Have you ever been this desperate?

[cheerful_deviant]

MOSCOW (AFP) - A man in his 40s armed with a knife burst into a Moscow sex shop and threatened a clerk before making off with an life-size inflatable doll and some sexy lingerie.

The owner of the shop, located opposite Gorky park, estimated the value of the stolen goods at 300 euros (387 dollars).

A composite sketch was distributed to police and a search for the suspect was under way, RIA Novosti news agency said Thursday.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

All he wanted was the sexy lingerie.

He took the inflatable doll as a hostage.

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

I hope he put the knife away before he inflated the doll. One wrong move and POP!

 

[cheerful_deviant]

All he wanted was the sexy lingerie.

He took the inflatable doll as a hostage.

I thought it was so he could use the carpool lane during his escape?

 

[cheerful_deviant]

I hope he put the knife away before he inflated the doll. One wrong move and POP!

Do you think he remembered to steal the patch kit too?

 

[yui]

Do you think he remembered to steal the patch kit too?

Fix-a-Flat Sex Doll Repair Kit: 1595 Rubles.
The expression on the clerk's face: Priceless

 

[impressive]

Okay, I've never seen an inflatable sex doll "in the flesh," but I've always wondered how you could get any sort of friction going with something that light weight. Do they have, like, ballast -- or something?

 

[cheerful_deviant]

Okay, I've never seen an inflatable sex doll "in the flesh," but I've always wondered how you could get any sort of friction going with something that light weight. Do they have, like, ballast -- or something?

I believe they rely on electronic... um, stimulation.

"Batteries not included"

 

[Wicked-N-Erotic]

I needed a good laugh today and by George this did it....Thanks so much

Wicked

 

[LadyJeanne]

I suppose the old lotion in a plastic baggie tucked betwee the mattress and boxspring trick just gets old after a while, huh?

 

[The_Fool]

I suppose the old lotion in a plastic baggie tucked betwee the mattress and boxspring trick just gets old after a while, huh?

Wow....learn somthing new every day....taking notes

 

[impressive]

I suppose the old lotion in a plastic baggie tucked betwee the mattress and boxspring trick just gets old after a while, huh?

(I used that in my latest story. *grin*)

 

[dreampilot79]

I too hope he put the knife away...

Pictures a poor man.. mounted to a doll with a massive leak... kinda like letting go of a balloon before ya get it tied...

man mounted to balloon.... flying around the room....


NOT a pretty picture!!!!!.... just hope he closed all the windows!!!!!

 

[cantdog]

I've seen the pages and pages of beautiful, clever, and high-tech toys, you guys. Why on earth must a man settle for some thirty-nine-cent improvisation? Old trick or no? Ernest Beam swore the very best substitute he ever had was a Pacific giant clam, Tridacna sp.

Trig them so they can't quite shut, prop them up and Bob's your uncle. The muscles move, the entire internal structure is slick and slimy surfaces...

Ah, nature.

 

[rgraham666]

I've seen the pages and pages of beautiful, clever, and high-tech toys, you guys. Why on earth must a man settle for some thirty-nine-cent improvisation? Old trick or no? Ernest Beam swore the very best substitute he ever had was a Pacific giant clam, Tridacna sp.

Trig them so they can't quite shut, prop them up and Bob's your uncle. The muscles move, the entire internal structure is slick and slimy surfaces...

Ah, nature.

There's an image that's going to stay in my mind. Whether I want it to or not.

 

[Kirk482002]

I've seen the pages and pages of beautiful, clever, and high-tech toys, you guys. Why on earth must a man settle for some thirty-nine-cent improvisation? Old trick or no? Ernest Beam swore the very best substitute he ever had was a Pacific giant clam, Tridacna sp.

Trig them so they can't quite shut, prop them up and Bob's your uncle. The muscles move, the entire internal structure is slick and slimy surfaces...

Ah, nature.

any cheap hotels out there?

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

. . . Ernest Beam swore the very best substitute he ever had was a Pacific giant clam, Tridacna sp. . . .

Come back in a dozen years, and the mollusk might be irritated enough to offer you a valuable pearl not to repeat the performance.

 

[rgraham666]

Come back in a dozen years, and the mollusk might be irritated enough to offer you a valuable pearl not to repeat the performance.

And if you string along enough of them, you'll have enough pearls to impress the real thing.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

And if you string along enough of them, you'll have enough pearls to impress the real thing.

I'm not up on mollusk sexes, but you just might wind up as an actual Mother of Pearl

 

[ElizabethWest]

Lmao!

 

[Guest]

MOSCOW (AFP) - A man in his 40s armed with a knife burst into a Moscow sex shop and threatened a clerk before making off with an life-size inflatable doll and some sexy lingerie.

The owner of the shop, located opposite Gorky park, estimated the value of the stolen goods at 300 euros (387 dollars).

A composite sketch was distributed to police and a search for the suspect was under way, RIA Novosti news agency said Thursday.

i appologize for any inconvienence i may have caused. it certainly didnt dawn on me that i would be mistaken for a man...i just needed a fourth for bridge.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Whatever you do, be careful that it does not reflect poorly upon your intelligence.

http://gloriabrame.typepad.com/inside_the_mind_of_gloria/images/ebaynotice_1.jpg​

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I've seen the pages and pages of beautiful, clever, and high-tech toys, you guys. Why on earth must a man settle for some thirty-nine-cent improvisation? Old trick or no? Ernest Beam swore the very best substitute he ever had was a Pacific giant clam, Tridacna sp.

Trig them so they can't quite shut, prop them up and Bob's your uncle. The muscles move, the entire internal structure is slick and slimy surfaces...

Ah, nature.

Can't you see the guy bringing the clam into some Tiki bar to loosen her up? Him in a Hawaiian shirt, the clam with lipstick and a string of pearls, sitting at the bar with his arm around her drinking out of pineapples?

As for the Russian with the doll and the knife, I'll bet he's going to pop her at the moment he comes. It'll make him feel like such a he-man.

 

[Kirk482002]

Can't you see the guy bringing the clam into some Tiki bar to loosen her up? Him in a Hawaiian shirt, the clam with lipstick and a string of pearls, sitting at the bar with his arm around her drinking out of pineapples?

As for the Russian with the doll and the knife, I'll bet he's going to pop her at the moment he comes. It'll make him feel like such a he-man.

I can't decide betwwen booking a fight West or trucking over to the 'Eager Beaver' adult supply store.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

No, I don't think I've been that desperate.

Unless you consider robbing the remote control for batteries in the dead of the night as the rest of the family sleeps...

~lucky