Ideas/inspiration needed please

[B_Lloyd]

I am planning to give my boyfriend a bdsm session as this is something he particularly enjoys.
We explore and enjoy various fantasies together. We are not into any kind of full time bdsm lifestyle and this one is more of a deserved treat for him.
I would be grateful for any ideas as to what I could do to/with him. I’ve read a few forums and we’ve practiced a little so I am aware of the basics, safety and the usual. We also have quite a large ‘kinky box’ so toys and basic restraints aren’t a problem.
Any ideas would be great and an ample selection I or others could choose from would be fantastic. I have trouble imagining devious and cruel or sadistic things, probably because I’m too nice so I probably could have been meaner in previous scenarios where I’m in control therefore ideas leaning this way are also very welcome.
I am not very confident, a little bit self conscious and am not naturally dominant. Scenarios that involve talking a lot or saying things in a certain way wouldn’t be as comfortable for me. And as bad as it may sound; the more simple, low energy and things that don’t require me to ‘perform’ (for lack of a better word) the better.
In this context:
I like: As above, CBT and attention to my feet.
He likes: teasing, tease and denial, bondage, legs, ankles, feet, toes, shoes/boots, smelly feet/shoes/socks, light pain and light humiliation.
Neither of us like anything to do with the anus.
Thank you very much for you time and suggestions.

 

[unregistered]

 

[B_Lloyd]

That's ok. Yes it would be me in control. I’m female. Thanks.

 

[unregistered]

 

[B_Lloyd]

Hi.
Yes, this one is more of a treat for him. Understanding the broader nature of ‘BDSM’ it was just ideas in the outlined context I was hoping for. We do explore and discuss our fantasies though I would like to add some outside/fresh ideas to the mix.
Thanks.

 

[ender27]

*****

 

[Esem]

I totally get this one also. enders idea of sensory deprivation is definitely on the right track. You could also search predicament bondage ideas online as this might suit you as well. Simply leaving the room after he has been secured in a vulnerable position could also be a way to go.

You could link this to the likes by letting him kiss your feet whilst tied up and leaving him once he is excited to wait for more. You could also carefully secure a worn sock or shoe over his nose to wear and smell whilst he sits facing the corner with his hands tied behind his back.

I don't know if you would have experienced much around chastity devices if this is just a bedroom fantasy but the idea might also be worth a little research as this can be appropriate in some ways if it takes your fancy.

Just an FYI there is another thread on here I've seen in BDSM Talk called Physical/sexual punishment ideas that might be worth keeping an eye on.

I hope this is helpful.

 

[Saucyminx]

I think I know what you mean about not wanting to have suggestions about what to SAY and not really wanting to "perform". If I'm reading it right, play acting can feel silly or self-conscious.

Here's my suggestion given that... don't just tie him down... restrict all his senses. Tie him up so he can't move (the less movement the better); blindfold him (do it well so it can't slip off... maybe even eye patches); and ear plugs so you're not expected to act/speak, or ear buds with music. Maybe a gag to prevent him from speaking too.

Then... play with him at your own pace.

Losing sight and hearing might be a big turn-on for him, but it also frees you from having to "act" and you can just play, tease, torture, etc.

If you go this route, make sure he has some way to signal you if things go awry, since he can't get a safe word out if he's gagged, and you won't be able to gage from eye contact if he's also blindfolded. One of my favorites, is a set of keys in the hand the bottom can drop to get my attention, or if you want to go for the comedy factor, you could always give him an air horn.

I know you--as in the OP--said you are up on safety, but it never hurts repeating.

You can throw in some temperature play to mix things up. Ice can be nice. Feathers, tickling, all fun things you can add to the kink box, as long as you know if any of the things you are going to try, aren't a hard limit. If I was tied up and tickled I would be violent the second I was let loose--just sayin.

 

[B_Lloyd]

Thank you very much for the really helpful inspiration, ideas and advice so far. You have made starting this thread worth while. Please do continue to add any more ideas if you have any.

 

[Emerson40]

B_Lloyd,

You may want to explore the BDSM Forum for ideas, inspiration, and seek some answers there.

There are some great answers to be found here, in the HT, but you may find a broader, more experienced (with the topic you are asking about) pool of resources in that forum.

Have fun!


http://37.media.tumblr.com/b604bf14f85761e43b65d5dea0a253e4/tumblr_n68ywhQb9I1rxzouco1_500.jpg

 

[subwannabe]

I think you need to do something that will help him remember this day forever - until the day he is lying in his bed in the nursing home. Smell is one thing that comes to mind. Have something that gives off a smell that will trigger memories for a long time to come. Maybe a smell that is slightly out of the ordinary but not too unordinary. Oranges for example. Anytime he smells oranges or cleaning products with an orange smell he will remember this one day. It could be fragrant candles or something else with a fragrance.

Also, along the same theme - one day my wife had me buy a big hairbrush in the store which she was going to use the backside of it to spank me with. I knew this is what I was buying it for. That was several years ago and every time I'm in the bathroom and see that brush (which she now uses on her hair), it reminds me of that day.

I also like to be teased and tied up firmly, with no wriggle room. I suggest you tease him mercilessly in this position for a long period and at some point ask him to tell you some fantasies that he has never told you. Keep on teasing him until he tells you and then we he finally breaks, make him tell you some more. Another thing I like is when I am forced to beg her to not let me cum. You wouldn't believe the paradox going through your mind as you are hornier than hell and having to beg to not cum. Very exhilirating.

 

[B_Lloyd]

Thanks for those. I’ve checked out the BDMS forum as suggested and it is useful. I’m not sure about posting this one there though as I’m not sure how it would be received. I think others approach bdsm differently and some that take their bdsm relationship very seriously might not understand what/why I am asking.
I am really liking the ideas they are really helpful. Keep them coming.
Subwannabe/anybody how do you make a guy “beg not to cum” some ideas on this would be great? Thanks.

 

[subwannabe]

The best way really is to tie him up and tease him with a slow handjob. When he gets horny as hell he will be submissive enough to beg you for anything. Most submissive men want you to control their orgasms and have it on your terms. This is what they really want deep down inside so, in effect, you will be giving him exactly what he really wants. It is quite the paradox though to beg you to not let him cum that night when the urge to cum is so strong. Make him understand that when, where, and how he has an orgasm is now completely up to you and that he has no say in the matter. Let him know that if he follows your orders (like begging you to not let him cum) then he will be rewarded more frequently with orgasms and if he does not follow your orders then he won't. You can also turn this to your advantage by making him your slave - doing housework, doting on you, giving you massages, giving your orgasms with him getting nothing in return, all the time knowing that the better he follows orders the more orgasms he will have. As a personal note, I love to be rewarded by being forced to eat my own cum but that is an individual thing. Maybe you can "feel him out" on this, so to speak, during the time you have him horny as hell. To make the event even more exhilirating, you can record it for posterity or by letting him know that since you do have a recording of the scene that he will be expecting to follow your orders again and again. Some of these things he may not be thrilled about doing while not in the mood but will be very receptive to it while in the mood. Good luck. Hope you let us all know how it goes. My wife indulges me a little from time to time but I really wish she would go "all the way" and get into it like you are doing here.

 

[unregistered]