Holidays, Holy and Otherwise

[CopyCarver]

Happy Easter
Happy Passover
and Festive Festivus

to all!

(OK, I'm early with the first and late with the second, but--as George Costanza taught us--Festivus can be celebrated any ol' time.)

 

[snooper]

Happy Easter ...

If you want to celebrate a man being executed in a particularly sadistic way when he had not murdered, raped or robbed anyone, or so the legend goes.

... Happy Passover ...

If you want to celebrate a nasty deity wreaking havoc culminating in mass murder to achieve the freeing of a number of slaves, or so the legend goes, which for an omnipotent deity could have been achieved much more gently by creating a pile of gold and buying them.

... Festive Festivus ... Festivus can be celebrated any ol' time.)

December 23rd is what Jerry Stiller invented, or so the legend goes, if a fictional character can be said to invent anything.


I think a quote from Dylan Thomas is apposite here:
"and all the bells of all the tills of all the town shall ring to celebrate ..."

 

[CopyCarver]

All of which is a problem only if you believe that the deity and events in question are anything more than myth. Many people do. I personally am celebrating a good excuse to consume mass quantities of lamb. Different strokes for different folks, all of whom, I hope, have a good day.

 

[RogueLurker]

All of which is a problem only if you believe that the deity and events in question are anything more than myth. Many people do. I personally am celebrating a good excuse to consume mass quantities of lamb. Different strokes for different folks, all of whom, I hope, have a good day.

Happy Whatever You Want to Call It. I'm with CC - this is a wonderful weekend to consume mass quantities of lamb - rack of lamb to be exact. I'll save you some mint sauce.

Enjoy the holidays, all!

 

[drksideofthemoon]

If you want to celebrate a man being executed in a particularly sadistic way when he had not murdered, raped or robbed anyone, or so the legend goes.

You're not celebrating his death. You are celebrating his resurrection or so the legend goes.

Agnus Dei,
qui tollis peccata mundi,
miserere nobis.

Agnus Dei,
qui tollis peccata mundi,
miserere nobis.

Agnus Dei,
qui tollis peccata mundi,
dona nobis pacem.

 

[Kev H]

All of which is a problem only if you believe that the deity and events in question are anything more than myth. Many people do. I personally am celebrating a good excuse to consume mass quantities of lamb. Different strokes for different folks, all of whom, I hope, have a good day.

Wonderfully, refreshingly tolerant. I also wish everyone their own fun/worship/whatever-they-call-it-these-days; personally, I will write (soon after I stop procrastinating) and do some gaming. Might even get crazy and make an extra cup of passionfruit tea.

 

[snooper]

H... weekend to consume mass quantities of lamb - rack of lamb to be exact. I'll save you some mint sauce. ...

Now this is getting really serious. Anyone who puts mint sauce on rack of lamb deserves to be shot at dawn every day for a week, at the very least.

Rack of lamb should be roasted slowly with rosemary as its seasoning, as every glutton knows.

 

[starrkers]

With all the chocolate here (well, before BIL's bloody dog stole a whole slew of it), the mere talk of rack of lamb is torture.

 

[CopyCarver]

With all the chocolate here (well, before BIL's bloody dog stole a whole slew of it), the mere talk of rack of lamb is torture.

Ah, but now it's Dyngus Day--time to supplement a couple pounds of chocolate with Polish ham and kielbasa, hard-cooked eggs, and a few quarts of Czech beer. Bon appetit

 

[bluebell]

A common cock-up.

Ah, but now it's Dyngus Day--time to supplement a couple pounds of chocolate with Polish ham and kielbasa, hard-cooked eggs, and a few quarts of Czech beer. Bon appetit

Oh, so that's what my downstairs neighbors are cooking.
And all this time I thought they were smoking pot...

 

[CopyCarver]

Oh, so that's what my downstairs neighbors are cooking.
And all this time I thought they were smoking pot...

Crossing fingers and hoping they don't get confused. Sweet-and-souring the pot and smoking the red cabbage generally doesn't work well.

 

[bluebell]

Dyngus and Ding-Bats

Crossing fingers and hoping they don't get confused. Sweet-and-souring the pot and smoking the red cabbage generally doesn't work well.

Heh. And you're experienced with this, are you?

I don't think they're picky. They'd probably sweet, sour, and smoke my underwear if I let them.
Then the cabbage.
Then they'd probably demand brownies. With nuts.
Bastards.

 

[CopyCarver]

Heh. And you're experienced with this, are you?

I don't think they're picky. They'd probably sweet, sour, and smoke my underwear if I let them.
Then the cabbage.
Then they'd probably demand brownies. With nuts.
Bastards.

Never tried cabbage but I once smoked a "Free" brand cigarette, made from dried lettuce leaves. The damned things weren't free, they weren't cigarettes, and they tasted like the fertilizer that speeded the lettuce growth.

 

[bluebell]

Neither this nor that

Never tried cabbage but I once smoked a "Free" brand cigarette, made from dried lettuce leaves. The damned things weren't free, they weren't cigarettes, and they tasted like the fertilizer that speeded the lettuce growth.

Hmm. Somehow my friend Amanda's baked goods all seem to turn out tasting like that as well...which is both good and bad.
Because, well, for one, they aren't cigarettes (good), but as baked goods they probably shouldn't taste like anything related to either cigarettes or fertilizer (bad).

So what holiday is it now, CC?
I must admit to having nothing particularly holiday-ish on my calendar, but perhaps it's a calendar that breaks free from the remplissage of all those other needlessly wordy calendars.
Eh?

 

[CopyCarver]

Hmm. Somehow my friend Amanda's baked goods all seem to turn out tasting like that as well...which is both good and bad.
Because, well, for one, they aren't cigarettes (good), but as baked goods they probably shouldn't taste like anything related to either cigarettes or fertilizer (bad).

So what holiday is it now, CC?
I must admit to having nothing particularly holiday-ish on my calendar, but perhaps it's a calendar that breaks free from the remplissage of all those other needlessly wordy calendars.
Eh?

Believe it or not, it's snow day in April around here. That doesn't do much for me but the kids would probably have relished it if they weren't aware that they already have a half dozen days to make up before they escape for the summer. They way the weather has been going backwards, there may not be any summer for them to escape to.

(patting myself on the back for dangling participle)

 

[snooper]

... So what holiday is it now, CC? ...

Covered as he is with precipitation, CC forgot to mention that today is your Unbirthday.

 

[bluebell]

Wow, what a weird post this is. Jam on my nose.

Covered as he is with precipitation, CC forgot to mention that today is your Unbirthday.

It IS?!?
How could I not know? *sobbing*
Now I need chocolate. For Unbirthdays and sobbing.

Wait a second...does that mean it's your Unbirthday too, Snooper?
Should I be baking? I make fabulous chocolate chip cookies.

(And by the by, I do so enjoy the image of CC covered with precipitation. It's very...Peanuts.)

 

[CopyCarver]

(And by the by, I do so enjoy the image of CC covered with precipitation. It's very...Peanuts.)

Precipitation cover makes great camo. When the IRS, evangelists, or my ex wife come looking for me, I just shove a carrot up my nose and pretend I'm a snowman until they go away.

 

[bluebell]

Precipinoseation

(And by the by, I do so enjoy the image of CC covered with precipitation. It's very...Peanuts.)

Precipitation cover makes great camo. When the IRS, evangelists, or my ex wife come looking for me, I just shove a carrot up my nose and pretend I'm a snowman until they go away.

Wow.
Two great images battling for the stage. I don't know which to choose.
Perhaps I will simulate an American Idol-like competition in my head.

I would try that carrot thing for when the Jehovah's Witnesses come, but since I'm inside and they're outside and I technically don't have to open the door, I'd just be nosing a needless carrot.

 

[snooper]

... Wait a second...does that mean it's your Unbirthday too, Snooper?
Should I be baking? I make fabulous chocolate chip cookies. ...

DAMN (pardon my language). I wish I had seen this two days ago. Unfortunately <sob> today 14th April is not my unbirthday <sob> so i can't come to your unbirthday party <sob> <sob> <sob>.

 

[snooper]

... I'd just be nosing a needless carrot.

Watch out; PERV (People for the Ethical treatment of Root Vegetables) will be firebombing your house before you know it. Jehovah won't be too pleased either, and He's got Witnesses to your atrocities.

 

[bluebell]

I do tend to ramble on sometimes.

DAMN (pardon my language). I wish I had seen this two days ago. Unfortunately <sob> today 14th April is not my unbirthday <sob> so i can't come to your unbirthday party <sob> <sob> <sob>.

Don't cry, lambkins. <hands you a hanky>
Even though it wasn't technically your Unbirthday, I will claim my Ultimate Unbirthday Powers and say that we shall have a party anyway.
The primary uninvited persons will be the American government, Kirk Cameron, and my downstairs neighbors.

So we'll plan for when it's convenient, and maybe CC would like to come as well. As long as he can abandon the carrot, avoid the storming crowds of PERVs, and bring something good to eat along with him.
But not lettuce cigarettes or Dyngus Day fare.
Something normal. Like mandarin oranges.

Watch out; PERV (People for the Ethical treatment of Root Vegetables) will be firebombing your house before you know it. Jehovah won't be too pleased either, and He's got Witnesses to your atrocities.

<sniggle>
Eh, I'm not worried about the Witnesses. I mean, they're probably a little bitter and somewhat easily swayed since only a certain number of them are going to heaven anyhow.
What's the measure of Unbirthday cake to a possible eternity in heaven?



I think all that was funnier in my head. Damn.

 

[snooper]

... What's the measure of Unbirthday cake to a possible eternity in heaven? ...

Have you ever thought how boring an eternity in heaven will be, especially after the first million years or so?

 

[CopyCarver]

Have you ever thought how boring an eternity in heaven will be, especially after the first million years or so?

Worse yet, we'd need to put up with those incessant harp recitals!
Note to angels: never play music on an implement better suited to slicing cheese

 

[snooper]

Worse yet, we'd need to put up with those incessant harp recitals!
Note to angels: never play music on an implement better suited to slicing cheese

Just be glad you don't live in Scotland - an eternity of bagpipe "heaven" ...