How They Blow Us Off (no, not sexually)

[sfldaddy]

I've found it irritating that so many of today's "more-liberated" women still don't have the guts to tell a guy they're not interested - regardless of the online service. I'd like to know some of the excuses you've been given. Here are some of my frustrations: (perhaps some women can say the same about men here)

1. They don't have the decency of at least a quick note to say "Thanks but not interested."
2. They tell you they're "very busy and will get back to you later." Defined: "Drop dead. I'll never contact you again."
3. They say, "You're too good for me."
4. They'll lie and say they already have someone in their lives - even thoughtheir profile doesn't specify that.
5. WORST: They'll send you an "I'm interested" e-mail, so you respond. But you never hear from them again.

What have you guys (or girls) been receiving - or not been receiving? Your response may make me feel better so I'll know I'm not alone.

 

[INeedLove]

Girls get blown off too! Sad thing is...talking doesn't always have to lead to a romantic relationship or phone sex or cyber. Sometimes it feels good to just chat and to make friends. Recently a newpaper printed an article that Americans are more isolated and lonely than several decades ago. Folks are hiding behind a computer and not meeting real people, neighbors, etc.

The blow off I hate is the non-existent one where you never hear from them again. I too would prefer to hear "not interested" or "I have too much going on" instead of silence. Either way it still hurts a bit but at least you know.

 

[Enji]

I've found it irritating that so many of today's "more-liberated" women still don't have the guts to tell a guy they're not interested - regardless of the online service. I'd like to know some of the excuses you've been given. Here are some of my frustrations: (perhaps some women can say the same about men here)

1. They don't have the decency of at least a quick note to say "Thanks but not interested."
2. They tell you they're "very busy and will get back to you later." Defined: "Drop dead. I'll never contact you again."
3. They say, "You're too good for me."
4. They'll lie and say they already have someone in their lives - even thoughtheir profile doesn't specify that.
5. WORST: They'll send you an "I'm interested" e-mail, so you respond. But you never hear from them again.

What have you guys (or girls) been receiving - or not been receiving? Your response may make me feel better so I'll know I'm not alone.

lol..i've gotten them all before. Others include getting to known each other for a while..then dissapear trick . Or the "I don't know you well" excuse, not really my fault because they never ask you anything and only answer in a yes or no fashion. It's happend and always will, i find that the internet is a mean place, much easier to be inpolite to someone, who has no idea who you are, will never see again, and can get away with being rude to. But still don't give up! keep looking

 

[fetishboy4fun]

The worst one I've gotten is from people on yahoo or msn buddy lists,
they log on, and I have only said hi to them, not even getting into inplying anything sexuall, or anything really. and they just log out.

Two seconds of "take me off your list" would be fine. And honestly i have such a long list I woudln't mind cleaning it up, but to just duck out, into invisible mode most likely. is very rude

 

[FinnMacCool]

How about ,you set up a date,then they EMAIL,instead of phone,saying work popped up(understandable),and then never write or call after

 

[Eilan]

I've found it irritating that so many of today's "more-liberated" women still don't have the guts to tell a guy they're not interested - regardless of the online service.

My husband and I have a currently inactive AdultFriendFinder profile. I think that the dynamics of the Lit Personals Board are pretty similar to the dynamics of AFF--basically a shitload of horny men pursuing a handful of women (minus the fakes, bots, and spammers).

I've talked to women on AFF who get upwards of 100 messages a day--and I know there are women at Lit who do as well, particularly those who have pic threads. Who has time to sort through all that? Sure, the "U r hawt lets fuck" messages are easy to weed out, but it's still a time-consuming process.

When my husband and I were looking for someone for a MFM, we often encountered guys who contacted us without reading our profile. If they'd read the profile, they'd have realized that they didn't meet our criteria. Did we owe people like that a response? We didn't think so. Their inability to read wasn't our problem. Fortunately, a lot of personals sites have filters that keep messages like that from ever reaching their targets' inboxes.

While I agree that "thanks but no thanks" is the polite way to go about doing things, I can also understand why some women (can't speak for the men, obviously) don't do this. There are women out there who try to be polite about rejecting others only to receive a message saying, "Fuck you. You're an ugly whore, anyway" or some other message indicating that the person being rejected doesn't handle rejection well. Even the nicest ladies can get gun-shy about responding to their mail if they've been cursed at, threatened, or stalked by a rejected online suitor. And how are we supposed to know that you aren't going to act like an ass when we politely decline your advances?

Just some input from someone on the other side who's been there and done that.

 

[A Kilted Rogue]

For a lot of the reasons listed above, I don't compete for a woman's attention. I try my very hardest to be complimentary, as I'm a part of the last generation that truly knows what chivalry is (renaissance faires, anyone?). If a woman is interested, I figure she'll give me the time of day.

I refuse to be a 'bad boy'. I just don't have it in me. It appears that many of the women here that aren't already married are looking for that type. If they are not married or are in an unhappy relationship, a bad boy seems to let them fulfill a fantasy. Then when they realize how uncaring a bad boy is, they try and move on, but it's too late.

I figure that there is someone out there who is interested in the pleasure I have to offer on a long-term basis. I know of possibly one, but with the distance between us and the inability of either of us to relocate at the moment, it's a wonderful pipe dream.

We'll see what the future holds. I just know I'm not interested in leaving this world feeling alone.

Hopefully this isn't perceived as a rant. I still have a lot of love and pleasure to give to the one who wants it.

KR

 

[supahstoopid]

Maybe they just want a quick fling of it? I don't mind some naughty pm's back and forth with a guy until I get off, be it 10 mins or 2 hours...I know he's doing his thing, so he can't complain, so he shouldn't expect a date afterwards either (yes, many want to 'meet')...especially when I'm up front about my being married...

 

[DirtyKitten]

I find it irritating when someone starts thread after thread about why girls won't give a detailed explanation as to why they've stopped communicating with him.



But thats just me.

 

[ken0000001]

Not you

I find it irritating when someone starts thread after thread about why girls won't give a detailed explanation as to why they've stopped communicating with him.


But thats just me.

Although clearly men (and men imitating women) are the majority here, the lack of civility in some quarters (not all by any means) is just a reflection of our society as a whole. We are not civil people, cut people off, ask questions and don't listen to answers, don't respond, are late, etc. Whether man or woman, we should communicate respectfully and with sensitivity, but I know many who say "fuck you" to that whole notion of just being decent to another. It's not here, it's just about everywhere.

By the way, this is just me, but if that is your derriere on your AV, congrats and if not, well, is it just a tease, then? Is that all there is? On the other hand, I love being teased, but only in person.

 

[DirtyKitten]

You're serious right??

 

[ken0000001]

You're serious right??

Some parts yes, some parts no.

 

[DirtyKitten]

Although clearly men (and men imitating women) are the majority here, the lack of civility in some quarters (not all by any means) is just a reflection of our society as a whole. We are not civil people, cut people off, ask questions and don't listen to answers, don't respond, are late, etc. Whether man or woman, we should communicate respectfully and with sensitivity, but I know many who say "fuck you" to that whole notion of just being decent to another. It's not here, it's just about everywhere.

Granted, we have a lack of manners and social skills in our society. But hoping that you can change that on an internet message board, where anonymity is the reason most people are here, is highly unlikely and just kind of makes you look whiney. I don't feel its necessary to get into why every girl doesn't answer every PM that she receives, but I'm sure we all have our reasons and as hard as it is for some people to swallow this, we don't owe strangers on the internet any explanations no matter what anyone thinks. If you send a random PM (no matter how well it was written or what topic it was on) and you don't get a response, your disappointment is your own fault. You may have thought that particular girl was just what you were looking for, mabye she thought different. The best thing to do is to move on.

Now as far as men posing as women, I really can't comment on that, because I'm really a girl.

By the way, this is just me, but if that is your derriere on your AV, congrats and if not, well, is it just a tease, then? Is that all there is?

Nope, its not me, just a pic I think reflects my personality. Although I have used my own pic on occasion. Is that all their is?? Not even sure what you meant by that question, but I'd have to say No, if there wasn't more I would just be a disembodied head.

On the other hand, I love being teased, but only in person.

So you're here being teased "not in real life" for what reason??

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

Ok, Kitten, Love... Jenny, the dildo pack'n Dyke Bitch, is here. What's up with these limp dicks??

 

[DirtyKitten]

*waves*

Hey Jen.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

What the hell is a snarfdaddy anyway... Or did I get the name wrong?

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

*waves*

Hey Jen.

Hiya Love

** Pulling down Kittens panties for a good morning kiss **

 

[DirtyKitten]

Hiya Love

** Pulling down Kittens panties for a good morning kiss **

Love ya baby.

*tweaks Jen's nipples*

 

[ken0000001]

sometimes as cigar is just a cigar. Don't read too much into it, Kitten. Yes, I am being teased in real life and in cyber life. All I meant by my meanderings is that being nice does not mean you have a limp dick, as the "fuck you" girl suggests. I agree with you wholeheartedly that no one should expect (or be disappointed) by what happens on a message board. The disappointment comes in real life, we don't need to add more to our lives by being disillusioned here, of all places, where reality and fantasy are easily confused.

 

[DirtyKitten]

sometimes as cigar is just a cigar. Don't read too much into it, Kitten. Yes, I am being teased in real life and in cyber life. All I meant by my meanderings is that being nice does not mean you have a limp dick, as the "fuck you" girl suggests. I agree with you wholeheartedly that no one should expect (or be disappointed) by what happens on a message board. The disappointment comes in real life, we don't need to add more to our lives by being disillusioned here, of all places, where reality and fantasy are easily confused.

Can I get an AMEN from the congregation??

Thank you Ken.

Thats the only point I'm trying to make.

If you run around pissing and moaning because you don't get a response to every PM you send, you only lessen your chances of getting them because you make your self look like a whiny, douche bag.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I've found it irritating that so many of today's "more-liberated" women still don't have the guts to tell a guy they're not interested - regardless of the online service. I'd like to know some of the excuses you've been given. Here are some of my frustrations: (perhaps some women can say the same about men here)

1. They don't have the decency of at least a quick note to say "Thanks but not interested."
2. They tell you they're "very busy and will get back to you later." Defined: "Drop dead. I'll never contact you again."
3. They say, "You're too good for me."
4. They'll lie and say they already have someone in their lives - even thoughtheir profile doesn't specify that.
5. WORST: They'll send you an "I'm interested" e-mail, so you respond. But you never hear from them again.

What have you guys (or girls) been receiving - or not been receiving? Your response may make me feel better so I'll know I'm not alone.

Hmmm... this is a strange one.

Thanks not interested... yeah... Use that one about 100 times every day

Very busy... Yeah... Like last night when I was hounded by some asshole while I was trying to write. Fucker insisted I talk to him. BLOCKED

You're too good for me? Are you fucking DREAMING?

I do already have someone... and I certainly don't want this bozo

Never respond... Yeah... when I get a.. DROP YOUR PANTS.. BIG DADDY'S COMING HOME PM... that does not rate wasting my time with a response.

Who the hell is this clown?

 

[DirtyKitten]

But Jen, don't you know...


His PM's are always so well written and are always on some topic that the girl has just posted about, so therefore he ranks a response to every PM he sends.


I'd actually like the girls who've quit PMing him to PM me. These are some chica's I'd LOVE to talk to.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

But Jen, don't you know...


His PM's are always so well written and are always on some topic that the girl has just posted about, so therefore he ranks a response to every PM he sends.


I'd actually like the girls who've quit PMing him to PM me. These are some chica's I'd LOVE to talk to.

He sent me one a couple days ago... A definate #5 on his list. Like that rates an answering PM.

You know the type... "Hey baby saw ur pic. i'm stroking my cock so pm me back"... Say what the fuck?? Oh ya.. I'm going to pm an ass hole like that?

 

[DirtyKitten]

ROFLMFAO!!!!

Girl, tell me your serious!!!!!

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

ROFLMFAO!!!!

Girl, tell me your serious!!!!!

Oh yeah... I get them all the time... and from this LimpDaddy too... sheesh!!