help!

[SCblondetiger]

ok so I've been wanting to be with another girl for awhile...and my friend and I were talking about it a few weeks ago and so... yea today we made out in a hot tub and then we went back to our apts and back to our rooms to take showers and I get out of mine and she ims me and asks me if I want to take it further than the hot tub and I asked what and she's like i need you so I go to her room and she standing there in a towel and we kissed more and more happened.. I liked it but it was no different than giving head to a guy as far as my feelings towards it... so now I'm just as confused as I was... I guess help me figure out what I am..am I straight? amI bi sexual?

 

[emap]

Well your lucky.

Besides that, I don't feel different about eating a woman or sucking on a guy, I do however love both So you have to ask yourself, do you enjoy sucking dick or is it just something you do as foreplay? If it's just something you do, well I'd have to say your an uncaring bisexual, in the fact that you can go both ways without any problems.

Of course can't really say for sure until you get eaten, if you love her tongue way more than a dick, your lesbian, if you love them the same, your bi, if you just want dick, your straight with bi tendencies.

Ever notice how there are so many labels for your sexual preferences?

 

[mystic_maiden32]

Well your lucky.

Besides that, I don't feel different about eating a woman or sucking on a guy, I do however love both So you have to ask yourself, do you enjoy sucking dick or is it just something you do as foreplay? If it's just something you do, well I'd have to say your an uncaring bisexual, in the fact that you can go both ways without any problems.

Of course can't really say for sure until you get eaten, if you love her tongue way more than a dick, your lesbian, if you love them the same, your bi, if you just want dick, your straight with bi tendencies.

Ever notice how there are so many labels for your sexual preferences?

well said, and I ask myself the same question!

 

[Etoile]

emap's description was kind of oversimplified, but generally along the right lines.

First off, I would say that you are probably not lesbian, but you already knew that.

I'd say right now you might be bicurious. You might want to check out some bisexual websites. There's also a great article from HRC called Am I Bisexual? It's short but informative, with leads to more information.

 

[SCblondetiger]

thanks.. that's kinda helping

I'm thinking about talking to her tommorrow about this...making sure she's ok with it and all and if she wants to do stuff to me or wants me to do it to her again *weg*

 

[anne27]

Congrats! And welcome to the wonderful world of bisexuality! Some of us actually enjoy being here and the weather is always nice and hot .
I'm pretty recent to this world, too. Sometimes it's a bit confusing, but the benefits are pretty damned cool! Enjoy yourself and don't be so intent on a label yet!

 

[Angel]

Honestly, you're the only person who can label yourself.

I strongly prefer cock, but I am most definitely bisexual, and not bicurious. You just can't generalize, sorry.

 

[DarkLadyOfDeath]

Why the need to label? If it's to understand better peachy keen... but don't label yourself to feel accepted. not that it is being implied but just be yourself and who you are. ::nod nod::

 

[emap]

I'm confused here, what's wrong with simple? Life is simple, buying a car is simple, or was. Most everything is simple, except I guess being different, if your different your supposed to have labels. I don't have labels, I have one, I'm me. My guy is just, well, him.

I don't get why everyone has to have a label, I can understand wanting to give people a sign, but a label, forget it. I mean think about it this way, is an airline pilot just an airline pilot? Is a gay man just a gay man? Is a lesbian just a lesbian? Is a dominate person just a dominate person? I mean they all do other things with their time, maybe they are a father as well, or a mother, maybe they are a VP of whatever in a big corporation, maybe they are the garbage man or woman, maybe they are Colonels in the military.

I said those labels to not have to explain things out for several paragraphs. Please don't make me explain what I would have said instead of bisexual or the rest.

 

[SCblondetiger]

part of me feels like I need a label. and with a label it's like I can understand myself and it aids in trying to figure out this confusion that I'm in right now...

It scares me to say that I'm bisexual.. otherwise I would say it....

I think my parents know to an extent, I mean afterall for the past 2 years they've been convinced that I'm a lesbian cause I don't talk about guys that I've dated...

 

[John Doe]

part of me feels like I need a label. and with a label it's like I can understand myself and it aids in trying to figure out this confusion that I'm in right now...

It scares me to say that I'm bisexual.. otherwise I would say it....

I think my parents know to an extent, I mean afterall for the past 2 years they've been convinced that I'm a lesbian cause I don't talk about guys that I've dated...

IMO the most important thing right now is to approach this positively. If you go into it thinking it'll be a big, life-changing, possibly traumatic ordeal, then for all intents and purposes it probably will be. A self-fulfilling prophecy sort of thing.

Now, that being said, you should concentrate on what these feelings mean to you. Right now you need to process this for your own benefit. There will be plenty of time to worry about your parents and whoever, later on.

I hesitate to be too specific without knowing more about you, but I suggest exploring why the possibility that you're bisexual frightens you so much. Ultimately all fear is derived from fear of the unknown. Once you explore, then it is known and the proverbial darkness loses its power over you.

The thing is, sexuality is not so much three compartments as it is a gradual scale. Most 'sexperts' agree that, barring the influence of a restrictive religion or overbearing parents, that most people are bisexual to a greater or lesser degree, whether they know it or not. All the social confusion comes up because people are coming to grips with thier sexuality and what it means to them, so the human mind invariably seeks to label. It's natural, but it can also hinder reason.

So, what I feel you should ask yourself is, 'how important to me is picking a label?' Keep in mind that you don't need to precisely define who you are, you just are. You exist and you breathe, think, feel, act, you live without having to constantly ask yourself 'Who am I?' That's a silly question anyway, because the answer should be obvious before it's ever asked.

I suggest asking people who have had similar experiences to explain how they dealt with it and came to be content with thier sexuality (which is merely a part of the whole you). Relating to the experiences of others may help you decide how to approach this on a constructive level.

WHEW! I started this post with the intent of tapping out a couple short paragraphs, but instead I practically wrote an essay on Existentialism.



In summary, for the time being I recommend focusing on you, what you think and feel. You can worry about others later. After all, thier thoughts, feelings and opinions are their own responsibility.

 

[Angel]

Labels are there mostly so that you can describe what you're feeling in conversation, IMHO.

 

[John Doe]

Labels are there mostly so that you can describe what you're feeling in conversation, IMHO.

Don't confuse us with the facts!

 

[Pookie]

emap's description was kind of oversimplified, but generally along the right lines.

First off, I would say that you are probably not lesbian, but you already knew that.

I'd say right now you might be bicurious. You might want to check out some bisexual websites. There's also a great article from HRC called Am I Bisexual? It's short but informative, with leads to more information.

Great links.

Also (directed at the thread in general), keep in mind that being bisexual doesn't necessarily mean that you're also "biamorous." Your attraction could very well just be a sexual one, without any emotional attraction/involvement. I would dare say that's the case with the majority of bisexuals.

 

[Etoile]

WHEW! I started this post with the intent of tapping out a couple short paragraphs, but instead I practically wrote an essay on Existentialism.

*applauds wildly for Stuponfucious*

That is a damn good answer. Very, very well said.

 

[SCblondetiger]

Thanks ya'll I read some of the links and when I am more awake I'm gonna read your essay Stuponfucious lol :lol

 

[replicant]

Thanks ya'll I read some of the links and when I am more awake I'm gonna read your essay Stuponfucious lol :lol

Congratulations on taking another step on your journey SCBT. It's nice to see that you're still walking a path you never imagined yourself ever attempting. A little more time and you'll begin to catch a glimpse of what and who you truly are. Later on.

 

[SCblondetiger]

Congratulations on taking another step on your journey SCBT. It's nice to see that you're still walking a path you never imagined yourself ever attempting. A little more time and you'll begin to catch a glimpse of what and who you truly are. Later on.

{{{{REP}}}}

how are ya??? yea thanks

 

[SwtETN]

{{SCBT}}

Life is many times a struggle between heart and mind....desire and logic. As you arrive at an answer to one question, another comes along.

I'm going to draw on a lil of your background that I know from CT. One of your biggest struggles right now is possibly a moral question because of your family background. The need to find a nice, neat label to describe yourself so there is no other explanation needed makes things easy but it isn't always that easy.

I've said all of that to say this.....Honey, think through the issue, read what you can, talk with the partner involved, talk to close friends that will listen objectively and with no alterior motive (you have done that by opening up the discussion here...congrats on that!!), DON'T be pushed farther than YOU feel comfortable. Always play safe.

In the end, you do only what you desire to do and feel good about doing. Don't worry about putting a label on yourself....that label is gonna change as life goes on anyway...lol. Whether you are in you are 20 or 50 (Yikes...That seems way to old for me...lol), the process is exactly the same. Good luck as you work through this. Take care, be safe, and have fun

ETN