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HOLY FUCKING GAWD I DIDN'T GET LAID GAWDAMMIT

KillerMuffin

KillerMuffin

Seraphically Disinclined
Joined
Jul 29, 2000
Posts
25,603
I could just cry...

GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I'm going to KILL the StudMuffin, I swear, call him the NeuteredMuffin. Holy fuck. He gets a 12 hours pass and comes home to spend the day. Grampa nicely enough makes off with the kid for a couple of hours. Do I get laid? Oh no, of course not. Never mind that I'm climbing the walls here. I don't even get to see his penis, let alone play with it. I didn't even get much cuddling, about 15 minutes worth, one boob squeeze and off he goes to watch CSPAN of all things. They won't let him watch CSPAN in the fruitcake lounge because they'd rather watch Will and Grace.

Actually, it's not his fault, now that I'm thinking more clearly. It's the medication that is neutering him. So either he takes the medication and is able to maintain some sanity, or he doesn't take the medication and I'm able to maintain some sanity. Well fuck.

Oooh, be right back, I'm gonna go seduce the washing machine, it's hitting the spin cycle...
 
Sorry KM, I know how you feel and my honey is home every night.
 
Want to join the new club? I think I'll call it the Angry Women of Lit. Only requirement to join is to have some man to bitch and moan about. Wait, maybe the complaint could be that you DON'T have a man to bitch and moan about. Hmmmm... maybe we should keep it simple and you just need to be an angry woman. How 'bout it?
 
Re: I could just cry...

KillerMuffin said:
Do I get laid? Oh no, of course not. Never mind that I'm climbing the walls here.
Click to expand...

Hey darlin! Anytime you need my help let me know. Haven't seen you in the chat room in ages. Just call on me anytime you want. Might even let you tie me to your roll bar. HMMMMMMMMMMMMM...is my medical insurance paid up??
 
My guy's not even in the country...left 2 days ago. I feel your pain, trust me.

Personally, as long as he gets well, I'd be a nun for a while, but that wouldn't make it any easier. I'd be um...frustrated...too. Hang in there. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I guess that's not the only body part that grows fonder. :)
 
A man goes to the doctor...

The doctor asks him what is wrong.

The guys tells the doctor that every time he passes wind it sounds like a car horn.

The doctor is a little perplexed and so asks for some additional information.
“Does it sound like a domestic or a foreign car?” the doctor asked.

The guy said, “Well it sounds like a foreign one to me and my wife says it sounds Japanese.”

The doctor tapped his pen against his desk, thinking about this unusual complaint the man was describing.

The doctor suddenly stopped tapping.

“Just one last question to hopefully confirm my diagnosis,” the doctor said thoughtfully, “If you don’t mind talking about your drinking habits?”

“No problem Doc, what ever you have to ask, then just ask me!” the guy answered.

“Could you tell me what is your favourite drink and does your problem occur more after you have been drinking?”

“Yes it is always worse after I have been drinking all night.” The man admitted, “and I drink that French stuff Absinthe!”

“It is just as I suspected!” the doctor exclaimed, “ you are suffering a common compliant, Absinthe makes the farts crow Honda!”


EZ http://cwm.ragesofsanity.com/s/cwm2/sleep.gif
 
Re: A man goes to the doctor...

Ezzy said:

“It is just as I suspected!” the doctor exclaimed, “ you are suffering a common compliant, Absinthe makes the farts crow Honda!”
Click to expand...
Ohhhhhh, that was BAD. Now I know why the board is so quiet at this time of night! ;)
 
You know, Cheyenne, if we let Ez join, we would have to keep him nekkid to avoid that confusion.
 
Can I join the Angry Women of Lit.? Hubby has been in Saudi since September and I'm climbing the walls...Then to help matters the fool starts emailing me, telling me what he is going to do when he gets back. Doesn't he have a clue? I guess when i rape the mailman i can blame it on him.
 
Oh oh... brazen, that may have been a mistake. That bit about the mailman. You do realize the men around here, well some of them, keep various delivery uniforms in their trunks for just such situations. Make sure of who it is.
I seem to remember something about the UPS man.....
 
putting on my UPS guys outfit and strolling around the neighborhood.....

I have lots and lots of uniforms I can borrow? Would that help..........

Sorry KM, no fun for you. :(
 
LOL @ Muffin. Hey, how was the washing machine? And when you're done with the spin cycle then the tumble dryer has a little loving for you too *laughs*.
 
HERBS.........DON'T SMOKE IT BUT USE IT

Been there, done that, got the coffee mug KM. I mentioned in a past post of my Mexican ex and how she caused me to lose my job. Well, despite all of that, I was growing hornier than a teen-ager on prom night. Then last week, my ex-girlfriend/ex-coworker (the one whom my Mex ex wanted me to refrain from talking to while we were dating) decided to get together and spend the day together before she goes to work. Well, after a heathy lunch, we decided to go for dessert at a nearby motel. What can I say, I went from a sexy Mexican woman with one kid and lots of morals back to a woman almost half my age and addicted to the sex that we have.
Now, for your delimma.......Might I suggest yohimbe bark. It is an African herb that was around long before the marketing of Viagra. And it's alot cheaper. It is sold at any GNC and health food store. Twinlab makes Yohimbe Fuel and Male Fuel (same things). I have heard that this stuff could make a corpse get an erection. But I never went to a funeral home to try it on a dead guy. So take a shot in the dark without pissing in the wind. That might help your Muffin become that Stud again.
 
That would be wonderful Guy, but the problem is that he has PTSD and current medical research states that there are two specific pyschotropic (if that's the right word) drugs that are bad for people with PTSD, particularly severe cases like his. Caffeine and yohimbe. They took away his bodybuilding supplements and decaffinated his coffee. He is pissed. I imagine he'll go back to it when he gets out, if he can get past the fact that he's on 9 different medications right now, four of which are specifically designed to alter the chemistry of his brain. Right now even takin tylenol scares the dickens out of him, you never know whats going on if you're a walking pharmacy. *sigh*

He did tell me that he can get it up and does so on occasion. It remains to be seen if he can actually do so later on. Perhaps they'll change his medication again, but they once they find the right "cocktail" for him, will they? It's not like his disorder will ever go away.

Thank you though, the advice is appreciated. :)
 
YOU HAVE MY DEEPEST SYMPATHY, KM

I am very sorry to hear of SM's medical delimma. Please feel free to call me if you need to be de-hornitized. Afterall, what are friends for? Right?

All seriousiness, I do sympathize with you Killer. I wish you two the best.
 
Re: I could just cry...

KillerMuffin said:
Do I get laid? Oh no, of course not. Never mind that I'm climbing the walls here.

Oooh, be right back, I'm gonna go seduce the washing machine, it's hitting the spin cycle...
Click to expand...

Tough love, muff love

You do realize that a dryer has a good motion too

So sorry babe
 
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