited" until my mother left for the night to go.

Wave_Rider, that's an excellent idea. It is good to get everything out.