Has anyone been raped.......and loved it

[whitemist]

Hi there....just wondering...has anyone else been raped and ended up ..

Loving it......played with and penetrated until you came over and over
are there any others out there

 

[Rolando2]

No, I never have been, but would love to be .

 

[missmia73]

I was, hated at the time..
But now I want to act it out more and more..Being controlled and forced to do sexual acts is very hot!!!

 

[gagginforit]

I can't imagine anyone would enjoy being actually raped. I'm sure fantasy rape is hot for some people, but there's a big difference between that and the real thing.

 

[whitemist]

No......you are so right....its not nice,at all at first
But ,as it went on....i began to respond.....and found it was amazing.....maybe its not right to ceel like that....but I am so turned on every time I think about it......

 

[jenna39]

No. My actual rape was horrible and has left emotional scars that still affect me over 20 years later. there was nothing good about it.

Rape fantasy however is a different matter. I can 'play' rape scenes and I find them incredible. I think it's a way for me to keep control when in reality it was taken away from me.

 

[Sonchyenne]

I'm with jenna39 on this one. I've been raped twice. When I think of either, I get furious. Memories of the first make my skin crawl. Rape play, however, is basically rough sex with role playing for me. Both my body and mind agree: lack of consent is a deal breaker.

 

[Eager2TRYRU]

I'm with jenna39 on this one. I've been raped twice. When I think of either, I get furious. Memories of the first make my skin crawl. Rape play, however, is basically rough sex with role playing for me. Both my body and mind agree: lack of consent is a deal breaker.

I have trouble getting my mind around this subject. The last six relationships I have had, five had been raped. It was almost enough to make me embarrassed to be male and, by being male, be associated by sharing a gender type with men who rape women if that makes any sense.

All but one of the women who had been raped wanted to have rough sex, role play where I was forcing them... and I personally found it difficult to participate in because of the pain I felt for them having been raped. In my mind, I didn't want to be associated with those men in any way, shape or form. Yes, I understand that there is a big difference between a real rape and role play, but for me, I don't know... I had and still have such anger directed to anyone who forcibly, against someone's will, has sexual contact with another person. I'll role play a wide variety of sexual activities, including "rough" sex, but there are lines that I just couldn't cross.

 

[HannahHills]

No. My actual rape was horrible and has left emotional scars that still affect me over 20 years later. there was nothing good about it.

Rape fantasy however is a different matter. I can 'play' rape scenes and I find them incredible. I think it's a way for me to keep control when in reality it was taken away from me.

I've been fantasizing about rape forever and ever. Still, at the end of the day, it's consensual, and it's about (hot) sex. Actual rape is about power, and stealing it from the victim to meet the attacker's selfish needs. I can't imagine that the reality would be anything but terrifying and scarring, and my heart goes out to true victims. And yet, I still can't get my mind off it.

 

[Aurantica]

I'm with jenna39 on this one. I've been raped twice. When I think of either, I get furious. Memories of the first make my skin crawl. Rape play, however, is basically rough sex with role playing for me. Both my body and mind agree: lack of consent is a deal breaker.

I agree. Rape is, by definition, sex without consent. I cannot imagine anyone coming to like being raped while it is happening. Rape roleplays are hot, the real deal is not.

 

[jenna39]

All but one of the women who had been raped wanted to have rough sex, role play where I was forcing them... and I personally found it difficult to participate in because of the pain I felt for them having been raped. In my mind, I didn't want to be associated with those men in any way, shape or form. Yes, I understand that there is a big difference between a real rape and role play, but for me, I don't know... I had and still have such anger directed to anyone who forcibly, against someone's will, has sexual contact with another person. I'll role play a wide variety of sexual activities, including "rough" sex, but there are lines that I just couldn't cross.

You have your lines and those should be respected, but I will tell you that for me (and god knows we're all different in our approach to sex and fantasy) I never ever once have compared my partners to the man who actually raped me. What I was doing with partners was something I honestly enjoyed, something that was for me and something that we both consented to. Rape fantasy is incredibly common among both men and women, both those who have been raped and not. It honestly has HELPED me in gaining control of how I express myself sexually. So while I commend you for not wanting to add to their pain, it's really quite possible that the fantasy is a way for them to gain back their control.

I've been fantasizing about rape forever and ever. Still, at the end of the day, it's consensual, and it's about (hot) sex. Actual rape is about power, and stealing it from the victim to meet the attacker's selfish needs. I can't imagine that the reality would be anything but terrifying and scarring, and my heart goes out to true victims. And yet, I still can't get my mind off it.

And I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Rape fantasy has been around since well. forever. how many romance novels are based on the man taking the woman against her will but she comes to love it/him. For the love of god we get that very scene in 'Gone With the Wind'. From the time we're old enough to start consuming media women are fed the basis of the rape fantasy. And then we're shamed into thinking it's wrong. So we hide it away as our dirty little secret and it shouldn't be.

 

[twister947]

Like Eager, I just can't go there. Just the word "rape" ignites an anger in me.

 

[Sonchyenne]

And again, that's valid: nobody, even a rape survivor, should pressure someone into a sexual activity that the person doesn't want to do. For some, it's just the inclusion of the word "rape" that's distressing, for others it's (also) the role play involved.

Meanwhile there are rape survivors who only crave this sort of play from trustworthy people, who may not necessarily be the partners who try to initiate it. :\

I have met one person who claims to have found her actual rape-in-progress arousing. She was reportedly treated as highly disturbed and delusional by psychological professionals and most friends she confided to, but it's entirely possible that some small percentage of people are wired to enjoy that level of encroachment. Otherwise, I got nothin' on that data point.

 

[BongoGal]

Both men and women can experience sexual arousal while being raped. They both may even be brought to orgasm during a rape. That does not in any way mean that they are "loving it". It is the human body's automatic response to physical stimulation. I compare it to tickling. Even if you hate being tickled, being tickled may make you laugh convulsively no matter how much you try not to. Just because you laughed does not mean that there was any enjoyment. The same goes for genital stimulation. Getting wet or getting an erection is simply what can happen if erogenous zones get stimulated.

 

[MKEguy]

Definitely love the idea of a rape fantasy. Want to work it out with a woman where I will take her by force at some point in her day. She could be loading her groceries into her van or hopping into the shower. But she would never know when and hopefully the anticipation would drive both of us nuts.

 

[Beth87]

Sexual arousal during rape is possible but that doesn't equal consent. Men can be raped by women because of this and women also be made to respond bodily. Sexual organs react the way they are supposed to regardless of whether you want them to or not.

Frankly anyone who says they suddenly, truly, enjoyed their rape is living in denial. I was abused for a prolonged period of time and over the years my abuser forced me to orgasm many times. That doesnt make it consensual or mean I liked what he did. He was a sick perverted man who deserved to be locked up.

When I turned 16 I started to want rough sex. I felt pretty worthless and I wanted to be treated that way but it was also one of the only ways I could experience orgasm.

Now I have a much healthier view of sex and for the most part, I've stopped blaming myself for what happened.

There are many things wrong in literature...more specifically romantic literature...if it can glamorise and romanticise rape and no-one bats an eyelid because, hey, she eventually consents. In real life No means no. When someone roleplays rape they've already had a discussion on boundaries etc (at least you would hope so)...the dominant doesn't "convince" their partner it is soo good.

 

[janeyruth]

Sexual arousal during rape is possible but that doesn't equal consent. Men can be raped by women because of this and women also be made to respond bodily. Sexual organs react the way they are supposed to regardless of whether you want them to or not.

Frankly anyone who says they suddenly, truly, enjoyed their rape is living in denial. I was abused for a prolonged period of time and over the years my abuser forced me to orgasm many times. That doesnt make it consensual or mean I liked what he did. He was a sick perverted man who deserved to be locked up.

When I turned 16 I started to want rough sex. I felt pretty worthless and I wanted to be treated that way but it was also one of the only ways I could experience orgasm.

Now I have a much healthier view of sex and for the most part, I've stopped blaming myself for what happened.

There are many things wrong in literature...more specifically romantic literature...if it can glamorise and romanticise rape and no-one bats an eyelid because, hey, she eventually consents. In real life No means no. When someone roleplays rape they've already had a discussion on boundaries etc (at least you would hope so)...the dominant doesn't "convince" their partner it is soo good.

Thank you, Beth. You are absolutely right...

 

[WastelandVoice]

A Male's Perspective.

I felt compelled to weigh in on this. I've had a few relationships with women who had been raped and I find one of two things happen:

They either shut off sexually (and emotionally) and don't want anything to do with sex, or, for lack of a better way of putting it, they kick the sexuality kicks into overdrive.

Shrug.

I'm not sure what the mechanism behind it is and we can talk about it forever but I'm not sure there's any real scientific reason behind it. Some people say that acting out the attack in a consensual way helps to give them power or control over it- I can understand that. Others say it's just reliving the trauma and not healthy- I understand that as well.

I think the important thing is undestanding yourself and your partners emotional health. I see nothing wrong with consenting adults doing whatever the hell they want to, be it rough sex, roleplay, etc.. so long as nobody gets hurt and nothing illegal is done.

But the "nobody gets hurt" part is tricky because we often think of the physical and not so much the emotional- especially when the hurt isn't something that is obvious or tangible.

I think it depends on the person. I really do. I read through this thread and others and I see a lot of women who are interested in rough sex and rape fantasies but I don't see many, if any, who are actually excited about the idea of being "Raped." I think what they're really talking about is a dominant and forceful sexual encounter- one that resembles a rape in all shapes and forms but is consenual. I'm not sure you can actually hope or want something that is, by its nature, something you DON'T want. There's a gray area there somewhere.

One of my exes had been molested by an uncle for a number of years as she was growing up and that came through in her sexual appetites. She was constantly looking for more extreme, more rough, more kinky play. At the time I hadn't done any of the things she wanted to do and I found it intimidating and a little scary to go through with but I did it because she wanted me to.

Now I find myself constantly drawn to the extreme, the rough, the kinky. I'm not sure I'd have ever gone there if it wasn't for her and I'm also not so sure that's a good thing. I know, part of me does at least, that my attraction to extreme sexual acts comes almost 100% from her and the experiences we had. I don't know if I'd have ended up here if it wasn't for her and again, not sure that's a good thing. I may not have been "meant" for this type of sex (whatever that means) and part of me wonders if my own interests and proclivities are the healthiest or most well-adjusted. I think I have my own issues to work through on that subject and, in a way, I almost feel as though I was "raped" in the sense that I was pushed toward doing things that, for the life of me, weren't even on my radar until she showed up. Not that I blame her and not that it's the same thing but I think you understand what I'm saying.

I do know that as a man who is interested and drawn toward the sexually extreme- I am completely different in the bedroom and out of it. No one ever suspects that I am drawn to the things I'm drawn to and it often comes as a surprise. But I think you can have different aspects of yourself and still be a whole person.

But I do think it depends on the person, I really do. Some survivors will be drawn to it- others will shy away from it and I don't know that one is better than the other. Being safe and smart is important above all else and I think most people with even a modicum of insight into themselves know their motivations and drives well enough to know if what they're doing is bad- even if they don't possess the power to stop themselves.

What comes next is anyone's guess, I'm afraid, but it's an interesting discussion on here nonetheless.

 

[BongoGal]

For what it is worth, some people in comas and those unconscious while under anesthesia can be sexually aroused to the point of orgasm if they have their genitals stimulated. No one would suggest that they 'loved it' or gave their consent. It is simply the body's natural response, and it's the same when people are awake.

 

[BongoGal]

deleted

 

[JayDeeCee]

Just to chime in: I'm a guy and while I've never participated in a rape roleplay, I actually find the idea quite arousing. However, the thought of real rape chills my blood and, as someone above also said, shames me a little as a man.

Perhaps knowing that your partner also finds the fantasy of rape exciting adds to the enjoyment, whereas a nonconsensual act would lack this element.

Rape is, of course, disgusting for many more reasons besides that, but maybe the mutual arousal (and consent) enhances the act.

 

[JD88]

You'll rarely hear of a man getting raped. If it was a woman he considers ugly with a bottle of chloroform , he'll repress and deny it. Even if he goes to the authorities and says "she raped me" they'll laugh in his face, or ask her what happened and she'll say he raped HER and then HE goes to jail.

Or if the woman is attractive and just a little psycho or whatever, unless the man is faithfully in a relationship he'll just be like "hey, all you had to do was ask" (actually had a friend this happened to).

Now my question, is blackmailing someone into having sex considered rape? And would the blackmailee be more... secretly indulgent about it than physical rape

 

[statton]

Rape

Reliving the rape, while being able to control the situation, is therapeutic. Freud's theory of recapitulation suggested people put themselves into bad situations over and over in an attempt to master the problem or control that which wasn't controllable. The role play allows the individual to relive the bad experience with someone she trusts, thus giving her control over that which was not controllable. If she is into it, its probably good.

 

[BongoGal]

Now my question, is blackmailing someone into having sex considered rape? And would the blackmailee be more... secretly indulgent about it than physical rape

Yes, it is considered rape. And all rape is 'physical rape'. Holding a gun at someone and forcing him or her to perform sexual acts that they don't want to perform is rape just as much as pointing a gun at a person's child at demanding sex from that person. And the same goes for threats to get someone fired from his or her job or thrown in jail. Coercing someone into having unwanted sex is rape even if the means of coercion may vary.

I'd say that if someone is raped by means of blackmail, he or she will be just as "secretly indulgent" as any other rape victim, assuming you are talking about a becoming physically aroused.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I love rough sex. Kicking and biting and cursing and fighting and even laughing, as we each try to get and maintain the upper hand-- that's a fantasy come true!

or being overpowered and forced,until you come like a banshee while swearing revenge... oooh whee!

Real rapes are nothing like that.