How to make him cum less quickly?

[pisces_girl]

This has happened a few times while with a guy- while on top I get into a rhythm of rocking back and forth or grinding into him really hard and a little fast. And it feels good in all the right spots to the point that I clench the shit out of him to feel all the ridges and hardness of his dick, but he cums way too quickly. I don't know if it's a premature ejaculation problem... I'm pretty sure it's not. But I really enjoy being on top and fucking that way. I'm wondering, if I slowed down or got off of him mid-fuck would that delay his ejaculation? Or what would happen? Is the best solution to try a different position or change what I'm doing? The goal is to prolong the sex so that I can cum.

 

[Christopher2012]

This has happened a few times while with a guy- while on top I get into a rhythm of rocking back and forth or grinding into him really hard and a little fast. And it feels good in all the right spots to the point that I clench the shit out of him to feel all the ridges and hardness of his dick, but he cums way too quickly. I don't know if it's a premature ejaculation problem... I'm pretty sure it's not. But I really enjoy being on top and fucking that way. I'm wondering, if I slowed down or got off of him mid-fuck would that delay his ejaculation? Or what would happen? Is the best solution to try a different position or change what I'm doing? The goal is to prolong the sex so that I can cum.

He's probably cumming so fast from seeing your response. Obviously, if you're going harder and clinching out of pure and *real* enjoyment, then it'll in turn make him cum faster.

But he could always masturbate an hour prior to intercourse to delay ejaculation.

 

[emap]

Riding on top is lots of fun but it is also really good for him because he can watch your whole body enjoying his cock. Guys are visual so if he can watch all of you getting off on his cock and feel it he's going to blow his load.

Doing another position is a good idea, or slower. Honestly you don't want to go fast until what you want is his orgasm, as in you are getting sore and just want it over with. Porn is so not sex, but it does point to changing positions being good for his longevity.

I mean think about it, most scenes are 20-30 minutes long and it's all sex, well all porn but it's supposed to be sex. What I am saying is, for a guy stopping the sex to change positions means he cools off and can last longer.

So can't believe I'm going to say this, but take a cue from porn, start off in a position he likes, move to a different position then another, when you are happy with the orgasms you have or just want it over, get on top and ride him hard.

 

[nfrrdscnnr1]

maybe

Try gauging his nearness to ejaculation either by watching or having him let you know that he needs to you to slow or stop for a bit. God willing and the creeks don't rise, it should allow you to build or "edge" as some call it, do the same for him and make the finale spectacular. It has worked for me (not all the time, unfortunately).

 

[LettersFromTatyana]

This has happened a few times while with a guy- while on top I get into a rhythm of rocking back and forth or grinding into him really hard and a little fast. And it feels good in all the right spots to the point that I clench the shit out of him to feel all the ridges and hardness of his dick, but he cums way too quickly. I don't know if it's a premature ejaculation problem... I'm pretty sure it's not. But I really enjoy being on top and fucking that way. I'm wondering, if I slowed down or got off of him mid-fuck would that delay his ejaculation? Or what would happen? Is the best solution to try a different position or change what I'm doing? The goal is to prolong the sex so that I can cum.

Talk to him about it? Have you come right out and said, "sex with you is awesome, and I love being on top, but I'm having trouble getting off when we do it that way?"

There are all sorts of solutions, from him telling you when he's getting close so you can slow down, to either one of you playing with your clit/nipples/whatever else gets you off, to whatever else either of you can think of.

In some ways, this is a really great opportunity for you both to communicate and have a lot of fun experimenting.

 

[lovecraft68]

Riding on top is lots of fun but it is also really good for him because he can watch your whole body enjoying his cock. Guys are visual so if he can watch all of you getting off on his cock and feel it he's going to blow his load.

Doing another position is a good idea, or slower. Honestly you don't want to go fast until what you want is his orgasm, as in you are getting sore and just want it over with. Porn is so not sex, but it does point to changing positions being good for his longevity.

I mean think about it, most scenes are 20-30 minutes long and it's all sex, well all porn but it's supposed to be sex. What I am saying is, for a guy stopping the sex to change positions means he cools off and can last longer.

So can't believe I'm going to say this, but take a cue from porn, start off in a position he likes, move to a different position then another, when you are happy with the orgasms you have or just want it over, get on top and ride him hard.

You're right about the visual part. I normally have no problem holding off in the "normal" woman on top, but switch to reverse cowboy?

Watching her ass work me like that drives me nuts and I usually will get off quicker.

Position changes definitely slow things up. Also try some foreplay during. I'll stop in the middle of sex and say a quick "hello" between her legs, before getting back into the action so to speak.

Also to point out the 30 minute porn scenes, that's 3 hours of filming with who knows how many stops and starts in between.

Back to the visuals though, when I feel I'm getting close I'll actually try focusing on a non sexual spot, like if its doggy I'll stare at the middle of her back, if I look down and start watching myself entering her, then its off to the races.

Course, you can always rest and go again, "second rounds" should last a lot longer

 

[amofiga]

Pices girl

I always found that the changing positions thing helped me to delay cumming. I think the key was not letting yourself get too lost mentally in the fucking. Raw passion and horniness leads to premature ejaculation. Having to plan and orchestrate occupies the mind with other things. However, I don't know how that would help you as a woman since stopping and starting could break your mood as well......unless of course he does other things while taking his break like fingering you or eating you. I always liked (at least on occassions where the woman was agreeable to it) to give a woman at least one oral orgasm before doing any fucking. Get her off, let her work on me with her mouth a little while she re-groups, and then get into the fucking later. If she's had an orgasm or two then she didn't care when or where I came. Hot flailling around sex looks good in the movies, but it's not good for keeping things under control.

I also found that the longer I could hold off, the longer I could continue to hold off. I think my nerve endings got a little numb or something. My initial tendancy was to cum in a couple of minutes if I started right in with a steady fast pace of thrusting. If we prolonged the foreplay, swapped oral, did some 69, took more time, my heart rate would slow down or something and then I was good for a long fuck session and could control when I came till after she came. If she still didn't cum before me, well, then that's what they make tongues for. Try actually extending your foreplay time and maybe it could help improve the progress to the finish line. It's like running a marathon. If you bust out too fast, you get spent and drop out after 5 miles. You as the woman can go all out but he has to pace himeself.

 

[pleases32]

Unfortunately, we men are not programmed to last very long. When we get to that point, it is really hard for us not to cum. Not really something we can control. That ol' wives tale about thinking of baseball really does not work in practice. I used to cum right away too. But I wanted to also make it just as fun for my partner. So I started to study and practice the art of edging. This tries to gradually get you to extend your own arousal while focusing on the pleasure of your partner first. Just takes an awful lot of willpower! But it does tend to make it better for both in the end.

 

[Maxell46]

The grinding against a mans erection when the woman is on top I would venture to guess makes most of us come quicker .
The angle and the penetration as a lover rocks and grinds away is just damn sexy!!!!
I love when a woman mounts me and uses my cock for her enjoyment.


It does it for me
and I have a hard time holding back especialy if she knows how to use her hips and fuck.
Watching a womans body...watching her enjoy herself is a big turn on.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9hmluYjmd1rdr63ko1_400.gif

 

[mike2010fc]

.....

 

[rosco rathbone]

"Premature ejaculation" is a technical medical term which refers to ejaculation taking place before or very shortly after entry...usually within 5 or ten pumps.

What you're referring to is "ejaculation which takes place sooner than I'd like". Between the search for female orgasm and the cultural imprinting of porns, the goalposts for acceptable male performance keep getting moved back.

The average time to ejaculation is something like two minutes. We evolved to sow seeds and get out before something snuck up on us, not slog away all day.

 

[BiTodd]

edving, edging and more edging.
I believe you should suggest it to him. It is incredible! I can get really close and.feel sooo good, and then back off. and then get there again, feeling so good like before but even better with more climactic need. and over and over.
It definitely takes practice. but you will both be rewarded greatly. Enjoy the journey.

 

[Carnevil9]

Blow him first. Then cuddle for a bit so he can recuperate, and then roll him on his back and saddle up. He'll last a lot longer.

 

[soflabbwlvr]

If you aren't already doing so, put a rubber on his dick. That always slows me way the hell down. If you are, then I don't know what to tell you.

Stop being so damn good.

 

[Blue_Duck]

I experience the same problem when my wife rides me....essentially she controls the rhythm when in top, which is great and erotic.....and makes me cum quickly. What we do is incorporate dildo play into our foreplay. She chums in the shower once and at least one more time (all using a toy/dildo if some sort) before I enter her. This way, we both get off and I get to mentally fulfill my fantasy of fucking her after she has already fucked another man. This technique works pretty well for us at the moment. And if we wait long enough after I cum the first time, she gets a second free penis ride once the equipment has recovered. Fun times!

 

[culloden]

If you're close when he cums, don't stop moving. He'll stay hard for a time. Younger guys might not even soften much.

 

[Quantified]

To echo what others have said, any of the cowboy positions provide visuals that are going to coax that load more quickly. You may have to use that one only for closing ceremonies.

 

[subwannabe]

Try having him masturbate more or help him masturbate, doing this at other times when you are not on top. This will make it a little bit harder to cum as quickly when you do ride him. Don't overdo it though or he won't be able to cum at all unless it is by a hand.

 

[pisces_girl]

such great tips the most evident solutions seem to be changing positions, going down on him, and edging... i'll have to try a few things a report back. keep em coming!

 

[Lord Pmann]

More masturbation. That's pretty much my solution for any problem, but it actually works here.

Others mentioned it earlier. But if you know that you're going for a romp, have him masturbate several hours before. But as sub mentioned, don't get him addicted to it because then it may be TOO hard to cum.

 

[culloden]

Even better than masturbation prior to a romp is a blow job. I'm just sayin'...

 

[ky_fella_57]

I agree with most of the other men that replied that if it has been a while since he has had an orgasm, the fun think to do is to bring him to an orgasm during 4play (he will like that). Give him an opportunity to recoup, then you will be surprised how much longer he can last. Give it a try and report back Darlin.

 

[chellbarr]

I've heard that pressing on the perineum stops an ejaculation, but I have no first-hand evidence.

 

[amofiga]

In reading some of the other replies, I'm much in agreement that if you let the woman take control, you'll cum too quickly. She's likely to go all out and you'll reach a point of no return. It takes practice and control and unfortunately, that sort of stop/start edging and such is not condusive to the woman orgasiming. I don't understand why it's so hard not to just eat her or use a dildo/vibrator on her to get her to cum first and then fuck. That way, some of the "crazy passion" is over with and you can both take your time and maybe then she has time to cum again. It's worked for me. Also, using a vibrator on her clit (or letting her use it) while you fuck helps too. I've never understood men who won't let their lady use a vibe either solo or while fucking. My wife sometimes just like to use a vibe on herself while she blows me, then I take my turn to reciprocate. Think outside the standard mode of sticking it in and thrusting. That's ok if all you want to do is deposit sperm for reproduction, but fun sex requires a more creative way of going at it.

 

[minn]

Age difference!

When I was young I had a girlfriend who worked in a hospital at night. I would visit her frequently during the daytime at her home (She wad divorced with kids in school). She was insatiable. Before I left work I would masturbate to insure I would not cum too soon. I love oral sex so I would pleasure her with that while she had a couple orgasms. When we finally had intercourse it would be take me awhile before I came. I have to say ladies, I am always thinking about my partner first!

Now that I am older I can bring my lady to at least 2 orgasms before I have an orgasm. Life is good!