If I were...

kotori

Fool of Fortune
Joined
Oct 9, 2001
Posts
28,474
___________, I could ___________.

(Fill 'em, folks.)
 
If I were an airplane, I could be in Chicago in an hour.

If I were a dog, I could probably sleep all day.

If I were native-born, I could be President.
 
If I were a millionaire I'd never work and lay on the beach naked everyday.
 
kotori said:
If I were an airplane, I could be in Chicago in an hour.
But you couldn't land at what we used to call Miegs field, because Mayor Fucknut Daley sent city crews at 1:30 in the morning on April first to bulldoze the runways, even though there were planes there and he violated laws by not notifying the FAA in advance. Not that I'm bitter or anything.
 
kotori said:
___________, I could ___________.

(Fill 'em, folks.)

If I were in a pub in New York, as of May first , I could look at my cigarette , but I couldn't smoke it. Fucking assholes.
 
If I were a hammock, I could rock all day...
 
Midway would work, O'Hare would actually be best. I used to have a Cessna program that had you taking off and landing at Miegs.
 
If I were smarter I could be done with my homework now
 
Hmmmmm.....

If I were...
energenic, I could do aerobics.


Naaaawwww, pass me the remote!
 
Re: Hmmmmm.....

Lost Cause said:
If I were...
energenic, I could do aerobics.


Naaaawwww, pass me the remote!
Is that something like energeneric? That might be strange...
 
If I were debt-free, I could live exactly where I want to.
 
I were independently wealthy I'd travel wherever I liked
 
kotori said:
___________, I could ___________.

(Fill 'em, folks.)

If I were given every single opportunity, I could honestly say I would not change my world.

(That's my world peoples, before we get all upset about international stuff).;)
 
If I were with my grandma I could hug her and kiss her goodnight.
 
If I were in Toronto, I could make chicken soup for a sick friend
 
If I were a wine, I'd be a vermouth... and I could trickle so slowly over the curve of your lips
 
If I was a man I could pee standing up and not wet the seat - much.
 
If I had some leisure time I could be in Florence eating wonderful food, shopping in great stores and enjoying the charm...
 
If I were a rich man,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
If I were a biddy-biddy rich,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle man.

I'd build a big tall house with rooms by the dozen
Right in the middle of the town,
A fine tin roof with real wooden floors below.
There would be one long staircase just going up
And one even longer coming down,
And one more leading nowhere, just for show.

I'd fill my yard with chicks and turkeys and geese
And ducks for the town to see and hear,
Squawking just as noisily as they can,
And each loud "pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack! pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack!"
Would land like a trumpet on the ear,
As if to say, "Here lives a wealthy man."
Oy!

If I were a rich man,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
If I were a biddy-biddy rich,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle man.

I see my wife, my Golde, looking like a rich man's wife,
With a proper double chin,
Supervising meals to her heart's delight.
I see her putting on airs and strutting like a peacock,
Oy! What a happy mood she's in,
Screaming at the servants day and night.

The most important men in town will come to fawn on me--
They will ask me to advise them,
Like a Solomon the Wise--
"If you please, Reb Tevye?"--
"Pardon me, Reb Tevye?"--
Posing problems that would cross a rabbi's eyes--
(chanting) Ya va voy, ya va voy voy vum...
And it won't make one bit of difference
If I answer right or wrong--
When you're rich, they think you really know.

If I were rich, I'd have the time that I lack
To sit in the synagogue and pray,
And maybe have a seat by the Eastern wall,
And I'd discuss the learned books with the holy men
Seven hours every day--
That would be the sweetest thing of all...
Oy!

If I were a rich man,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
Lord who made the lion and the lamb,
You decreed I should be what I am--
Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan,
If I were a wealthy man?
 
I was waiting for that response ! :)

The next thought was PPM,

If I was a song
I'd sing it in the morning
I'd sing it in the evening,
all over the day...

I'd sing out love between my brothers and my sisters
 
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