Idea for a VERY dark story

[BlackPlague88]

Hello! This is my first time posting and I’m looking for people who can help me out with an idea I have for a story, that hopefully someone will write for me. It is a VERY dark, perverse extreme gangbang/cuckold story that I have in mind. That goes like this:

A married 35 year old mother of 2, named Kelly, has an ongoing fantasy about being gangbanged, without her husband knowing. This fantasy has been in her mind for more than 10 years and now the urge is so big that she can’t resist it anymore, so she places an ad online. To witch a small club of 4 older men react. She talks with them and they seem very nice at first but they turn out to be a bunch of sadistic pigs that want to use and abuse her in the most extreme ways. She wants it rough, but she has no idea how brutal they are going to use her. They eventually video tape the gangbang for their own use but one of them ends up sending the tape to Kelly’s husband. The story is told through his point of view as he watches the tape and sees what depraved acts these 4 men made his beautiful wife do. And how much she secretly enjoyed it. Eventually the husband breaks down in horror and emotion as the tape and story ends.

Now, some of the acts that the 4 men make the wife Kelly do:



- lots of kissing and tongue sucking (to make it personal for her husband)

- A LOT of spitting in her mouth (the 4 men take turns spitting in her mouth through the entire story, many many times)

- Groping her and manhandling her breasts (pinching her nipples, slapping her breasts)

- Fingering both her holes and making her squirt
-
A LOT of name calling (cheap slut, married whore, cunt,dog… anything you can think of)

- Making fun of her husband, making fun of the fact that she’s a mother

- hard anal fucking and very dirty ass to mouth (lots of talking to her about the taste of their dicks after anal)

- Airtight double penetration, super fast and hard making her scream

- She has to give them all rim jobs (she complaints about the taste but is so horny that she doesn’t mind at this point)

- Slapping her face and chocking her during the dp

- Making her call her husbands name while they fuck her

- Anal creampies that she has to eat/drink

- After all this, the 4 men piss in her mouth.

She is on a leash/collar and is wearing a pink fishnet body suit. She’s got big natural breast and a busty body with a big butt. The location for the gangbang has to be, a cheap motel or a cabin they rented.

I’m aware that this is a very, very rough story idea but It would be so awesome if someone could please turn this into a 6,7 page long story with a short introduction and lots of extreme nasty action.

I’m willing to pay you for writing this story, I can pay through Paypal. Money is no problem, name your price. You can contact me via mail at: mark.reynaers@gmail.com Thanks in advance.

 

[AlinaX]

Fun, but better from her POV.

 

[Carnevil9]

Interesting scenario, and certainly hot. And you have provided a lot of the mechanics of the story. But, a story is not just a transcript of what happened, like a newspaper report. A story also has to convey emotions and a story arc. Questions that you need to consider:

• What is the wife's attitude at the beginning of the story?
  Does her attitude change?
  What is the husband's attitude at the beginning, and does it change?
  Does their relationship change? How?
  Are they better off or worse off by the end of the story?
  Are there any regrets?

It is fine to leave these questions unanswered, or ambiguous, but they should at least be raised so the reader has something to ponder, beyond the titillation of the story.

 

[BlackPlague88]

yeah I haven't thought it out this much, it was just an idea that I had for a very brutal story. If you want to help with idea's or write the story, please do. Thanks

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Sorry, I just don't understand the spiting in her mouth. What purpose does that serve except to degrader her, I would guess, but as for me, when someone spit in her mouth, I would get dressed and leave. I just don't get it.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

yeah I haven't thought it out this much, it was just an idea that I had for a very brutal story. If you want to help with idea's or write the story, please do. Thanks

Now the big question. Does she enjoy it? If she doesn't it won't fly here at Lit. She not only would have to enjoy it during but afterwards too.

 

[AlinaX]

Perhaps more interestingly is *why* she might enjoy being degraded & humiliated. Sadly, such speculation would probably transgress the rules of Lit...

 

[KindredFlame]

intresting idea

I like the basic premise of the idea. so the husband sees the recording and its his reaction to what he sees that is the story.

my problem is I am not good enough to write this.

Being a sub/slave myself I can see the interest in being degraded but if she didn't like the way they were going to do this why did she go for it

lastly who knows how a man reacts except another man maybe?
good luck KF

 

[AlinaX]

Dear George

I needed to get away - for a few days, maybe weeks. I have done something, something terrible that even I cannot yet fully justify to myself. You will think it an act of madness, no doubt. Self-destructive and immoral, and somehow worse still. Just, I beg you, do not think I do not still love you. What I have done is despite loving you, and its apparent cruelty to you is my greatest regret now. If you choose to never see me again, I will understand completely - though I am sure my heart would break.

This letter is my confession, and my attempt to explain - not justify, just explain - how I came to surrender not merely my body but every shred of dignity in a quest for what might be perceived as some perverse sexual degradation but what I saw as an almost spiritual journey to nirvana through self-extinction. Do not rush to think this was some idle whimsy or crass infidelity. Rather, this was a worm of dark obsession that has grown to maturity, a guilty secret nurtured for years until it threatened to burst from my chest like an acid-blooded alien.

No. This act was planned, prepared for, and finally executed. I am entirely to blame. I did what I had to do, though in consequence I no longer know who I am, but I am hopeful that in writing this confession to you I will come to a new understanding.

 

[BlackPlague88]

Damn, that's actually really good! Would be a great way to start.. Thanks! Feel free to contact me on writing the rest of the story?

 

[AlinaX]

Maybe. I'm really busy for the next couple of months, but I may play with this story a bit.

 

[BlackPlague88]

Of course, no problem. There is no hurry. If you want to write it, then take your time. Thanks!

 

[gunhilltrain]

This is a little confusing because you have the exact same thread in two different categories, The Author Hangout and Story Ideas. Thus you have a different set of people responding in each category. It's too late now, but it would have better I think to have picked only one category. The Author Hangout has a larger group of people involved with responding.

 

[AlinaX]

Oh, I don't know.
In Story Ideas, they tell you, "Hey, great idea, write it yourself!"
In Authors' Hangout they argue over which category to put it in.

OP: I have this great idea but it's really dark.
SI: Cool! Write it!
AH: Bah, been there, done it. Have you seeing Loving Wives lately?

 

[JaxRhapsody]

Perhaps more interestingly is *why* she might enjoy being degraded & humiliated. Sadly, such speculation would probably transgress the rules of Lit...

Maybe her family and husband always had her on a pedestal?

 

[Carnevil9]

Perhaps more interestingly is *why* she might enjoy being degraded & humiliated. Sadly, such speculation would probably transgress the rules of Lit...

Maybe I'm taking a narrow view of things, but it seems to me that almost all BDSM stories focus on the "why" of the situation. A few people might enjoy reading of someone being humiliated for the sake of the humiliation itself, but I think most readers would rather focus on the mystery of what brought the character to that place.

 

[AlinaX]

I rarely read BDSM, but that makes sense.

ETA: I'm wondering what exactly "Airtight double penetration" is.
ETA2: k. Guessing it's just an all-holes-filled thing.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Maybe I'm taking a narrow view of things, but it seems to me that almost all BDSM stories focus on the "why" of the situation. A few people might enjoy reading of someone being humiliated for the sake of the humiliation itself, but I think most readers would rather focus on the mystery of what brought the character to that place.

I've already suggested to him that he take it someplace else besides Lit. Anyway, you'd have to a psychologist to fully explain it, but there is a portion of the population (a small minority?) who enjoy being humiliated for its own sake.

Then there is the porn industry, which pays people to do these things. There is one guy, I forgot his name, who specializes in creating these videos. Some of his "victims" seem to like it being in his productions.

That could be her motivation for this story: she is doing it for the money she is being paid to be filmed during her ordeals.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

I rarely read BDSM, but that makes sense.

ETA: I'm wondering what exactly "Airtight double penetration" is.
ETA2: k. Guessing it's just an all-holes-filled thing.

Air tight mean all three holes are filled, mouth, vagina, and rectum.

 

[AlinaX]

Air tight mean all three holes are filled, mouth, vagina, and rectum.

k. Ta

 

[Carnevil9]

Air tight mean all three holes are filled, mouth, vagina, and rectum.

What about the nostrils? You aren't really airtight until they are plugged too.

 

[Hypoxia]

What about the nostrils? You aren't really airtight until they are plugged too.

And various abscesses etc. See Like A Hole In The Head for a few combinations. Damn, I should have included a tracheotomy there!

 

[gunhilltrain]

And various abscesses etc. See Like A Hole In The Head for a few combinations. Damn, I should have included a tracheotomy there!

How about a colostomy? This is beginning to sound like a David Cronenberg movie.

 

[BlackPlague88]

Thank you everyone for the comments, didn't think it would get any reaction. To make things clear, this is all just a fantasy I am in NO way into degrading or hurting women in real life, just a fantasy. That being said, i am into darker stuff (I write short horror stories for fun in the style of clive barker, but nowhere near as good..) and I have tried writing this story myself but for some reason it just didn't work. That's why i'm here looking for someone who can write it for me.

The darkness of the story lies with the husband who is unaware of his wife's ongoing secret fantasies. And also the wife herself, who is struggling with this lust and fantasy she cannot control any longer until she finally gives into it. It would be cool to see a long introduction as to where she struggles with the guild and then finally goes through with it and contacts the other men.

Anyway if anyone think they can work this out into a long story, feel free to DM me. Thanks again.
And sorry for my bad english, i'm from Belgium.

 

[gunhilltrain]

As the potential creator of this work, you are under no obligation to say that it's "just a fantasy" or that you don't approve of what's going on in it. Most of us already know that. And on the chance that you, somewhere within your soul, would like to do these acts - well, that's your business. I mean, you did think of all of it.

In another post, I suggested that you write it yourself. I know, that's very hard to do. As the author, you are responsible for everything: the plot, dialogue, characters, the setting. Somebody said, "A filmmaker needs an army, a writer just a pen." (Well, a word processor.) You can get editors here to help you, but they can't actually do it for you. But if you can write it and publish it, the sense of satisfaction will be intense.