How is this possible? Emotional Attachment From ...

[seaturtle50]

Greets,

Although I have been an avid reader on Lit for years - I only recently began to check out the chat.

 

[Guest]

Greets,

Although I have been an avid reader on Lit for years - I only recently began to check out the chat.

I have found that I have already developed an emotional attachment to a person that i have not EVER met. lol (This happend within a day - I would say nearly immediate)

I am in a strange place (just recently going through an amicable ending to 9 year relationship) and I am addicted to "Passion" - or am I just a "Sick Freak"???

It seems as though the anonymity of chat, cyber, phone, allows me to skip the normal first two months of getting to know someone, and jump immediately to "that connection" where I live to live.

What do you think? Am I the only one? Care to comment and hopefully share a similar experience (or else I will finally know for sure I am ALONE )

You are FAR from being alone Seaturtle. I am very attached to someone on here that i have known for about 3 weeks now. It happens, Mainly because that person is giving you what you emotionally need. At least, thats in my case. They fill a hunger in you that noone else can. It's an adreneline rush so to speak. What normally takes mnths to acheive is given to you right from the start. I like to call it, My Wolf hunger. :ROSE:

 

[MrMikelobe1952]

On line emotional attachment

This is an interesting issue. First, though, let me join the She-wolf in saying that you are not alone.

On the other hand, I think caution is in order in investing too much emotion to a relationship based solely on words and on-line exchanges. I believe that, in most if not all such instances, our reactions to others whom we meet are heavily influenced by our fantasies - by what we want to find. Certainly, I do not mean to suggest that our judgments of people we meet in "real life" are not also colored by our fantasies. Nevertheless, I think it is much easier to be deceived by our own fantasies in our on-line relationships. Meeting someone in person provides at least something of a reality test. Even then, it is best to go slowly and see things about hte person that they might not show in early acquaintances.


I'm just suggesting to take it slowly and be careful. You may not be meeting the person you think. On the other hand, there can be an openness and honesty in on-line communications that we do not get in early acquaintances in real life. But not necessarily.

Hope this makes sense.

 

[seaturtle50]

Thanks for the insite

What if its only based on a 1" x 1" avitar pic and a longing that has been inside me for centuries?

 

[seaturtle50]

Well ... that and a few words

Very few

 

[seaturtle50]

Sorry, meant to say ...

"insight" and 3/4" x 3/4" webcam pic.







Bear with me ... this is a serious thread to me and I am very interested in all responses. I'm just in a literal mood right now.


Sea_turtle50
My Sorrows are my Joys

 

[clintonmdboy]

I've become attached to "e people" before in chat rooms. we would chat til 3 or 4 in the morning and talk about our problems and passions and sex and philosophy and politics...and I would look forward to getting home from work so I could chat w/ her... I was smitten... and either we'd meet or it would fizzle. I don't know if you can make long term connections w/o human contact...

 

[bamagirl]

you can very easily get attached online and very fast.
Just be careful because you can just as easily be hurt.

A lot of real life relationships started online and have worked out great.

I wish you lots of luck

 

[seaturtle50]

Thanks to all responders

Great comments! Thanks

I do not care about being hurt. Hurt is my companion. I have no fear in that arena ... anymore.

 

[bamagirl]

Well then you have no worries.
Just enjoy the relationship hun

 

[seaturtle50]

I agree with your tag line bamagirl

Love cannot endure indifference - However in my experience that is only a partial truth. It may of course be the "ideal"

I have found in my case that my love for my beloved is self-contained. I need only breath in order for it to exist. It is mine, and mine alone. It is certainly enhansed by the nurturing of my beloved (understatement of the century candidate?) but is all mine, none the less. I am the type of person that wants (is driven) to give it freely, yet it remains only mine to give.

I could experience it fully, and never even let my beloved know. And she would not have to acknowledge. Certainly she would still know. Women know! (God, I love women, they are either the perfect respite or the perfect God joke on man - not sure which - most likely both )

Michael

 

[bamagirl]

Love cannot endure indifference - However in my experience that is only a partial truth. It may of course be the "ideal"

I have found in my case that my love for my beloved is self-contained. I need only breath in order for it to exist. It is mine, and mine alone. It is certainly enhansed by the nurturing of my beloved (understatement of the century candidate?) but is all mine, none the less. I am the type of person that wants (is driven) to give it freely, yet it remains only mine to give.

I could experience it fully, and never even let my beloved know. And she would not have to acknowledge. Certainly she would still know. Women know! (God, I love women, they are either the perfect respite or the perfect God joke on man - not sure which - most likely both )

Michael

Your far differnt than most my dear,but your cute

 

[Pyro Paul]

You feel as if your becoming emotionaly attached to a person near instantly over an internet only because opposed to in real life where you encounter a persons looks, persoality, friends, and life. on the internet, you directly encounter the persons Emotions feelings and desiers. amonimity helps push this along as most are more open online than they are in real life.

you can become emotionaly attached to people simply because of their emotions. problems such as friends, lifestyle, looks can be over come if you have a strong emotional tie. where as if you have no emotional tie (such as when you walk into a bar) then it is the reverse, you must mesh life styles friends and looks untill an emotional bond makes itself.

 

[bamagirl]

You feel as if your becoming emotionaly attached to a person near instantly over an internet only because opposed to in real life where you encounter a persons looks, persoality, friends, and life. on the internet, you directly encounter the persons Emotions feelings and desiers. amonimity helps push this along as most are more open online than they are in real life.

you can become emotionaly attached to people simply because of their emotions. problems such as friends, lifestyle, looks can be over come if you have a strong emotional tie. where as if you have no emotional tie (such as when you walk into a bar) then it is the reverse, you must mesh life styles friends and looks untill an emotional bond makes itself.

well said Paul

 

[seaturtle50]

Why Thank You

Thanks for noticing bamagirl!

 

[babydoll2u]

I find it very easy to get attached to someone online.... I have and probably will again, but after a particularly bad experience, I've learned to be oh-so-careful, lol.

Why is it so easy? You are completely bypassing the "physical trappings" that may or may not attract you to the other person. What you're going for is the "gold", that thing that could take weeks, even months to do offline...
you're learning about the other person from the inside out.

Feelings, thoughts, desires, hopes, dreams, plans, wants, likes, dislikes... all SO easy to discuss when not sitting face to face, when not "interrupted" by physical attraction, etc.

SO yes, it's easy, and at times, dangerous. Why? Because sadly, the person on the other computer isn't what he/she portrays themself to be. I call them "players". There are plenty here on Lit, just as there are elsewhere on the internet, and can be men or women.

You just have to be careful. But hey... I know of three, no, 4 couples on Lit who met AT Lit... I shot the wedding for one of the couples this past May.

It can happen

 

[bamagirl]

Thanks for noticing bamagirl!

 

[seaturtle50]

thanks babydoll2U

You are obviously a luv! Please be SUPER careful by the way. Remember: Safety First (drop and roll and all that

 

[babydoll2u]

You are obviously a luv! Please be SUPER careful by the way. Remember: Safety First (drop and roll and all that

I think I should elaborate just a bit. The person I feel for (at the moment - answering my own question - yes - I am a FREAK ) is really not saying much of anything. She has said a few words that have great import to me - but she probably does not even realize that.

Anyway - ... (feeling like a sucker right now) - it really is the way she looks. I have stared into her eyes (in a pic <sob, sob> (sounds icky as I write it). I see so much there. I found myself looking off and on (like every 2 minutes - I just lied - I did it more often than that) I am quite smitten. She send me a wonderful, hot, highly erotic, full body pic and I spent most of my time staring into her eyes. like 99% of my time. I have a world of jucy porn at my fingertips - and I'm staring into her eyes. (Dont call the psych squad - I'm F.I.N.E.) (Boy and I probably going to regret posting this later)

Granted - I am smitten with what I "think" I see, yet I have have to say (at risk of more ick) I am an excellent judge of character. I have made much $$$ in my career due to this - I have refined my ability, on purpose.

And there she is. If you could see my reaction when I look at her lips. OK - That is enough out of me. I am not going to respond to any other comments left here (at least for quite a while

I promise to just listen!

Like I said sweetie... I have learned to be oh-so-careful

 

[seaturtle50]

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

The heart is a vessel
it knows when you care

It's made to be emptied
of pain and despair

So we go on the net
to find solace and hope

The other on the line
helps us learn and to cope

A piece of machinery
a screen we do find

Our dreams can come true
if only online



The eyes tell a story turtle look deep and you will know.

 

[seaturtle50]

Your Turning Me On DomShe

Yes they certainly do. I must admit - been bad and staring into those eyes again this evening. They tell more than a "story" though ... Something remarkable there!

The heart is a vessel
it knows when you care

It's made to be emptied
of pain and despair

So we go on the net
to find solace and hope

The other on the line
helps us learn and to cope

A piece of machinery
a screen we do find

Our dreams can come true
if only online



The eyes tell a story turtle look deep and you will know.

 

[Guest]

OOOO Such an enticing title

Then you should follow your heart

 

[seaturtle50]

Ummmmmm

I've fallen down in cyber world and I ......

Then you should follow your heart