How to "deflower" myself

[maggieann]

I have a rather unique problem and I hope someone can help.
At 38, I'm probably the world's oldest virgin. I met someone very special and I don't want him to know how inexperienced I am. I'm pretty certain my hymen is still intact, when I masturbate I rub my clitors. When I have tried inserting something in my vagina, it hurts and I don't get very far. He's away visting his family for two weeks and I would like to take care of little matter now so that we can just have sex and I won't have to go into "the why's" of it all. Thanks/

 

[Big Willie]

hey Maggieann,
First of all let me cangratulate you on this. i am truly impressed respect your decision. second of all wait till he's back. personally i think you should do it with him. you've lasted 38 years with your virginity which i admire, but if you want to give it to this guy, let him at least help, you taking it yourself just loses everything you gained by keeping it for as long as you have. If i was your guy i would see it as a show of love that you have kept your virginity this long and you want to give it to me , my god you really love me that much.
Thats just my view if it doesn't make sense its because its 4am here.
have a good one
Peace
Big Will

 

[Cheyenne]

Okay, men. You can go read another thread for just a bit.
No volunteering to help her.
.
.
.
Have you been to the GYNO for pelvic exams before? If not, now would be a good time to start. And discuss birth control while you are there, too. If you're comfortable with your Doc, it wouldn't hurt to ask about the hymen, either. He or she can tell you if you are one of the rare women who need medical help breaking it.

In the meantime, what are the "somethings" you've been trying to insert? Tampons (in which case there may be a problem)? Dildo? Vibrator? Carrot? Cuccumber? What? The trick would be to start small and move to progressively larger items as they fit. Don't ask me how I know, I just do.

Next question: are you just trying to insert these "somethings" or are you getting yourself worked up first? You can't just lay down and insert a dildo, you need to be aroused first the same as if you were with a man. Are you lubricating with anything? Dildos, vibrators, all of them need lubrication to be comfortably inserted (unless you are really really excited and very wet, but even then it is still a good idea).

Another suggestion- think of what you are doing with your body as being FUN, not as having to deflower yourself. It should feel good, VERY good. If you're doing it right, it won't hurt.

Good luck! I'm betting there will be a few more suggestions for you.

 

[MADDOG]

Why break it? How special would it be if he knew that you waited for him?! Your sexual experience is bound to come up sooner or later. Then you'll either have to tell him you were a virgin until him, or lie and tell him you've had more. Which would you prefer?

If I were the guy, I'd feel rather special knowing that I was the first guy you were willing to be with.

I say let it be. Give him the HONOUR of breaking it.

MADDOG

 

[Cheyenne]

Different definition?

??? I can relate to the question that was asked, and if I'm correct, she is trying to be more comfortable and less embarassed her first time sleeping with this guy. Trust me, being a virgin past the age when people expect you NOT to be is no fun. Been there, done that.

Now, even if the hymen is broken or stretched by some other means besides a penis- she is still a virgin until she actually has intercourse with a man for the first time. At least in my book she is. That means she can do what she wants to do to be comfortable AND still tell this guy (if she wants to) that he is being given her virginity. Many women no longer have an intact hymen by the time they first have intercourse. It doesn't mean they aren't still a virgin though.

 

[Budokan]

This thread was started on 7-29. So we're all wondering, has she popped her cherry yet? --The world wonders.

 

[Cheyenne]

I'm kind of curious myself- which advice did you take? Break your own or wait for him to do it? How did it go? Details, we want details!

 

[Naked Hunny]

I have this feeling she just wanted to know what we thought about the situation and will never be back!!!

 

[Skibum]

Maggieann, have you thought about going to your gynecologist for help? I have heard that a simple proceedure in the doctor's office can take care of that pesky hymen with little discomfort.

 

[Bonnie Wee Lassie]

I really hope she waited and let him do it. I agree with everyone on that she should let him share that special moment with her.

Bonnie