I am a petty bitch.

[Chicklet]

Argh. I'm sitting here, trying so hard not to write a nasty letter to my current roommate. I really, really want to, but it seems so petty.

When my last roommate moved to North Carolina, I chose to give a guy moving here from Texas a chance. To let him send me a check for rent to ensure him a room, and then when he got here help him out with rides and education on the area and hanging out with my friends, etc etc. He seemed cool enough.

It's been a few months, and on the one hand, I totally understand that he's homesick and misses his friends and his cat, and all the stuff that hasn't been shipped here yet. I understand that he's 25 and has never lived away from his family, and has just started working his first job, and minimum wage sucks and labor sucks and it's hard to get used to not having your own computer and your own tv and your own bed... I feel bad for him, I really do. But I also try to look after my own interests.

It's the first of the month, and I've already sent the rent-check in. Since his payday comes today, the day rent's DUE, I sent in the check early and take cash from him. But yesterday, last night around 11pm to be exact, he told me he's not going to pay rent. He's going to run back to Texas, instead.

No 30 day notice. No nothing. Just "Oh, I'm spending what would have been rent money on a plane ticket home. So long, and thanks for everything."

When I started talking to him when he was being considered for the position of my roommate, I told him I would be moving to Seattle in August. He said no problem, he'd stay with me until August, since I was already having a hard time finding someone to only commit to six months. Nobody likes to know there's a time-limit on their housing situation. But now it's going to be even more impossible for me to find someone. Just for three months? At my rent price? At my location? In the summer when EVERYONE is subletting? Good luck me. Another option becomes moving myself for the summer, subletting someone elses place. But I'm already planning to move everything I own in August, and I don't know if I can afford two moves in three months. Scratch that, I know I can't.

So I'm sitting here playing over a letter I want to write to him. A sort of "thanks for fucking me over" "don't use my computer since you've never helped with the cable bill" "stop borrowing my quarters for laundry since you've never replaced them" "stop using my dishes since you never washed them" "stop using my toilet since you've never scrubbed it" "fuck you and your mother for wasting my time and screwing my plans up." but I don't want to be petty. I want to be the bigger person, sit it out, deal with the situation rationally and let it smooth itself over.

But god, being petty is so appealing.

 

[jadefirefly]

Write the petty bitch letter. Write it as nastily, vindictively, and piss-ass-ily as you can make it.

Print it out, sign it, and put it somewhere safe.

THEN attempt to deal with it rationally. If that fails, well, you've got your petty letter handy. If it works out, at least you've gotten it out.

I am one of those people that, if something is bothering me, I absolutely cannot stand it until I write it all out.

 

[Shankara20]

Argh. I'm sitting here, trying so hard not to write a nasty letter to my current roommate. I really, really want to, but it seems so petty.


But god, being petty is so appealing.

well that sure sucks

and on top of all that poop he pulled you are dumping on yourself for being petty, if I may be so in your fact to say so. (hmmm I guess I did just say so - well I did work hard on learning to spell her name correctly after screwing it up all those months ago - well shit, now I dumping on myself)

anyway - so he is running home to mommy at 25 because the big bad world is hard. sob sob

Just as well he goes now before he can screw you out of more then one months rent.

What a jerk.

 

[Chicklet]

Write the petty bitch letter. Write it as nastily, vindictively, and piss-ass-ily as you can make it.

Print it out, sign it, and put it somewhere safe.

THEN attempt to deal with it rationally. If that fails, well, you've got your petty letter handy. If it works out, at least you've gotten it out.

such good advice. I think I'm going to do that.

Thank you, too, Shankara.

 

[fallenupright]

Did he sign any sort of contract? I made my subletter sign a sublease... so he was obligated to stay for at least the two months and give me 30 days notice if he wanted to leave...

If he didn't, you can hope he comes to his senses... if he did, remind him about his legal obligations to you...

In the future, I really suggest writing up a sublease or something whenever you have a roomie who isn't on the regular lease... and it should probably outline the rules of the house and all that stuff, too.

Sorry about your luck... roommates suck. That's why I ended back at home, my roomies screwed me over.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Deck him...then throw his crap in the street. *shrug*

 

[PredatorSmile]

Well, if you are truly a petty bitch, that's nothing to be proud of, no offense. I wouldn't call myself that, let alone broadcast it over the web.

 

[rosco rathbone]

He's fucking you over, plain and simple. DOn't write him a letter, call him out right to his face and shame the bastard into doing the right thing.

 

[Kajira Callista]

He's fucking you over, plain and simple. DOn't write him a letter, call him out right to his face and shame the bastard into doing the right thing.

I think we need ta go ova dere wit some a tha boys uncle rosco

 

[Netzach]

What rosco said. This isn't petty stupid stuff. This is beyond "nice" had you had him sign shit you might even be able to get him and mommy to have to pay you in court.

 

[rosco rathbone]

I think we need ta go ova dere wit some a tha boys uncle rosco

Oh, a righteously pissed off woman can dump a scathing bucket of scorn on the head of a young male that will make him rethink the folly of his ways.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Oh, a righteously pissed off woman can dump a scathing bucket of scorn on the head of a young male that will make him rethink the folly of his ways.

it would be more fun to watch him crap his pants though

 

[Shankara20]

Oh, a righteously pissed off woman can dump a scathing bucket of scorn on the head of a young male that will make him rethink the folly of his ways.

and take him at least a year to have his balls drop back into place....

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Totally concur with the last 8 posts......... minus post #7' no offence'

Sorry its all happened Chicklet and glad my being screwed over by 'roomies' days are long gone.

 

[Guest]

Argh. I'm sitting here, trying so hard not to write a nasty letter to my current roommate. I really, really want to, but it seems so petty.

When my last roommate moved to North Carolina, I chose to give a guy moving here from Texas a chance. To let him send me a check for rent to ensure him a room, and then when he got here help him out with rides and education on the area and hanging out with my friends, etc etc. He seemed cool enough.

It's been a few months, and on the one hand, I totally understand that he's homesick and misses his friends and his cat, and all the stuff that hasn't been shipped here yet. I understand that he's 25 and has never lived away from his family, and has just started working his first job, and minimum wage sucks and labor sucks and it's hard to get used to not having your own computer and your own tv and your own bed... I feel bad for him, I really do. But I also try to look after my own interests.

It's the first of the month, and I've already sent the rent-check in. Since his payday comes today, the day rent's DUE, I sent in the check early and take cash from him. But yesterday, last night around 11pm to be exact, he told me he's not going to pay rent. He's going to run back to Texas, instead.

No 30 day notice. No nothing. Just "Oh, I'm spending what would have been rent money on a plane ticket home. So long, and thanks for everything."

When I started talking to him when he was being considered for the position of my roommate, I told him I would be moving to Seattle in August. He said no problem, he'd stay with me until August, since I was already having a hard time finding someone to only commit to six months. Nobody likes to know there's a time-limit on their housing situation. But now it's going to be even more impossible for me to find someone. Just for three months? At my rent price? At my location? In the summer when EVERYONE is subletting? Good luck me. Another option becomes moving myself for the summer, subletting someone elses place. But I'm already planning to move everything I own in August, and I don't know if I can afford two moves in three months. Scratch that, I know I can't.

So I'm sitting here playing over a letter I want to write to him. A sort of "thanks for fucking me over" "don't use my computer since you've never helped with the cable bill" "stop borrowing my quarters for laundry since you've never replaced them" "stop using my dishes since you never washed them" "stop using my toilet since you've never scrubbed it" "fuck you and your mother for wasting my time and screwing my plans up." but I don't want to be petty. I want to be the bigger person, sit it out, deal with the situation rationally and let it smooth itself over.

But god, being petty is so appealing.

Petty my ass...this is MONEY...

At that exact point is when you look at him and say, "You have exactly 15 minutes to have yourself and every last bit of your shit out of my house...Or I will have the police here to help you".

ANd when he whines at you...some variation of "I can't do that" or "I don't have any place to go"... Tell him the truth... Tell him "That aint my problem, I aint your mommy, and you should have thought about that before you were such an asshole."

I know that sounds cruel... *grin* I can live with that..

I can live with it 'cause I've done the roomate thing... They have this tendancy to end up packing while you're at work..or school..or wherever.. And to "mistakenly" pack things that aren't theirs... Completely by accident of course..
And leaving you with etc etc etc... ANd a phone bill on top of that..

Nah..It's not petty to call some motherfucker at the game he is trying to run on you..
It may be a bit of revenge...But mainly ....It's self protection.

The last roomate cost me somewhat in excess of $750...Not counting the stuff he stole while packing his own...

Oh and that letter....Skip it...If you HAVE to go to court...Always a possibility...It will be a King Kong size albatross around your neck.

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Perhaps i misunderstood the following.

It's the first of the month, and I've already sent the rent-check in. Since his payday comes today, the day rent's DUE, I sent in the check early and take cash from him. But yesterday, last night around 11pm to be exact, he told me he's not going to pay rent.

If i'm not mistaken, his failure to pay rent removes his privilege to live there leaving you four options:

• Call the local law enforcement office to have him removed from the premises. He incurs sudden unexpected expenses that will return the screwing so to speak, everything's legal, and you get the last word.
• 10 minutes after he leaves for work, place his property outside the domicile, and have a locksmith there to change the locks. Risky in a few ways, requires physical labor on your part, and money to pay the locksmith.
• Threaten to do either of the above unless his share of the rent, cable, et al is in your hand by the end of the day.
• Endure, and hope nothing else disappears the day he does.

 

[jadefirefly]

I'd take AA's suggestions too.

 

[DVS]

Argh. I'm sitting here, trying so hard not to write a nasty letter to my current roommate. I really, really want to, but it seems so petty.

When my last roommate moved to North Carolina, I chose to give a guy moving here from Texas a chance. To let him send me a check for rent to ensure him a room, and then when he got here help him out with rides and education on the area and hanging out with my friends, etc etc. He seemed cool enough.

It's been a few months, and on the one hand, I totally understand that he's homesick and misses his friends and his cat, and all the stuff that hasn't been shipped here yet. I understand that he's 25 and has never lived away from his family, and has just started working his first job, and minimum wage sucks and labor sucks and it's hard to get used to not having your own computer and your own tv and your own bed... I feel bad for him, I really do. But I also try to look after my own interests.

It's the first of the month, and I've already sent the rent-check in. Since his payday comes today, the day rent's DUE, I sent in the check early and take cash from him. But yesterday, last night around 11pm to be exact, he told me he's not going to pay rent. He's going to run back to Texas, instead.

No 30 day notice. No nothing. Just "Oh, I'm spending what would have been rent money on a plane ticket home. So long, and thanks for everything."

When I started talking to him when he was being considered for the position of my roommate, I told him I would be moving to Seattle in August. He said no problem, he'd stay with me until August, since I was already having a hard time finding someone to only commit to six months. Nobody likes to know there's a time-limit on their housing situation. But now it's going to be even more impossible for me to find someone. Just for three months? At my rent price? At my location? In the summer when EVERYONE is subletting? Good luck me. Another option becomes moving myself for the summer, subletting someone elses place. But I'm already planning to move everything I own in August, and I don't know if I can afford two moves in three months. Scratch that, I know I can't.

So I'm sitting here playing over a letter I want to write to him. A sort of "thanks for fucking me over" "don't use my computer since you've never helped with the cable bill" "stop borrowing my quarters for laundry since you've never replaced them" "stop using my dishes since you never washed them" "stop using my toilet since you've never scrubbed it" "fuck you and your mother for wasting my time and screwing my plans up." but I don't want to be petty. I want to be the bigger person, sit it out, deal with the situation rationally and let it smooth itself over.

But god, being petty is so appealing.

Sorry, I misread the title. It hought it said pretty bitch. I was going to agree with you.

How do you keep getting yourself in to these situations? And, this isn't petty, this is your life he's messing with, and leaving you without proper notice is causing you an undue financial hardship. I'd call him on it, to his face. He sounds like a liddle wuss, anyway.

And, as for that letter? Why don't you write it to h is mommy...telling her how her liddle baby is coming back home to the womb. OK, maybe the womb statement is going too far, but after she gets over thinking you are just a disgurnttled and petty bitch, she might actually come to realize her son is not the shining example of maleness she would like for him to be.

Now, you are required to draw up a contract for the next person you allow to be your roommie. If you don't, I'm gonna...oh never mind. You'd just enjoy it way to much. I do hope you get this figured out. 25, huh? You'd think he would be more mature at that age. He's truely a mamma's boy.

 

[Shankara20]

Sorry, I misread the title. It hought it said pretty bitch. I was going to agree with you.

When I saw the thread I did the same thing thinking "I already know she is"....

If you have started thinking like me, DVS, you need to have your head examined.




.

 

[caela]

But god, being petty is so appealing.

Like everyone else said...You aren't being petty. This is an ADULT who knew the situation when he moved in and agreed to it. He agreed to stay until August when you moved out allowing you to make plans that he is now trying to fuck royally.

Since he is so freaking tied to mommy's petticoats (and how damned pathetic is that at 25???!!!) I'd call her too like DVS said and explain to her just what a jackass she raised though I might try and put it politely because if he's that tied to her she might be able to talk him into keeping his word and staying at least until August.

 

[graceanne]

I haven't read all the replies so I apologize if I'm repeating what other people have said.

But, what I'd do is write the letter than throw it away. Get out any name calling or other petty behavior. Then handle it face to face. Tell him how you feel, and what you feel he owes you. That way if he gets pissy you're the one being adult and mature and reasonable. Nothing pisses off an imature brat like having it shown to them how immature and bratty they are.

 

[leeroy jenkins]

When I saw the thread I did the same thing thinking "I already know she is"....

If you have started thinking like me, DVS, you need to have your head examined.




.

Shank your the cause of this hyjack, nice AV.

 

[Private_Label]

Most landlords would say, if the rent ain't paid on time you get en eviction notice. If he signed a subletters lease then he has whatever the lease says to collect his stuff and get the heck out of dodge (usually that is ~ three days). If there is no lease then you have the right as the name on the lease to kick the freeloader out.

Yeah, I did have to do that to a roommate one time, but like you, I don't have the cash to subsidize some deadbeat.

No one likes being the heavy, but this kid needs a lesson in life. He needs to leanr that if you break an agreement then you have to live with the consequences. Tell him he has 10 minutes, 12 hours or a day (however nice you want to be with him), and after that you will be putting his property at the curb for the trash.

I also suggest you get the locks changed as soon as possible for the same reasons mentioned before. Explain to your landlord why you need the locks changed. No telling what items of yours will go missing, or what damage he will do to the property in your absence. Sick I know, but better safe than finding all your stuff gone when you get home from work.

*edit*
I'd also check the phone records too before he leaves. No telling how much long distance or 900 number charges he has rung up.

 

[Chicklet]

I'd also check the phone records too before he leaves. No telling how much long distance or 900 number charges he has rung up.

luckily, after my first roommate and a phone disconnection nightmare when HE wouldn't pay bills/rent, I have a cellphone and won't have a house phone with anyone else. EVER.

How do you keep getting yourself in to these situations?

>< I know! 3 out of 3 in less than eleven months

Thanks everyone for your replies. I still don't know what I'm going to do. If anyone remembers reading about my similar situation last october, I found out the law always sides with the person not paying rent... no way can I just put his stuff outside.

I just wish I could have had the proper notice to get my shit together before being abandoned like this. Argh.

I wrote the letter and put it with my sex toys.

 

[chris9]

Ok, so I'm coming from a legal viewpoint, problem is, it's German law. I'm going to say it anyway, maybe one of the American law people around will drop in to say if it's like this or not in the US.

To me it sounds like you DO have a contract about him renting housing from you until August. I wouldn't say it not being written changes anything about it except how to prove it in court. That means if he leaves early, that's fine. But he has to fulfill his duty from the contract and pay rent until August. If he doesn't want to use the place he's rented, that's his problem. And as long as he doesn't have any major reasons for leaving (like his mom getting very sick and having to nurse her) he does not have the right to leave the contract before his time is up.
Throwing him out wouldn't work here either.


On a less legal note I agree with the plan to politely ring up his mom. Personally I'd try a 'devastated girl who doesn't know what to do, since she relied on mom's boy and he left and such' approach. It might get you at least this month's rent.