how far would you go to protect your own

[faith]

the pain had to stop

I had but one goal in all of this, to stop the pain of one very good friend. It worked. Not in the way I thought it would but it did.
Communications have open up. People are talking. I offer a public apology to Honey for acting without her Okay. To Ari and Chele, I too was decieved. Things were said to me that I will not discuss on this board. Needless to say I am gaining a new perspective in all of this. I offer my apologies to both of you too.

Sincerely
faith


TO all those who have PM'ed me thank you for caring...

 

[Swashbuckler]

Seeing as how an aggressor can cowardly hide behind his monitor screen, thue denying us the sheer pleasure of splitting his skull in twine with a battle axe. And seeing how he will not leave our harried nad harrassed freind alone. I think that this is a perfect forum to tell the world just what a ghoul this person is bieng.

When not attacking friends of our that are hurt himself he sends minnions and lackeys to do his dirty work, to brign tears to her eyes for his pleasure.

No amount of suave, smooth talking can repair what you have done.

NOW LEAVE HER THE FUCK ALONE!!!!!

I am waiting with Faith, and I am not nearly as gentle, sir.

So listen well and leave her alone!



Faith has been so good as to post a thread so that we can get this out in the open. Hopefully our friend will at least read it before she leaves LIT and her true freinds forever. Thanks alot you effite snobbish punk! A sweeter freind no one could have known and you stab her in the back and drive her totally away. To escape you she is contemplating leaving us all. Thanks alot. Now get the hell away from her!

~Swash~

 

[Exosus]

Bugger what I just said... I have an idea of who the friend is, and all I must say is

Hunt the bastard down. Destroy him if you have to.

 

[Claymore]

That is up to you. But keep this in mind. If they chased her off the forum by making her uncomfortable or unhappy when she visited, doing the same thing to him would make you just as bad as him.

The best approach would be to let everyone know what this guy has done, so that they may decide to ignore him or not. Or contact a moderator, and tell them what's happening and who all the witnesses are to confirm what you say.

Also, is it me? I haven't been here for a week so I must greatly appologize if it's me. Though I get few PMs. And this sounds like something thats been going on for more than a week. Actually, I'd have to appologize if I'd been on for more than a week. But I haven't gotten to know too many folks yet, so in the time I've been on, if I've driven off someone that would make it even worse.

 

[TXExpress]

Fighting mad

Any group of people can be considered a chain. When something happens to one link in that chain, no matter its strength, the rest of the chain tightens and draws closer and becomes even stronger. Simple physics. If the chain remains broken, it is worthless.

Many here know the situation at hand better than I, but the clarity of it is unmistakable. A newbie I may well still be, but, though not with the same weaponry as some, a well-armed newbie nonetheless.

People come here for many reasons. I would hate to be even more of a newbie than I am and come here wondering where the writing is; why everything is fucked up by threads of divisiveness and venom. Seems clear that a large part of the answer has been exposed here.

Fuck the prose. Go away. Leave our friend alone. Do no further damage.

 

[Ldy Tehari]

Words can cut sharper than any steel and deeper than any bone can stop, but we should count which words we afford that weight.
In my own humble opinion, I think that a chorus of many can out-scream the words of one small humphrey bogart wannabe.. frankly I say take your 5 ft buck toothed, lisping, ego off the soapbox, the camera isn't rolling.
I don't think she should leave just because of one person. I think she should stop being harrassed, and I think she should stay. There are soo many other things about Lit to enjoy than a couple of measely dead threads. There are warm living friends around and I Thank you faith for creating this thread so we could show you friend just how loud the crowd can scream.
*smiling softly*

 

[SexyChele]

First, I would say that by going into each of the threads this man is on and defaming his name will only cause you to lose respect in the sight of all the writers on this board. It has already been done before, by a woman who no one now respects nor takes seriously. If you want that to be you, go for it.

Second, if your friend is having problems being harassed on the board, then it is up to her to deal with it. There are avenues here to do just that. Reporting it to a moderator is step number 1. The "ignore" feature here at Lit works very well - she will neither see his postings nor will any PMs get through to her. If she has contact with him through IM, all she need do is simply block his name. Many simple solutions. If she is being "harassed", it is of her own choosing.

Third, there are always three sides to every story - his, hers, and the truth. Without finding out his side, how are you certain you know the entire truth? People often will tell their friends things to gain sympathy - it is not unheard of. You cannot be certain of all things that have occurred between the two, unless you were privy to every conversation, every message they delivered and/or said to each other.

Many times people threaten to leave Lit. It has become the tactic of choice to attempt to get something a person wants, with sympathy. If some one chooses to leave Lit, that is their own concern. If it is not a well-thought out decision, or one made in haste, I pity them.

What should you do? Why get involved, unless you know every fact about the events? Quite frankly, if you know only one side of the story, then the man in question has every right to question your credibility - and to do it here, publically. If you wish that, then I would suggest you rethink your position. Your friend may be the one who has much to lose - more so than the man in question.

Are there things going on that are causing division on the board? Hell yes. And there are people working behind the scenes with your friend to try to bring about reconciliation.

Before taking action, think. Before proclaiming loyalty to any one person, consider the idea that you may not have all the facts to base your opinion on.

"Better to stay quiet and let people think you a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt." A quote well worth reciting here. And one maybe all of us need to keep in mind before bringing this to public light.

Claymore: no, this has nothing to do with you. Nothing whatsoever.

 

[AngelicVixxxen]

The friends join forces.
The circle closes, with swords drawn to protect one of their own.
Together in the virtual and real worlds, they prepare to push back the forces of evil.
Together to support and to encourage, their trust in each other is strong and unwaivering.
Their bonds cannot, and will not, be broken.
No one will destroy this family.
I make the observation that the soul slayer obviously has nothing better to do with his time. What a colossal waste of a life... try to find something constructive to do for a change. If you are happy in the real world then you wouldn't seek to destroy in this one. And if you are unhappy, you could have found some solace here if you had had any decency in you at all.
The Angel is gone.
The Vixen has arrived.

 

[caspai]

It is interesting to me, Chele...

...that although not a single person stated a single name, that you are able to determine so easily who they have been speaking of. Would you care to tell us the name of that person? Could it be that the accusations actually do have merit?

 

[Honey_B]

I am always amazed at the support of friends. You are all incredible people and I cherish these friendships. However, your anger is misdirected as was mine. The people who know this story, know of my difficulties with two people. One woman who can be assertive, blunt and sometimes abrasive and the other a man who is easily deceived. I was deeply hurt by something I thought they did to me. I was angry because I thought they had hurt another, a friend as deeply as I had been hurt.

Yesterday I learned that the friend is The Ousel, or so she calls herself. In other words, the essence of jealousy. Together, I thought we had built a friendship and were close friends of the male writer. I thought her to be as hurt by his betrayals as I was. She said as much. It was she who convinced me that a female writer was posing as another a newcomer to hurt me. And she wanted me to publically denouce this writer. It was she who told me that our mutual friend could not be trusted because what she had told him was not held in confidence.

Why would she do this? I've asked myself the question so many times. I do know that she has written with the writer in question for a very long time and it was he that brought her to LIT. To show her what the site was like, he gave her two threads to read. One that I had worked on with him, and one written by that assertive female author. The Ousel has expressed jealousy on occasions when she was not shown the proper attention in his posts. I believe she meant to sever my contact with this author and have me destroy her other rival in retallitory anger.

The male writer has not been haressing me in so much as he has been trying to find out the truth. It was not until we talked last night, really talked, that my suspicions were confirmed. A very wise author on this size keeps talking about the importance of communication. I had closed down communications with him. Never a good thing to do until all the information has been shared.

This is about as clear as I can make the story in this venue. I will be sending out PM that fill in the necessary blanks. But let me just say this to the Ousel. LIT is a place of creativity and sharing. No one person can own another. You will never grow as a writer or as a person if you do not let go of your hateful emotions.

 

[germangent]

Good points Chele, but...

I would never stray from helping a friend and standing by them in times of of trouble.

Your points are very well made and are logical Chele. And given other circumstances - in the workplace for example - I would totally agree with your reasoning and recommendations and would even act the same way.

However, I must admit that there is a emotional component as well since I made friends with a number of people on LIT. And when friends are attacked or driven away, I need to make a stand (that is obviously a very personal viewpoint and it is as good as any other one).

Given the fact - as you pointed out very well - that only the parties involved really know the truth (and one could argue that there are at least two truths) I would always take the side of the one being attacked. But you are right in what you would recommend as a recourse:

1. Work behind the scenes
2. Report the matter to a trusted third party (e.g. the moderator)
3. Set the person on Ignore

but also

4. Show your friend that that you are there for them and comfort your friend.

IMHO attack is not the right solution - but standing up to defend and comfort a friend.

 

[ariosto]

Time for peace...

There has been much bitterness engendered in the last two weeks. Some friendships have been tested to the breaking point, some friendships may have broken. We live here in a world of difficult communications without the benefit of gesture, inflection, expression so we rely on the keyboard to convey almost everything. Words come to have a power that can wound.

And words can heal as well. I appreciate all of your displays of loyalty even though your anger was directed at me. I hope you will appreciate then the loyalty of one who came to my support. I I want to put an end to the bitterness. It's past time.

Honey has summed up the situation as it seems to be pretty well.
The revelations last night are very difficult for me to deal with and I will have to seek my own reckoning with the party involved. To say I am
reeling this day is no understatement.

I think that we can all learn from this.
What we think is true may not be and until all the facts are known, communication must flow.
Honey and I will be posting together again and I can't tell you how good that makes me feel.

 

[kitsuke]

And the dread gnomon shifts from ten to two
blame falls again
Divisiveness and anger rule the day
and all fall dead

 

[Tibxo]

Can I suggest that this matter should be settled privately by the parties concerned and the rest of us stay out of it?

All of us jumping on the bandwagon just makes a nasty situation nastier.

 

[BLACK BART]

One Tin Soldier

Gotta agree with the cooler heads here...Claymore, Chele,GermanGent and Tibvo...

All that has come of this open forum is more hurt feelings and distress to all that read the words.

Looking at this thread I see the names of people I have admired and even had the pleasure to write with.

And yes, I mean everyone...I come to this site to enjoy myself, to ooh and ahh at the words put down, to even chuckle at the humour...I don't think anyone comes here to feel bad or deliberately make others feel that way.

Please, look at the numbers viewing this and realize there is a ripple effect going on...the longer this bitterness remains, the deeper the pain stays with us all.

Each of you is a brilliant and creative person, able to make us thrilled with a few short phrases, why not go back to what we all enjoy???

And yes, by all means, please settle it off the boards and hopefully soon. Time is better spent enjoying each other than destroying.......

 

[Cutie Lillie]

I think the healing is coming.. so just hold on ..

I am glad to see that those involved have been talking.. and that healing is near.

That we can get back to being the great group of writers we all are...

That the people behind monitors respect that there are others behind other monitors with real feelings....

And..I'm happy that I can send a great big collective group hug to EVERYONE !!!!


Chisel in hand stood a sculptor boy
Which his marble block before him,
And his eyes lit up with a smile of joy,
As an angel-dream passed o'er him.

He carved the dream on the shapless stone,
With many a sharp incision;
With heaven's own light the sculpture shone, --
He'd caught that angel-vision.

Children of life are we, as we stand
With our lives uncarved before us,
Waiting the hour when, at God's command,
Our life-dream shall pass o'er us.

If we carve it then on the yielding stone,
With many a sharp incision,
Its heavenly beauty shall be our own, --
Our lives, that angel-vision.

--Life Sculpture
by George Washington Doane

 

[AngelicVixxxen]

Angel returns… sorry that people have been hurt, but very pleased to see that the lines of communication have opened up, friends have shown their support, and wounds are being healed.



Speech may sometimes do harm, but so may silence and a worse harm at that.
No insult ever caused so deep a wound as a tenderness expected and withheld;
And no spoken indiscretion was ever so bitterly regretted as the word that one did not speak.
[Anon]



Oh, the comfort –
The inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person,
Having neither to weigh thoughts,
Nor measure words –
But pouring them all right out –
Just as they are –
Chaff and grain together –
Certain that a faithful hand will
Take and sift them –
Keep what is worth keeping –
And with the breath of kindness
Blow the rest away.
[D.M. Mulock Craik]