how is a female supposed to...

[lisa123414]

......

 

[Zeb_Carter]

don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

Yes, people who point fingers are people with small minds.

I do wonder why people care about what you do in your private life as long as it's legal is beyond me. I don't particularly care what my neighbor is doing. Unless of course they are having an orgy and didn't invite me. But, I would think no less of them. Actually, they may even move up a few notches in my book if they were having orgies.

If they post on Lit. why should I care? Why should anyone care? True there are some professions where it might be frowned upon, but how does posting here matter if you do your job without Lit. interfering?

Just because I post Mother/Son incest doesn't mean I ever had sex with my mother nor does it mean I wanted too. Same goes for LW. I may write it, but I can guarantee I don't practice what I write.

Now though, I am at a point in my life that I don't care who knows. I won't post my real name here or anything, but if someone sent a PM say they were going to let the world know I write "nasty sex stories" I just laugh and tell them to go ahead.

Everyone I would care about knowing is dead or already knows. Those that don't know might look down at me, but fuck them if they can't take a joke.

I know some people would be bothered by some jerk outing them and that is so sad. That some jerk would even threaten that. They must be a pretty low down petty piece of pond scum to even think about it. It's none of their business, yet there are those out there that would try to control every aspect of our lives.

Then there is the question, what is the person pointing fingers doing on Lit?

I would turn it around on someone who asked if I wrote smut on Lit.

What's Lit? Who did you hear that from? Keep pressing until they told me or dropped it.

Sorry, now I'm rambling.

 

[TE999]

don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

I, personally, don't care if I'm 'outed'. I'm proud of my stories on here and if people don't like them, tough noogies. Take your 19th Century attitudes and shove them up your ass.

That being said, I could see if one was in a profession that was image conscious or overly sanctimonious and one was 'outed' there could be some flak, but it's not a firing offense ... and you'd have a dandy lawsuit against them that would make them look like the prudish assholes that they are.

Don't worry about it, lisa.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I think it would depend on what you wrote, to a small extent. There are some categories that would make a man seem pretty unsavory if he were outed that he wrote them. Maybe more in some cases than a woman.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

I think it would depend on what you wrote, to a small extent. There are some categories that would make a man seem pretty unsavory if he were outed that he wrote them. Maybe more in some cases than a woman.

I could see if you wrote kiddy porn, but no one here does that. I certainly don't. Or if you wrote snuff stories. Or any of that stuff on the chart Dr. M posted.

 

[sr71plt]

don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

Wanna bet on that?

 

[Stella_Omega]

I could see if you wrote kiddy porn, but no one here does that. I certainly don't. Or if you wrote snuff stories. Or any of that stuff on the chart Dr. M posted.

Speaking strictly for myself, if I found out that a co-worker wrote fetish for lit i would be looking askance at him a little bit. And if he wrote incest, I might hide a chuckle or two. And if he wrote non-con I would be forever studying him, trying to see where the worm lives in his head...

But that's just me.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Speaking strictly for myself, if I found out that a co-worker wrote fetish for lit i would be looking askance at him a little bit. And if he wrote incest, I might hide a chuckle or two. And if he wrote non-con I would be forever studying him, trying to see where the worm lives in his head...

But that's just me.

And there you go...

I have written Non-Consent and BDSM, to tell the truth I have no desire to actually do those things. Same with Incest, I have no desire for it, yet the public likes to read it. Go figure. Same with LW, NC, BDSM, they like to read it, but heaven forbid they know anyone who writes it.

 

[Stella_Omega]

And there you go...

I have written Non-Consent and BDSM, to tell the truth I have no desire to actually do those things. Same with Incest, I have no desire for it, yet the public likes to read it. Go figure. Same with LW, NC, BDSM, they like to read it, but heaven forbid they know anyone who writes it.

well, yeah! Because we all know that we are trustworthy and a real good person, even though we read a little smut once in a while... But those people who write it, who think of those things...

it's hypocrisy of course, of a very human kind.

 

[oggbashan]

It all depends on how the outing happens and what spin is put on it.

In the UK, being outed as a Lit author if you are a teacher or have substantial contact with children, despite Lit's over 18 rule, could lead to dismissal and barring from practising your profession.

 

[lovecraft68]

don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

To the contrary, many find women who write erotica 'hot'. It's why many men take on female pen names. I understand there are some careers that if you were found to be writing porn it might be a problem but otherwise I am not so sure gender plays in here.

Also depends what you write. You say erotica, it sounds sexy, you say incest porn it's like "What?". I would also think a man admitting he writes Gay male might take some heat (especially if he is not gay or is, but not open about it)

Personally most who know me know I write erotica. I'm a warehouse manager who gives a shit? Some even know its incest and I have taken some cracks (especially because I have daughters. I have never nor will ever write daddy/daughter stories but its the first thing some people think) but at the end of the day who are you here to make happy? Yourself or the asshole trying to mock you?

On the otherhand like I said I do understandf about careers. My wife is on here and posts dirty little 20 question threads and does some role playing over IM. She is a certified life coach, runs a dietary program out of a doctors office and is also a councilor at a shelter for abused women so she keeps the lit stuff to herself. For that matter becuase we enjoy some BDSM once in awhile there are aspects of her sex life she will not discuss as well.

End of the day it's like something my grandmother used to say. "If you are ashamed of it you shouldn't be doing it. Otherwise don't worry about what other people think.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Alts are the hallmark of the middle-class. Low class and high class cant care less what others think. I dont care, and use my real name.

Retired columnist Florence King says she published 50 plus fuck books before finding a writing job, and isnt shy at all about her life. Only the shopkeeper class care what you know.

From what I read in the paper people go to jail for anything and everything, and some get away with murder. A local guy murdered his dad, told the judge RED BULL made him do it, and the judge let him go. An old woman is doing 90 days in county jail for planting veggies in her yard.

 

[PennLady]

I worry a tad about what some of the older members of my family will think, but then, I just don't tell them. And that's even more because the fall out would come on to my parents, I'm sure. "Did you know she did that? Oh, oh, oh!"

But I'm sure it depends on various things, and let's not fool ourselves. It was, what, a month ago or so that a female teacher lost her job because of just this? I'm not sure that either men or women are more at risk than the other. Since men, I think, are perceived as more likely to be a sexual predator, they may have more to risk.

 

[rgraham666]

I don't worry about being outed myself. Any one who spends more than five minutes with me knows I'm a twisted individual.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I think most people I know already know that I have written smut. I don't do much to hide it.

 

[hottchic]

It all depends on how the outing happens and what spin is put on it.

In the UK, being outed as a Lit author if you are a teacher or have substantial contact with children, despite Lit's over 18 rule, could lead to dismissal and barring from practising your profession.

Hmmmm...... It still depends on the content of what the person writes I think, I do not think just the fact that somebody writes on Lit would be sufficient reason for dismissal as a teacher, coming from the UK myself, and I not talking here about somebody who only writes in non-erotic catagories.

I am not a teacher myself, but if I were and the issue of dismissal came up, I would take my employer to court, and make all my erotic stories that I wrote on Lit available for scrutiny. They would have to prove to me why anything that I wrote would make me unsuitable as a teacher.

One thing is clear, if I am writing anonymously on a website which is for people over the age of 18, then non of the kids that I teach should be reading it, and if they were then they wouldn't know that I had written it.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I don't worry about being outed myself. Any one who spends more than five minutes with me knows I'm a twisted individual.

DEAR READER

WHAT ROB MEANS IS, WHEN HE TRIES TO CONNECT THE LOGICAL DOTS HE CANT GET FROM HERE TO THERE WITHOUT BEING SUCKED INTO A TORNADO AND TRANSPORTED TO A PLACE OF VERY SHORT PEOPLE.

 

[oggbashan]

Hmmmm...... It still depends on the content of what the person writes I think, I do not think just the fact that somebody writes on Lit would be sufficient reason for dismissal as a teacher, coming from the UK myself, and I not talking here about somebody who only writes in non-erotic catagories.

I am not a teacher myself, but if I were and the issue of dismissal came up, I would take my employer to court, and make all my erotic stories that I wrote on Lit available for scrutiny. They would have to prove to me why anything that I wrote would make me unsuitable as a teacher.

One thing is clear, if I am writing anonymously on a website which is for people over the age of 18, then non of the kids that I teach should be reading it, and if they were then they wouldn't know that I had written it.

It isn't a question of what would happen in court, but the witch-hunt that could be started by the press and public. A school would be reluctant to retain a teacher who was considered "perverted", "addicted to sexual fantasy", etc. because the parents might start removing their children to other schools.

As I said above, it depends on HOW the information is outed. Some communities might be proud of a successful Lit author. Others could be horrified that such a person is teaching their children.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Before I retired I tried to keep my teaching profession and my Lit life completely separate. I sometimes wonder about that. If a parent came complaining that their child's teacher wrote erotica I would have to ask how they knew. Anyone who reads our stuff has no grounds for complaining that we write it, after all.


Of course, now that I'm retired who GAF?

 

[bronzeage]

don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

It would depend upon how much your everyday life differs from the persona you project on-line.

I have always be out in the open. My friends and family know about my writing. No one was surprised, but my daughter in law, who also has a few stories posted on Lit.

If you intend to run for public office, it could be a problem.

 

[jomar]

As a tea party presidential hopeful, it might cause a bit of a stir if things got out.

 

[kitkat88]

To the contrary, many find women who write erotica 'hot'. It's why many men take on female pen names. I understand there are some careers that if you were found to be writing porn it might be a problem but otherwise I am not so sure gender plays in here.

Also depends what you write. You say erotica, it sounds sexy, you say incest porn it's like "What?". I would also think a man admitting he writes Gay male might take some heat (especially if he is not gay or is, but not open about it)

Personally most who know me know I write erotica. I'm a warehouse manager who gives a shit? Some even know its incest and I have taken some cracks (especially because I have daughters. I have never nor will ever write daddy/daughter stories but its the first thing some people think) but at the end of the day who are you here to make happy? Yourself or the asshole trying to mock you?

On the otherhand like I said I do understandf about careers. My wife is on here and posts dirty little 20 question threads and does some role playing over IM. She is a certified life coach, runs a dietary program out of a doctors office and is also a councilor at a shelter for abused women so she keeps the lit stuff to herself. For that matter becuase we enjoy some BDSM once in awhile there are aspects of her sex life she will not discuss as well.

End of the day it's like something my grandmother used to say. "If you are ashamed of it you shouldn't be doing it. Otherwise don't worry about what other people think.

Hey leave my 20 question threads alone before I start one here!

Then again I don't think it would be as much fun here. Got some real duds around here. Cept for your buddy Syd of course.

Oh, and by the way, you left out the part where I don't admit to people I married you, lest it damage my career.

 

[countryboy001]

Lisa: don't get me wrong, I know that women are welcome here, and yet the risk we take in posting - well, if I were outed I am quite sure the penalty I would pay would be much higher than that of my male peers.

any opinions?

====

I can see your point, but the stakes are high for many persons employed by the public. My suggestion is to be VERY CAREFUL: 1) Cover your trail. Don't give Lit an email address with your name, for example. Indeed, if use a hotmail address, in setting THAT up, do not use real info.

2) Don't drop clues: In one post you say you're in Duluth, in another that your husband is a plumber, and in another that your second child just had a tooth removed by the famous dentist of the western part of your city, Dr. Payne.

I'm not sure I can see the issue that would hurt a woman more, excepting of course, more women teach elementary school, for example. Perhaps in a bitter child custody dispute the "lifestyle" of the mother could be impugned. If you simply mean that in our society a woman's "loose morals" seem to count more than a man's (if the man's counts at all!), of course it's true. If a woman had done what McCain or Gingerich did, they'd be finished.

 

[hottchic]

It would depend upon how much your everyday life differs from the persona you project on-line.

I have always be out in the open. My friends and family know about my writing. No one was surprised, but my daughter in law, who also has a few stories posted on Lit.

If you intend to run for public office, it could be a problem.

If you were actually in public office I would say that it should not be a problem.

The classic example of this would be Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky, people would have to prove that your private activities would affect your ability to do your job.

In the case of somebody running for office, it would depend how the public reacted which would also depend on how the information was put across.

The culture of the country where you were running for office would also be important here, in a country like Holland or Italy, writing erotic literature potentially might increase your popularity.

 

[hottchic]

It isn't a question of what would happen in court, but the witch-hunt that could be started by the press and public. A school would be reluctant to retain a teacher who was considered "perverted", "addicted to sexual fantasy", etc. because the parents might start removing their children to other schools.

As I said above, it depends on HOW the information is outed. Some communities might be proud of a successful Lit author. Others could be horrified that such a person is teaching their children.

The way I see it is that what people do with there private lives provided it is not criminal and does not have a negative impact on other people in the comunity is not relevent to somebody carrying out their public role.

For example what about people who read erotic literature or watch porn, I can't imagine how many teachers might lose there jobs if these things were held against them.

I mean where would you draw the line, for example a teacher who was having an affair would be considered morally reprehensible by some parents, others might be uncomfortable if a teacher was gay or promiscuous or into group sex, some might even look down upon a person who is divorced, non of these are reasons for dismissal.

I agree that a teacher who went around proudly proclaiming that they wrote erotic literature to parents and kids and offering to show them their stories might be asking for dismissal, but I don't think we are talking about this here.

More likely I imagine we are talking about an anonymous Lit author who gets outed by somebody, and for that to happen given anonimity it would have to be by a vindictive person giving out information that was given to them in confidence.