Household Dildos...

[Lust Engine]

My birthday. Yay!

That would go great with my Cucumber Salad.

S.

Oh no! Here we go again with the salad thing!

Sorry, my mind is still mulling over a bad pun involving the Salad Shooter.

 

[sheath]

Oh no! Here we go again with the salad thing!

Sorry, my mind is still mulling over a bad pun involving the Salad Shooter.

*snicker, snicker*

The salad jokes are going to run rampant again...

Damn, where is Pink when you need her?



S.

 

[ABN_Ranger]

Could be worse... could involve a cookie press.

 

[sheath]

Could be worse... could involve a cookie press.

And if Ang plays her cards right, there might be a story about a cookie press to share by the time morning rolls around.



S.

 

[ABN_Ranger]

I acually have NO witty comeback for that one... I'm stupified. Good one babe... you dumbfounded a talking monkey... Guess you get the cookie.

 

[CelticFrog]

*sigh*
no stories about cookie presses.

But I was wondering... where IS Pink?!?!?!?

I miss her.

Ang

 

[SlowGuy]

Cucumbers are a little big, I finally got the courage to go out and buy a dildo, just the thought of using it later turns me on

Glad to hear you got the right tool. A friend of mine used one of those cylindrical shampoo bottles you get in a hotel. Kinda blunt and there's nothing to keep it from disappearing.

Is this going to be part of a photo essay, perhaps? Kind of a National Geographic Explorer special?

-- Slo

 

[Lavantrius]

This is a really really old post, I can see, but might i bring it up again? I have the same problem of parents discovering a dildo in my room or anywhere else. What I use are these danimal bottles. http://www.dannon.com/dn/dnstore/cgi-bin/ProdSubEV_Cat_240859_SubCat_241514_NavRoot_200.htm

Seem to work pretty well.

 

[human_male]

Ahhhh but I've got no place to hide a real dildo either, my parents or friends would probilly find it.

This may sound kinda stoopid but here's something you could do if you're worried about it being found. Put it back in it's packaging after use and stick a note on it addressed to you by some fictitious email friend suggesting it's a joke gift from them. That way if someone finds it they'll read the note and think someone's sent it to you as a gag.

Or do what I do and tape a note to it saying: "Well you've found it. Nice going. Now you're embarrassed and I'm embarrassed. Thanks asshole."

 

[human_male]

it is very dangerous to use anything but a butt plug ---- if you cannot go into a shop, buy one on line. ya think it might be embarrassing to go into a shop to buy one? wait till you are in the emergency room having something removed from you

Are you sure? Wouldn't using a soft dildo be ok?

 

[buttplugged]

Please people dont use random items to stick up your ass

For those people who are less than discriminating about what the stick up there ass, please be careful. The rectum, which lies just on the other side of the anus, is made up of some rather delicate tissue. Not tissue paper delicate but not as sturdy as say saddle leather. Don’t use anything sharp, like the pointed end of a carrot. A carrot would be plenty sharp enough to tear the lining. Once you perforate a bowel, sepsis is almost guaranteed, and a healthy body doesn’t do well when exposed to fecal flora (i.e., e-coli)

Others have mentioned about the it being more embarrassing to get an object removed in the ER than getting caught with a sex toy. How about this for embarrassing, a colostomy bag, because you had to have you lower intestine removed do to a perfed bowel. I think that having to wear a bag of shit on your waste would be enough incentive to use the right tool for the job.

Get a proper butt toy, something soft, like cyber skin, silicone, whatever, and nothing sharp. Not aluminum cans (everyone knows how sharp and crushed aluminum can is), shampoo bottle (hell no, most plastic bottle have seams on them, owe), veggies would be safer, just be careful. Your friends and family should be rummaging through your private stuff anyway. And if someone were to find it and have a problem with you being more sexually enlightened than they are, then so what, they have the problem, not you.

Just be careful and don’t hurt yourself, because a sore ass is no fun.

 

[Qina]

I haven't seen it online anywhere yet, but at a "pleasures" party I went to, the woman showed us a pillow that was designed to hide things. She put a glass dildo in it, zipped it up and handed it arround the room. The zipper was very hard to find and smooshing it as much as possible, we couldn't find any hard spot.

 

[lesbstuff]

High quality cigar tubes can also work nicely. You can go into any decent cigar shop and browse around and find ones that come pre-packaged in high quality tubes of hard plastic and stuff like that. I think you'll find that the shape is right, plus its an excuse to have a cigar!

 

[Private_Label]

If you cant face going to a shop, use mail order, havent found a company yet that ships stuff in bright yellow box with WARNING CONTAINS ANAL DILDO stamped on it.

Good Vibrations are very discrete, they have both online shopping or you can get a catalog (also very discrete) and do the mail order route.

Plus they have a stores in San Francisco(2) and Berkley(1).

My vibrators arrived in a plain cardboard box, and the return address was NOT in eye catching LARGE DAYGLOW COLORS. I used them more than 10 years ago the first time I bought a vibrator and a few *ahem* erotic books. I'm still impressed with their low key delivery approach.

 

[throbbin bob]

Just curious I know this question has been brought up before but I couldn't find the threads.

Whats the best thing around the house you could use for a anal dildo, I've tried carrots but they feel pretty rough and I'm not too game about going into a shop and buying a dildo.

I've also tried candles but they feel too smooth I think.

i found a great shoe tree in an overseas hotel, the handle was very long & smooth, but with continuous round ball shaped surface up the handle (like anal beads).... i of course stole the contraption from the hotel & keep it handy for those great occasions when i'm on my own! incredible pleasure, just wash it up after use & back in the closet (no one will every know... unless of course they catch me in the act). NOW THERE IS A GREAT BUSINESS IDEA FOR SEX TOY SHOPS!

 

[human_male]

I had the idea of hair brushes with handles that would be suitable for vaginal/anal pleasuring. The idea would be to sell them in supermarkets for people who don't want to buy a sex toy.

 

[biscorpio]

Just curious I know this question has been brought up before but I couldn't find the threads.

Whats the best thing around the house you could use for a anal dildo, I've tried carrots but they feel pretty rough and I'm not too game about going into a shop and buying a dildo.

I've also tried candles but they feel too smooth I think.

Your best bet if your worried about going to a store to buy a dildo try online. I just bought an 8 inch long 2 inch thick dildo from adameve.com & received a 50% any one item for being a first time shopper.

 

[bbw_sensual]

Household Dildos

Having worked in the Emergency Department as a nurse for almost 20 years I could tell you some stories of what has been found in various orifices. Most recently it was a vibrator that had gotten away and was too far up in the ass to get out without a surgeon using the tools of his trade. The funniest thing about it was that the x-rays (we have digital x-rays at our hospital) were so clear you could tell that there were no batteries in it.

If you're going to use something anally you need to be sure that it doesn't get away from you or your partner. The bowel will suck it right on up and in if you're not careful. That's why butt plugs work best.

To me the money spent for a toy designed for where and what you want is money well spent.