I don't lie or even bend the truth. I "shape the evidence."

[shereads]

Introducing "shaped evidence," the newest word-weasel from the people who brought you "faith-based" and "global climate shift."

"Shaped evidence" can be used alternately with "shaped information."

I hope to become the first private citizen to make use of this brilliant weasel. Any ideas? So far, the only idea I've come up with is the possibility of filing a multi-million-dollar false insurance claim, using shaped evidence to boost the value of the fence that fell down.

Maybe I could alter a Home Depot receipt from my neighbor's trash to prove that he bought yellow cake uranium instead of a wet vac. But that wouldn't really accomplish my objective, which is to find practical applications for shaped evidence in the private sector. Also, the fallen fence increases the risk that a war against my neighbor would spill over the border. The last thing I need during an extended power outage is insurgents firing shoulder-launched missiles from my deck.

Any other ideas?

 

[Honey123]

Introducing "shaped evidence," the newest word-weasel from the people who brought you "faith-based" and "global climate shift."

"Shaped evidence" can be used alternately with "shaped information."

I hope to become the first private citizen to make use of this brilliant weasel. Any ideas? So far, the only idea I've come up with is the possibility of filing a multi-million-dollar false insurance claim, using shaped evidence to boost the value of the fence that fell down.

Maybe I could alter a Home Depot receipt from my neighbor's trash to prove that he bought yellow cake uranium instead of a wet vac. But that wouldn't really accomplish my objective, which is to find practical applications for shaped evidence in the private sector. Also, the fallen fence increases the risk that a war against my neighbor would spill over the border. The last thing I need during an extended power outage is insurgents firing shoulder-launched missiles from my deck.

Any other ideas?

Driving with a cup of boiling hot McDonald's coffee in between your thighs and then suing McDonald's because their coffe was TOO hot...oh wait, that's been done before...

 

[sweetnpetite]

you could shape the evidence of an affair.

For example. There's a guy you really like but he's in a long term relationship and you just can't wait. You don't set the girl up or spread rumours about her sluttiness because that would be wrong. You just shape the evidence

And if you get caught in a wrong doing, you shape the evidence to show that everyone else is doing it too. If you can get them to doubt there own innocence, you are an expert evidence shaper Extra points if you can get them to doubt there own sanity.

 

[neonlyte]

Honestly - those striped pants make your bum look slimmer.

It's not fake tan - it's skin enhancement cream.

Silicon is a natural substance, that's why it's completely safe.

Trust me - it's not what you can do with it, it's how big that matters.

 

[Honey123]

you could shape the evidence of an affair.

For example. There's a guy you really like but he's in a long term relationship and you just can't wait. You don't set the girl up or spread rumours about her sluttiness because that would be wrong. You just shape the evidence

And if you get caught in a wrong doing, you shape the evidence to show that everyone else is doing it too. If you can get them to doubt there own innocence, you are an expert evidence shaper Extra points if you can get them to doubt there own sanity.

That's an episode of Desperate Housewives....

 

[rgraham666]

There's lots of evidence shapers in the private field.

Some are lawyers. (Sorry vamp)

And some are accountants. (Sorry Penelope)

The rest are in management and usually hold MBAs. (Apologies to any MBAs here)

 

[shereads]

There's lots of evidence shapers in the private field.

Some are lawyers. (Sorry vamp)

And some are accountants. (Sorry Penelope)

The rest are in management and usually hold MBAs. (Apologies to any MBAs here)

We do it in marketing, too. But we call it lying.

 

[Guest]

Was there a quote somewhere where someone actually used the phrase "shaping the evidence"?

Depending on the context, a prosecuter could see that as "evidence tampering", "obstruction of justice", "lying".

 

[Honey123]

Was there a quote somewhere where someone actually used the phrase "shaping the evidence"?

Depending on the context, a prosecuter could see that as "evidence tampering", "obstruction of justice", "lying".

unfortunately, there's tons of "shaping the evidence" in the courtoom.

 

[elsol]

Everybody 'shapes evidence'...

But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)
Saw me bangin' on the sofa (It wasn't me)
I even had her in the shower (It wasn't me)
She even caught me on camera (It wasn't me)

She saw the marks on my shoulder (It wasn't me)
Heard the words that I told her (It wasn't me)
Heard the scream get louder (It wasn't me)

--- I believe the prior term was 'Evidence Interpretation'

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[CharleyH]

Introducing "shaped evidence," the newest word-weasel from the people who brought you "faith-based" and "global climate shift."

"Shaped evidence" can be used alternately with "shaped information."

Any other ideas?

New phrases have happened for years in the guise of the Press Agent. You are just getting it? That's where all avant-garde pop culture phrases originate in the U.S., no?

 

[shereads]

Was there a quote somewhere where someone actually used the phrase "shaping the evidence"?

That's the phrase being used by political analysts to describe the deeper issue behind the Scooter Libby indictment and the long-postponed Senate investigation into the use of faulty WMD evidence to built support for the Iraq invasion. Worst-case scenario, which nobody in the mainstream media seems willing to address directly, is that the so-called Niger letter, a crudely faked document once used as "proof" that Saddam Hussein had revived his nuclear weapons program, wasn't faked by fairies or shoemakers elves, but by actual human beings. But why?

Hmm...Why would someone go to the trouble of creating fake evidence of a nuclear threat, and then planting the evidence at a crime scene in a foreign country friendly to the U.S., whose government would naturally feel a duty to pass the evidence along to U.S. intelligence?

Remember when GWB told us in his State of the Union address that Saddam Hussein could launch a nuclear missile within 45 minutes? Now that was scary, even to those of us who never believed that Iraq was connected with 9/11. That's the kind of threat that would qualify as a "real and present danger" to the security of the United States, by any definition. If ever there was a good reason to pre-emptively invade another country, that would be it. Cheney even used the term "mushroom cloud" a couple of times in interviews, just in case some of us didn't comprehend the danger of failing to invade.

Then Joseph Wilson told the NY Times that the evidence for nukes was fraudulent - and that the administration knew it was a fraud before the president delivered the State of the Union address.

You can't let people go around implying that the White House knowingly uses fake evidence to defraud Congress and the public into supporting a war. If you let Joseph Wilson get away with it, other people might come forward. Before long, the whole argument for war could fall apart, wasting many hours of careful planning, including the 30 seconds it took to jot down an exit strategy ("Exit strategy: TBD.")

You might be able to salvage your war by making an example of Wilson and his wife. If nothing else, you'd change the topic of the week from "fake evidence for war" to "CIA agent outed."

Oops. Did i say fake evidence? I meant to say shaped evidence. Fake evidence would mean someone committed treason, and caused the deaths of 2000 military personnel and an unknown number of Iraqi civilians, to promote an agenda they weren't willing to share with us.

Depending on the context, a prosecuter could see that as "evidence tampering", "obstruction of justice", "lying".

That's why Scooter will have to take the fall on this one. Good man, that Scooter.

 

[Edward Teach]

That's the phrase being used by political analysts to describe the deeper issue behind the Scooter Libby indictment and the long-postponed Senate investigation into the use of faulty WMD evidence to built support for the Iraq invasion. Worst-case scenario, which nobody in the mainstream media seems willing to address directly, is that the so-called Niger letter, a crudely faked document once used as "proof" that Saddam Hussein had revived his nuclear weapons program, wasn't faked by fairies or shoemakers elves, but by actual human beings. But why?

Hmm...Why would someone go to the trouble of creating fake evidence of a nuclear threat, and then planting the evidence at a crime scene in a foreign country friendly to the U.S., whose government would naturally feel a duty to pass the evidence along to U.S. intelligence?

Remember when GWB told us in his State of the Union address that Saddam Hussein could launch a nuclear missile within 45 minutes? Now that was scary, even to those of us who never believed that Iraq was connected with 9/11. That's the kind of threat that would qualify as a "real and present danger" to the security of the United States, by any definition. If ever there was a good reason to pre-emptively invade another country, that would be it. Cheney even used the term "mushroom cloud" a couple of times in interviews, just in case some of us didn't comprehend the danger of failing to invade.

Then Joseph Wilson told the NY Times that the evidence for nukes was fraudulent - and that the administration knew it was a fraud before the president delivered the State of the Union address.

You can't let people go around implying that the White House knowingly uses fake evidence to defraud Congress and the public into supporting a war. If you let Joseph Wilson get away with it, other people might come forward. Before long, the whole argument for war could fall apart, wasting many hours of careful planning, including the 30 seconds it took to jot down an exit strategy ("Exit strategy: TBD.")

You might be able to salvage your war by making an example of Wilson and his wife. If nothing else, you'd change the topic of the week from "fake evidence for war" to "CIA agent outed."

Oops. Did i say fake evidence? I meant to say shaped evidence. Fake evidence would mean someone committed treason, and caused the deaths of 2000 military personnel and an unknown number of Iraqi civilians, to promote an agenda they weren't willing to share with us.



That's why Scooter will have to take the fall on this one. Good man, that Scooter.

Well, Missy, you can worry about all that war stuff all you want but there hasn't been an Orange Alert in a long time so the war must be working. We're fighting them over there.

Me, I'm just glad that our president is on top of this Bird Flu thing.

And that Bird Flu stuff is really serious--FOX News said so. Britt Hume was talking about it the other day and showed a flight of Mallard ducks landing on a pond--it was scary as hell, I'm here to tell you.

But Britt made it clear that President Bush is all over this pandemic thing. I know I feel much better now.


Eddie The Relieved (pissed?)

 

[Huckleman2000]

That's the phrase being used by political analysts to describe the deeper issue behind the Scooter Libby indictment and the long-postponed Senate investigation into the use of faulty WMD evidence to built support for the Iraq invasion. Worst-case scenario, which nobody in the mainstream media seems willing to address directly, is that the so-called Niger letter, a crudely faked document once used as "proof" that Saddam Hussein had revived his nuclear weapons program, wasn't faked by fairies or shoemakers elves, but by actual human beings. But why?

Hmm...Why would someone go to the trouble of creating fake evidence of a nuclear threat, and then planting the evidence at a crime scene in a foreign country friendly to the U.S., whose government would naturally feel a duty to pass the evidence along to U.S. intelligence?

Remember when GWB told us in his State of the Union address that Saddam Hussein could launch a nuclear missile within 45 minutes? Now that was scary, even to those of us who never believed that Iraq was connected with 9/11. That's the kind of threat that would qualify as a "real and present danger" to the security of the United States, by any definition. If ever there was a good reason to pre-emptively invade another country, that would be it. Cheney even used the term "mushroom cloud" a couple of times in interviews, just in case some of us didn't comprehend the danger of failing to invade.

Then Joseph Wilson told the NY Times that the evidence for nukes was fraudulent - and that the administration knew it was a fraud before the president delivered the State of the Union address.

You can't let people go around implying that the White House knowingly uses fake evidence to defraud Congress and the public into supporting a war. If you let Joseph Wilson get away with it, other people might come forward. Before long, the whole argument for war could fall apart, wasting many hours of careful planning, including the 30 seconds it took to jot down an exit strategy ("Exit strategy: TBD.")

You might be able to salvage your war by making an example of Wilson and his wife. If nothing else, you'd change the topic of the week from "fake evidence for war" to "CIA agent outed."

Oops. Did i say fake evidence? I meant to say shaped evidence. Fake evidence would mean someone committed treason, and caused the deaths of 2000 military personnel and an unknown number of Iraqi civilians, to promote an agenda they weren't willing to share with us.

That's why Scooter will have to take the fall on this one. Good man, that Scooter.

Okay, this is sounding sort of bitter.
Not illogical or overstated, really, but it puckers the lips.
And, um, any lips that are puckered by this sort of thing are lips that I want to get my tongue into!
I can't help it! I think it's like, when you know the world is about to end, you have this incredible urge to procreate?

 

[rgraham666]

The world is not about to end.

The human species might be, but not the world.

 

[shereads]

Well, Missy, you can worry about all that war stuff all you want but there hasn't been an Orange Alert in a long time so the war must be working. We're fighting them over there.

Me, I'm just glad that our president is on top of this Bird Flu thing.

I like the War on Bird Flu. It's a nice change from the War on Terror and the War on Drugs. If it's even half as successful as either of those....WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!


Teach, where have you been? You didn't take that bus to Cuba, did you?

 

[~hellbaby~]

Introducing "shaped evidence," the newest word-weasel from the people who brought you "faith-based" and "global climate shift."

"Shaped evidence" can be used alternately with "shaped information."

So cheating is really just improvised winning then.