Handling 3PL POV..... *Help*!

[wornoutkeyboard]

I am currently writing a novel with a little bit of an "erotic" flair (you know...a good novel with even better juicy parts...lol).

It just so happens that as the story "barfed out" (as my stories do... I really have little reign over them in the first draft), it came out in 3PL (3rd person limited POV). I have NEVER written in 3PL before, but I really think it will work best for this book. It is a "who-done-it," "thriller" kinda plot line, so the 3PL POV makes it easier to "hide" the identity of the bad guy.

That said...

What the hell did I get myself into? This is harder than crap! (One might ask what the exact denisty of crap is...but we'll leave that for another time).

I am having a really hard time describing the actions and motivations of others without sounding weak.

eg-

"John appeared anxious, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other."

Now, to me...saying "john appeared" seems weak..and unconvincing. But, since it is 3PL and not 3PO, how can I really tell the reader with conviction how another character is feeling since the perspective is limited to the protagonist?

I am also having a hard time "transitioning" from scene to scene. Normally, I would just stop at a good point and then pick up the next scene in the omniciant view of another character. However, I can't do that anymore. So, how do I transition? I mean... do I need to explain the passage of time...or should I just jump to it and hit the next scene in media res, as I would normally do?

I know these questions must seem sophomoric, but I really have almost no experience with 3PL and really feel out of my element.

Anyone out there use 3PL on a regular basis and have some pointers?

I am really starting to feel so *grrrr* about the whole damn thing that I am even resorting to onomatopoeia.

I am feeling the icy flesh of writer's block wraping around my throat right now.....

~WOK

 

[Seattle Zack]

One exercise Lawrence Block suggests is switching to 1st person when it becomes difficult then "translating" it in the rewrite.

As he says at the end of the article, that's how he ended up with some of his best 1st person POV books -- kept telling himself he'd fix it later.

What's wrong with "Anxiously, John's eyes darted from one corner of the room to the other." You avoid that dreaded passive voice.

But if John's not the main character, "John's eyes darted from one corner of the room to the other."

He's obviously anxious -- show don't tell, remember -- so let the character's actions carry their emotional burden.

No problem with jumping from scene to scene and then smoothing it out later -- some transitions work amazingly well when you don't plan them. Give The Reader some credit, he can usually keep up unless the transition is too jarring.

Just keep writing. Finish the damn thing (the sign tacked to my bulletin board). 3PL is very tough for me, so I do understand your difficulty.

--Zack

 

[Medieval-Man]

Ahh the joys of 3PL... instead of 3PO, I'm more of a 3PO person, becauseI write under the idea of cinema, but, all in all, 3PL is not so hard, you answered the flaw in the quote through it.

"John appreared" yes appeared is limited, but you said that it seemed weak, "John felt/seemed/was/resonated" all work pretty well, the last one if John is not the one guy you get access too mentally.

3PL allows you mentalities of one character only, right? I always figuerd 3PL as a camera hovering over one guysd head, with glimpses inside, and 3PO as a camera with free movement, best suiting the plot of course.

Good luck, this is a pain in the ass, I know.
Comfortingly, as you do something I refuse based on my stubborness, and your advanced ability,
-Medi-

 

[Uther_Pendragon]

Well, unlike some of the other people answering, my
POV style is 3rd-person limited. So, what do you do. In
the first place, there is more than one style which falls
under that description. I tend to like the one whch is
really and truly limited. As somebody suggested, it's
almost 1st-person. Instead of "I saw/thought/did," it's
"John saw/thought/did."
So, if it's only what John perceives, how do you convey
Bill is nervous? Either "Bill's eyes were travelling all
over the room and sweat glistened on his face" or "suddenly,
John guessed that Bill was fearful. WTH do you need a
passive voice? If John perceives, then report his
perception. Transition, likewise. Does John move, or does
time simply pass. If John moves, then report his motion
(quie briefly) "When Johen got to the airport, he ...." If
time, then "The next day, ...."

 

[snooper]

I am, to a large extent, with Uther. Itisn't difficult if you remember the other name for 3rd "fly on the wall". You are an intelligent fly, with or without thought-reading capacity, and you can report everything the fly sees or hears. You can switch scenes by switching from fly to fly ad lib.

Where I differ from most of the US writers is my sympathy for the passive voice. What is supposed to be wrong with it? If it were such a crime to write passive sentences, then the voice would not exist, just as we really have no plufuture tense because we don't need it.

 

[Icingsugar]

I do believe that you actually could adress the matter at hand with words and phrases more common in a 3PO setup. If you want to say "John was anxiuos, his eyes darted..." go right ahead. But you'll have to tread a thin line of mixing a third person perspective observation and the intepretations of the focus character. To achieve this, remind the readers now and then that it is just that you are doing. It has to be established very early on that any value or intepretations applied to the observations have to be taken with a grain of salt.

I often write in 3PL, but I've come to realise that rules are for bending, and that little slip away from the guidelines can be pretty effective to set a personal tone.

"Eddie was particulary grumpy tonight. Lisa decided to stay the hell away. Within Eddies spitting range was not a place to be on a day like this. Unless one wore a rain coat."

Eddies grumpyness is Lisas intepreatation of his behaviour, and could later in the story be proved wrong. And should now and then, to keep the reader on his toes.

Or just turn off your head, write the damn thing as it sounds in your head, and see if it worked. That's what editing is for.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Wok,

My attempts to use a limited POV were just aweful. From what I have seen and tried you are limited to explaining motivation, feeling and thought prossess in others with seemed, appeared, was apparently etc.

It isn't neccessarily weak, but it appears to me you are severely lmited in how you approach using a limited POV. My only suggetion would be to use more adjectives and spend more words on why someone seemed or appeared some way. Think of it as a movie set.

"John appeared anxious, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other."

How would they do this if John was a suspect being interrogated on Hill Street Blues? maybe a dab of water on his brow for some sweat, nervously taping his fingers on the table, labored breathing. If you paint your scenes and then look at them like you would from a directors standpoint in a movie or show you might see little things you could throw in that help appeared seem less weak.

-Colly

 

[Guest]

WOK, I have also had little experience in writing 3PL. I have written one short story that way, (I even included the POV of a dog!) it kind of worked, but I don't think I entirely managed to keep 3PO out of it. I used to the kind of approach that Ice suggested; I bent the rules slightly.

However, I do agree with Uther, I prefer to read something where the POV is really and truly limited to the particular character being focused upon in that scene. One way to get across the actions and appearance of other characters is to describe the effect they are having on the character who's head you are inside. How does he/she interpret what they are doing? For example: "Dean stood close to Louise, his mouth almost touched her face as he spoke; she could smell the sickly scent of whiskey on his breath." I said that in my story instead of saying "Dean appeared to be drunk." It can be more long-winded way of doing it, but you do retain 3PL that way, and it paints a more intense picture for the reader.

On the question of transition, just jump straight into the next scene, but always try to keep each chapter from the POV of one person, don't switch mid-chapter. The reader will follow what you're doing, if you start the new chapter with the name, or even location or nuance of the character, from who's POV you are speaking from.

I've read, and enjoyed, many books written in 3PL, and one way I noticed that the author really focuses on one particular character is how they refer to the other characters. One book was about a family going on a camping trip (Dark Mountain/Tread Softly, by Richard Laymon/Richard Kelly resp.) Each character had different names, or nicknames for each other. For example when the POV was that of the daughter, she thought of the Father as 'Dad'. But, when it was from the POV of the wife she thought of him as 'Stuart'. Again, when it was from the POV of a family friend he had a nickname for the Father of the family, and called him 'Sarge' (they'd served in Vietnam together).

Also, when switching POVs, change the language you use. In this particular book, when he wrote it from the POV of the daughter he used less complicated lanuage, and simplified thought processes. When it was from the POV of the Dad he used more intense, hard hitting language, and more complicated thought processes.

However you do it, good luck with it, I'm daunted at the prospect of writing a novel, let alone attempting to do one from 3PL.

Lou

 

[wornoutkeyboard]

Thanks...

Everyone for your responses.

I think I am having a major head tripwith this novel...lol....and I just feel like it is coming out like uber-crap this time. Well... it all comes out as crap on the first few drafts...but this is turbo-powered crap. When it doesn't read staccato, it reads like a cliche handbook for the mentally defunct.

I like the story/idea so I am sticking with it. And I like the POV, so I am sticking with it....so I guess I am just torturing myself...lol.

Thank you all for the advice. Like Icing & Lou said... I think I am going to try bending the rules a little bit and see how it works out in revision. Maybe I will be able to clean it up in revision, maybe I won't.

I was thinking about it last night before I went to sleep....one of my other problems with 3PL is that I am a heavy dialogue person (OK... extra-absorbant, super dialogue person) and it is so hard to convey exactly the nuances of another's character's feelings through their speech without having to say "he smiled," "she laughed," or what-not. Normally I could just jump into their heads and tell you what they were thinking....but alas, I cannot do this anymore.

Anyhoo, back to writing....

~WOK

 

[Sabledrake]

WOK -- I've written several 3rd-person POV novels, so I've been through what you're facing. The dialogue can get especially tricky, what with trying to avoid the dreaded adverbs but still get the speaker's emotions across. Good luck with it, and if you need someone to take a look at a sample chapter, I'd be happy to volunteer.

Sabledrake

 

[raphy]

3PL is my PoV of choice, to be honest. I love writing in it, because for me, it makes it easier to put the reader right in the protagonist's mind, without having to fight through the problems of true 1st-person narrative.

Writing it in 1st person and switching after is definitely one way to get around some of your problems, though. I often think it in 1st person, then write in 3rd. It helps with the 'limited' part of 3PL.

Looking at your questions specifically though:

I am having a really hard time describing the actions and motivations of others without sounding weak.

eg-

"John appeared anxious, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other."

You describe what your protagonist can see/sense/infer. No more, and no less.

Does this happen after dialoque? Would it be better to write the dialogue then the line, that way you can drop the 'John appeared bit'.. Something like this (Assuming your protagonist isn't John. In this example, I'll call her Kayleigh:

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

He looked anxious, Kayleigh thought. John didn't normally look that anxious, but his eyes were darting all over the room, from one corner to another.

Remember, you're seeing everything through the eyes of your protagonist. What impressions you give the reader of the thoughts/feelings/motivations of others have to come from inside the head of your main character.

Now, obviously, you don't want to overdo the 'Kayleight thought' lines, but there's lots of ways to get inside the head of your main character without that sort of repetition. Even something as simple as showing us what he's looking at, then giving us a thought will be enough to tell the intelligent reader what that thought refers to.

"I'm not happy about this either."

Her voice. That accent. He almost cried. Right then, there, in the car, with the wind and the smog and Bach on the radio.

His gaze flicked from her jawline to her eyes. She wasn't looking at him, just talking at him.

"I'm not happy about anything that's happened."

The edge in her voice again. He saw it then. Why she wasn't looking at him. He saw it in the tightness of her grasp in the steering wheel, the whiteness of her knuckles. He saw it at the corner of her eyes. She was fighting not to cry.

In essence, you have to take liberties with the social awareness of your protagonist. In certain situations, he/she can be super-aware, able to read minds and ferret out emotions, by body language clues, because your protagonist's ability to decipher other people's feelings is your only means of transmitting them to the reader

"Not bad for an old man."

Dev shook his head to clear it. He looked down at the floor. It was white, as well. Even the gaps between the tiles had been painted white. He looked up, searching for the source of the voice. A kid. Well, maybe late twenties, but a kid nonetheless. Tall, broad shouldered and dangerously confident, with big, capable-looking hands. Dev took in the shaven head and heavy combat boots, the leather soft and well-cared for. Not just a punk, then. He finally found his voice. "An old man who only just got out," he grunted.

The kid inclined his head in acquiescence. "True," he said. Dark skin. Dark eyes. Olive, even. Mexican or Spanish. "They did say you used to be good."

... (stuff snipped) ...

The kid nodded towards the door.

"Okay then, old man who only just got out," he said. "Let's go." No mockery in his voice, no dancing teases in his dark, serious eyes. No, Dev thought, definitely not just another punk.


It's all about getting inside the head of your protagonist. That's why I love writing in 3PL.

Anyway, I think I've babbled enough. Hope some of that was even vaguely helpful.

Good luck with it!

R.

 

[raphy]

Totally forgot about your second question, WOK..

Transitions from scene to scene - Yes, when I'm writing them, I just make the jump. I don't bother writing what happens in the intervening time period. I try and end the scene with a good exit line, then start the next with an equally good opener.

 

[KillerMuffin]

I adore third person limited. It's my fave POV, actually. The problem a lot of people seem to have with it is too much distance from the character. You're the narrator, he's the character. Right? Wrong. He's the narrator, too. The reason this is problem is the "telling v. showing" thing.

"John appeared anxious, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other."

Who is the narrator? The author. This is telling, not showing.

John licked his lips, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other like a trapped rat looking for a bolt hole.

Don't tell us John appeared anxious. Show us he did. You would certainly never say "I appeared anxious, my eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other." It sounds just a little silly.

You get used to thinking of yourself as the person telling the story, especially if you're into first person or omniscient POVs because, essentially, you are. Limited really forces you to make sure it's the character telling the story in order to keep it from sounding so wooden or fairy-tale-ish. Some stories and some writers can do that, they work better with the "telling" thing than otherwise. It's pretty safe to say, however, that keeping the protagonist as the narrator throughout is usually the best route.



Here's an example from one of my favorite of my own stories. I realize it looks like a bad BDSM story, but it's really just a bad BDSM-set satire.

Lancelot dropped his beer on the floor just so he could see the waitress's naked keister when she bent over to pick it up. She would make a good sub. He could see her tied, gagged, and bent over to prop his feet up on when he watched wrasslin.' SuperSlam was on Sunday and he'd already ponied up the cash for pay-per-view. Now he just needed a bitch to get his beer.

The waitress moved on before he could cop a feel, so he grunted and lounged against the back of the booth again. He'd get her next time around. She had to take his order again sometime or she wouldn't get a tip from–-hold the phones sister. The bouncer waved some new broad on into the bar without taking a cover even. The bastard had charged him twenty bucks to get in. This chick was stacked, a little on the short side, no taste in clothes, but she had a good hank of hair. He liked to wrap his hands up in a bitch's hair when he was fucking her. She had those big lips like the Tomb Raider girl. What'd they call 'em? Poofy? Perky? Pouty, that was it. They'd look good wrapped around a ball gag.

He dipped his hand to his zipper and started scratching himself slowly.

She stepped hesitantly into the bar, taking stock of the place before selecting a bar stool somewhere near the middle. She took a napkin and wiped it off before daintily perching her ass on it. Nice butt. A little too perky for him, but not bad. Softer cans took the whip better. She said something to the bartender–a stuck up cunt if he'd ever seen one–and then slid some cash across the bar. A few minutes later the bartender dropped something fizzy in front of her.

Hot damn she was a sub. He knew a few Dommes, they were some hard up bitches, and they drank shots of shit like vodka. He pretty much figured out that they were locked into some kind of Olga the wonder Nazi fantasy. A good caning would do 'em good.

 

[wornoutkeyboard]

Muffin....

I love that little snippet! That is fan-tab-ulous...lol.

Thank you all for your advice on 3PL. With the advice and the examples given by yourself, Raphy & et al. I think I am really starting to see where the problems are.

Sometimes when it is your own work... you can just look at it for hours and all you can notice is that "something" is wrong.

I think you may have hit it.... in 3PL I am telling the story and not showing it. I feel like I am having to "filter" the information...when I should really be "seeing" the information.

Well... as GI Joe says... knowing is 1/2 the battle.

The only problem is...it is only 1/2 the battle.

Any volunteers on the other 1/2??

~WOK

 

[Pure]

I see lots of good ideas, e.g., from Uther, KM, raphy.

Some have mentioned the first person, or 'translating' from it, but I don't think it's been sufficiently stressed that 3PL has no special difficulty (in relation to the first person) of the sort you describe:

//I am having a really hard time describing the actions and motivations of others without sounding weak.

eg-

"John appeared anxious, his eyes darting from one corner of the room to the other."//

If you write a lot from the first person, surely you have run into this exact problem.


I came into the room and saw John. _What the hell is going on with him?_ , I thought. He looked really jumpy and his eyes were darting about.

"What the fuck's the matter with you?" I said. It took him a moment to focus, then "I don't know when they're coming to get me."
"Who?"
"The enforcers, the guys with the baseball bats. Oh shit oh shit."

As in KM's example, the direct expression of thoughts either as such or in the whatya call it 'indirect narrative"(?)


_Jesus, John's so jumpy_ I thought. _What the fuck is he twisting his hands for? Is he expecting the mob enforcer or what._
"What's happening?" I asked and he didn't even hear me he was so fucked up. _This sonovabitch is in for some serious trouble and he knows it. .... And it's not suprising considering all the money he borrowed from the loan sharks._

There is nothing in the above passages that won't directly transpose. For every "I" put "Dodgson"; for 'me' put 'him' etc.
Is there some problem with that, that I'm missing?

Keep us posted.

J.

PS I do not see the problem and understand the approach raphy suggests:

/In essence, you have to take liberties with the social awareness of your protagonist. In certain situations, he/she can be super-aware, able to read minds and ferret out emotions, by body language clues, because your protagonist's ability to decipher other people's feelings is your only means of transmitting them to the reader./

I don't see the need for any 'liberty' taking or 'super awareness.'
There are, as in first person, about three main alternatives re other's mental states:

1) Inferences from signs: the white knuckles and all that:

2) Conversations I.e., very disjointed if the person is having a mental breakdown.

3) Best of all, the statements of the other. That allows the most detail without any taking of liberties.


"What's the matter I asked?"
[Or, I watched and listened as Louisa tried to find out what what was happening. "What's the matter?" she said.]

"I don't know; it's sort of like a fear, but I can't tell what I'm afraid of. I don't know what to do. There's a knot is my stomach. My thoughts are racing around like crazy."
----

Again, I see no obstacle to direct transposition to 3PL, replacing the "I's" with "Dodgson."

-----
The first person will of course be limited, vis a vis God's eye, but those limitations are material to work with. "I" or "Bella" simply will not know what's going on:

"Why are you looking at me that way?" I asked.
"Oh, I just enjoy your cute eyes." Later, alone in his apartment I understood the look. I saw it again as he tied me to the chair and took out a large knife.

J.

 

[CWatson]

I'll fix off transitioning first, because it's much more minor. Aside from a plain CUT TO where you end the scene on a snappy line and then move to the next one, you can also change tone entirely and throw in a short summary of what happened inbetween. Example, from a story I'm working on currently:

"Hold on," she said after he had stammered through something awkward and unplanned. "I've had a long day, I can't stand all these verbal gymnastics. Are you asking me to go out with you tonight?"

"Uh," said Will. "Yeah, I suppose I am."

"Sure," Robin said, and they arranged to meet in several hours.

So Will got to go back to his apartment that he shared with his friends and tell them he had gotten a date. They cheered him and congratulated him and plied him with condoms. All things considered, though, Will was pretty sure he wasn't going to need them.

The entire date is actually handled in two paragraphs of showing summary; I only move into telling when they actually start talking (Will makes his breakthrough with Robin the Ice Queen). Why tell the entire date when, frankly, it's not really important, except as a prefix to the breakthrough conversation?

Moral: Showing has its benefits.



As to the other: I love 3PL, it's what I work in most frequently (the next being 1P). I'm not entirely sure where I learned it, but that's how I first picked up writing. The reason I like it is that I get my Viewpoint Character's thoughts, AND you get to filter everyone ELSE through that character. If you have a fun viewpoint character (Robert Jordan's Matrim Cauthon, for instance) you can have an ENORMOUS amount of fun with this viewpoint. ("Nervous. Ha! Decent woman. Ha!") Plus, it provides a compromise between the skin-on-skin distance of a 1P (not every character is INTERESTING enough to stand up to a 1P) and the omniscient boredom of 3PO. Plus, you can steal a page from 3PO's book and, if you're careful, SWITCH Viewpoint Characters while nobody's looking. You have to be careful about it, because if your readers don't pick up on the focus change, they'll get confused when John wanders out of the "view" and they only have Marsha in it instead. But this flexibility cannot be understated. No other view gives you this much intimacy and flexibility.

The key to it: report what your V(iew)P(oint)C(haracter) thinks, report what s/he sees. If John is nervous, have him ACT nervous, and then have your VPC pick up on that. ("Will seemed awfully tense today. Robin wondered why.") You may have to be more subtle than you're used to, but that's okay, because you can also throw in commentary. No more "Marsha was feeling depressed that day, so she bought a box of doughnuts." Instead, "Tim thought something was wrong with Marsha. What could anyone want a dozen doughnuts for? Maybe she and her boyfriend had some weird fetishes going on."

...Does that help any? I'm not really sure where I was going anymore. But, good luck, hope it works for you.

 

[raphy]

PS I do not see the problem and understand the approach raphy suggests:

/In essence, you have to take liberties with the social awareness of your protagonist. In certain situations, he/she can be super-aware, able to read minds and ferret out emotions, by body language clues, because your protagonist's ability to decipher other people's feelings is your only means of transmitting them to the reader./

I don't see the need for any 'liberty' taking or 'super awareness.'
There are, as in first person, about three main alternatives re other's mental states:

1) Inferences from signs: the white knuckles and all that:

2) Conversations I.e., very disjointed if the person is having a mental breakdown.

3) Best of all, the statements of the other. That allows the most detail without any taking of liberties.

Aaah, I only said that, because most of us walk around in a state of total social unawareness and wouldn't be able to spot the emotional state of another human being unless they were carrying a big card.

A lot of my protagonists are 'super-aware' and spot things that a normal person would miss, thus allowing me to deliver them to the reader.

Wade drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair. He turned his head just slightly and Hunter caught it then in the reflection in the glass behind him. Just a flicker. A tenseness around the eyes. Hunter looked again, but it was gone. He'd seen it though. It had been there. Hunter didn't make mistakes like that. Wade Garrett was worried.

 

[Pure]

Hi raphy,

you said,

//A lot of my protagonists are 'super-aware' and spot things that a normal person would miss, thus allowing me to deliver them to the reader.

Wade drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair. He turned his head just slightly and Hunter caught it then in the reflection in the glass behind him. Just a flicker. A tenseness around the eyes. Hunter looked again, but it was gone. He'd seen it though. It had been there. Hunter didn't make mistakes like that. Wade Garrett was worried.//

I don't dispute your right to have 'superaware' characters or a superaware 'primary figure' (to whom the 3PL is limited). And what you write in that way seems very intriguing.

What I wonder is 'why?'

You want to tell the reader that Wade is worried, and appear eager, desperately eager, to contrive a way. I suppose you're borrowing from a 3PO, in effect, trying to let the reader peer into the minds of others. Why?

In first person narrative, there are times when things are not clear. That's how life is, and I'm kind of a 'purist' about a first person narrative with its own integrity.

"I saw Wade sitting there, and because it was dark, could not make out his face very well. _Was he worried_? I wondered. I didn't know. So I approached him, and we eventually agreed on a plan."

Hunter saw Wade sitting there, and because it was dark, could not make out his face very well. _Is he worried?_ Hunter thought. _Damned if I know_. So Hunter approached him, and they eventually agreed on a plan.

One has the device of shift in time, if it's essential to bring out something prematurely [these pieces attach to the respective piece above]:

".... I didn't know. Later, of course, what was on Wade's mind became very clear to me. Then I was clueless. I'd missed a few obvious clues, like his repeatedly excusing himself to go and make phone calls. All I found out the following week made it quite obvious that that night Wade had been worried as hell, and further was already planning to do something very foolish."


"... and they eventually agreed on a plan. Later, of course, what was on Wade's mind became quite clear, but right then, Hunter was in the dark. The obvious clues went right by: Wade kept excusing himself to go and make phone calls. The following week made it obvious to Hunter that that night Wade had been worried as hell, and further was planning to do something very foolish."

Again, I've shown the simple substitutions that allow the 3PL to proceed with its integrity. In making them, I notice that 3PL is less forgiving of starting sentence with the same name, where "I" occured, and so I made some stylistic variations.

From my pov, the immediacy of "I" narration is kept by allowing for 'don't know'. Just as in life. In moving to 3PL, my opinion is let the reader ONLY know one mind. Keep the integrity of the narrative. IF you want to reader to know lots of minds at the same time, then choose 3PO. Then nothing has to be contrived.

best,

J.

 

[raphy]

Oh, I agree that most of the fun from writing in 3PL comes from the limited viewpoint. It's 1-person without being 1-st person. I don't do that all the time, only when I have something I want to specifically portray to the reader.

That said, I like to have my main protagonist notice stuff anyway, but I think that's a cyberpunk thing.

 

[Mhari]

3PL

*gasp* Delurking, though just briefly..

I write almost exclusively in 3PL. I love how it lets me get deep into the heads of my characters. Of course, sometimes that's a bit scary, too. Basically, you need to *become* your character. While you're writing from his/her POV, you only see what they see, know what they know. Don't know if that's at all helpful.

It is very different from 3PO, which I've tried and don't care for. Much more fun to keep your audience guessing along with your characters!

Hmm, possibly you should also consider the idea of the "unreliable narrator". What your character sees/perceives isn't necessarily the truth. Just as in real life we can misinterpret what's going on around us, so should your characters. That can also be fun. *grin*

As for transitions...just end the scene snappily, as Raphy suggests, and move right along to the next one.

 

[raphy]

Re: 3PL

*gasp* Delurking, though just briefly..

Oh shit, I'm in for it now......

 

[Mhari]

Re: Re: 3PL

Oh shit, I'm in for it now......

*grins wickedly and says nothing*

 

[raphy]

Mhari, meet the AH.

AH, meet Mhari, a good friend of mine.

Raph, wondering what he's gotten himself into.

 

[Mhari]

Raph, wondering what he's gotten himself into.

*grins wickedly and says nothing*

 

[Guest]

*grins wickedly and says nothing*

Hi Mhari,

I hope you say something soon, I like a bit of controversy.

Lou