How did you get started?

[Felt Tip]

I'm interested in the whole Dom thing, but I have no real experience, it's just an idea at the moment.

I'm interested to hear how people got started as a Dom(me), how they discovered it within themselves, how you first started to engage in BDSM.

At the moment I'm single. I'm not sure whether I should be looking for a 'normal' girl to then see if we head down this road together, or if I should look for a sub when, lets face it, I don't really know what I'm doing.

Thanks, FT

 

[Sir_Winston54]

I'm interested in the whole Dom thing, but I have no real experience, it's just an idea at the moment.

I'm interested to hear how people got started as a Dom(me), how they discovered it within themselves, how you first started to engage in BDSM.

At the moment I'm single. I'm not sure whether I should be looking for a 'normal' girl to then see if we head down this road together, or if I should look for a sub when, lets face it, I don't really know what I'm doing.

Thanks, FT

FT,

The Dominant/submissive relationship is a complex one. It requires a large amount of commitment on both parties, but *especially* the Dom/me. Presumably, you had some interest, whether you knew what it was called, long before now - perhaps even pre-puberty. An excellent resource for both novice and experienced Dominants is http://www.castlerealm.com - even after more than 30 years as a practicing Dominant, I visit there frequently!

You asked how people "got started." For me, I realized I had unusual interests, especially spanking a pretty female bottom, even before I reached puberty. Then when I was 14, a 14-year-old girl deliberately kicked a soccer-type ball directly into my groin from about 6 feet away, and then laughed. I dragged her over to a convenient spot, yanked her across my thighs and proceeded to spank the devil out of the little witch. When I finished and let her up (my hand was sore!), she ran off crying and cursing at me.

The next day, however, as I passed her door, she asked me in... and when I sat down, promptly laid herself back across my thighs and said, "Do it again?"

You say, "I'm not sure whether I should be looking for a 'normal' girl to then see if we head down this road together, or if I should look for a sub when, lets face it, I don't really know what I'm doing."

*My* response to that is:
Do some research.
Go to Castle Realm and read. Check out some of their resource links.
***Look in your area for BDSM groups, clubs, organizations. They're not hard to locate online, especially in the UK, and they can provide you a wealth of information. You can draw on the experience of others, while witnessing at least some of what can and does occur within the BDSM world.***

Open your eyes, your mind and your heart. If you do, you will find what you seek, whether it is a life in or out of the world of BDSM.

The best of luck and life to you...

 

[Felt Tip]

Thanks Sir Winston,

By the sounds of things, I think finding a local community would be a good starting place. After reading some of the stuff on the castle realm site of course.

I appreciate the help

FT

 

[moonshiner45]

hello all. in my opinion spanking does not necessarily mean submission. a lot of women like to be spanked that are far from submissive.

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

Very good point, moonshiner. Just because someone likes, say spanking or candle wax, doesn't necessarily mean they're into real BDSM.