How to step away from the computer?

[AlotLikePsyche]

How to... step away from the computer?

So, I got on here Friday night and (stupidly) searched for a guy I (don't really) know and I found a million billion posts from him I'd never seen before. And now I can't stop reading like every post he's ever made even the ones he made like 6 years ago. I had checked once before and there were none. Now there are many. They appeared from nowhere. I don't understand. I'm out of control. I've lost all touch with reality. I'm jealous. (It's maybe important to mention I never even met this man in real life. We just wrote rather lengthy and personal emails for quite some time that meant something more to me than they meant to him.) And anyway, now I can't sleep. Can't stop reading. I'm exhausted. He's made hundreds of posts. I never left the computer today because I just wonder what else he has to say. He's made it clear he has nothing to say TO ME. At some point today, I just realized - Oh My Holy Hell. I'm a complete nut job. An internet stalker almost. He doesn't want to talk to me, so I just read everything he ever had to say to everyone else? Why am I doing this? This is NOT normal. I must be diagnosable. Is desperate a diagnosis? It really should be... What I need to know is this - How to step away from the computer? How to move on, let go, whatever.

 

[Cathleen]

It sure sounds like you don't want to let go of the idea of having him in your life. Sometimes the post history can be good and other times it can be dangerous.

As much as your head understands he doesn't want to talk with you, your mind, your heart hasn't let that idea in. I know it can be difficult. Perhaps if you join in some other threads here, some of the word games on the Playground and the discussion threads on the General Board can help be a distraction for you. Even if that is still on the computer (and Lit for that matter), it might help take that edge off a bit. Then tomorrow make a promise to yourself you will go out for a few hours - take a drive, see a movie, go for a walk - anything to get away from the computer. Read a book, write a letter - take those few hours and release yourself from the obsession of looking at his posts.

Knowing you're having a problem is the first step... you have tools at your disposal to change your behavior.

 

[Ravin the Poet]

Put him on ignore so you can't see what he writes or simply get off lit.

You don't have many options left. If your this obsessed with a guy you have never met, you need to get out more and find some friends. This may ne harsh, but seriously, getting caught up so much it controls your life is sad. You didn't say why you looked at all his posts. You hoping he says your name or something. To me this sounds like the nerdy girl getting all excited because the football captain said her name or even knew it.

Just try and grasp reality a little more, and know this is a different reality then in real life. Once that has happened, you shouldn't have a problem. But I think you should see help, because god knows what will happen if you meet someone in real life and this happens. You will drive them away.

Ravin

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

Sounds like you got hooked on the whole cyber thing. Yes, you will hear occasional tales of online romances morphing into reality, but that is very very rare. Your email relationship ran its course and is now over. If it helps you to get over it, bear in mind that everything he told you may have been a lie. Hell, maybe he is felonious whackadoo under house arrest. Put him on ignore as suggested, and move on.