I’ve come to beg a brave writer for help

[Incompleteidea]

I feel a bit like a foolish girl crawling around in the dark. Please forgive me if I’m not posting in the right place as I’m still quite new here. I haven’t posted any writings here myself though I have enjoyed several of yours.

I’ve had a story in my head for a little less then a year. Not a story so much as characters and ideas I haven’t been able to progress past a certain point. At the moment all that’s on the page is an attraction of sorts, and the hint of a long past. This isn’t the first time this has happened to me, but it is the first time I’ve attempted to do something about the inevitable non-ending.

I tried finding a writing partner on CL, and though the story has changed a bit it hasn’t gone anywhere. Some editing has been done which it was in sore need of. However I think editing to much before the story is even half done –well- is a waste of time.

I’ve come to beg a brave writer for help. Please take my story and do what you will with it. Just take it past the front stairs. PM me and I’ll send it your way.

I would hope you don’t need to change the heroine as I am a bit attached. But everything else can be altered.

Please -I just want to see it take another step.

 

[cantdog]

Wow. Really deeply encoded, your post.

 

[matriarch]

I suggest you try the Literotica Volunteer Editors service.

Go to http://www.literotica.com/storyxs/voled_stor.shtml

This is where you should be able to find the help you need.

Good luck with the story.

Mat

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I don't know how many times I've said this, but Stories are the result of characters acting in an interesting way that creates a story. In other words, the character is made up first and it tells its own story. After you've been around here for a while you'll be a crazy as the rest of us with characters constantly running around in your head whispering, "Did you hear about...?"

It the character is interesting enough, it writes the story for you..

 

[Incompleteidea]

Jenny_Jackson- They're whispering about their past more than their future at the moment. I want to enclude the past but at the moment it still seems right only to elude to it... Does that make sence?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Jenny_Jackson- They're whispering about their past more than their future at the moment. I want to enclude the past but at the moment it still seems right only to elude to it... Does that make sence?

Can you write the story about their past? Maybe that's as far as you need to go-- what brought them to this point.

I recently had success when i was stuck, by brainstorming with someone. I told him what I had in the way of plot and characters, he gave me some suggestions that I could work from, and I've made some real progress at last.

Why don't you give us an idea of the genre-- and if someone here is in tune with horror story, or romance, or whatever, they could PM you for more details. to start from.

 

[3113]

Jenny has the right of it. If your characters aren't doing their job, one of three things is wrong:

1) You're telling the story from the wrong character's pov--or it's been right, but now you have to switch to another character. So Joe's done telling his side of the story, now it's time to give Jill her chance.

2) The setting is wrong--this goes back to what Stella said. Maybe the whole story is about what happened in the past, not the present. So it's time to surrender the whole idea of telling a story in the now--tell the story of "back when" instead. Or maybe you need to move the characters out of that apartment or city or town and to the desert or island or South of France where they first met.

3) You need something to motivate them again. Raymond Chandler used to say, when the action stops, bring in the guys with guns. And he has a point. So if you're characters about to meet up again and have sex...why not have one of them get a flat tire, cellphone goes dead...what are they going to do? If they're getting along fine, why not have an old boyfriend/girlfriend show up revealing nasty secrets? What are they going to do? Shake things up, and see what they do.

Usually one of these will unlock the door and you'll find that the rest of the story was just waiting for this (whatever this is) in order to be told.

 

[3113]

P.S. we can probably help you better if you give us an idea of what the story is about. Just a brief paragraph of what the story is that you were trying to tell, and where you're currently stuck.

 

[Incompleteidea]

For the moment the story could go towards romance or a nice D/s relationship or both. Its about a strong woman that has zero confidence when it comes to men (as so many woman are), a man that has never had to chase, and the two friends that set them up (while still having hang-ups of their own.) It’s about the simple things we do that catch the attention –and some times arousal- of others.

I think most of you are right in that I have to write about the past if it’s the only thing that’s coming to me.

3113-

You’re right as well.

Back to the drawing board for me.

Oh- an excerpt.
Warning if detail isn’t your thing this wont be either.

He watched as Al seemingly made love to her drink. She lightly slipped her tongue out of a half open mouth, through her pink lips and played with the small straw. toying with it, she flicked her tongue over the tip. Her lips slowly slid over the thin piece of plastic as her eyes closed. Sweet eye lids would flutter as she sipped and closed tighter as she drew at the liquid- as she drew at her Johnny. He wondered what her face would look like playing with his finger or drawing and sucking from his member. Would she still close her eyes? She moaned and sighed at the warmth her drink was soaking her in. An unconscious sound he doubted even she noticed. John strained to hear her over the loud bar. Small noises that excited him in a way he had never expected. The more her lips parted to take in the drink the more her harsh pink lipstick wore off. As the horrible color faded it was replaced with her natural beauty. Al’s lips were the lush pink- that of true arousal- the pink of perky nipples and swollen clits. It was a color he hardly could imagine being hidden behind gaudy lipstick. He leaned forward unconsciously moving to wipe away what remained of the stuff when Dan asked. “What about you John?”

John froze with his arm stretched out towards those lips that taunted him. Al’s eyes opened at the pause in the conversation as though woken from her ecstasy. The sight of his out stretched hand shook something deep inside her. She couldn’t help but stare at his reaching fingers. It had been a long time since a beautiful man had reached for her. She recoiled in surprise and doubt. But john now knew her eyes would be wide open if she ever tasted him.