I-can-whoop-your-ass-itis.

[KillerMuffin]

I'ma kick yo' ass! From way over here behind my monitor!

A semi-prolific member of this board has recently had a little rant that I found, well, vastly amusing at the very least. He couldn't spell Fuckin. Anyway, he also claimed that he could kick shyguy's ass. How does he know? Has he met shyguy? Is he aware that shyguy holds the third highest rank in jeetkundo worldwide? Does he know that shyguy has gone up against a squad of force recon and backed them down?

How can you be sure that you can can whoop someone's ass unless you actually fight them? If, for so inexplicable reason, shyguy tracked this idiot down and discovered he was actually a 15 year old from Brighton Beach who barely weighed 92 pounds and laughed himself into a coma, does that really count as getting his ass whooped?

It's rather debilitatingly stupid to get online and threaten to whoop peoples' asses because you can't back that up. It's like hiding behind the bouncer and calling the other guy names. It shows cowardice. I believe that we can all be forgiven for questioning the color of the Internet I'ma whoop your assers spine.

It's all good to get online and imitate your favorite gangsta rapper, cause no one will ever know the truth. It's too bad as well, because no one will ever know the real person and what they really think, all they will know is that there is some pathetic posturing fool trying to pass himself as something he isn't. Whatever credibility someone may have had before so obviously pretending to be something they aren't has been shot to hell like a road sign on a county road in missouri.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

I agree KM. But.....

Talk about a rant............

Noboby knows squat here - not about each other - maybe a real name, maybe a pic - but all that could be bull too.

All we/I know about you is what you spew (same with me) and that you call yourself KM.

And nothing more.

Hey - you a midget?

 

[Shelby]

Come on, put up your dukes!!

Heck,

All along I had been thinking that I could probaby
whoop Shyguy with one arm tied behind my back & blindfolded.

Sorry KM, I couldn't resist.

We'll now go back to our regularily scheduled thread.

 

[Expertise]

Nail on the head KM

Very well said.

When some cum bubble starts spouting off with infantile and meaningless threats like that it causes me to assume several things.

1. That they are someone who was/is picked on (verbaly/physicaly) as a child/adolescent and their persona here can extract some measure of "revenge" from the safety of the "box".

2. They are a very immature individual

3. That in reality 90% of their peer group could knock the piss out of them.

I have SIGNIFICANT amounts of both formal and informal training in armed and un-armed combat and more than a little experience with both. Even with this, accompanied by the knowledge that I can best the vast majority of the population it would be ridiculous of me to make physical threats.

Could I kick your ass? Probably. Would I want to? Rarely (although a couple exceptions spring to mind).Would I ever get the opportunity? Unlikely.

Therefor lets all show a little restraint and duke it out verbaly.

I along with most here are far more impressed with a strong and agile mind as opposed to clumsy and idle threats of "ass whuppins"

 

[Juliangel]

Re: Nail on the head KM

Very well said.

Could I kick your ass? Probably. Would I want to? Rarely (although a couple exceptions spring to mind).Would I ever get the opportunity? Unlikely.

Therefor lets all show a little restraint and duke it out verbaly.

I along with most here are far more impressed with a strong and agile mind as opposed to clumsy and idle threats of "ass whuppins"

Jumping behind Expertise no matter what kind of fight, physical or verbal, I figure I will be safe there.

 

[Expertise]

Just don't fondle my buttocks.

If its my watch I have to concentrate.

 

[Guest]

(waves hand!) Me first! Me first!

 

[Samuari]

Hey Julia!

I'm gonna hide behind KM, 'cause I think she's meaner! I betcha she can lick Expertise, and make him like it!

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

About ass whiping......

I mean whipping!

Ya just never know..... never.

I witnessed a big, huge, notorious football player - waiting to be in a men's room line - pick up the rather slight, Hispanic dude who was peeing at the urinal in front of him - picked him up by the shoulders, feet off the ground, rotate and place him still peeing against the wall.

Well, that little Hispanic guy was pissed. As the big tough football player comensed to do his own business the little guy pulled a box cutter out of his pocket, said something to the big guy - big guy turns around and - SLICE! Right accross the cheek, about an 7 inch - teeny, weeny red line. The big buy was pissed and came after the little guy who ducked him a couple of times - the teeny, weeny red line - began to grow wider and wider until it was about a 1/2" wide gash and bleeding all over the place. The big guy looked in the mirror and was horrified - fight over. Little Mexican guy by a box cutter. Not a scratch on him. Big guy to the hospital with perminant life-long scar.

No rules street fighting - ya just never know. Best rule to have is to "not engage."

 

[Juliangel]

Just don't fondle my buttocks.

If its my watch I have to concentrate.

Ok I will just gaze with wonder as long as I get to fondle it later.

 

[Guest]

Re: Hey Julia!

 

[Purple Haze]

http://www.bla-bla.com/homes/doodie/pics/boxer.gif

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Well, back in Dubbaya-Dubbaya Two while taking out a Nazi machine gun nest with just my bare hands and a pine cone I felt pretty much like I could kick anyone's ass, and so I don't mind telling some four-eyed computer geek who giggles when he reads the titty stories that I can whoop his flacid ergonomic chair-shaped ass. So you just send Little Miss Shyguy my way, tell him to wear his panties, and I'll bitch slap him from here to New Delhi faster than you can say "Cyberpunk".

And doesn't "Fuckin" have a "g" at the end?

LOL

I can't tell you how many nutballs I ran into in the chat room who threatened to "kick my ass". The threat always seemed to lose testerone when they then had to ask "Where are you?". Like I'm gona' say, "Okay, you take the 405 North to Sunset, make a right off the ramp..."

And Shyguy? Last fight I was in was in first grade. And I lost. Please don't hurt me.

 

[Samuari]

Maybe ass kissing! Which ever, I still want ticket rights! Julia you and LL can fight over concessions...mmm that might worth a billing all by itself!

[Edited by Samuari on 11-20-2000 at 09:26 AM]

 

[Silverlily]

There is a saying I have found to be VERY true -

Those that can usually don't talk about it.


Why the hell would someone threaten ShyGuy of all people? That just blows my mind. Hopefully whoever did it got caught playing on the computer by his mommy and will be grounded for a week or so.

 

[Samuari]

Ahh, now what am I going to do with all these tickets?

 

[Expertise]

In response to Sparky, you really don't ever know.

My dad gave me some good advice on the subject.... Respect.

Show people RESPECT and you will avoid most confrontations. If a confrontation is unavoidable, show RESPECT for their ability and do not underestimate them.

As to your story Sparky I call people like you described Squirrels. I am far more wary of them than I am Mongo's (the football player). They tend to be more unpredictable and often times more dangerous since they percieve a greater threat in some one of my size and react in response to it.

 

[*Eve*]

I think I could probably take Sparky in an ass kicking contest. Come on Sparky!!!!

On the other hand KillerMuffin frightens me a little so I think I'd stay out of her way.

 

[Silverlily]

Whoohoo! Rumble on the Hill!

Eve v. Sparky

Ok folks, I got 5 to 2 odds in favor of Eve!

 

[Guest]

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Squirels huh?

That's as good as any descriptive - maybe psycho-squirrels for some.

There's something about some, not all, some - little guys - even if they aren't mean fighter types, or have some kind of chip, etc..

My best friend, Irish born, American raised, 5'5' with shoes on - he, from a very, very early age - demonstrated physical practices and abilities far beyond us normal schulbs. He could walk around the block, "on his hands." He rode a unicycle from like, 6 years old. He could walk up stairs with it - all sorts of cool tricks. He eventually, in HS, took state championship in the Pummel Horse and High Bar. He could hold an Iron Cross on the rings for near record length. He was one hell of a diver and surfer. We called him "Nimble Flick." He now is a Tar Heel couch for gymnastics, that's UNC.

Little guys - man - don't ever underestimate them - they can be really, really big in so many ways.

 

[ShyGuy68]

First of all, KM you sure gave me a good laugh with your post! You sure have a talent for writing!! lol

It might have been a bit of my own fault that he got mad at me, thinking about the way I wrote to him. But honestly the chance of him finding out where I live and all, are as small as the chance that a snowball will survive in hell for 5 minutes!! lol

I'm a very peaceful person myself, and have never ever in my life been in a fight. I just don't see any reason for it, and I also think that people that choose to fight, do so because they often don't have a way with words! lol

It's much better to make love than war, at least I think so! So feel free to give me some loving!! lol

 

[Silverlily]

Lol, ShyGuy, tell ya what, I've got your back as long as you cover my front.

 

[Wizard]

All I can say is in 33 years , growing up in the city at 5'4" 115 lbs on a good day (wet) ......I have learned how to fall down real well.......Hit your fist with my face just when you don't expect it..........Curl up on the floor like a baby...................

As I got older I learned to stay down on the floor and NOT get back up (only get hit again)...............

And now I have to say I just walk away .....***** is too short it just isn't worth it..........

They only ass I have kicked is my own.............

 

[Wizard]

Hey and a beer bottle works real well as an ice pack too....Just hold it on your broken open lip and drink another one...............