Help! My character is boooooooooring....

[Amy Sweet]

I'm trying to figure out how to improve on my novel, "Imperfect Beauty" which I think has good points and bad points (If I could just sort out which is which) and it occurs to me that my main character is rather boring. I mean, in all of 50,000 words, this is pretty much *all* we know about her:

Nicole- 26, happy to be single, a painter, a few good friends, she has insecurities, she likes to paint fantasy scenes, esp. fairies, she’s in love with her best friend Zoë (but she doesn‘t realize it). She’s kinky and she’s non-judgmental.

Her friends are Glen, a gay man; Zoë an adventurous pink haired beauty; and Simone, a beautiful and stylish black woman.

Her mother constituently wants her to marry and have children, but she enjoys being single, sexually adventurous and pursuing her career as an artist.

How can I bring my character more alive? What do you do? Any suggestions?

General Notes: I think I'm going to get rid of Glen because it's becoming a cliche and I don't really know any gay men (I used to know 2 but that was so long ago). I do know someone like Simone though, and I think Zoe is also 'pretty but boring'- I have to keep her, but she needs punching up too- but first things first. I'm thinking of replacing Glen with another female character (still in the air)

Ok- if you want, you can read my 'novel'- it's posted, or you can just give general advice. but do you worste. I promise not to get hurt feelings. I'd pay for bad feedback right now, just to give me a bit of direction

 

[Amy Sweet]

Here is a link to my member page.


http://english.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=449195&page=submissions

 

[Colleen Thomas]

I'm trying to figure out how to improve on my novel, "Imperfect Beauty" which I think has good points and bad points (If I could just sort out which is which) and it occurs to me that my main character is rather boring. I mean, in all of 50,000 words, this is pretty much *all* we know about her:

Nicole- 26, happy to be single, a painter, a few good friends, she has insecurities, she likes to paint fantasy scenes, esp. fairies, she’s in love with her best friend Zoë (but she doesn‘t realize it). She’s kinky and she’s non-judgmental.

Her friends are Glen, a gay man; Zoë an adventurous pink haired beauty; and Simone, a beautiful and stylish black woman.

Her mother constituently wants her to marry and have children, but she enjoys being single, sexually adventurous and pursuing her career as an artist.

How can I bring my character more alive? What do you do? Any suggestions?

General Notes: I think I'm going to get rid of Glen because it's becoming a cliche and I don't really know any gay men (I used to know 2 but that was so long ago). I do know someone like Simone though, and I think Zoe is also 'pretty but boring'- I have to keep her, but she needs punching up too- but first things first. I'm thinking of replacing Glen with another female character (still in the air)

Ok- if you want, you can read my 'novel'- it's posted, or you can just give general advice. but do you worste. I promise not to get hurt feelings. I'd pay for bad feedback right now, just to give me a bit of direction

I suggest you go to the writer's advice thread and download Imp's character profile thingy. I never use anything like it, but it's very helpful if your characters need definition and you aren't sure wehre to go.

I would counsel against dropping Glen and replacing him with another female. An all female cast can work in short erotica, but in longer works, it's pretty unrealistic. Most people, both straight and gay, have freinds/aquaintances of the opposite gender.

Without reading I can't offer specifics, but n general, if the character is boring, you haven't really let us into her head. Perhaps you should work in a little of her back story and history, along with the impressions and things she took from them?

 

[TheEarl]

Just looked and seen that whilst this reply page was loading, Colly offered exactly the same advice I was going to. Imp's questionnaire thingy is very good for finding small details about your characters that you'd never thought of before.

The Earl

 

[Amy Sweet]

I suggest you go to the writer's advice thread and download Imp's character profile thingy. I never use anything like it, but it's very helpful if your characters need definition and you aren't sure wehre to go.

I would counsel against dropping Glen and replacing him with another female. An all female cast can work in short erotica, but in longer works, it's pretty unrealistic. Most people, both straight and gay, have freinds/aquaintances of the opposite gender.

Without reading I can't offer specifics, but n general, if the character is boring, you haven't really let us into her head. Perhaps you should work in a little of her back story and history, along with the impressions and things she took from them?

Oh there's a lot of that I did go into her head a lot, but it just seems awful rambling to me- maybe I need to just dig into some of these a little more or something. I'll go check that out and see if it helps Thanks.

 

[TheEarl]

Answer me these:

Where does Nicole work? Does she enjoy it? How did she get into that line of work? Is she looking to get promoted, find a new job?

How did she meet each of her friends? How did they become friends? What secrets do they share/keep from each other?

What's her family like? Brothers, Sisters, are her parents still alive? What kind of environment did she grow up in? Was she popular at school? How does that affect her outlook on life now?

What books does she read? What television programmes does she watch? Which political party does she support?

What does she carry in her pockets? What does she never leave the house without?


Now answer them for every major character. It's an idea-generator if nothing else.

The Earl

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I remember reading an interview with Canadian singer Anne Murray. She's had a wonderful career free of undue struggles or difficulties, a wonderful marriage, terrific kids, good health, &c. &c. How fucking dull. I hated her immediately.

We usually identify with characters because (a) they get to do things we'd like to do, (b) they deal with the same problems we deal with.

If Zoe isn't dealing with any problems herself, she's going to be dull. What makes people interesting is that they either have extraordinary problems, or they have extraordinary answers to the problems we all have.

How does Zoe justify sleeping around without feeling like a slut? If she doesn't worry about being called as a slut, what's she going to do with the one jerky guy who does tell his friends that she's a slut? Or are all her guys just perfect? How about she gets an STD? Or are all her guys certified Grade A Clean?

How does she feel about the fact that probably no one likes her paintings very much? Or is she fabulously successful there too?

You've got to decide whether you're writing a novel or an elaborate wish-fulfillment.

If nothing else, you can fall back on giving her cute gimmicks: she only wears purple underwear, she's got an agoraphobic dog, she's addicted to cinnamon, she was born without sweat glands, she lives on a houseboat, something like that. It's pretty feeble, but a lot of authors do it.

BTW, for an example of a movie about another famous guy who made it without any struggle, see if you can dig up a copy of "The Benny Goodman Story" starring Steve Allen. It's a laugh riot to see the writers struggle to come up with some conflict to keep the story going. (How's Lionel Hampton going to get his vibraphone off Catalina Island?!?) The climax is Benny asking his wife to marry him "with his clarinet".

 

[BlackShanglan]

One big piece of advice, and then a description of a method follow.

My big piece of advice is to work on her voice. Think about how she talks and how she would describe her life in her own words. Experiment and try it several different ways with different attitudes and word choices. Write a few paragraphs each time of Nicole telling her life story, imagining her perhaps saying it out loud to an interviewer, therapist, or new friend. This will help you to get a feel for her personality, and that will help you build outward to more details about what she does and how she lives.

On method, you made a good start, I think, in drawing up a list of what she does and what we know about her. Now expand that to do a few other things. I suggest brainstorming these ideas in roughly this order:

(1) Jot down everything you know about her personality, or that you invent while mulling this over. What are the central characteristics of Nicole? You've got some down already, like her adventurous nature and her interest in fantasy and painting. Keep going. Do a good long brainstorm and keep pushing once you think you are done. Get everything you can think of down.

(2) Think a bit more about why she does and feels those things, and ponder how they might be connected. Where does her love of fantasy come from - her desire for a more adventurous world? A rejection of something in her life that she doesn't like? An artist's tendency to see the world in symbol and imagination? The goal in this stage is to start testing the characteristics that you have assigned her and working out how they can be part of coherent personality in which the elements of character relate to each other in coherent ways and help to support and strengthen the impression of the character.

(3) Examine your character's traits and ask some key questions about audience appeal. What good qualities will appeal to the reader? Why will they like this person? What flaws will be endearing or moving? "Perfect" characters tend not to be very interesting, but a character who is a total wreck will also have problems. Think about how the audience will come to like the person you are presenting, especially in the beginning of the novel. Voice is a key part of this as well - think about how the character's voice will help express her personality.

(4) Plot a character arc and identify key tensions within the plot and with other characters. Decide how you want the character to develop in the course of the story and then select plot/tension elements that drive that development.

This last is the most vital step. Plot/tension and character need to be closely intertwined for the story to really work. Ideally, the plot challenges the character to fulfill his or her promise or overcome a major obstacle, and in the process reveals, expands, and illuminates the character. The character may succeed or fail in plot challenges, but what is important is that you present the character with challenges that are intimately related to who that character is. This helps to develop an interesting character as well making the action powerful and coherent.

An example: you've got a painter who is sexually adventurous and in love with her friend without realizing it. It seems likely that one of your goals for the story is for her to recognize her love for her friend. But what about her other aspects? Does she need to learn to balance sexual adventure and commitment, or do you want her to learn to take more risks and seize the day? What's the thing in the world that she wants or needs most? What's the biggest threat to her happiness? Bring those things into the action of the story, and you will have both better action and a more powerful and developed character. Know what she wants or needs out of life, and that will give her something to strive for.

You can also think about the outcome of her tension or conflict. There are four basic ways to go:

(1) Positive success. Character gets what s/he wants, and it's great. Traditional happy ending as in "Cinderella."

(2) Negative success. Character gets what s/he wants, but it turns out not so great. There are problems the character didn't forsee, the reward isn't the wonderful thing the character thought it would be, character realizes too late that s/he had the wrong goals. The ending of "Godfather III" is something like this; Michael lives and makes it in the incredibly cutthroat world of the mafia, but he dies alone having lost everything that should have been important to him.

(3) Positive failure. Character doesn't get what s/he thought s/he wanted, but the ending is happy anyway. Character gets something different and beter, or character learns, happily, that there are better goals to strive for. "Shrek" is a good example of a positive failure ending. Fiona doesn't get to be a princess, but she gets something better.

(4) Negative failure. Character fails in his/her objectives and loses everything as a result. For example, in "The Remains of the Day," the central character of the butler never overcomes his hesitancy and emotional isolation, with barren and wrenching results.

Once you know what your character's goals and ambitions are, you can move on to that sort of planning and come up with something that really brings out the character's personality and moves the reader through the plot with a purpose.

Shanglan

 

[BlackShanglan]

(Also, what Dr. M said. He's right on the money.)

 

[sweetnpetite]

Thanks, you guys have given me a lot to think about. And a few of those things I had condidered myself as well. For example- why not let her simply 'embrace' her 'sluttyness' rather than trying to pretend that she's all goodness and light? And why should she have no conflicting feelings about it- that, amoung other things as Doc said is more of a 'wish fulfilment' than a novel.

Upon consideration, I realized a few things- I really don't like her name so I gave her a new one. Also, I felt that I didn't really know her so I decided to explore that by 'rewriting' at least some of the story in second person so that I (as author and narrator) am looking *at* her rather than through her.

I've decided to develope her background a bit more- as well as to use a techniche I will refer to as 'zooming out'- in otherwords, giving more of a sence of place- focusing on the outward actions and settings which were somewhat neglected by her 'in my head' point of view.

Yes- conflict. I pinpointed my halfway point (which I think is not to awful up to then) and noticed that things just get good and good and good when I should have conflice *right there* instead of perfection. (Ah, it looks like it's gonna be perfection- exactly why it shouldn't be.

And doc's right- everybody can't love her and everybody can't love her work.

I also decided that she should be younger and not have graduated but left school before she finished, and decided that i should emphasise her lifestyle and choices, and flesh out the supporting characters, toss in more conflict, and more foils. for example, since she is *not* obsessed with shoes and shopping (all the typical chick-lit type obsessions) I'll give that to the glamourous friend and the gay friend for contrast. (Then i have to find an excuse for her to be friends with them- him I suppose because he's 'alternative' and her becuase she's a friend of his (or Zoe's for some reason.)

So anyway, there are my current booknotes- even though you didn't ask for them. Earl, good questions- you did give me a bit to think about. If anyone wants to read my 'second person' alternate begining here is a link to a thread it's posted on:
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=12912799#post12912799

The phone rang.

“So are you seeing anyone?”

“Well, hello to you to.”

The young woman who answered had long brown hair worn loose and
natural, and a curvy body hidden beneath her loose-fitting secondhand outfit that
looked quite a bit like it had jumped right out of a Stevie Nicks album cover. She
wore no make-up but had an open pretty face even without embellishment. Her
name was Jocelyn Morley and she was draping herself across a squishy soft
secondhand arm chair that she had reupholstered herself with an old yard sale
tapestry. The woman who’d sold her the tapestry probably wouldn’t have approved
of Jocelyn’s use of it, but Jocelyn liked that there was nothing quite like it
anywhere.