I Need To Vent!!

[nikkijames]

As most of you are, I'm sure aware of the fact that I have not been around and I'm also pretty sure that nobody cares, so this thread may be hijacked at any point in time.

I just don't get it.. what the fuck have I done to the male human species to make them think that they can totally shit on me all the time?

For awhile I was thinking it was me and the way I was towards men, because yes, for a long time after my daughter's father left us I wanted nothing more then a fuck. Now I am looking for a more meaningful relationship and I have sat back and looked at the way I treat men, and I tend to think that I am a pretty decent woman. I work full time, support myself and daughter 100%, am very independant, don't do drugs and only drink socially. I am open and honest with them, telling them what I want and what I expect. I have learned and taken something from every relationship I have ever been in and have made myself into a better person. I have learned that communication and trust are the two most important things to have. I have learned the true meaning of respect and I have learned to like the person I have become. Isn't that the one thing that people always say.. you have to like yourself before anyone else can like you? So why is it that men have to be such assholes? Why do men think that a woman doesn't want them to just say.. 'hey I'm having second thoughts about this or that'... instead of just ignoring you and blowing you off? I know this all boils down to women vs men brains and that we women will never understand a man's way of thinking and vice versa.

Okay.. I think I am done for now.......

 

[ElizabethWest]

I luvs ya girl...

 

[LadyJeanne]

Hugs, sweets.



I think when men, and women, blow somebody off, they're the kind of people who prefer to avoid confrontation. It's easier to fade away than to face you and tell you things they think you won't want to hear. It doesn't make it right, and it's harder on you, but easier for them.

It's not a given that when you have your head on straight, you will only attract and be attracted to men who also have their act together. Some men will be attracted to you precisely because they don't have their their act together - they seek it in someone else because they don't have it. But, eventually, they will feel like they can't live up to who you are - their ego dives and they disappear.

We're all works in progress...some have more work to do than others.

Take care.

 

[hydrex]

As most of you are, I'm sure aware of the fact that I have not been around and I'm also pretty sure that nobody cares, so this thread may be hijacked at any point in time.

I just don't get it.. what the fuck have I done to the male human species to make them think that they can totally shit on me all the time?

For awhile I was thinking it was me and the way I was towards men, because yes, for a long time after my daughter's father left us I wanted nothing more then a fuck. Now I am looking for a more meaningful relationship and I have sat back and looked at the way I treat men, and I tend to think that I am a pretty decent woman. I work full time, support myself and daughter 100%, am very independant, don't do drugs and only drink socially. I am open and honest with them, telling them what I want and what I expect. I have learned and taken something from every relationship I have ever been in and have made myself into a better person. I have learned that communication and trust are the two most important things to have. I have learned the true meaning of respect and I have learned to like the person I have become. Isn't that the one thing that people always say.. you have to like yourself before anyone else can like you? So why is it that men have to be such assholes? Why do men think that a woman doesn't want them to just say.. 'hey I'm having second thoughts about this or that'... instead of just ignoring you and blowing you off? I know this all boils down to women vs men brains and that we women will never understand a man's way of thinking and vice versa.

Okay.. I think I am done for now.......

I don't even know you so I am positive I never shat on you. All men aren't assholes.

 

[Softouch911]

Why do men think that a woman doesn't want them to just say.. 'hey I'm having second thoughts about this or that'... instead of just ignoring you and blowing you off? I know this all boils down to women vs men brains and that we women will never understand a man's way of thinking and vice versa.

Okay.. I think I am done for now.......

As the token male for the moment, it sounds to me like you've got a gripe. That sort of rejection is bogus and selfish and plain cowardly.

I would love to meet the woman you describe. Why are you so ready to think it's you? Is there any chance you've been running into a stream of jerks?




Softouch

 

[nikkijames]

I don't even know you so I am positive I never shat on you. All men aren't assholes.

I'm sure you are right about not all men being assholes, however the ones in my life are and have been.

 

[hydrex]

I'm sure you are right about not all men being assholes, however the ones in my life are and have been.

Sorry to hear that. If it's any consolation a lot of women I meet are assholes too.

 

[nikkijames]

As the token male for the moment, it sounds to me like you've got a gripe. That sort of rejection is bogus and selfish and plain cowardly.

I would love to meet the woman you describe. Why are you so ready to think it's you? Is there any chance you've been running into a stream of jerks?




Softouch

Does a stream of jerks last for 4 years? I'm thinking maybe it's more like a river.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Does a stream of jerks last for 4 years? I'm thinking maybe it's more like a river.

All you need is just one who isn't. Maybe he's sitting on the beach.

 

[minsue]

Might look at who you're picking, sweetie, and why. There are plenty of assholes and cowards in this world, but certainly not the entirety of the male sex. I promise.

 

[Softouch911]

Does a stream of jerks last for 4 years? I'm thinking maybe it's more like a river.

Wish I could help. I sure don't understand --- though I know it was a long time in finding a woman who would be honest about how she felt.

I just did recently. Although she's upfront, unfortunately she doesn't like me.

Some poetic justice in that, I guess, and some humor.




softouch

 

[nikkijames]

Wish I could help. I sure don't understand --- though I know it was a long time in finding a woman who would be honest about how she felt.

I just did recently. Although she's upfront, unfortunately she doesn't like me.

Some poetic justice in that, I guess, and some humor.




softouch

Sorry to hear that. *hug*

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

You mentioned all the growing that you have done, but have said nothing about any changes in your environment.

Several friends would date guys that they met where we worked, but I never thought that was a good idea. If you try to have a relationship with someone you meet in a toilet, you shouldn’t be surprised when you find yourself involved with an asshole.

Have you considered trying a different sort of venue so you can meet a different sort of guy?

 

[elsol]

So why is it that men have to be such assholes?

Because women let men get away with it...

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[R. Richard]

Where are you meeting the guys you think are ass holes? Bars are full of ass holes. In the city in which I currently live and in several cities in the past there have been activity clubs. There were coed vollyball clubs, hiking clubs, etc. The people you meet in an activity club are quite a bit less likely to be ass holes.

While the rest of us guys were trying to pick up chicks in bars, dances, etc., one of the guys used to hang out at the library. Hell, he was scoring more pussy that the rest of us combined.

Just a thought.

 

[SeaCat]

My wife likes to jokingly say that not all men are assholes. The good ones are still married.

That being said I don't think it's you dear one. Unfortunately many men who are single just aren't ready for what they call a ready made family, but they aren't willing to say it because it decreases the chances of getting into your pants. I think these guys are lower than roadkill, and completely without honor, as I'm sure you would agree, but there are good ones out there. It just takes some effort to find them.

Cat

 

[hmmnmm]

The population of the world must consist of assholes - this would have to include men. If it was otherwise, the discovery of that one true gem would not mean near as much.

 

[Belegon]

It's not men or women, it is people. Ask the people on this board who are oriented towards their own sex...there are just as many hazards on both sides of the fence.

That said, and hopefully removing taint of defensiveness, there are just so many factors in this. It just can't be narrowed down quickly. But I don't feel that I am an asshole and I would like to think many here would agree...so there is hope. Of course I am still married, which disqualifies me per Seacat's wife....

One thing that was said that I totally agree with...try changing the avenue you meet through. It is no guarantee, but is worth a shot.

Of course, once you meet one you like and commit, you'll meet a dozen that are worthwhile. I suspect this is half the sense of humor of a higher power and half that you feel happy and confident, both things that most people are attracted to....

 

[cinnamonstick]

I'm sure you are right about not all men being assholes, however the ones in my life are and have been.

Sometimes I feel the same way. But there are still good ones out there. They are just harder to find.

 

[elsol]

I'm an asshole... because quite frankly, nice guys gets stepped on.

I know... I'm the one they cheat on those nice guys with.

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[nikkijames]

Once again to the men that have replied here, I never said that 'you' are an asshole. I only know one male from Lit and we'll not get into that here, but I can't really pick out anyone that sticks out in my head as an asshole.

As far as changing where I meet men.. have done that. Maybe it's just the area I live in... I should move.

 

[elsol]

I didn't think you'd call me an asshole... i was just taking the opportunity to post warning signs.

I'm sure eventually I'll do something thoroughly assholish and i would hate for someone to be surprised.

Sincerely,
ElSol