Hey well some of you know that me and my girlfriend of a year and a half broke up. Well i dont understand what she is doing or think i mean. She calls me often and we talk. But the other night after i since her with her new b/f that i know. I felt like killing him but i held back and he is a little bitch and went to the bathroom so he wouldnt have to be around cause he knows he is going to get it. But when she was there my friends didnt really say anything to her and i talk to her for a couple of mins. Then that night on my drive home she called me and was like we got to talk so i said i would call her when i got home. So i did and she was like what the fuck is up with your friend actting like that and shit and i was what are the supposed to be like there my friends. Then she started crying say she doesnt know what she is doing and that she is thinking about me all the time and that she loves me and she really really miss me. She always say stuff like this. I was just being straight up with her say she most know what she is doing she is doing what her heart saying to do and then she said she didnt want to say things like that. She says this "guy" caught her off gaurd when he asked her out and she just said yes. Like i think i just want to forget about her but i cant cause she say he really loves me and stuff then like the next day shes just a bitch. I am so confused already that i want to break stuff. Why is she being so dumb like really? wtf is going on here ?
I dont understand
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Vixandra
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Sounds like she's playing with you SIC.
Personally- I'd kick her bitchy ass to the curb and be her occasionally talked to friend until she grows up some.
Yeah, she could still honest to Goddess be in love with you- but she obviously doesn't have the maturity or the decency to treat you like a human being so why should you take her back? It doesn't look like it would lead to anything more then you getting more of the same b/s.
I HATE females like that- gives the rest of us a bad name, you know?
Personally- I'd kick her bitchy ass to the curb and be her occasionally talked to friend until she grows up some.
Yeah, she could still honest to Goddess be in love with you- but she obviously doesn't have the maturity or the decency to treat you like a human being so why should you take her back? It doesn't look like it would lead to anything more then you getting more of the same b/s.
I HATE females like that- gives the rest of us a bad name, you know?
Bigg_Capone
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SIC...
Sounds like ya girl is keeping you around "just in case." I been there an' done that. Got the broken heart to prove it. Tell her that she needs to make up her mind, one way or another. Give her the ultimatum, 'cause if you don't this shit's gonna drag on and on and on and on until you're so fucked up in your head you don't know what's what.
Put it to her like this, "Look, we broke up. We're just friends and that's cool, but you can't keep calling me over every little thing that comes up and expect for me to be the one to jump in an' fix it. That's bullshit. It's too much on my plate. Why don't you call your "man" and have him deal with it. The way I see it, you're using me and it's not cool because one or both of us is gonna end up hurt in the end. I don't want that, I don't think you do either. You've got a boyfriend or whatever now, you should be talking to him about your issues. Not me. It hurts too much. We were together and now we're not, but we still see each other on a regular basis and talk to each other like nothing happened and we both know it did. I love you, but you need to figure out what the fuck you want. Oh, and if I see or hear about your new "man" giving you problems, don't hesitate to call me. I'd be more than happy to fuck him up. Other than that, you need to figure out what the fuck you want from me. You can't have it both ways. You can't be with him and me at the same damn time. It's not right. If you're gonna be with him, be with him. Don't call me over his petty little insecurities. I'll laugh at him. If you wanna be with me, be with me. Tell that motherfucker to bounce. I already told you I love you, now if you have anything in your heart for me, you'll think long and hard about just what it is you want. If you don't, well, then... I guess this is goodbye"
That should give her a mental jumpstart in the right direction, whatever that direction may be. Good luck.
Until this shit is all cleared up, don't let it eat away at you. You'll end up like me. You sooooooooo don't want that.
Sounds like ya girl is keeping you around "just in case." I been there an' done that. Got the broken heart to prove it. Tell her that she needs to make up her mind, one way or another. Give her the ultimatum, 'cause if you don't this shit's gonna drag on and on and on and on until you're so fucked up in your head you don't know what's what.
Put it to her like this, "Look, we broke up. We're just friends and that's cool, but you can't keep calling me over every little thing that comes up and expect for me to be the one to jump in an' fix it. That's bullshit. It's too much on my plate. Why don't you call your "man" and have him deal with it. The way I see it, you're using me and it's not cool because one or both of us is gonna end up hurt in the end. I don't want that, I don't think you do either. You've got a boyfriend or whatever now, you should be talking to him about your issues. Not me. It hurts too much. We were together and now we're not, but we still see each other on a regular basis and talk to each other like nothing happened and we both know it did. I love you, but you need to figure out what the fuck you want. Oh, and if I see or hear about your new "man" giving you problems, don't hesitate to call me. I'd be more than happy to fuck him up. Other than that, you need to figure out what the fuck you want from me. You can't have it both ways. You can't be with him and me at the same damn time. It's not right. If you're gonna be with him, be with him. Don't call me over his petty little insecurities. I'll laugh at him. If you wanna be with me, be with me. Tell that motherfucker to bounce. I already told you I love you, now if you have anything in your heart for me, you'll think long and hard about just what it is you want. If you don't, well, then... I guess this is goodbye"
That should give her a mental jumpstart in the right direction, whatever that direction may be. Good luck.
Until this shit is all cleared up, don't let it eat away at you. You'll end up like me. You sooooooooo don't want that.
I told her that i need to know if it was me or him but maybe next time i throw in alot more of the stuff you said and give it to her alittle harder. If he ever hurt her i wouldnt even think twice i mean me and her were friends for 8years already. And i took her away from her last b/f because he use to hit her and she didnt think she could just leave soi went to the little pricks house and took her away he sat there like a little bitch and then tryed to get some of his friends after me at school and shit but i had alot more ppl and nobody even fuckin tryed to mess with me at all. i am only 5'10 but my friends say i go crazy in fights lol. i dont notice lol my mom says its a bad thing but oh well.
SIC said:
You or him? Sounds to me like it's both. And maybe anybody else she thinks might sweep in like a knight on a white horse whenever she runs into a problem with one of her harem.
She is playing YOU. She is playing HIM. She needs to grow up. Any relationship the two of you have at this point is going to be half-assed, high school shit without a prayer.
My advice? Dump her cold. Tell her if she needs someone to run to, she can go to her new boyfriend. Then see how long it takes before HE is the one calling you and asking what the fuck he should do...because she's suddenly sending mixed signals and he saw her with this OTHER guy.
She's a player. Don't let her do that to you.
S.
Bigg_Capone
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sheath said:
Good call. Yeah. Let the dude know that you don't like him. Tell him that as soon you hear about him fucking up you're gonna be on him like second skin.
I've been the guy that's had to take my best female friend away from an abusive relationship, but sadly it didn't work because she thought that she wasn't good enough to not be abused. I went through that same scenario a few years back. Nothing good really came from it.
I loved her, she loved him. She and I would... ummm, well, I'm sure you know... but in the back of our minds there was something wrong. Good luck. Sounds like you're gonna need it.
Phoenix Stone
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No, man. Just Don't.
She may Not know what she's doing. She may Not be a player. She May even mean every word of it -- But It Doesn't Matter. Leave.
You don't want to get yourself in trouble around her or thru her or because of her. She's got something she's working out but You Could Get Hurt. Even if that means you ending up in trouble because of a fight on her behalf. Dont go there. Get her to a shrink. Seriously.
She needs help that you can't give her. she needs to find it from inside. If you're her friend, talk her into seeing a counselor for battered women at a shelter, or at school, or a clinic. She can get it for free. Seriously.
YOU don't want to end up in jail because She has a problem. YOu are Not her fixer. YOu have your own life. Take care of your family. And your job or school or whatever you're doing. It doesn't matter if she's confused. YOu can't unconfuse her.
Sometimes cutting someone off will snap someone out of it. Worked on me. But the woman has to be mature enough and strong enough that she won't pick whatever seems easiest. Or the most like something out of a Romance novel.
You don't want to be fighting over her with some guy. He's not the problem, either. He's just some guy. Same as you.
YOu have a lot of valor and protectiveness. Those are wonderful traits. But they're not what's needed here. You got to get some distance, be a little cold and practical about this. Think it out. What would you tell a friend in this situation? Someone you loved. Bet you'd tell that guy to get out. If you cared enough.
She may Not know what she's doing. She may Not be a player. She May even mean every word of it -- But It Doesn't Matter. Leave.
You don't want to get yourself in trouble around her or thru her or because of her. She's got something she's working out but You Could Get Hurt. Even if that means you ending up in trouble because of a fight on her behalf. Dont go there. Get her to a shrink. Seriously.
She needs help that you can't give her. she needs to find it from inside. If you're her friend, talk her into seeing a counselor for battered women at a shelter, or at school, or a clinic. She can get it for free. Seriously.
YOU don't want to end up in jail because She has a problem. YOu are Not her fixer. YOu have your own life. Take care of your family. And your job or school or whatever you're doing. It doesn't matter if she's confused. YOu can't unconfuse her.
Sometimes cutting someone off will snap someone out of it. Worked on me. But the woman has to be mature enough and strong enough that she won't pick whatever seems easiest. Or the most like something out of a Romance novel.
You don't want to be fighting over her with some guy. He's not the problem, either. He's just some guy. Same as you.
YOu have a lot of valor and protectiveness. Those are wonderful traits. But they're not what's needed here. You got to get some distance, be a little cold and practical about this. Think it out. What would you tell a friend in this situation? Someone you loved. Bet you'd tell that guy to get out. If you cared enough.
Definately "dump her cold" and stay frosty in all regards except maybe trying to get her into some counseling.
As others have said, she isn't worth going to jail over some stupid assault charge especially with the way shes acting. Sure doesn't sound like love to me.
As others have said, she isn't worth going to jail over some stupid assault charge especially with the way shes acting. Sure doesn't sound like love to me.
Yeah well i dont think i am going to beat this guy up even tho i know him. I am too old to fight over this kinda shit i told her that i still love her but she has to do what her heart is telling her to do. Now if its guy were to hurt her then i would be a different cases. I dont know what i want to do with her at all. I feel that she still loves me and i know i love her. But she is doing this shit. My mom told me that the grass aways looks greener on the other side till you get there. So maybe she doesnt know what she is doing. But if she were to want me back i dont know if it would be that easy now. I dont know what she is doing. I didnt even ever see this break up coming and then well pretty much both broke it off it didnt end in bad terms at all. She is just being so dumb and i just wish she could c it because there is a point where i wont even look back to her anymore and i got that date set in my head and it is coming up soon. But i told her i dont want her to be with me because other ppl want her to be with me and that i want to be with her. I told she has to want to be with me again!! Not everyone else. This is just fuckin confusing and i just dont know what the fuck is going on. yes i kinda feel like she is playing me but then sometime i dont think so. If anything i think she is really stringing the other guy around to she if she wants to be with me again.
Vixandra
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SIC said:
Tell her simply and plainly, "No I can't do this. I'm putting a stop to this now. I love you, never doubt that, but I will not be your toy. I will not be jerked around like this, abused and neglecited. I am an adult and adults don't do or take this kind of stuff (shit). Once you've grown up a bit, give me a call. I want to still be your friend but not like this. This isn't friendship- this is you using me. Good bye."
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