How were you raised?

[Liana26]

I got a curious thought in my brain again, and I want to ask everyone, how were you raised and how do you think it contributed to who you are today as a Dom/me or sub?

 

[sigsauerprinces]

very interestingly

 

[Songcatcher]

very interestingly

Me too.

 

[LunarKitten]

I got a curious thought in my brain again, and I want to ask everyone, how were you raised and how do you think it contributed to who you are today as a Dom/me or sub?

Hmmm..I was raised by a southern baptist preacher of a step father

So, I guess you could blame it as a form of rebellion - but that's what I blame becoming a Pagan when I was 15 on lol

I can't look back and saying of my upbringing caused me to become what I am now. I can see signs of my service oriented ways - always wanting to take care of people and making sure they were pleased with what I did. But I think that's more psychology than physical environment.

 

[Netzach]

by wolves.

 

[graceanne]

I was raised by my mom, who was always very dominant, then went and married a man just like my mom. lol Don't know if that means anything, but I do know that I've always been very service oriented and easy to push around. Well, not easy, but easier than like my sister. I can get stubborn, and then I'm a mule, but usually I want people to be happy with me, so I don't. Are you looking for anything in specific here, Liana?

 

[Liana26]

Are you looking for anything in specific here, Liana?

Nope, not really anything specific. I was just curious to see if there was some kind of corollation between how you were raised and whether you became a dominant or submissive.

In my case, my parents never really disciplined me. They were good parents and all, but I was basically allowed to do pretty much whatever I wanted, as long as it wasn't along the lines of smoking crack in the living room, so I guess that's why I'm looking for discipline in adulthood. Never really got any from my childhood.

 

[silver_inari]

Re: Re: How were you raised?

Hmmm..I was raised by a southern baptist preacher of a step father

So, I guess you could blame it as a form of rebellion - but that's what I blame becoming a Pagan when I was 15 on lol

And this is why I keep telling a friend of mine that her son, who is being raised pagan and in a rather goth household, will have to become a young republican to rebell.

I can't look back and saying of my upbringing caused me to become what I am now. I can see signs of my service oriented ways - always wanting to take care of people and making sure they were pleased with what I did. But I think that's more psychology than physical environment.

This brings up the nature versusnurture argument, really. Are we submissive or dominant because of genetics, or how we were raised. Its really impossible to say since we can't isolate one from the other to see which variable has the effect.

 

[dragonlace]

I was raised by my mom, with a little help from my aunt and grandmother along the way. I was brought up with my family believing in me at whatever i wanted to do or be, they accepted my friends and who i chose to be around and never questioned me. They would bend over backwards to help me if i needed it. I was a good student and a good kid.

They were always there for me and continue to be now, a very loving close knit family.

 

[LunarKitten]

Re: Re: Re: How were you raised?

And this is why I keep telling a friend of mine that her son, who is being raised pagan and in a rather goth household, will have to become a young republican to rebell.

*shudders* Oh, say it ain't so!!!

*ducks all the rocks being thrown*

This brings up the nature versusnurture argument, really. Are we submissive or dominant because of genetics, or how we were raised. Its really impossible to say since we can't isolate one from the other to see which variable has the effect.

Nope, we'd have to have two people raised in similar fashions who turned out completely differently. Hmmm...well, guess that would be me and one of my younger sisters lol She's so vanilla, she doesn't even take a cherry on top

 

[Justina123]

I don't think anything in my childhood had anything to do with my being a submissive.

Upper middle class family, stay at home Mom, two kids, two cars, one dog, annual vacations, one of the top students in high school, etc. I don't see any correlation.

justina

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Smartass

by wolves.

See SAA ... you're channeling again QBofU.

 

[Netzach]

*chuckle* Awwwooooooo.

In my family , there is no such thing as a conversation in the normal sense. There is no point where anyone, other than me, because I learned this in school....will just sit and listen and say "yeah, I don't agree, but I see how you can see it that way." There are only raw nerves yelling over each other. To be noticed or heard, you must yell and fight. To survive, I had to learn to read between the lines, become a student of the most widly dysfunctional of human signals, and figure out the signal to noise.

I don't think my upbringing made me a Domme. I think it made me a fucking excellent Domme.

 

[Xelebes]

by wolves.

How often do you have family reunions and by perchance, do you dance with them come the reunions?

 

[Xelebes]

Re: Re: Re: How were you raised?

This brings up the nature versusnurture argument, really. Are we submissive or dominant because of genetics, or how we were raised. Its really impossible to say since we can't isolate one from the other to see which variable has the effect.

The nature is fostered by those who nurture us.

 

[Hajar]

hmm I was raised in a house of really dominant women to be a dominant woman
and now I am primarily a submissive with a mean sado/dominant streak.
I don't think that's what mummy expected.

 

[sunfox]

Mine is a bit like justina's... upper middle class family, small town, two cars, big house, one sibling, close-knit family, annual vacations, good student in school, et. al.

My mother is the more dominant of my parents, though both are very independent and alpha in personality. I mirror the alpha personality in general and am very independent and self-sufficient, but am also submissive. I don't really feel that much about my upbringing influenced that... it's just a part of me.

 

[princess4u]

i was raised in a two-parent home with six siblings - i'm the middle child -
my mother was always dominant in the home -
not only to my father but also to all her children -
some "baggage" i carried into adulthood was the need to please her -
and everytime i made a decision, i wondered how she would feel about it -
thank god i have pretty much overcome that

i am definitely a submissive - i often wonder if the
"need to please" that was instilled in me as a child
has anything to do with wanting to please my dom

another thought is that perhaps since my father was far from dominant
perhaps that is why it is something i seek....

 

[MoonduskSub]

I'm a switch (if that is what you want to call it), and I can not pin point anything in my past which would have lead me to being one way or another....As a blanket statement I notice some submissives tend to have a dark sexual past with criminal undertones....that is the only SLIGHT correlation I have ever really seen...just my thoughts
Lish

 

[skyan777]

Private school, for the first 9 years of my school life, if i had the audacity to have said the word "suck", or voice my opinions (i mean this quite literally) i would get in trouble, they had us walk in straight lines from class to class, and there were around 45 people in my eigth grade graduating class. (this may not sound like much, but i'm a young'en) anywho, i imagine that i just got used to all the order and being told what to do and stuff that when i "got out" i seeked for it again and found BDSM (does it work like that or no?) the only thing i don't get, is how my subconscience or whatever connected being forced to go to church every monday and study the Bible every day with being collared and whipped for arousal, possible rebellion thing? (i hated that school with a vengance)

 

[DianneD]

I was raised in a moderate household. Not too strict and not too permissive. I raised my children and the same way. Not sure where the BDSM interest came from.

 

[AnonymousSlave]

Maybe, it has nothing to do with 'how you were raised'
maybe it's more about birth order and the environment

just a thought

 

[LunarKitten]

Maybe, it has nothing to do with 'how you were raised'
maybe it's more about birth order and the environment

just a thought

Nah, I was first born, which means I was responsible for the others born aft...hey, wait a minute

 

[Silverlily]

Nah, I was first born, which means I was responsible for the others born aft...hey, wait a minute

Also first born, responsible for making sure everyone did as they were told.

 

[Etoile]

Only child here.