How can I get my girlfriend...

[NovaGuy]

How can I get my girlfriend involved with my ass. I love self anal play, prostate stimulation, and I have my own toy. She herself isn't into anal sex. I am not sure how to bring her into my pleasure. In passing I had mentioned something to the extent of a woman who blew me before used her finger on me and I liked it, but it appears she didn't get the hint or blew it off.

 

[Guest]

 

[NovaGuy]

hehe, thanks emerald

 

[ApplesMcgee]

so true

.....

 

[NovaGuy]

Thing is I am really happy in the relationship and I don't want to scare or offend her. Just ease her into my turn-on's/fetishes or whatever you want to call them. She didn't exactly sign up for this.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

Have you tried being upfront and honest with her? Ask her what she thinks and see what she says. If she says no, I wouldnt push it, you are right thinking it could scare her off. Since I don't know how long you have been together, I wonder if you are trying to incorporate this too soon.

 

[lilpriss]

You just have to trust her enough to tell her.

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times.... people would be surprised at what might turn another on, given the chance.

Fear of being judged or laughed at can stop anyone, but this is an ass-pect (hehe) of who you are... if she feels compelled to hurt you with her newfound knowledge, then she doesn't really love you at all. Love is about trusting and accepting your partner for what they are. And doing what you know makes that person happy.

I hated some of my ex BF's habits, but I loved him and accepted those things. And the one's I'm thinking of weren't what ultimately broke us up.

We all have things that we are afraid will scare our mates away, and really sometimes it will actually make you closer.

 

[sweetnpetite]

How can I get my girlfriend involved with my ass. I love self anal play, prostate stimulation, and I have my own toy. She herself isn't into anal sex. I am not sure how to bring her into my pleasure. In passing I had mentioned something to the extent of a woman who blew me before used her finger on me and I liked it, but it appears she didn't get the hint or blew it off.

Tell her that you like it. She may be afraid that you don't like it, or that you don't want to admit you like it. Some men are really sensitive about that area, feeling that if they enjoy any anal stimulation that either there gay or that someone will think there gay. By letting her know that you are secure enough to admit that you like it, she might not be afraid to try more often. If she doesn't like to do it, suggest gloves or toys and then if she still thinks its icky, you'll have to save it for solo. Personally, I'm always afraid to go there because I'm not sure if it will be well recieved and without good comunication theres no way to tell if you're doing it right, ie- does it hurt or do you not want to do it at all? Men are always trying to poke around down there, so we know it can HURT. Hope this helps.

 

[crazybbwgirl]

Hey Nova - how 'bout writing a letter or an email? Sometimes its easier to say things in writing rather than face to face. Or maybe ask her what her most wildest fantasy is - then maybe she'll ask you!

 

[lilpriss]

HEY!! I GOT A GREAT IDEA FROM THAT LAST POST!!!

You could play that game where you ask a question you both have to answer openly and honestly... I like THAT game.

I played that with a chat buddy and it was FUN FUN FUN! AND it was a BIG turn on too.

You could do it online if you think it would make things easier. Or you could turn it into a drinking game!

I think you could ease right into the subject... (hehe)

You know, (for example) <of course>

Topic : partying
first time drunk
first time passed out
where?
first time puked (where?)
most embarrassing party foul
ever shown any body parts during a drunken binge
ever heard about your insanity later
(these are all pretty basic answerable questions... so your reason for drinking is not answering fast enough... 5 seconds)

Topic : sex

craziest locale...
scariest thing you can think of...
worst experience...
best...
the craziest thing you've ever heard of...
something you NEVER want to do...
something you've always wanted to do...
something dark that you'd like to try but have up until now have kept to yourself...
(reason for drinking not wanting to answer)

You know how to play that game!

Although, it IS much easier to play with someone you don't know all that well... BUT at the end of the game you know your partner even better. And if you play it while drinking you can always later say, "HEY! I was drunk!" And if you do the drinking version the rule is when you have to drink, you have to do a shot of some booze of choice... NO BEER SIPPING ALLOWED

Since this IS your GF I wouldn't get too detailed about actual experiences or people of the past... but more on hypothetical things. You don't want to end up thinking ill of each other.

Maybe I just need to get drunk, but heck that sounds fun...
Damn I'm full of great ideas!

 

[crazybbwgirl]

That's a good idea lil. We used to play a game called "I never" One person would start "I never stole candy from the store" or whatever, and whoever HAD done that had to take a drink. So of course it always ended up with stuff like "I never had sex with 2 guys at once" and someone would have to drink. or whatever! fun game -mmmmm maybe we should play that again soon?

 

[Guest]

You need to be totally up front with her - just tell her.

Wait for a time when you're relaxed and have time to talk, maybe right after sex. Don't plan on getting involved anally at that time - give her a chance to prepare for it mentally.

Allow her the time to think about it, but if she is not at all interested, you'll need to respect her wishes (unfortunately!)

(Hopefully she has just been waiting for this opportunity for the two of you to explore each other in that way!)

Good luck!