I hate my cat and I'm gonna kill him

[April]

Yep, simple as that. He has no redeeming qualities at all, so I'm gonna do the world a favor and take him out.

He's whiny as hell, vindictive, destructive, messy, a bully to the other cat, and really can't be left alone or he starts wailing to the ceiling about how abused and neglected he is. The little shit!

And now there are claw marks in the Egyptian papyrus art I had stupidly left lying on the window sill. Why did he do it? Hell if I know. Probably because I wasn't giving him my undivided attention.

He's fucking evil. Maybe I'll lock him in the basement. He sure deserves it.

 

[Pechorin]

And now there are claw marks in the Egyptian papyrus art I had stupidly left lying on the window sill. Why did he do it?

Maybe he prefers modern art?

 

[Ferun]

cut his balls off.... that should calm him down..... and you still get to inflict pain on him if you do it yourself.

 

[Natalie Nessus]

Be very careful with cats

We like them, they represent our other selves that we can not reveal to you

Do you not know this?

 

[Ferun]

and i love my little dumbass to pieces

 

[AusTess]

I'm not a cat person.

But strangely,my last 2 cats picked me.

And they are/were both very,very similar.

Now you've got me thinking,Nessus,as both cats are kinda nasty,bitchy and hissy when disturbed.*l*

 

[android1966]

My cat can be a right pain at times, it jumps on
my keyboard when i'm writing, when i'm having a
relaxing wank it stands on my chest and stares at me and it's learnt to use the door knocker so it's
forever demanding entrance to the house. It also
follows me down the road when i go out on foot.

 

[xx_La_Reina_xx]

hahahahaha....

*Laughing as I read this thread title*

Did Wise start this thread???


April...you are not alone in your feline woes....


*wink*Reina

 

[jass1960]

OMG

Oh my god!

What will Laurel say?

 

[Svedish_Chef]

I'm still waiting for Laurel to ban her...

Then I worked out that she hadn't banned Mensa and I so I thought it would be ok..

 

[Isabella Thorne]

My dear April -

Take it back ... take it back now ... please ... please ... please ... darling ...

i am certain you didn't mean it ... we all say things in anger from time to time ... i even say i'm gonna kill my b/f sometimes ... but i take it back when i calm down ...

i couldn't bear it if you didn't take it back ...
_____________________________
No heaven will heaven ever be
if my cats aren't there to welcome me.

~Cat Proverb~

 

[WhiteRose]

Be very careful with cats

We like them, they represent our other selves that we can not reveal to you

Do you not know this?

hehe I love my cat even though she's insane, attacks me for no reason while she's purring, yells at me, drives me up the wall and bites so hard she draws blood. (and even stuck her head down my shirt and bit my breast and drew blood yesterday for NO reason.)

When it's cold, she stretches out against my back under the covers and purrs, and when she wakes from a nap, the first thing she does is come running to find me for a snuggle. If I'm sad, she cuddles close and purrs and loves to hang over my left shoulder while I type...and flip her tail in my face.

She barks and quacks and bleats like a sheep, but she's my baby so I guess I'll keep her.

BTW Nessus, you always have the most beautiful avs

 

[Gingersnap]

Listen you guys every once and again you end up with an insane animal. I had one cat that embedded his fucking claws and hung on the screen window and my silk persian rug. I tried everything but ended up giving him to my vet who said he was just a product of bad breeding. It happens so back off of April. I love animals but sometimes like people they are destructive.

 

[Isabella Thorne]

Gingersnap ...

i would never mean any harm to my darling April ... and she knows that ...

and you can be assured, my dear, that i would never dream of backing off of her .....

 

[Caria Knight]

I can SOOOO sympithize

I have a wonderful cat. He claws up all the furniture, hangs from the screen on the door and all that crazy stuff but he's lovable and sweet as well. When my S/O moved in he brought his two cats (mother and son), then his old roommate moved in and brought his cat (the father of the little one). The father cat is nice, quiet and shy but the mother and son are nutsO. It got to the point where we have to keep ALL of the cats in the basement because of the jeolousness of the mother and son. I hate that we have to do it but MY son's health and wellbeing was in danger. I was never a big cat person until I got mine and unfortunitly, I'm not too keen on them anymore. Now I'm stuck trying to find homes for 4 cats so that they can get what they need from new owners. *sigh* It's sad but they have given me no choice, at least I've stopped the guys from just putting them out.

 

[April]

Well, he's still alive. Lucky for him. Alright, so he does have one redeeming quality. He likes my hair and nuzzles my head when I sit on the couch.
But he's an attention hound, and I can't stand that. He will do literally anything to get attention. Even if he stands a very good chance of being seriously hurt.
Oh well, fuck him. He's lucky I don't kick him out of the house. Oh, and he was neutered many years ago, so that's not the problem.

Nessus is right about cats, though. But not every cat is the inner self you hide away. Only some. Like the creature that is now draped across my lap, purring like crazy with satisfaction that she has my attention. LOL I didn't choose her, she chose me.

Isabella and Gingersnap, knock it off. Now kiss and make up. So I can watch.

 

[Mistress]

My cat is the Debil, I wuv her.
(Devil) (love)

 

[Mistress]

So gorgeous

 

[pipercatt]

All of my cats are co-dependent furr balls. They drive me nutz, but I love them still.

 

[Gingersnap]

April it was all very tongue in cheek to begin with Bella knows that and understands my sense of humor. BTW that cat ate her litter too (((shudders))) the vet really did think she had satan's DNA

 

[Isabella Thorne]

.... running into the thread quickly to give a great big hug to April and Ginger ....

.... and to drop off a big bag of pussy cat treats.

 

[Cibo]

The good thing about cats is almost no matter what you do to them, they will still love you. Sure they get into trouble, but sometime's its also your fault too. Just think of the all the good qualities and good times and that should calm you down. I have 2 psycho cats with me and they both want to sleep on my bed or under my covers with me at night. Too bad they aren't real life women.

 

[llee69]

Ahhh yes. Cats. Its a love hate thing I know...

I just love to hate em! My lil guy is spoiled rotten. Pins me down all the time. Makes me take naps with him for no reason. lays across my lap and just purrs his little head off. He is not the least bit afraid of dogs, just sits there clieaning himself (and sharpening his claws...) Sigh, Maybe I will keep him for 1 more night.

I do speak cat speak though. I know exactally what he says every time he meows.

He says "Me-now!"

As long as I respond right then and there all is fine...



ps, why dont I ever see those total typs before I post???

 

[fgarvb1]

The Worlds Best Tempered Cat.

Thats what we have MR. Man. oh, He can get annoying like when the microwave goes off he comes a running (he thinks thats were brisket comes from, ham also.) for his share of the loot.

He will be knocking at the door soon wanting in. The first thing he will do, Will be to eat a bite from his food dish. Then he will be patting my leg for permission to climb up in my lap to take a snooze.

After i get tired of setting still, I'll put him down. Then it's off to the bedroom for another snooze before going off tomcating around.

Mr. man dosn't bite or scratch anything, Doesn't make a mess. He just loves on us.

My wife bottle fed him when he was a newborn and he thinks she is his mother. They make a sweet picture layed up on the couch, Mr. Man's head and one paw resting on my wife's arm.

 

[April]

No worries Gingersnap and Isabella. But why can't there be kissing? Hmm?

I do love my cats, just don't like them all the time. They are both passed out on the couch now. But it won't be long before they're up here pestering me again. I think the napping is a bit tiring for them. Poor things are so tuckered out. LOL